‘
Evil be he who thinketh evil
,’ I said breathlessly, reciting the tattoo on my back. His touch was so gentle and his fingers soft.
‘Why do you have this?’ he whispered. ‘That exact expression.’
‘A family motto.’
I hated this. Hated lying. Hated that he had been the one who inked it on to my skin and proceeded to kiss me for hours afterwards. We both believed it to be our motto, once upon a time. If I
believed I was evil, it would inform my intentions. I could be as horrible as I wanted, if that’s who I truly was. Many, many times as I bit into the neck of the living I told myself,
‘It’s in my nature.’
I didn’t know there was so much more to me than pain. I didn’t know until I became human again.
Rhode’s fingers dropped away and he frowned at me.
‘What? You don’t like tattoos?’ I offered, trying to make a joke. Rhode clearly did not want to play around.
‘What is it with you?’ he asked. ‘Why did you come here?’
‘For school.’
‘Why did you lie about knowing how to shoot?’
‘If you knew I was lying, then why did you agree to teach me?’ We stared at one another and I wanted nothing more than to tell him the whole truth. I was on the edge of it too. I
didn’t know how to start. I had made up this whole charade and Fire had made it so clear.
‘What? Say it!’ Rhode said.
I exhaled sharply. ‘I don’t know how.’
‘Forget it. It’s almost time for lunch,’ he said, breaking our gaze and slinging the quiver of arrows over his shoulder. I didn’t want to push my deceit any further, so
as he walked away I mentioned our evening plans. Maybe I could find a way to tell him tonight. Once he saw a vampire or something? Perhaps it would be easier that way.
‘We’re going out tonight,’ I said. ‘To Bolt in Orleans.’
He hesitated and his anger seems to dissipate a bit when he said, ‘Tony told me. Clubs aren’t exactly my . . .’
‘Thing?’ I offered.
‘Right,’ he agreed. ‘You coming back to campus?’ he asked. I took the invitation even though he was just being polite.
We walked down the hill together and I was grateful for the change of subject.
‘Oh, come on, British. You can’t do it? Just once? Nine thirty,’ I teased.
‘Want to know the truth?’ he asked. My light jokes were clearly still not appreciated. He slung the arrow pack so it sat tighter on his shoulder.
‘I don’t trust you. Frogs in your room, lying about archery, arrows shot within inches of your head. And your tattoo with that
exact
saying.’
‘Do you remember . . . I mean, do you know the phrase?’ I asked.
‘I can’t figure you out. You show up here just when something isn’t quite right. And you . . .’ He trailed off.
‘What?’ I asked gently.
‘You
look
at me.’
‘How do I look at you?’
He said nothing, but seemed to consider what he wanted to say. He didn’t give me time to explain. Rhode strode away quickly, leaving me at the base of the archery hill, alone.
At nine thirty I walked up the path from Turner to wait for Tracy in the parking lot. When I came around the bend, a familiar wrought-iron bench was in front of the entrance to
Seeker dorm. I ran my finger over the curl of the design. Vicken had sat here many times. I had yet to say goodbye to him the vampire way, with a ritual. But I hadn’t had a chance.
Vicken’s life was now done. The one bright spot in this mess of darkness was that his soul was white and his story completed.
Tracy pulled up in front of the building in a silver SUV. She honked twice just as Tony stepped up the path and stopped next to me. He threw an arm over my shoulder.
‘Lenah, Lenah, Lenah. Are you sure you’re ready for these dance moves?’
‘I’ve seen them before. Trust me, they leave much to be desired.’
‘Much to be desired?’ he said in a mock British accent.
We piled into the car with Claudia, Kate and Tracy.
‘Lenah!’ Claudia said from the back seat. ‘You look amazing!’
‘Thanks,’ I said.
My red tank top revealed a bit more cleavage than I would have liked. Tracy had assured me when I was trying it on that it covered the dagger hilt that stuck up just a little from my belt.
‘That’s all that matters, right?’ she said.
‘No, really, red is better on you,’ Claudia continued. ‘I’ve only seen you in black.’
I had not forgotten the soft wisps of Claudia’s hair as it fanned out on the floor of the art tower. She had died painfully but fast in Odette’s clutches. I had not forgotten her
will to fight. I would never forget.
‘I need to switch it up,’ I said, and cleared my throat. It was best to stick to the subject at hand, because after all, I couldn’t say I was happy to see her alive.
I was glad she didn’t notice that I had chosen to wear combat boots. I couldn’t run or potentially tackle someone in four-inch heels.
‘Are we waiting for someone else?’ I asked, when the car didn’t move.
Just as I said it, Rhode stepped out of the darkened pathway. I immediately fumbled with my belt, careful not to expose the ruby-encrusted hilt of the knife I had hidden away. Rhode slid into
the seat next to me, he smelled fresh like aftershave.
The modern-day ointment masked the woody, ancient scent I was used to.
‘I didn’t think you would come,’ I said quietly.
Rhode clicked his seatbelt shut.
‘Two hours, Tony. That’s it,’ he said.
‘Live a little, Lewin,’ Tony said turning from the front seat.
‘No debate team? No prep for assembly?’ Kate said. ‘No speech for student council?’ She added, ‘Oh, by the way, that was a good speech on pranks this morning. You
scared everyone to death.’
‘The wrath of Rhode,’ Claudia added.
‘The movie!’ Tony added, and everyone erupted into laughter, even me.
‘Since Justin’s disappearance and now Jackie Simms’s, I think it’s rather stupid to go off campus,’ Rhode said. Jackie Simms – that was her name. Jackie had
been abducted from school in March and Justin was most likely the person responsible. The coincidence was just too convenient.
We turned on to Main Street and I met Tracy’s eyes in the rear-view mirror.
‘Rhode likes to talk fancy,’ Claudia said with a giggle.
‘Do you now?’ I asked, finally finding the courage to look at him. I wondered how I was going to break through the wall of distrust. He had said it so plainly.
I don’t
trust you.
‘That gem,’ Rhode said. He gestured at the necklace Fire had given me. ‘I noticed it earlier, but I thought it was a reflection from the sun. It’s really unique. Is it
changing colour?’
‘Just a cheap thing,’ I said, bringing my fingers to the stone. Interesting! Rhode could sense that my gem wasn’t natural. Perhaps this was a small clue that he might be able
to recall something about our life together.
His eyes lingered on my fingers covering the pendant but quickly looked ahead, his jaw tight. Damn it. I didn’t know if he could tell I was lying.
I can’t figure you out. You show up here just when something isn’t quite right.
As Rhode’s words replayed in my head, my good mood dissipated.
I don’t trust you
, he had said.
He clenched his jaw tight and I knew it was because of me.
Bolt Club was the biggest club on the Cape, with two floors. We found only one empty table near the ground-level dance floor. Rhode went to grab drinks and Tracy was in charge
of ordering appetizers. Claudia and Kate joined her, which made it easier for Tony and me to be alone.
‘I think there might be a table upstairs . . .’ Tony said, making an excuse so we could scout out the club. The upstairs tables were favourable seating, so it made his lie
believable.
Tony and I climbed to the first floor to look for the vampire, the one with the silver pendant and strange eyes. We stepped out and on to the deck. There was no bar but instead there were many
tables filled with Wickham students. Some people tried to get Tony and me to come sit with them and chat, but I couldn’t allow myself to be distracted. If the vampire was watching us now he
would have hundreds of faces to hide behind. There were plenty of people crowding Bolt.
Another stairway on the deck led down to the parking lot. A woman teetered down the stairs in five-inch platforms. A girl from my French class leaned in to kiss a boy I recognized.
‘Any sign of him?’ Tony asked.
‘Not yet. He’ll keep to the shadows,’ I said. After checking through the people on the deck, we walked inside.
Tony and I found a spot where we could lean against a wrap-around balcony. Black lacquer covered most of the surfaces, making them seem slick. Tony bopped his head to the music and observed the
dance floor below. I inhaled foreign smells, still amazed how different the odours of the modern world could be. Sugary sweet drinks, and oil from bodies that were deodorized by powder and
perfumes. As people passed, I couldn’t help but applaud Tracy’s choice of ensemble for me. Most girls wore form-fitting dresses and sky-high heels. Form-fitting was actually an
understatement.
A girl walked past us. She wore a black dress with two thin straps and black heels that could have skewered a wild beast.
‘Hello . . .’ Tony said. He turned his body to follow the girl as she joined a table of people.
I hit him playfully. ‘You have a girlfriend.’
‘Who is sexier than that girl!’ Tony smiled brightly.
Under the dance of lights, we headed towards the stairs to the main floor.
I imagined for a brief moment my mother and father at a table here in their simple shifts. Would anything in this club remind them of the world in which they lived and breathed? The only thing
that was the same? People. They talked and laughed together; that was the same. I supposed humans would always love to converse with one another, no matter the age. But so much about this world was
different from my world in England. Not just the clothes but also the casual way people went about their lives. They simply had more time than I did in the fifteenth century. In the medieval world,
if you reached thirty you were positively ancient.
At the top of the stairs, a man with light skin swirled ice in his drink. Whiskey sloshed over the rim and dripped down the sides of the glass, like the blood I once carried in brimming goblets.
The man motioned to me as if he wanted to dance, but I panicked and gripped on to Tony.
‘That man would have been a tasty aperitif in my former life,’ I muttered in Tony’s ear.
Tony pulled me down the stairs. I stopped to pretend to fix something on my shoe as I moved the dagger from my waist to my boot. I could grab it just as easily, but it wouldn’t be so
obvious to someone standing close to me on a dance floor.
‘When you’re done adjusting your
accessories
, can we dance?’ Tony asked with a small tilt of his head.
He pulled me along and we made it to the dance floor. When I had first come to this club, Tony hadn’t been here. He hadn’t understood my friendship with Justin. As I followed Tony
now, he wiggled his behind to make me laugh. He should have been here back then. I shouldn’t have shut him out. At the time, I thought it was the best thing to do. He had feelings for me and
I couldn’t return them. It had been selfish not to have been more open with him from the start.
‘So, Vampire Queen,’ Tony said, ‘did you ever see anyone dance like this?’
He waved his hand up and down, accidentally smacking some girl in the behind.
She spun around.
‘Oh my
. . .
’ Tony said, freezing.
‘
What
are you doing?’ she barked.
‘Accident. Complete accident.’
I laughed and let Tony fend for himself, which he did by running off the dance floor. He passed Rhode, who was standing at the top of the dance floor stairs. On cue, the song changed to a slow
ballad. The lights high above flickered red, then blue over the dance floor as Rhode made his way to me. I couldn’t help but take him in; I wanted to run my fingers over his broad and
muscular chest. The steel grey of his button-down shirt made the blue of his eyes absolutely radiate.
So this was Rhode and me as humans. Itrembled from the anticipation of his closeness to me.
‘Shall we dance?’ he asked in a low voice, close to my ear.
‘You sure you want to?’ I asked, given how we parted at the archery hill. He wasn’t exactly friendly during the car ride over here either.
‘Have you ever danced before?’ he asked.
‘Yes,’ I replied, thinking it was a strange question.
‘Good. See? The truth. It’s working for us already.’
I had to look away; my cheeks warmed.
Rhode laced his hands with mine . . .
Rhode takes my hand. This is the 1700s and we are in a giant ballroom. Palm to palm, we move in calculated steps, creating heat every time we touch. We love so deeply that when our skin
meets, a thrill of heat shoots through my cold, dead vampire body.
In that memory we turned to the right, to the left and touched palms on each side. We danced with our hands pressed together in front of a room of humans who had no idea how important it was for
us to love. To love so deeply that when your dead heart could no longer beat, your true love’s warmth could light you up from the inside.
The pulse from the electronic speakers returned me to the dance floor at Bolt. I blinked away the ballroom of my memory, but the young man across from me was the same.
Rhode slipped a hand around my waist. I was grateful I had dropped my dagger in my boot.
‘Closer,’ he whispered. ‘Like this.’ There was no space between us, our bodies completely touching. I inhaled his very distinct human smell: aftershave and something
sweet I couldn’t quite identify. It was the same comforting smell from the archery field.
‘Rhode,’ I whispered, ‘I’m sorry about today.’
‘Why do you do this to me?’ he asked. The music swelled around us. ‘You confuse me. Completely. I can’t understand you. Your behaviour, how you look at me. How I feel
about you.’ His eyes danced over my face as if he was understanding something about me for the first time. ‘Fascinating,’ he said. ‘And beautiful.’