Forever summer (Summer # 4) (13 page)

“You know that you’re going to look at the menu and order a pot and a parmi anyway, right?” Tammy mused.

“Well, yeah, that’s true,” Toby conceded.

Tammy laughed. “I’ll go put your order in.”

Wait, what? She was leaving me? Abandoning me to be with Toby alone to face the myriad of questions about what I was doing here.

He would be suspicious straight away. There would be no way of me being here without Tess not knowing and therefore him not knowing; it just wasn’t possible.

Tammy paused halfway through the sliding door, “Oh, Ellie, by the way, Toby knows,” she said, a huge smile spread across her face as she winked at Toby.

“Knows?”

“I know.”

I tried to grab Tammy’s attention but she was long gone toward the kitchen. I was going to kill her.

I shifted uneasily in my chair. Was this a case of entrapment? “Know what, exactly?” I asked innocently.

Toby dragged out the chair next to me. “The very same reason you’re here, I’m sure.” He sat down, stretching out his legs, still clad in his navy work pants that were covered in grease and oil, the burden all mechanics must bear.

“For a pot and parmi?”

“Well, that, no doubt, and a certain surprise engagement party.”

I should have visibly sagged in relief that he knew, that I didn’t have to worry about keeping up the façade and be on anyone’s shit list for being discovered by one of the guests of honour. I blamed my sceptical heart. Was it common knowledge that Toby knew?

“H-how…”

“Do I know?”

“Ah, yeah.”

“Sean has always had this inability to keep secrets from me.” Toby linked his hands behind his head, stretching and yawning. “Plus, it was kind of my idea.”

“Wait, the party?”

“Initially, I mentioned it ages ago and then when Sean said he and Amy were going to throw us an engagement party I jumped at it. Tess has been driving herself mad stressing about work and the thought of planning the engagement, so I’ve kind of taken the initiative.” Toby looked proud.

There was a sudden heaviness in my heart. My best friend had been struggling, stressed beyond belief and I hadn’t even noticed. I was too busy worrying about my own ridiculous problems.

“Well, at least I don’t have to stress about you blowing my cover,” I said, playfully nudging Toby’s foot.

“No chance, you’re my wild card. Tess hasn’t a clue you’re around and I want to keep it that way. She’ll probably be more excited about seeing you than the actual surprise party itself.”

I smiled, taking in the underlying level of stress Toby was emitting as he rubbed at the stubble of his jawline. He looked as though he had had a few sleepless nights to boot.

“You’re a good man, Toby Morrison, Tess is going to love it.”

“I hope so, otherwise there might not be a wedding,” he joked.

“It’s Tess, not me. I’m the diva of the group, remember?”

“Actually, I always kind of pegged Adam as the diva.”

“Well, clearly.” I smiled, thinking how completely and utterly true that was. I had a moment of weakness as I looked at Toby, thinking maybe I could ask him about what was going on with Adam, but in the same instance I shook the thought from my mind with how completely neurotic I was being about a brotherly blow out. Maybe I had simply removed myself from the drama of Onslow from being away for a few months. I had even thought it best not to broach the subject with Tammy, which was just as well, seeing as our intimate girls’ luncheon had now officially been gate-crashed by Toby.

Chapter Fifteen

Late in the afternoon the hotel was abuzz with excitement as the reality neared of the pending top-secret engagement party. This was it, this was the real deal. No dress rehearsal: this was the weekend of all weekends. And Sean had thought of everything, with the aid of some impressive accomplices, beginning with Tess’s mum who had taken Tess out of town for the day to minimise potential interference. It was like a grand-scale black ops mission. There were buses that had been hired from the local RSL club to escort people out to the lake house, a house band, caterers (not Tess’s parents) were all lined up, as well as fireworks.

I couldn’t help but feel a little in awe of all the excitement and the lengths everyone was going to in order to make the party the best it could be. How could I have possibly snubbed my town for suffering from small-town syndrome with such deeply touching displays of camaraderie? I couldn’t help but feel pangs of jealousy at how lucky Tess was and could only hope someday I would be as happy as her.

I leant back, resting my elbows on top of the picnic table, sunglasses saving me from the glare of the afternoon sun as I sipped on my coke and took great pleasure in watching Adam helping Chris load up his van with slabs of beer. There was something very rewarding about watching hot boys sweat it out; it was certainly a lot more appealing than them threatening to kill one another. They worked with silent determination, mainly because they were under the pump to keep the goods cold and stacked onto ice. I felt kind of ridiculous making such a big deal about this morning’s interaction. I tried not to think about the fact Adam was keeping something from me; ignorance really was bliss.

Adam had come back from the lake house throwing me a cheeky wink and a grin like the Adam of old. I merely saluted him with my drink and felt the edge of giddiness somersault in my tummy having spotted him making his way across the drive.

The very same feeling that now returned in this instance of seeing him make his way over to me now. Lifting up the edge of his T-shirt and wiping his brow and exposing the taut, tanned skin underneath. I had never been more grateful in that moment to be wearing sunnies as I let my eyes linger.

Without a word Adam stood before me, momentarily blocking the sun and taking my Coke from my grasp and taking a big thirsty swig as he moved to sit next to me, smacking his lips together in appreciation as he passed me back my drink.

Don’t think about the fact that his lips have been on my drink. His gorgeous, kissable…

“Thanks.”

“All done?”

“Pretty much. You should see Sean’s place, it’s like the circus has come to town.”

I raised my brows, thinking of scary clowns and popcorn; surely not.

“Don’t look so horrified, it’s a classy affair. No clowns.”

I laughed. “Always reading my mind.”

“Ah, yes, but can you read my mind?”

“I like to think so.”

“Okay, what am I thinking now then?” Adam mirrored my pose, resting his elbows on the picnic table.

“You’re thinking, how drunk am I going to get Ellie tonight, and I can’t wait to tear up the dance floor with her with our mad skills.”

Adam broke out into a brilliant grin; it was by far one of my most favourite features. It was the kind of smile that was contagious, the kind that lifted your spirits.

“Well, that’s a given. That’s the aim at every party, so I wouldn’t call it actual mind reading.”

“Okay, so let me try again,” I said, twisting around to face him directly, lifting up my sunnies and studying his face intently, like I was some kind of psychic trying to tell his fortune.

Adam looked at me expectantly, waiting with great interest on what I could possibly say. It was a moment that had begun with great confidence and an air of fun, but when I looked at Adam, really looked at him, his deep dark eyes that locked with mine, slightly creased with a glimmer of humour, I found it very difficult to think or to hurry in any way. I didn’t want to break away from his stare, to come back to reality.

“You’re thinking,” I started, pausing so as to slow down time a little. “You’re thinking …” I repeated, struggling to concentrate, even more so when Adam’s smile returned at seeing me struggle to form the words. It was a smile that switched something on inside me, a new steely determination to take this more seriously. The typical pull and push of our personalities: the more he pushed the more determined I became.

He leaned into me, smirking an incredibly infuriating smirk. “Well?”

“Just hang on a minute, your skull is thick and very hard to penetrate.”

“Admit it, I’m a vault and you can’t crack it.”

“Oh, please, you are nothing if not predictable, Adam Henderson.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

“Then.” Adam slid across the bench until his shoulder touched mine, folding his arms across his chest. “What. Am. I. Thinking?”

I didn’t know what he was thinking, because all I could think about was the feel of his skin against mine, the absolute burn of him touching me. I had felt it a million times before. There’s never been any real feeling of personal space with us, we just were, existed with an invisible string that connected us, or a rubber band that if you allowed too much friction we would undoubtedly come springing back to one another. The only difference now was every touch, every smile, every glimpse meant something to me. It fed the desire in me for more, a dangerous feeling fuelled by the boy who breathed in and out in the same rhythm as me, I swear it. We were the same—a connection that no one could deny with all the jokes and snide couple comments—but the truth was, we belonged to one another. Two misfits floating from scene to scene, doing shots, tearing up dance floors, fighting each other’s battles and picking up the pieces. I may not have had an actual clue to pinpoint what he was thinking in that very moment, but I knew enough to know that he was the boy, and he belonged to me.

Seconds, hell, maybe even minutes passed; I couldn’t be sure with my wandering thoughts, but I opted for just whatever came to mind.

“You’re thinking, I hope I don’t get splinters in my arse,” I said, eyeing the sun-beaten picnic bench he had just slid across.

Adam burst out laughing; it was so loud and sudden I flinched.

“Yep, that is exactly what I was thinking. You nailed it.”

“Really?” I asked, astonished I actually got it right.

“No!” He laughed.

I threw my hands up. “Fine, you win. What are you thinking?”

Adam’s laughter died down. His composure seemed somewhat sober as he reconnected with my eyes again, but the crooked little curve to his mouth remained as he shook his head.

“I’ll never tell.”

I sighed, my gaze narrowing in a mock fury as I shook my head. “And to think I tell you everything.”

Except that I am madly in love with you.

Adam’s mood shifted, and I was worried that maybe he could freakishly read my mind. But his mood was different somehow; he looked pained, blinking and looking out toward where the lake shimmered under the summer sun.

“Yeah, that’s what friends do, yeah?”

But it was a question he voiced almost to himself; I didn’t feel like I had the right to press him further. The mood had definitely shifted, to something awkward, and the Adam next to me seemed reminiscent of a stranger once more. I felt the old panic rise in me again. What was going on? What was causing Adam to shut down into this unrecognisable being? It pained me, more to the point that he wasn’t telling me something, and worst of all he knew it. The mere mention of honesty and I could hear the cogs of deep thought turning in his head, and it frightened me, beyond belief.

Adam kept his eyes affixed in the opposite direction. He sat slightly away from me now, and that left me feeling cold and distant just in the sudden change of his body language.

I had had enough. I didn’t need to have girl-only lunches with Tammy or interrogate Toby to find out what was happening with my best friend: I would simply ask him myself.

“A-Adam I—”

But before I could finish, Adam shouted, “Look out, here’s trouble.” My eyes followed to where he was waving to an approaching figure, stepping across the grass toward us. I flicked my sunglasses down to disguise the uncontrollable scowl I had that was burning in the direction of Megsy closing the distance before us. I don’t know what I hated more: her unexpected appearance or the clear change in Adam’s demeanour in her presence.

If we were in a movie she would be making her way over in slow motion, flicking her hair over her shoulder as a Whitesnake song played in the background. I thought I was going to be ill.

Cutesy Megsy winced as she sidled up next to Adam. “Am I too early?”

“No, of course not,” Adam reassured, installing instant relief in her.

Blech.

I hid my pained smile behind my Coke bottle that I raised to my lips, sipping on the now hot and rather flat drink, thinking it exactly how I felt.

Hot and flat.

Never in all my years had I ever been made to feel like a third wheel; I was always amongst it, confident in my ability to be a part of the gang. If anything, I was the one that would make others feel like the third wheel. But in this case I felt like the odd one out; well, fuck that, I thought. Not this little black duck. Even though Megsy had done nothing more than walk across the lawn and stand before us there was no way she was edging her way back into Adam’s heart, with her cutesy little fringe and funky alternative fashion, the only kind that she could carry off with her ankle boots and suede mini. She was as adorable as ever and if I were a boy I would totally be crushing on her too, and that simply killed me.

“So, do you need any more help?” I asked Adam, trying to seem like a Good Samaritan here. Adam seemed a bit taken aback, which kind of made sense. ‘Helping’ wasn’t exactly my thing, but it was for Tess so I would definitely make an exception, plus I had no doubt that Megsy would be offering to apply cold compresses to the boys’ heads and serve them up cold drinks if she could, she was just that type of person.

“Nah, I think we’re actually sorted, just be ready by six for the pickup.”

“That I can do,” I said, relieved that he didn’t want me to make a salad or anything that would interrupt my getting-ready time. I glanced at my watch, hardly believing that it was four o’clock already. I was going to need every minute of those two hours to make myself into head-turning ready; actually, I didn’t really care if any did, I just wanted one head to turn.