Flesh & Bone - a contemporary romance: The Minstrel Series #2 (29 page)

“He’s a player,” Annette said with a frown.

Eva choked back bile. She couldn’t believe she’d fallen for his act. She couldn’t believe she’d let him kiss her. “I’m such an idiot.”

“Yeah,” Annette agreed. “So am I.” She took a hesitant step toward Eva and slowly wrapped her arms around her. “Boys suck.”

Tears of relief erupted from Eva’s eyes. “Yes, they do.”

Sebastian finally admitted to himself that working at the soup kitchen in an effort to get close to Eva was a bad idea. Not only was he not able to restore any level of friendship, but his presence had also created a wedge between her and her family. The last thing he wanted to do was to make life harder for her.

After visiting his father in the hospital, Sebastian made a couple calls, and his lawyer was able to arrange a change in venue for his community service. Starting tomorrow he’d be mopping halls at the hospital. At least he’d be able to see his papa each time. The elder Herr Weiss wasn’t doing well. His skin was grey and veiny and he had permanent tubes running from his nose and an IV in his arm.

Sebastian pulled Herr Baumann aside when he arrived to let him know about the change.

Herr Baumann’s bushy eyebrows burrowed to a V. “I’m sorry to hear that you’re leaving us. You’re an excellent worker.” The older man rested a hand on Sebastian’s shoulder and smiled. “I’ve grown fond of you.”

Sebastian laughed. “Likewise. But Eva is uncomfortable with my being here. For her sake I’ve decided to leave.”

“I understand. Her heart… everyone deals with pain and loss in their own way. I’m sure she’ll come around eventually.”

Sebastian wasn’t so sure. At any rate, the plan was in motion and this was his last day at the soup kitchen. He’d miss hanging out with the folks who came in from the cold. He was surprised at how much he actually liked their company, and how good it felt to give back to the community in this way. He couldn’t imagine that working as a janitor at the hospital would have the same rewards.

The time came to unlock the door, and Sebastian waved in the crowd that had formed outside. “Come in, come in. It’s cold out there!” he said with a smile.

He was greeted in return with several choruses of “Hi, Bastian.”

The folks settled into the empty chairs in the room. Some were regulars and claimed the same seats. There were a few new faces. The new ones usually gravitated to the back and avoided eye contact. Sebastian made an extra effort to make them feel comfortable. “Welcome,” he said. “I’m Bastian.” He never introduced himself as Sebastian because he didn’t want to chance that people would make the connection. He heard a guitar strum and assumed it was Jörg getting ready to begin the pre-meal music. His jaw dropped when he turned and saw Eva sitting on the stool. She didn’t look away when their gazes met, and he wondered how long she’d been there, How long she’d been watching him.

Eva hadn’t played once since Sebastian started working there, and he felt more than a little confused as to why she showed up today—especially after their less than friendly meeting the day before.

He expected her to scowl and ignore him, but her eyes were soft and her lips actually hinted at a smile. His heart jerked in his chest as he tried to process.

Herr Baumann opened in prayer and Eva sang a short list of songs he’d recognized from when Jörg played, though Eva’s versions were drastic improvements. Sebastian was mesmerized by her presence on stage and lassoed by her voice. It was customary to applaud after each song and Sebastian didn’t hold back. He felt his lips tug up as he drank her in. She caught him grinning and smiled in return. A real, bona fide smile!

What was going on?

When she finished singing, he approached her tentatively. He clearly remembered her telling him that she didn’t want to see him, but he couldn’t let this opportunity pass.

“Hi,” he said

“Hi.”

“Nice set. I miss hearing you sing.”

She buckled the guitar case shut and looked up at him from under her dark lashes, a move that made his knees quiver. “Thanks. I’ve missed playing.”

She didn’t tell him to shove off, so that was a good sign.

“I’m surprised to see you here,” he added.

“I’m surprised myself.”

Her demeanor was completely altered from the day before. Her eyes were kinder and her lips relaxed.

Sebastian snapped himself back to attention. He had to stop looking at her lips!

“Well, good to see you again,” he said, taking backward steps toward the kitchen.

“Sebastian?”

Sebastian stopped. Eva waved him back and he took the three steps needed to return to her side. “Yeah?”

“I want to apologize for how I treated you yesterday. It was uncalled for and I’m sorry.”

Sebastian scratched his head and gazed back at her, questioningly. “Accepted, though no apology is necessary. I’m the one in need of forgiveness.”

Eva’s eyelids fluttered, and her knuckles whitened as she gripped her cane. “Yes, I’m aware of the situation. You are in need of forgiveness and I am in need of the ability to forgive. It’s not easy, but I want to do it.”

“Thank you, Eva. You can’t know how much that means to me.”

She nodded and grabbed her coat. Sebastian stepped up quickly to help her put it on. He inhaled deeply the scent of her shampoo, thankful that he had one last chance to stand this close to her.

She stiffened slightly at his touch but didn’t pull away. He stepped back, not wanting to push his luck.

“Maybe I’ll see you tomorrow?” she said politely.

Sebastian shook his head. “It’s my last day.”

Eva’s eyes widened with surprise. “I thought you had another six weeks.”

“I do, but I’m serving them at the hospital. That way I can be closer to my father.”

“Oh. Of course. How is he?”

“Not well, but he’s still with us.”

Sebastian sensed her awkwardness. “I should get back to work. Don’t want to slack off on my last day.” He saluted her. “Maybe I’ll see you around.”

Forgiving someone didn’t mean that what they did was okay. When Annette said she forgave Eva, she wasn’t saying what Eva did was okay. Dismissing Annette’s feelings by kissing Xavier wasn’t okay. Just like what Sebastian did by fleeing the scene of an accident would never be okay.

So what did forgiveness mean? Why did Eva care if Annette forgave her or not? Why did Annette extend it? A lot of girls wouldn’t have.

These were things that Eva pondered as she played for the homeless people in the street church. She’d been coming regularly over the last few weeks when her school schedule allowed, and it felt good. She missed singing and performing. She missed playing her guitar.

And she found that she missed Sebastian. Though her time with him at the street church only overlapped once, she could still imagine him standing in the corner, watching her with such intensity it made her feel like gelatin.

For the first time in months, reflecting on Sebastian Weiss didn’t cause a boulder-size lump to swell in her chest. It didn’t make the muscles in her neck tighten until the base of her skull throbbed. It didn’t make her feel like she’d been bound by wire and hung from a line.

Today, when she thought about Sebastian, she felt… light, serene.

Was this what forgiveness did? All this time she thought Sebastian would be the only one to benefit from an offer of forgiveness, but Eva was starting to see that she was the primary benefactor.

She was just about to start her set when the door opened with a blast of cold and Sebastian walked in. Her heart stammered to a stop when he smiled at her with a shy nod. She couldn’t bring herself to smile back.

Some of the regulars recognized him and called him over. “Bastian, we missed you!”

Sebastian shook the hands of each person at the table. “Missed you guys, too.”

Eva wondered why he came. Not to work, obviously. To see the people he’d come to know. To see her?

The feelings swirling through her heart and mind were too complicated to assess in the moment. She closed her eyes and let herself hide in the music. Between songs, she’d peek out, and every single time Sebastian caught her looking at him. The corner of his mouth pulled up to one side and when she finished her last song he winked.

Her papa approached him, and they shook hands and smiled in a relaxed manner Eva never thought she’d see between them in a million years. Sebastian said something that made her papa laugh, and he patted Sebastian on the back.

Eva’s stomach turned to goo. She felt like the world had turned upside down in a day and it made her dizzy. Sebastian stood in line with the homeless and accepted a bowl of soup and a bun. Eva did the same, choosing a seat two tables away. Far enough to not look like she wanted to be near him, but close enough that she could hear what he was saying.

The truth slammed into her. She did want to be near him.

She made polite small talk with a woman at her table who was continually interrupted by two young children. It gave Eva opportunity to eavesdrop on Sebastian. He was listening to a middle-aged man with salt-and-pepper hair tell his life story. Sebastian paid attention like he really cared. Eva believed he did.

Because, she realized, Sebastian was a good person. In many ways, a better one than she.

There was no mistaking that petite form with the stilted gait. Sebastian watched her through the dim light of his flat, standing back far enough from the window that, should she glance up and look, she wouldn’t see him staring down at her.

He wondered where she was going and couldn’t think of any place nearby that would account for her having to take his road to get there. He was more than a little surprised when she stopped in front of his building. She stood there staring at the door and finally reached up and pressed the buzzer.

Though Sebastian knew she had to be there for him, he still jumped at the sound. He sprinted to the button by his door and pressed it.

“Who is it?” he asked, though he knew it was Eva. He didn’t want her to know he’d been watching.

“It’s Eva.”

Sebastian opened the door to his flat and waited for her. He felt pensive yet intrigued. “This is a surprise,” he said. “Come in.”

Eva smiled at him weakly. Her hair was tucked under a cap, and she had a purple scarf around her neck. Her cheeks and nose were rosy red from the early spring chill, and Sebastian had to bite his cheek to keep from grinning at how cute she was.

“Can I take your coat?”

“No, that’s okay. I won’t be staying long.”

Disappointing. And ominous.

“Something to drink?”

Eva’s hands went to her narrow throat and she swallowed dryly. “Water would be nice.”

She took a seat in the chair she usually sat in when she used to come to write with him, in what felt like another lifetime. Sebastian sat across from her and placed two glasses of water on the coffee table. Eva’s hand trembled slightly as she sipped hers, and Sebastian wondered what he could do to ease her nerves.