GABRIEL (Killer Book 2) (5 page)

I lean down and kiss her lips before pulling her eyelids down.

“Goodnight. I hope you find happiness on the other side. Maybe we will meet again. Perhaps you will haunt my dreams with the others.”

"Total paranoia is just total awareness."

-Charles Manson

Age Seventeen

“Dani girl, you belong to me. Forever, you will belong to me. You may not know it yet, but you’re perfection. You’re everything that I’ve ever wanted. You’re mine, my beautiful Dani girl.” He said as he held me tightly in his arms.

He’d always done that, beating me bloody, using me until I no longer felt human.

But then, he would hold me tightly and whisper sweet nothings into my ear. He would kiss every wound. It was the only time that I ever felt loved.

Little did I know, it would be the last time that I’d ever see him.

As I sit here staring at the wall of my small prison, my heart doesn’t pump any faster than it normally would. I’m completely numb from the inside out, this occurs when I know that I’m in danger, when I know that I’m trapped.

I’d learned that a long time ago when my father would lock me in the closet for hours on end, to the point where I soiled and wet myself. When my little stomach was so hungry, that I began to believe that my own body was eating itself from the inside out.

I learned not to scream because it would make me thirstier, and I learned not to cry because it would be useless.

I learned that I was a whore when he raped me repeatedly. Light became my friend, and darkness, the enemy.

The mind can be a fragile thing, but it can also turn off when you need it to, especially after your heart has been ripped from your chest over and over and over again.

This is nothing. I’ve seen worse, I’ve hurt worse and I’ve survived worse.

As soon as I woke in here, I knew it was him. I knew, because his eyes told me a dangerous story. I knew, because he made me feel. It was either falling for him, or this. Ironically, I would choose this over love.

Life has taught me that love can be the most dangerous, painful thing that you will ever encounter.

The lock clicks, but I don’t bother to look. There isn’t a point in allowing myself to believe in his beauty over his intentions. Intentions are what matter.

“Come here.”

Without a word, I stand and approach him, keeping my eyes locked onto his chest.

My body grows rigid when he reaches towards my tank top, his fingers pinching the hem as he lifts the fabric.

This, this is when I am certain that I’ll lose my shit. No other man has touched me, I’ve never allowed it. Not after what my father did. How are you supposed to trust anyone else after the one man that was supposed to love and protect you hurt you time and time again? I’ll tell you how – you don’t. You live the rest of your life trusting no one.

I grab his wrists and my eyes find his as I slowly shake my head, “Please.”

“It doesn’t work that way. It’s time that you face your demons.”

I step away, “Then let me. I can undress myself.”

He tilts his head as he steps forward, “Lesson one. Trust.” He grasps the fabric as my hands frantically grab at it, but it’s no use as he rips it down the middle.

I drop to my knees as the sobs rock through me like a thunderstorm, but he grabs my arms and pulls me back to my feet.

I feel his breath on my lips as I squeeze my eyes shut, “Look at me, Dani.”

Keeping my eyes shut, I turn my head to the side.

“Look at me!” He roars, causing me to flinch.

I refuse, and he fists my hair, pulling my head back and grasping my jaw tightly in his large hand, “Love, I am not a patient man when it comes to bratty girls not behaving when given a command.” His voice is wavering as he tries to calm himself, but I feel his insanity filling the air – it’s so dense that I feel as if my lungs are unable to fully expand.

My eyes spring open, allowing the tears to stream down my cheeks, “Go fuck yourself, you asshole!”

He sneers at me as his fist tightens in my hair, “You would do well to learn to watch your tongue,” He leans in close, his eyes shining with annoyance, “Or I will rip it out.”

Before I can respond, he turns and yanks me behind him. I fall, and the stone floor bites into my hipbone, causing me to yelp. I kick and scream as he drags me from the room and down the hall.

I claw at his arm as he drags me by my hair, but he doesn’t falter. I’ve angered him, and now he will make me pay the price.

I’m dragged into another room. The air leaves my lungs. I feel like I’ve been catapulted back into the medieval ages. Hooks are hanging, chains meant to imprison are bolted down and whips are everywhere.

He makes quick work of removing my pajama pants as I wiggle about. He succeeds, then he grasps my ankles and then my wrists, quickly cuffing them. The chains allow no movement as my knees are pulled beneath me and my hands are stretched above my head.

I tilt my head up and look around frantically, but he’s outside of my line of vision. “You’re a sick man, Gabriel! You can’t do this! Do you hear me?”

He doesn’t respond, and I shriek as he begins spraying me down with cold water.

He’s relentless as he washes me down. When he begins spraying my face, I choke as the water gets inside of my nose and throat.

Finally, he stops and kneels down in front of me, “You don’t get it.”
“Get… what…?” I say between coughs.

He smiles slightly as he looks into my eyes, “You are mine now, your demons belong to me, and I will make you face them. You can’t keep running away, Dani.”

Then, he kisses my head before turning and leaving me alone to shiver in the cold puddle of water beneath me.

"I regret with all my heart what my hand has done. I have taken what I cannot return. If only I could bend back the hands of that ageless clock and change the past. Ah, but alas, I am not the keeper of time, only a small part of history and the legacy of man's fall from grace. I'm sorry."

-Danny Rolling

I watch as Kayla glides through the warm air. The sun shines through the trees, catching the glitter on her cheeks each times she passes through the multiple tunnels of light that nature has created. She smiles as the euphoria spreads through her, moving her arms up and down slowly, mimicking a bird.

“So, how’s shit going, man? I haven’t seen you in a while.” Shawn asks.

I sigh as he pinches the skin of my back before sliding the hook through, “Good. Just work. That’s about it.”

He laughs, “Yeah, I hear you there.”

He inserts the rest of the hooks and I let out a sigh of gratitude as I stand, feeling the curved metal weighing down my skin.

He steps in front of me. The guy is covered in ink, his ears are stretched and he has metal all over his face. I have my fair share of ink, but not many people have ever seen it. Each tattoo resembles my victim’s last story, the final words that they spoke to me.

“That one new? Looks badass.” Shawn remarks, nodding towards the new addition over my chest. It’s a mural, all of their stories are connected. My new addition is a decrepit teddy bear, because there was no way I was going to ask Jed, my tattoo artist, to add a purple sparkly plush toy.

“Yeah. Thanks.” I respond as I make my way to the tree. Shawn moves behind me and my eyelids flutter with each pull of the hooks. Once my feet leave the ground, I feel as if fifty tons has been lifted off of me, and when Shawn gives me a push, I feel the air through my hair as my mind wanders to a place that I can feel peace. Alone within the walls of my mind where there are no societal expectations, only blackness and silence.

Nineteen Years Old (Amherst, MA)

I groaned as I stretched my body. I’d gone out with my new friends that I’d made at UMass. I remember drinking a few beers before we all began taking shots. The party was being held at one of the frat houses. Hot girls were everywhere. It was exciting, at least what I can remember was exciting.

Now, here I was, hungover. Probably missing class.

I struggled to open my eyes against the sunlight. Blinking a few times, it looked as if I were in a spare bedroom. It was nothing fancy. The curtains were plaid blue and there were a couple of posters tacked to the white walls, but other than that, it didn’t look lived in.

I sat up and rubbed my eyes with the back of my wrist. I frowned when I felt rubber wrapped tightly around my hands and fingers. Holding my hands before my face, I swallowed hard when I saw what looked to be blood staining the latex surface of the gloves that I happened to be wearing.

My eyes travelled around the room, and stopped when I saw a form under the white sheet beside me in the bed. It was the size of a human, and it didn’t move. I squeezed my eyes shut and prayed. I’d never, ever prayed before. But I did then, because the sickening feeling that was swirling in my stomach told me that I had done something horrible.

Finally, I dared to open my eyes and reached toward the lump beneath the sheet. At first, I wrapped my fingers around what I was assuming to be their shoulder and gave them a little shake. When they remained still, I frantically shook them harder and harder until the sheet moved down a bit. My eyes grew wide when I saw the long black hair spread across the white pillow.

I scrambled from the bed and onto the floor. I stared at that black hair for a while before I got to my feet and approached the other side of the bed. I gripped the blanket and exhaled as I swiftly pulled it from her body.

My mouth was moving in such a way - it seemed that I was saying something, but it wasn’t audible. My fists were balled at my sides as I slowly backed away, blinking rapidly to clear my eyes of the tears that had collected in them.

Her skin was milky white. It reminded me of snow. Her long hair seemed like it would have been beautiful at one point, but now it was dull and lifeless. And her eyes… her eyes were deep pools of black. Her spidery eyelashes curled up over her heavy eyelids. She was completely nude, and I wanted to vomit when I saw the marks all over her body. Bite marks, cuts. They were everywhere. Her neck had a deep wound. She’d been cut from ear to ear, the sheet below her was bright red.

My eyes snapped to a window across the room before they darted back to her. She was definitely dead.

I pressed my palms against my temples as my breathing quickened. I didn’t, did I? Did I kill her? The idea that I could have been like my father had always lingered in the back of my mind, but I thought that it was normal. The obsessive idea that his sickness had somehow crept into my veins - it’s always plagued me. But I’m no killer. I wouldn’t kill an innocent person for my own twisted pleasure.

I ran to the window, flung it open, and jumped without thinking twice. I had to sort this out, and that certainly wouldn’t happen with me being in prison. Nobody would’ve believed me, especially with the knowledge of who my father was and what he had done so many years ago.

I hit the ground hard and rolled before leaping to my feet and running as fast as I could into the nearest woods.

I zipped past the white pines and jumped over the small streams as I came across them. My eyes were frantically scanning the spaces between the trees, but then, I lost my footing and went tumbling down an embankment, hitting my hip hard on a jagged rock.

“Fuck!” I exclaimed as I grasped my wound.

I heard something land beside me followed by another object. It was my phone and my wallet, and my eyes snapped towards the figure that stood ominously against the backdrop of morning fog.

“You’re sloppy. That would have gotten you caught, Gabriel.” The shadow man said.

I glared at him as I jumped to my feet, “What the fuck? What was that back there?”

He snickered as he shook his head, “Well, it seems that you have a murderous side after all.”

“No.” I growled, narrowing my eyes at him. “That was all you. I would never hurt anyone.”

He laughed as he tilted his head back. “Me? But I don’t exist Gabriel. Remember? I’m a figment of your imagination. Do you know why? Because you’re crazy. You’re a crazy murderer. Just. Like. Him.”

“Fuck you!” I hollered, my chest shaking with each word, “Just leave me alone!”

He stood completely still, and I was sure that his eyes never left me as I stood, pathetically begging for this imaginary figure to allow me to live a normal life. That’s if he had any eyes at all. I can’t imagine there being anything under that hood being human. He was a demon that crawled from the deepest depths of hell, and for whatever reason, this monster decided to torment my mind.

Finally, he turned and began walking away.

“I’m going to go clean up your mess, Gabriel. I’ll always be here to clean up your messes, whether you like it or not.”

Where the mysterious pale woman went – I don’t know. She was never found. Not a drop of blood or a strand of hair… nothing. It was as if she never existed.

I lean against the wall with my eyes shut. Her sobs pull at the strings of my heart, making me want to help her end it all now. Her mind is clouded with tormenting thoughts and whispers from the ghosts of the past.

I pull myself together as I push the door open. Her little fists are balled and her back shakes from each quaking sob that escapes her. Her soft hair falls around her as the chains rattle with each small movement.

My eyes are met with the blue of hers, a blue that I’ve never seen before, a blue that holds intense sadness and so, so much hurt.

“Gabriel, let me go.” She rasps as she narrows her eyes at me.

I shake my head as I pull the ring of keys from my pocket, “No Dani.”

“Why?” She wails as I kneel down beside her and get to work at removing the cuffs. She flinches when I rub my thumb over where the metal had bitten into her skin.

“I want to help you.” I murmur.

I sit back on my heels when she laughs dryly, “Help me? You really are fucking crazy.”

I grit my teeth in response, “Stop saying that.”

She gets up on wobbly hands and knees, “What? Crazy? You are, Gabriel. Normal people do not do things like this.”

Grabbing her arm harshly, I pull her to her feet, “I can leave you here all night, or we can get started.”

She tilts her head to the side, “There isn’t anything you can do to me that hasn’t been done.”

I smirk as I pull her close, “I highly doubt that.”