Forbidden (16 page)

I smile dreamily until I realize it has become quiet again. Michael is waiting for me to answer an unheard question. “Uh.”

“Weren’t you listening?” he demands.

“No, Michael!” I explode on reflex. I’m not listening! Not until you give me some answers!”

My reaction was so quick and violent that I practically scared myself.
Maybe anger will keep me on track and stop my body from reacting to his
.

Michael slams the paper down and leans over me, bracing his hands on each side of my head. He stares down, his eyes blazing. “What are you looking for, Sophia?” he asks coldly. I flinch and press myself deeper into the ground. It’s not fear of Michael but the closeness of him that’s disturbing. His face is inches above mine and his warm breath is fanning my cheeks. I feel a shivering sensation ripple through me, making my legs tremble.

“I … just want to know what’s been happening around here, that’s all. I’ve seen some strange things—”

“Like what?”

“Are you kidding?” My mouth stops working because words won’t form fast enough. I have to look away since I can’t think with him so close, staring so intently.

“You … you know exactly what I’m talking about, Michael. You can start with that grungy guy,”

“Who?”

“That guy who ran into your fist three times at the accident. The one who showed up tonight and set you off. Who is he? Why do you hate him?”

Michael has a predatory look that conveys his feelings for the guy. “Okay, Sophia. Let’s make a deal. You like to make deals, don’t you?”

I don’t know what he means by that but I say, “Well, okay. Like what?”

“I answer
all
your questions and you answer just one of mine. Deal?”

Michael has a feral look in his eyes, the hunter baiting the trap. I should be intimidated but, honestly, it’s sexy as hell and I wish I could—

No, no, no. Stay focused. Concentrate
.

My thoughts scatter and I’m at a disadvantage. Again, I wonder what he can possibly want to know from me.

“Well?” he pushes, and I take the bait.

“Okay, you answer first.”

“My
question
first,” he corrects with a challenge.

I grit my teeth. “Fine! I answer
one
question and you answer
all
of mine! Go!”

Michael leans closer, pressing his chest against my side. He looks deep into my eyes and whispers in a seductive voice that sends shivers down to my toes.

“Where is your scar, Sophia?”

Uh-oh. I flounder in panic. It’s the one question I can’t answer.

“That’s not fair. I can’t answer that.” My voice is shaking, a residual effect from the shivers he created.

“Can’t or won’t?”

“Either … both! I don’t have an answer.”

“Well then, neither do I.” Michael reclines onto his back, tucking an arm under his head. He is smug and satisfied.

I lay quietly for a moment, trying to catch my breath. Both heartbeats are raging with … well, I don’t know what. Anger? Frustration? Arousal?

Arousal? Holy shit! Where did that come from?

I close my eyes as though considering this in darkness will make it less true.
This is so unfair!
Not only is Michael Patronus the most complicated and stubborn guy
around, he is also the hottest guy I’ve ever seen.

And oh how he makes my blood boil; anger or arousal, it hardly seems to matter, now does it?

I sit up and take my turn to stare and make demands. “Well, why don’t
you
tell me what happened to my scar, Mr. Knowitall? I am open to any and all theories. Since you seem to know so … much … about …”

Michael is slowly rising up like a smoldering volcano. His eyes lock with mine and I am forced down by the heat of his glare. Flat on my back again, Michael is hovering and infuriated. I imagine he evokes fear in others but I am dissolving under intense blue eyes,
chocolate in the melting pot
. The intimacy of his gaze, his hard body pressed next to mine, lay my emotions bare. I feel exposed, my chest pumping up and down as both heartbeats thunder with hypnotic rhythm. I stare in wonder as delicious sensations ripple through me. And then it happens; the tightness around Michael’s eyes fades and his anger slowly ebbs like a tide. He lowers himself to his elbows, bringing his chest against mine. His eyes are hands caressing my face, provoking tingles along my skin. A warm blanket unfurls inside me, and I am safe. Unfamiliar ideas sprinkle like thoughts of rain in my mind:
There are questions I should not ask, answers I should not hear, things I should not know
.

There is uncertainty in Michael’s pale blue eyes and it guides his finger to gently caress the scar that isn’t. He contemplates, letting his finger trail along my cheek and tuck a strand of hair behind my ear. Black lashes hide his eyes as he stares at my mouth. His lips part in anticipation. My breathing retracts, and I want to cup his cheek and draw him closer but I’m afraid to move, afraid to spoil the moment.

“What do you want most, Sophia?” Michael whispers, bringing sweet, warm breath to play with my lips. My eyes droop, and a spark of awareness ignites in my head.
He asks the same question I begged of Mom. The same question I beg of myself
. I am falling too far into him to let the spark grow into suspicion.

“I don’t know, Michael.” I sigh. “I think I want so much, it’s not fair to ask.” His fingers trace my jaw, tenderly, like he is afraid I’ll break. He is full of curiosity, as though he’s never touched anyone like this before. The tugging in my chest grows stronger, and the second heartbeat swells until I’m sure he can hear it.

“Tell me.” His voice is a feather across my skin. His fingers slide cautiously through my hair, unaccustomed to the intimacy. With his warm body pressed against mine, I’d like nothing more than to snuggle into the safety of his shadow.

“I want … freedom.” I grab the first word drifting by.

Michael hesitates with concern. “Freedom? Are you bound by something?” His
voice is soft but with an edge of lingering suspicion. He is still searching for his answer. His eyes take mine like we’re holding hands, and I am no longer me but joined with him. I open myself, giving up my secrets like a gift.

“I want freedom from the guilt in my dad’s eyes. I want freedom from the sadness of my mom’s memory. I want light in darkness. I want truth without wings, to stay put. I want to know love by his smile … I want …”
I want to know how your lips feel on mine
.

Michael’s breathing is labored, and his hand trembles on my cheek. His eyes are heavy and focused on my mouth. I feel his curiosity. He is wondering what it’s like to kiss me. His thumb traces my bottom lip and his eyes follow the path. When he looks at me again, I gasp. His eyes are a watercolor of pale blue churning darker. They are cobalt.

“Michael!” I whisper, and cup his cheek. “Your eyes are … getting darker!”

Rage flashes in Michael’s eyes and he jerks away, leaving me with an airless, empty feeling. He pushes to his knees, his body rigid, coiled for attack. I search his face, but he averts his eyes.

“What’s happening?” I demand. “Michael, please!”

He spins around and grabs my arms in a fit of rage. The slightest pressure and he could snap them like twigs. He yanks me to my knees, and I grimace in pain. His eyes are blazing cobalt and his face is a mask of fury.

“Who sent you?” he yells, and I stare in disbelief as his eyes churn into translucent marbles full of anger and energy. He shakes me when I don’t answer. “Tell me!”

“What?” I cry out. “I don’t know what you’re talking about!” Fear claws at my insides. Michael is wild and frantic for something I can’t give. He could break me without a second thought, and I steel myself against his rage.
He won’t hurt me. He is misunderstanding something
. I
am misunderstanding something!

I glare at him. “Michael, stop! What’s the matter? What’s happening?”

He shoves me aside and stands up, yelling down. “No more questions, Sophia! Stay away from me!”

I gape at the untamed rage in him. Rage born out of something beyond tonight. “What’s the matter with you?” I demand, struggling to my feet.

“I said stay away! Do you understand me?” he yells.

I am struck by a bizarre feeling that I am losing something I’m meant to have, and the unfairness lights me like a fuse. I stand toe to toe with him. Despite his obvious physical advantage, we are equal in anger and determination.

“You listen to me, Michael Patronus!” My finger is a weapon in his face. “I’ll stay away from you and you stay away from me!”

“Fine!”

“Fine!”

Chapter 15

Michael

Michael was pacing and muttering and working to control the energy swelling up inside him. His eyes were iridescent and a faint cerulean light surrounded his entire body. He was emitting more power than he’d used on his last soul-saving mission, when he’d saved a ten-year-old boy from drowning.

That girl!
He just left Sophia and couldn’t calm down.

Michael slammed a closet door, shattering it on its hinges. “Damnit!” He picked up a baseball bat and resumed pacing, hands choking the bat. He had already sent his brothers away, demanding time to think alone.
Think?
Ha, what a joke. He was trying to power down before they saw that his energy level was at DEFCON 1. If only he would sense the call and put his energy to work.

Why couldn’t he calm down? What was it about Sophia that triggered his temper, his desire to wring her pretty neck?

His hands clenched and snapped the bat in half.
Okay, no more wood
.

He tossed it aside and replayed the night, poring over everything Sophia did and said. Honestly, it was
his
reaction that bothered him the most, that second heartbeat whenever she was near, and the insane need—
need!
—to touch her. He slid a hand through his hair as though it could hold back the next thought, the truth he had suspected from the moment he first saw Sophia. She had awakened a human emotion that no guardian should ever possess, and it was strong enough to alter his physical composition, strong enough to change his eyes to an unnatural color.

Whenever Michael received the call for help, his spiritual energy accumulated instantaneously like a nitro charge. It helped propel him to the souls in jeopardy. The power literally sucked the color from his eyes, turning them translucent but allowing his vision to penetrate solids, liquids, and darkness.
Never
had his eyes reversed and grown darker.
Never
had he come close to kissing a human.
Never
had he even entertained the idea.

What the hell was he thinking? He could’ve killed her! Right then!

Guardian power was dangerous for humans. A kiss from an angel would pull the air from their lungs and suffocate them. Easily. Humans were delicate beings, requiring
gentle manipulations to sustain life. The realization that he’d come so close to kissing Sophia had sent a shock wave of gut-wrenching fear through him. Not for himself or the repercussions of a guardian killing a Forgiven soul, but he’d had a vision of Sophia’s lifeless body lying in his arms. It had flashed across his eyes so clearly that he thought it had already happened, or soon would. He’d been compelled to push her away just to keep her safe.

Okay, to be fair, before he’d nearly made the mistake of the millennium, Sophia had been asking a lot of questions. She was fishing for something, trying to trip him up. If she’d tricked him, or more likely seduced him like the little vixen that she was, and he revealed his identity, he’d be called before The Council. Not good.

Revealing their identity could send him and his family Home. Permanently. In shame. Souls in Haven Hurst would be left temporarily unprotected, meaning every demon or soul seeker within a hundred miles would rain down on them. The result? People turning on one another and an unimaginable number of lost souls.

When Michael’s eyes had churned from light to dark, what was he supposed to think? He had to believe Gabe was right. Sophia must be a test.

Michael smirked.
More like sacrifice
.

Someone sent Sophia to find his weakness or to provoke one.

“I don’t have a weakness,” he stated with a low confident growl. But Sophia’s face appeared instantly in his mind: that long dark hair, blue-green eyes, and pale skin beneath his fingers. He had liked the way her face flushed as he’d touched her. He’d like the way her body trembled beneath him. He got a thrill knowing he’d caused it. And he had wanted to do more.…

A shiver passed through his stomach and he gasped. His body was responding physically to a human girl.
But how? It should be impossible and yet …

“Damn girl!” He stripped off his clothes and stepped into the shower. Cold water blasted his face, running down his naked chest and arms and legs like chilled fingers.
Fitting punishment
. He braced his hands on the wall and remained there until he was soaked and calm and he heard pounding on the bedroom door.

Gabe was going to have a conniption if he didn’t get some answers.

*  *  *

Downstairs in the living room, Michael finally confessed, most of it, to his family. He revealed choice details about Sophia to his parents, who were not happy to learn that a
human saw him in spirit form. He should’ve reported this earlier.

Michael imagined
all
the bizarre things about Sophia that he should have reported, but wouldn’t. Not yet anyway. He’d become stubborn about it, still wanting to keep some of her secrets for himself.

Not to mention the intimate effect she was having on him.

“What is she?” Michael’s father, Dimitri, asked.

“Human. For sure, only … I don’t know, she could be a test or something.” Michael hesitated, monitoring what to reveal. “It’s hard to get a positive read. I’ve gotten as close to her as possible and, I mean … um—” He stumbled over the private double meaning and felt an unnatural rush of emotions hit him. He worked to mask it before the others sensed it but he didn’t make it.