He nodded and leaned his hand on his palm. “So...what’s the deal?”
“What do you mean?”
“What just happened?”
She got embarrassed all of a sudden. “I’m sorry I...thought that...well you know, with that other girl, and then I...you know, with Andy...”
He shrugged. “It’s whatever. You thought you saw something, and you overreacted?”
She nodded. “A bit.”
“But that’s not what I wanted to talk about.”
She shook her head. “No. I don’t understand. You say this is just casual sex, but yet...you were definitely pissed when you thought that I had fooled around with Andy.”
“And you were pissed when you thought I had been fooling around with another girl.”
“I was jealous,” she admitted.
“I don’t know what I was. I’ve...never felt that before. All I know is that I didn’t like it when I saw you with Anderson.”
They sat in silence for a moment. The waitress brought them glasses of water. Beck nodded at her politely but didn’t take a second glance even as the girl leaned over to show her cleavage. He remained silent until the girl finally left.
“So...” This was awkward.
“I don’t know what you want me to say,” he said.
“I’m not going to lie to you, Beck. I know I told you I’m not looking for a relationship, but that doesn’t mean that I’m okay with just sitting back and watching you do other girls, not anymore. I don’t like not being on the top of your list. In fact, I don’t like not being the only one on your list. I mean, it’s pretty well known that we’re messing around. When you fool around with other girls, I look like some stupid, weak slut. When we started this, I thought we’d keep it hidden better. But we haven’t and now I’m the one who looks like a whore.”
“I don’t know what you want me to do about it.”
“I don’t know either.”
The waitress came with their food, and they paused the conversation until she was gone again.
Carmondy rolled the delicious looking fruit around in the bowl, her train of thought forgotten. “This looks great. Thank you.”
He nodded before looking at his own food. “I don’t like the thought of you with other guys...in other guys’ beds...other guys touching you...it makes me angry.”
That was unexpected.
He looked up and saw her expression. “I’m just being honest.”
“Of course, it’s just...I don’t understand.”
“And you think I do?”
“I guess not.”
“Then we need to re-evaluate.”
“Yeah.”
“I won’t date you.”
She almost laughed. “Yeah, I didn’t really consider that an option.”
“Is that what you were hoping for?”
“Honestly? No, it wasn’t,” she admitted.
“Good.”
“But...okay. I’m going to be honest here. I don’t want you having sex with other girls. I know that I am in no position to demand that. But I am. I mean, for all I know, you could be doing a girl every single night I’m not around. Or even after I leave. I don’t like the thought of that.”
“I’m not.”
“Not at all?”
“The one girl you saw a while ago. That’s it.”
“I don’t believe you.”
He shrugged. “I don’t care if you believe it or not. I don’t know what kind of sex robot you think I am, but sex with you is pretty taxing. You give me just about all I can take.”
There was something she wanted to say, something she needed to know. “Even though I won’t give you a blowjob?”
His eyes flipped up to look at her. “Yet?”
“Whatever you want to think...”
“Then yeah, even without the blowjob. Seriously, it’s not a deal breaker or anything.”
“Don’t you have urges to go to other girls for one then?”
Beck laughed and set his fork down. “Come here.” He motioned her over to his side of the table.
She glared at the chair he had pulled to his side. “If you want me beside you then you come over here.”
Beck assessed her for a moment, and she thought he might be angry as he slowly stood up and then sat back down in the chair next to her. He sat sideways on the chair facing her, his gaze intense.
“Come. Here.”
She was confused. He was already there.
His hand tugged on her waistband. She felt the urge to kiss him, and she suddenly knew what he meant.
She leaned forward, bracing both palms on his legs, leaning over his body to reach his lips.
Just as she was close, he leaned backwards, a playful smile on his lips.
She gave him a fake glare and chased his lips, not catching up to them until she was half sprawled across his body, but the kiss was worth the chase.
It was different from anything else she’d ever gotten from Beck. He was letting her take control without making her feel uncomfortable about it. He didn’t touch her and the fact that she had to crawl half into his lap said something also.
Only his lips were used to coax a reaction out of her and it worked just as well as when his hands were all over her naked body. If they hadn’t been in public, she would have climbed on top him of him and really taken control.
When she pulled back and saw the look on his face, she knew that the only reason the kiss had been like that was because they were in public. All the rules changed. It wasn’t fair, and she wished he would kiss her like that more often.
She sighed and turned back to her fruit bowl. Beck reached over and slid his plate over to his new position. They were both facing the window now.
Beck grabbed the edge of her chair and gave a tug, pulling her right next to him. She slid the bowl over a few inches to match her new position.
She tried to focus on her food but Beck wasn’t eating. One of his elbows was leaning on the table. The other arm was across the back of her chair so he was half facing her. “What is it?”
She took a bite of pineapple. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Something’s wrong. What is it?”
She hesitated but then said, “It’s not fair.”
“What isn’t?”
She looked up at him. “That you’ll kiss me like that in public, but not in private, where I can do something about it.”
He looked genuinely confused. “I don’t know what you mean... I thought you liked it.”
“I did! That’s my point.”
He shook his head slowly. “You lost me.”
She put her fork down and tried to explain. “In public, you let me kiss you. In private, you instigate. You’re always in charge. You do the pushing, I do the receiving.”
“Yeah... so?”
“So? I like that stuff, but I like it the other way too. It’s a two-way street for me, Beck. Yeah, you can get me off like no other, going the direction you always go. But I need the other direction to keep me sane. I just don’t understand why you don’t want to do it private, but public is okay.”
Beck opened his mouth and then closed it again, but looked like he had something he really wanted to way.
“What is it?” she asked, touching his knee.
“I do that because... I thought that’s what you wanted.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean. I thought you wanted it like that in the bedroom, me doing all the aggressive stuff. But then in public, you said you wouldn’t stand for it. That only leaves one option for me in public, to back off and let you do it.”
She blinked. It was logical. She had said that she didn’t want him doing the dominating thing in public, so that forced him in the other direction. Of course, he didn’t even think about the middle ground, but that was a guy for you. “Okay...that’s partly right.”
He waited for her to explain.
“I guess it’s my fault. I did say that I wouldn’t go for the forward stuff in public. That still stands. Do you not like going in the other direction? With me coming after you?”
He shook his head. “No. I like it fine. It’s fucking sexy.”
“Then why the hell don’t you say something while we’re in private?”
“I thought you only wanted the one way.”
“What gave you that impression?”
“I have no idea,” he admitted.
“Well, like I said. Two-way street.”
“Don’t blame me. You never said anything either.”
That was very true. “Yeah, I guess it’s my fault too. We have really shitty communication.”
“Which is surprising, considering how vocal you are.”
She took a moment to get the joke. “Hey!” She smacked his knee and he broke into a smile.
“Well, it’s true.”
She rolled her eyes. “Whatever.”
“Don’t worry.” He leaned down to kiss her neck lightly. “I like it when you scream.”
“What a coincidence.” She smiled. “So do I.”
T
hey arrived at the hotel as planned, when Beck’s father’s function was already going in full force. Beck took the small bag he had packed for them and left it in the foyer with everyone else’s coats and jackets.
Beck paused before going into the doors. “Remember. We’re love struck teenagers. We have to make it believable.”
Carmondy nodded. “Got it.”
He grabbed her hand and led her in. His hand was big and warm but she could almost feel his nervousness through the touch.
She squeezed his palm reassuringly before lacing their fingers together.
Beck’s father was standing just inside the entrance of the room, greeting people as they came in.
When he saw them, he waved them over. He surveyed Beck quickly but took more time on her. Once he was satisfied with looking at her, he turned to his son. “Who’s this?”
She could hear the tightness in Beck’s voice as he spoke. “Dad, this is Carmondy Hamilton, my girlfriend.”
“Girlfriend?”
“Yes.”
“About damn time.”
Beck didn’t respond.
“And who is she exactly?” Carmondy didn’t know what he meant.
“She’s standing right here, Dad. You can ask her yourself.”
His dad just frowned at him though.
“Her father owns Hamilton Power Sports. It’s a chain of power-sports stores.”
“Oh, I know your father,” he said, and Carmondy suddenly remembered that her own dad had said they’d been involved in a court battle.
The older man assessed her some more until he finally seemed to be finished. The look on his face told her that she was acceptable, but not ideal. It was the stupidest thing ever, as if financial standing and looks were the only things that mattered. Beck had warned her about this, she just hadn’t thought it’d be this ridiculous.
“We’re going in now,” Beck said.
“Go say hello to your mother,” Beck’s father said before he turned to someone else who had arrived.
Beck kept a hold of her hand as they entered the room. There was a band playing quietly on the small stage. It sounded like elevator music. People were mostly just milling around, eating, drinking and talking. She wasn’t sure what she had expected, but this seemed pretty boring.
Beck spotted his mom and they headed in that direction, waiting until she was finished talking.
She finally turned to them. “It’s about time,” she snapped. Her hands went to his silver tie, tightening and straightening it, even though it had been perfect already.
“Hi, Mom.” He twitched his neck a little as if he wanted to loosen the tie, but didn’t touch it. “This is Carmondy, my girlfriend.”
The older woman surveyed her, much like her husband had. “When did you get a girlfriend?”
“A couple weeks ago.”
His mother had the same look as his father. Carmondy was acceptable but not ideal. “Just don’t embarrass your father and me, all right?”
He nodded and his mom left without another word.
She glanced up at Beck but his face was emotionless. Carmondy made sure his mother wasn’t looking before reaching up and adjusting his tie back to how it was, leaving him room to breathe.
“Thanks,” he mumbled, taking her hand again.
“No problem. So what do we do now?”
“Just hang out, pretty much. People will want to chat with us. We just have to be polite, pretend like we’re enjoying ourselves and we’re infatuated with each other. If my dad doesn’t fall for it, well...you know. Plus, he won’t let us leave early either.”
“We’ll make it believable,” she assured him. “Is there anyone you know that we should go say hello to?”
He sighed and seemed to come back into himself. “Yeah, probably. Let’s get this over with.”
She smiled and he led her around to several people, mostly older or middle-aged couples. He introduced her as his girlfriend. Some were nice, others weren’t. When they learned what her father did, they gave her the same look that she had gotten from his parents.
Beck was good at playing the part of an academically dedicated teenager. He talked about his grades, schools he supposedly wanted to go to and he even talked sports to some. He seemed to know what to talk about to which people.
She took a backseat on this part and just watched him.
She found the ordeal easier to cope with than she had thought. The part that she was having trouble with was the way Beck was treating her.
He was really playing the part, treating her like a girlfriend. He would hold her hand, put an arm around her, keep her close, offer her food and drinks, and even give her chaste kisses on the cheek or forehead when he introduced her.