Growl (32 page)

She'd only been here for four days, and already the beauty of the woods had seeped into her bones. She'd never felt this connected to San Francisco, even though she'd grown up in the Bay Area and had lived in the city since college. Somehow, she'd have to come back here someday, though seeing Brad and Cain and not having this same relationship would probably make that impossible.

Why was it that it was easier for her to believe that men were werewolves than the fact that they seemed to want more than a vacation fling? They'd said over and over how much they wanted her to stay, that she was special, but her logical mind had to accept the truth that Brad was right, her parents really had done a job on her. When she thought of the lifelong emphasis on her weight, she realized that everything she did, every thought she had, was governed by the sense that she wasn't pretty enough for anyone to love her.

Including her mom and dad. If they'd loved her, wouldn't they have loved her the way she was, not the way they wished she'd been? Her mind was still spinning when they reached her cabin, and she and Brad had barely gotten inside when he turned, set the box of food on the table, and wrapped his arms around her.

“I've wanted to do this all afternoon. I missed you today.”

His mouth covered hers, so perfectly, his kiss so sweet, the sense of being protected and loved by him so strong, that she felt herself go soft and pliable in his arms, as if everything about her wanted to merge with Brad.

The oddest thing, though, was the sense that she missed Cain. She wanted him here to share this time every bit as much as she wanted Brad. She couldn't help it—she smiled into his kiss.

“What's so funny?” Brad nuzzled her throat, teased behind her ear with the tip of his tongue. She shivered.

“Don't take this wrong, please?” And then she blew it by giggling. “You'll think I'm such a slut!”

“You? A slut?” Brad leaned away from her, but his hands held her waist, kept their lower bodies perfectly aligned. “I don't think so.”

She rotated her hips against him, and he laughed. “Well, okay. Maybe a little, but mostly in the best possible way. So, why are you laughing?”

“Because you're amazing and hot and I want to get naked and rip your clothes off of you, and…”

“And there better be more, because I love what you're saying so far. Nothing slutty about it, either. Sounds like something that both of us want.” He leaned close, kissed her, and then leaned away again, watching her.

She blushed. Damn! She'd been doing so well, too. “Except I want both of you. You and Cain. Last night with the two of you…” She sighed. “I have never felt so incredibly shameless in my life, or so, so…” She let out a huff of air.

“Loved?” He went very quiet, watching her with a feral intensity so powerful it made her ache. “When the two of us were with you, loving you, did you feel loved?”

She couldn't speak. Her voice couldn't make it past the lump in her throat. No one fell in love in four days. It just didn't happen. It certainly couldn't happen to her, which meant it definitely wouldn't happen for Brad. What did he mean? Why did he ask her such a stupid thing?

“Cherry? Why aren't you answering me?”

His gaze never wavered, and she saw in his eyes that same wolf that slept on her bed, the same light of the hunter in that searing intensity.

“I can't.” It was all she could do to get those words past her tight throat.

“You're not afraid of me, of us, are you?”

She shook her head. Fear Brad and Cain? Absolutely not. “No,” she said. “Never.”

“I hope not, Cherry. It would break me if you were afraid of us. You're the most important person in our lives.”

He kissed her then, and there was no hesitancy in the way he took her with his mouth, with teeth and tongue and lips, his hands clasping the fullness of her buttocks, pulling her close, breathing her in, and owning her with his kisses. With his strength.

A knock on the door barely registered. Cain's voice pulled them apart, both of them breathing heavily. With shaking hands, Cherry turned away from Brad and opened the door. She stood back with her head bowed.

“What's wrong?” Cain quietly closed the door behind him and locked it. The sound of the latch slipping into place echoed in the quiet cabin. “Brad? What's going on?”

Brad shook his head. “I don't know. I'm not really sure. I was teasing Cherry and she said she'd never felt so shameless in her life. That even though she was with me, she wanted you here, too. Personally, I think that's a really good thing. But she…”

Cherry sighed. “I freaked. Cain, here's your dinner. You must be starved. Sit and eat. Brad? There's wine and beer in the refrigerator. Would you pour me a glass of wine? Get whatever you want.” She grabbed Cain's box of leftovers, checked to make sure they were still hot, and got some silverware out of a drawer in the tiny kitchen area. Brad brought a glass of white wine to the table for her, a beer for himself, and one for Cain.

She stared at her glass of wine for a moment and thought of how she would have dealt with a situation like this merely a week ago. She wouldn't have been able to. No, she'd have taken off like a scared rabbit, which was probably an excellent analogy, considering she was having this conversation with two men she was almost absolutely positive were wolves.

“Give me some credit here, guys. I'm trying.” She raised her head and smiled at Cain and then at Brad, but her gaze locked on him. He looked utterly confused, which made perfect sense. “I hear the
l
word and react like I expect most men to react. I panic.” Shaking her head, she laughed. It was so stupid. “Brad, you asked me why I didn't answer you? I couldn't. My throat locked up. Froze solid. I think it's the beginning of a panic attack, but I've got issues that go pretty deep.”

“I'm sorry.” Brad wrapped her fingers in his big hand. Strong hands. She loved how they felt on her. Loved what they made her feel. “I had no idea and I pushed you,” he said.

Cain didn't say anything. He just ate his dinner, sipped his beer, and paid attention. Sometimes she felt as if he processed so much behind that disinterested look of his. Maybe someday she'd get the chance to figure him out.

She stared at the way Brad's fingers wrapped around hers.

“I've told you bits and pieces about that guy in high school. He was my very first boyfriend, which is a huge thing for a girl, especially when she's fat and nerdy and socially inept. The first guy who pays attention, who's cute and nice and makes her feel good about herself. The first—and only—boy to ever say he loved me. The first person. Even my parents withheld their love as long as I wasn't perfect, and that just made me eat more, but I was a needy idiot and I believed him when he said he loved me. Only he didn't. He needed me to help him pass calculus. Turns out, he'd bragged to his friends that I'd get him through the course and he'd get into me before the semester ended.”

“Bastard.” Cain glanced at her and his jaw clenched. He shoved the chair back, abruptly stood, paced across the room, and then returned. Grabbing the back of the chair, he stood there, hanging on with his head bowed. “I am so damned sorry, Cherry. I had no idea.”

Cain's words meant a lot to her. It was the only thing he'd said since they sat down, and he already knew most of the story. Though not the worst of it.

Brad's grasp on her hand tightened. Knowing these two men—men, not boys—sympathized gave her the courage to tell the rest. Raising her head, she focused on Cain. On his anger. Somehow, it strengthened her, the fact that he was so blindly furious for her. “The thing is, he didn't just tell his friends; he showed them. This was before Facebook was popular, but he'd hidden a camera in the car and posted nude pictures I didn't even know he'd taken. They were up on another social networking site that was popular at the time, and I only heard about them when one of my friends, a boy in that same class, saw them. Christa freaked when I told her what happened, but not as badly as me. I tried to kill myself. Christy stopped me and told my parents what had happened. They were able to get the pictures taken down, but the damage was done. My parents and I have hardly spoken since. There was no recourse against the boy, since the sex was consensual and I was eighteen.”

“That is so fucking wrong.” Cain glared at Brad, who nodded silently in agreement.

“It is what it is. I was supposed to be valedictorian, but once the pictures got out, my name was removed from the list. I quit school, but I already had enough credits to graduate. I'd been accepted to college with scholarships to pay most of my expenses. My parents gave me the money they'd put away for my education, but then they cut ties and so did I.”

“That explains why Christa and you are so close, why she's so protective of you.”

She wiped tears off her face with her free hand. She wasn't about to turn loose of Brad's “Exactly, Brad. Cissy is an absolute saint. She had to put up with so much crap in high school and it was all my fault.”

“None of it was your fault.” Cain grabbed her hand, rubbed his thumb through the tears on her fingers. She raised her head. He was absolutely furious.

“It was that bastard's fault, and the school's for not protecting you. Your parents failed you. They should have stood by you, supported you, not ‘cut ties' with you. Damn it all, Cherry. Was that prick allowed to graduate?”

When she nodded, both he and Brad cursed.

“Cherry?” She turned to Brad. “Do you see how wrong that is? That you, the victim, suffered, and the asshole who attacked you and your good name got off without any repercussions at all?”

“He didn't force me.”

“He lied to you,” Cain said. “He set you up and victimized you. You told me you were a virgin when that happened, which means he stole something very precious from you. Don't let him keep winning. When you make decisions based on what he did to you, you're letting that son of a bitch win. Never again, Cherry. No matter what happens, you're never to feel like a victim. You're better than that, and you're a damned sight better than him.”

She almost laughed. It was either that or cry. “I've been telling myself that for years, that I'm better, but unfortunately I'm not very convincing. In the internal debate, my inner coward appears to hold the upper hand.”

“This one week may not be enough time to reprogram your inner coward.” Cain smiled at her when he pushed his chair back under the table. “You'll need to stay with us at least another week to turn you into a powerful Amazonian warrior.”

He was teasing, but she really wished … “I doubt my boss would agree. I didn't give her much warning when I took off for this week.”

Cain dumped his empty box and paper plates in the trash and rinsed out the silverware in the sink. Then he turned and leaned against the counter with his arms folded across his chest. He really looked like he needed to be leaning against a big Harley, not the cute little kitchen counter in her cabin. There was something so elemental about the man. Brad had that same sense of wildness, but where his was gentle and kind with merely a hint of the beast, Cain was the alpha in the room.

Which was another thing—one she was still too cowardly to ask. Was he an alpha wolf? If she had to choose between Brad and Cain, she'd pick Cain as the more dominant, but if she were to look at the group of men here as a whole—the pack, in wolf terms—she would name Trak as the alpha. He was a big man, though not the biggest. So far, that would be Tuck, the vet, but there was something about Trak, an indefinable sense of leadership, that set him apart, whether human or wolf. Except she had no proof. These two terrific guys probably already thought she was certifiably nuts. If she was wrong and asked them if they were werewolves they'd probably run for the hills.

Of course, they were already in the hills, but—

“Cheraza?”

Jerked out of her wandering thoughts, she looked at Cain. “What?”

He laughed. “What's going on in that head of yours?”

She shrugged and improvised. “That I'm tired of rehashing my old news and I'd really much rather see you naked.” She turned and pointed at Brad. “And you, too.”

“Works for me,” he said. Shoving his chair back from the table, he stood—and very methodically began stripping out of his clothes.

 

CHAPTER 18

“Now look who's the only one dressed.” Brad raised an eyebrow and glanced at Cain, who nodded. Then they both focused on Cherry, and she felt that damned blush crawl across her skin. The two of them watched her for a moment longer. Once again they looked at each other.

Then they stalked her.

Brad came in from her right, Cain from the left. Each of them took hold of an arm. Her gaze flashed right then left and right again. “What are you doing?”

“This.” Cain nodded to Brad and they both leaned over and caught her beneath her back and thighs and then carried her to the bed.

Giggling, she pretended to struggle, but they dropped her on the bed and methodically stripped all the clothes off of her. Holding down her shoulders and thighs, they gently restrained her, but she was still totally immobile.

Of course, she wasn't trying to get away. Her heart was thundering, but it wasn't fear.

It was arousal, pure and simple.

Brad offered a suggestion. “Should we tie her up?”

“What?” They wouldn't. Would they? Maybe they would! She shivered—anticipation, not fear, and that alone was a turn-on. She'd never thought she'd enjoy being restrained, but with these two …

“It would be more fun.” Cain gave her an innocent look. “Well, it would.”

“Fun for whom?” She was not going to give in easily. She stared at Cain, then at Brad.

“For us,” he said. “That's two out of three who are guaranteed a great time.” He gave her a wide-eyed look. “Not to say you wouldn't enjoy yourself. I'm almost certain you would.”