Full Count (The Catcher Series Book 1) (14 page)

            “Is that really a good idea, Bianca?” she questions,
clearly trying to convince me that it
’
s not.

            “I always have great ideas,” I chuckle. There
’
s numerous times over the summer when I wanted to get out of my
house for one reason or another that I called or texted Chase to do something,
and we hung out in downtown Hinsdale, at the park, or at his house. In the
beginning it wasn
’
t anything more than him rescuing me
from what I thought was a shitty situation, but gradually some sparks started
to fly - mostly because we may or may not have started making out whenever
things got super awkward. It was better than staring at each other from across
the room.

            But I know Tiffany agrees more with our boys than me
on this.

            “You
’
ve been hanging out with
him a lot,” she tries to casually accuse me of being a stupid girl and a bad
friend.

            “I have not. I went to the movies with you and Bay
last weekend for my birthday,”
I argue.
“I only hang out
with him when you
’
re busy.” This is one hundred percent
true, but she happens to be busy quite often. She babysat a lot over the
summer, and she hangs out with Chloe, one of the girls from our Rockettes team.
Skyler and Tiffany used to be my two outlets, and they balanced each other
well, but… I had to find a replacement for Skyler. By default, I chose Chase. 

             “Hey, it
’
s me,” I say to Chase
when I call him. Tiffany and I are still in my bedroom; I refuse to go back
downstairs without a new wave of confidence, and I decide to try to get it from
Chase whether or not he shows up.

             “We
’
re on that kind of basis
already?” he teases with a chuckle.

             “Your phone has caller ID. Don
’
t
be a jerk,” I snicker. Tiffany sits on my bed as I pace back and forth
nervously. I can
’
t believe I
’
m about
to ask Chase Morgan to come to a family dinner at my house with my brother and
Skyler present.

             “What
’
s up?
”
he asks me. My mind fights with my racing heart on whether or not I should ask
him to do this for me.
Why did I think I would get confidence from talking
to Chase? He makes me nervous as hell.

             “I need a favor, and you can say no,” I begin,
taking a deep breath.

             “What is it, Bianca?” he stops me from rambling
further.

             “My parents invited everyone over for dinner tonight
for my birthday without checking with me, of course, and I
’
m
just not ready to be with Sky and my brother by myself,” I explain. I try
ignoring the crack in my voice, but Tiffany definitely hears it because she
’
s laughing, which means Chase heard it, too.

             “Is Tiff there with you?” he wonders, and I hear
some shuffling in the background.

             “Yeah.”
He doesn
’
t
want to come. Don
’
t ask him.
“You know
what? It
’
s fine. Never mind,” I decide. I need to deal
with this on my own
.

             “
Just ask me,
” Chase demands. I
pause for a long moment, playing a game of tug-o-war in my head.
You don
’
t need him! You can face these guys without him… Yeah,
but you
’
re going to be miserable the entire
time. If Chase is there, Skyler won
’
t
approach you and make a scene.

             “Willyoucomeoverfordinner?” I quickly ask him,
closing my eyes so I can
’
t see Tiffany
’
s
judgmental
look.
“You don
’
t have to-”

             “Bianca!” he exclaims.

             “What? I
’
m sorry. I shouldn
’
t have asked,” I sigh, realizing I forgot to breathe in the
last ten seconds. I feel so stupid for asking him to come into my drama-filled
life. He
’
s my escape; I shouldn
’
t
bring him into the mess.

             “I
’
ll be there in ten minutes,”
he tells me when I finally stop running my mouth.

             “What?” I gasp. “You will?”

             “Yes. See you soon,” he calmly says and then hangs
up.

14 Skyler Swanson

Our parents are totally clueless regarding the tension between
all of us kids, so none of us can create a good enough excuse to get out of
going to Buzz
’
s family birthday dinner. I figure it might
be an appropriate time to make up with her anyways; we haven
’
t fucking spoken in weeks. She
’
s been
avoiding me at all costs, literally. After that weekend I also haven
’
t talked to or hung out with Makenna, but I never had the
chance to tell Buzz that because I ended up grounded for two weeks and she
never wants to talk to me again. My dad had smelled the alcohol on my breath
and found the empty water bottles in the basement bathroom. I honestly didn
’
t fucking care that I was grounded. Buzz didn
’
t
want to talk to me, and I was pissed at Alex for making things shitty between
us. After my grounding I gave up on being mad at Alex, but Buzz isn
’
t as forgiving.

            My mom announces Buzz
’
s presence
as she walks downstairs and we see her from the deck, but then Buzz turns
around and goes back upstairs. What the fuck was that? She hates me that much?

             “Have you talked to her?” Benny whispers while Alex
goes to grab a serving plate for his dad who
’
s on the
grill. I shake my head silently. “You didn
’
t even wish her
a happy birthday?”

             “I texted her. She didn
’
t
answer. She won
’
t fucking talk to me unless it
’
s about baseball,” I admit before walking away towards the
pool. I can
’
t handle listening to Benny badger me,
especially when I see him sneaking glances at Baylee from across the yard. When
I walk away from him it
’
s actually worse because he leaves
to be next to her, but there
’
s nothing I can do. I sit in
a lawn chair while Allen cooks us steaks and everyone
’
s
conversations revolve around anything but the guest of honor.

            About fifteen minutes later I can smell that the food
is just about ready, but as soon as Buzz walks out the back door with Chase
Morgan attached to her arm, I
’
m nauseous. I completely
lose my appetite. The worst part is that she isn
’
t even
faking her smile. She
’
s genuinely happy to have him here.
I never thought I
’
d live to see this day. Everyone greets
him as if he
’
s a fucking lifelong friend of ours. Everyone
except for me. I honestly just pretend he isn
’
t even here. He
’
s wearing a backwards
baseball hat like he
’
s mimicking me, and it
’
s
pissing me the fuck off. I can
’
t stop looking at Buzz.
After a while this makes me notice that she changed her outfit from when she
first came outside and my mom announced her arrival. She looked like Buzz in
her sports attire. Now she looks like… Bianca, a teenage girl who
’
s
starting to grow up. I
’
m pretty sure she has some makeup
on her eyes, and even though she
’
s just in a tank top with
a little jacket over it, it still shows off her female enhancements. Those
short shorts she
’
s started wearing in casual settings like
this make her legs look so much longer and model-like compared to when she
wears athletic shorts. Girl
’
s going to give me a fucking
heart attack. She randomly makes eye contact with me across the table, but
Chase fucking Morgan always seems to notice and try to steal her attention
back.

             “Are we ready to sing?” Beth asks in her high
pitched voice. She went inside the house and comes back with a white cake
covered in sprinkles, which makes me roll my eyes so hard they almost get stuck
like that. How does she still not fucking know her own daughter? I think she
thinks Buzz doesn’t like cake at all, so she just orders what she wants. So.
Annoying.

            As soon as we finish singing, I step away from the
table to go inside and find ice cream for Buzz, just like I do at every family
birthday party. I put two scoops of vanilla ice cream into a bowl and then open
the pantry to see if they have any Oreos. After digging through a shelf of
snacks, I find a package of Oreos that I take a few cookies from to crush up
and sprinkle on her ice cream. When I come back outside there
’
s
a piece of cake sitting in front of Buzz and a fake smile plastered on her
face. How civil of her to act like she wants it just because Chase fucking
Morgan is sitting next to her.

            I set the ice cream next to the cake and lean over to
whisper in her ear, “Happy birthday, sweetheart.” My lips brush her ear ever so
slightly, and I feel the surge of electricity running between us. I swear she
tries to shove a chill out of her spine.

            Chase
’
s dumbfounded expression
proves that I won today, and I will always win. He has no idea that she isn
’
t going to eat the cake in front of her. He doesn
’
t
fucking know Buzz the way I do and he never will. And she knows it, too. The
way her lips turn upward when my Cookies and Fucking Cream ice cream sits in
front of her makes me crack a small grin myself. Usually I can and will hide my
joyful pride, but I want her to know that I like seeing her happy. I also want
Chase to know his place in all of this, which is across town or across the
country for all I fucking care.

            Eventually everyone disperses from the table, and
that
’
s when I catch Buzz alone. She
’
s
going to rinse out her bowl in the kitchen, and I follow her inside.

             “You didn
’
t have to do that,” she
tells me while keeping her eyes on the sink.

             “I always do that for you,” I remind her. “And as
fucking cliche as it is, I
’
m always here for you. So when
Chase fucks you over, I
’
ll be there.”

             “Not if Benny and Rex have anything to say about it,”
she mutters. Her hands are clenched onto the bowl as she sets it in the sink
but doesn
’
t release it.

             “They won
’
t get to say anything
about it. They don
’
t dictate my life,” I explain as she
discharges the bowl and spoon from her hand, letting them angrily clank
together.

             “Yet Rex
made
you bring someone on the Fourth
of July weekend,” she states.
Fuck, so he did dictate that weekend.

             “Yeah, and never again,” I promise, more to myself
than to her.

             “Did you play the Sandlot Night Game?” she asks
without looking at me, but I see the pain in her eyes. With everything that
’
s happened, I
’
m glad
that she is so pissed at Alex and Benny, too, that she hasn
’
t
asked them about the night game that should
’
ve been held
two months ago. It means I
’
m not the only one being
ignored.

             “No. It was the first year it didn
’
t happen,
” I enlighten her. It wasn
’
t even
mentioned that weekend with Leah and Makenna there in the absence of Buzz and
Tiffany.

            She turns to walk away from the sink, and
subsequently me, but I step in front of her. “Can I please fucking talk to you?”

             “Not now,” she kindly denies me, still refusing to
look at me. She
’
s fucking killing me. Can
’
t
she see how I feel about her when I look at her? God, I just want her, no one
else. Romantic or not doesn
’
t matter to me at this point;
I just need her back in my life.

             “You
’
ve been avoiding me all
summer. I can
’
t fucking stand this,” I argue, grabbing her
shoulders to square them to me. I dip down so my eyes meet hers while her head
is lowered. She
’
s anxious as fuck already and refuses to
meet me halfway. “Bianca!” I shout. “Look at me!”

            I think that is the first time I
’
ve
ever called her by her real first name, and it scares the fucking shit out of
her. I watch as her eyes bulge out like she
’
s a fish
trying to swim away from a shark. They nervously cross my line of vision and
dart away, but eventually she rests them somewhere on my face - not my eyes. I
take it.

             “What?” she mumbles in a trembling voice.

             “I need you to know that I didn
’
t
fucking do anything with her,” I begin. I loosen my hold on her shoulders but
only enough for her to relax, not to fucking run away from me like she
’
s probably thinking. “All we did was drink. I was sleeping on
the couch - alone - and she decided to be a fucking bitch and try to get me to
sleep next to her. But it never happened.”

             “
We weren
’
t
together. You don
’
t owe me an explanation,” she mutters,
finally lifting her head, which is ironic because I
’
m
pretty sure she feels defeated.

             “It doesn
’
t matter if we were
together or not. I didn
’
t mean to hurt you. I didn
’
t want her there; I wanted you to fucking be there and make
that horrible weekend bearable,” I whine, taking a step closer to her so I can
embrace her in my arms. She feels limp at first, but after a reluctant moment
she reciprocates the gesture. “I
’
m sorry, B. And I hope I
can make it up to you.”

             “I
’
m with Chase… well, kind of,”
she confesses as her chin digs into my hard chest. That declaration makes me
want to fume, but she and I are finally speaking again so I hold back. I wonder
if she
’s just
“with” him to get back at me or if it
’
s going to be something real. Has she really lost all feelings
for me? I can
’
t read her signals anymore, and I hate it.

             “Just fucking be careful. And remember, I
’
m always here,” I remind her, as much as it kills me to just
let it happen. I know he will hurt her, but there
’
s
nothing I can do to stop him. She
’
ll hate me more than I
sort of hate Alex for not letting
us
be together; I have to let her make
her own mistakes.

            The week after Buzz
’
s birthday
dinner is the homecoming dance,
Buzz
’
s first
homecoming dance. I convince Benny to go
solo with me so we don
’
t have to worry about entertaining
girls all night. Alex is whipped as fuck and is obviously going with Leah and
all of her friends, but Benny and I skip pictures with them. My main purpose
for wanting to go stag is so that I can watch out for Buzz without someone
nagging at me to dance all night.

            When we arrive at school for the dance, I scan the
room for Buzz and don
’
t see her yet. Since Benny
’
s love interest is fucking twelve years old and therefore not
invited to attend the dance, the two of us hang out in the back of the
cafeteria as we wait for Alex and the rest of our friends to join us.

            Alex and Leah walk through the doors followed by Leah
’
s posse, and a large group trails behind them. That
’
s when I see her. Buzz has on a short baby blue dress with one
strap over her shoulder. It
’
s way too fucking short and
revealing for my liking, and I have a hard time believing that
’
s
what she wore when she left the house. There
’
s no way
Allen or Alex would let her leave looking like that. She doesn
’
t
look slutty; fuck, she looks gorgeous and stunning. I just don
’
t
want her looking like a model while standing next to Chase Morgan. I don
’
t like the way his eyes are falling on her. He appears to be
almost genuine until Buzz turns her back to him and he pretends to smack her
ass a few times before giving his douchey friend next to him a high five.

             “Stop staring,” Benny suggests, nudging me out of my
trans.

             “Tell me you saw that,” I demand, whipping my head
and demon eyes at him.

             “I was too busy trying to get your attention,” he
replied. “What did I miss?” He glances across the cafeteria at Buzz and Chase
who are now sidled up next to each other. “Oh, that.” We both stare intently at
them as his hand slides to her hip. I breathe in exaggeratedly hard like I
’
m suffocating and my only release is to beat Chase
’
s ass. I take a step forward until Benny
’
s
arm hits me across my chest. “
Look, I don
’
t
like that anymore than you do, but you can
’
t go all King
Kong on her.”

             “God knows the fucking things he wants to do to her,”
I mutter, obliging to Benny
’
s suggesting gesture. I can
’
t even imagine hating someone more than I hate Chase Morgan
right now. I can tell from fifty feet away he
’
s only
interested in Buzz
’
s body; all he
’
s
doing is groping her with his eyes. “I can
’
t do this.”