Dreams of a Dark Warrior (42 page)

captured her and let mortals cut on her.

He yel ed, “Then do it!”

She gasped at the unbearable pain in his expression, the hopelessness. What in the gods’ names had

happened to him in this lifetime?

No, it doesn’t matter.

He strode toward her across the clearing, growing more incensed with each step—as if he were

pissed that she hadn’t attacked him. “Swing that fuckin’ sword!”

Regin clutched the hilt. “You have a death wish?”

“See—this—done.” Getting closer. “Why are you hesitating?”

She didn’t know!

“You want to put me down? Aye, you should yearn to. Do it now!” When he was a few feet from her, he

lunged forward; she raised the sword point to his chest. Right at his heart.

But she couldn’t drive it home.

He shoved his chest against the point until it sank into his skin. “Goddamn it, do it! Don’t you want

revenge, Valkyrie? Al that pain you suffered was my doing! Mine! Directly from the start.”

Lightning struck with her frustration, thunder booming instantly. The winds howled around them.

“Do you know what I was thinking before I captured you in New Orleans? That you were just another

job to complete before I got to return home. Another detrus added to my personal
collection
of them. That night, I stabbed you with my sword. Remember how I twisted it inside you?”

She remembered al too wel , the pain, the betrayal.
One of many to come. …

“And don’t forget when I tortured you. The poison was so strong that you dislocated your shoulder from

your seizures. Oh, and that vivisection? I must have ordered them on hundreds of your kind. Maybe

thousands. And I never once doubted that I had every right to.”

“Because you believe immortals are unnatural?” she bit out. “That we’re animals?”

“
Less than
animals.” As if he was quoting someone, he intoned, “Abominations walking among us, fil ed with untold malice toward mankind. A perversion of the natural order, spreading their deathless numbers

uncontrol ably. A plague upon man that must be eradicated.”

“Then why save me from those vampires tonight? Why al ow the vivisection, then turn around and

rescue me? You could’ve stopped what Dixon and those fucks did to me!”

“You want to know why I didn’t stop them? Because I was high in my room, Regin. With a needle

jammed in my vein. While you were getting butchered, I was knocked out, oblivious to the world.”

Her lips parted wordlessly.

“Think of everything I’ve done to your friends and al ies. That’s what I do—I hurt your kind. I take them

from their homes, from their families.” His eyes were haunted, his lashes spiked with moisture. Voice

hoarse, he rasped,
“Put me out of my fuckin’ misery, woman. Do it.”

Gods, he was so damaged, so … ruined. As she gazed at his eyes, dim impressions arose in her

mind. Her face wet with warm tears? Why couldn’t she remember?

Suddenly, he gripped her shoulders—to yank her into him.

FORTY-ONE

N
o!”
The Valkyrie raised her leg at the last minute, kicking him back, then threw the sword across the clearing.

She hadn’t run that steel through Declan, though he’d al but forced her to.

“Why can’t you do it?” he bel owed.

“I don’t know!” She sounded dazed. “Do you real y want me to? You’re that miserable?”

When he’d been staring down that sword, he’d accepted death. But now he realized that if he died,

she’d have one less protector. He had to get her off this island first.

“You don’t deserve my mercy,” she said, her voice breaking. Tears wel ed in her eyes. The sight of

them pained him far worse than that sword ever could have.

“No. I don’t.” Stil , he had the mad urge to explain his actions, to explain why he’d grown so cal ous to

immortals, why he’d believed her kind had to be control ed. Why it’d fal en to him.

The training that made me a monster.

Yet he knew he could never make her understand.

“I’ve been tortured before, Chase. But never like this. They talked about golf and movies while they

…”—she bit back a sob—“while they played with my womb.”

Warring impulses raged inside him. Declan wanted to yel with wrath, to comfort her, to annihilate any

who’d dared touch her.

“You promised me I’d beg. Oh, how I did. And I wil always hate myself for that. I begged
you
to make it stop! You can’t comprehend what it’s like! The
violation
…”

“Maybe I comprehend more than you think!” Seeing Colm’s throat slit, watching his parents being eaten

alive.
Feeling the flesh peeled from my goddamned body.

His words seemed to enrage her. “If you’ve witnessed it a thousand times, then you’re an expert at it?

Is that it?” Her lips were drawn back from her teeth. “You
disgust
me. You know nothing.
Nothing
!”

For her to discount what he’d been through? “I know everything!” he roared as he tore off his shirt.

She gasped, blinking rapidly as if she couldn’t believe her eyes.

“Don’t tel me what I can or can’t comprehend!” He turned to show her his back. When he faced her

again, her expression was horrified. “I know what pain is, Regin! I know what it feels like to be powerless.”

Lightning struck again. She stumbled back a step, then another.

Slipping away from me forever.
He reached for her, but she shook her head slowly.

“You stay away from me, Chase. Whatever you want me for, whatever you think might be between us,

forget about it. It’s just …
dead
between us!” She turned back toward the bunker, covering her mouth as if she was going to be sick.

As he watched her hurrying from him, he had a flash memory from long ago. From the day the Order’s

physicians had removed his bandages.

His first thought upon seeing what was left of his chest had confused him, had made no sense in the

context of his life.

When he’d gazed in horror at his skin, he’d thought …

She will never want me like this.

Regin ran blindly back to the bunker, losing energy, vomiting it free of her body.

Scars covered Chase’s chest, back, and arms. The wounds were curving, ritualistic. He
had
been

tortured. And he was clearly stil living with the aftereffects.

Track marks lined his inner arms.

The sight of his scars hadn’t sickened her; the
idea
of them did. They’d rocked her because she could imagine the pain behind them.

Who’d done that to him? She remembered speaking to him about his hatred of immortals, remembered

guessing that some had hurt him and his family. He’d never denied it.

She could piece together a likely scenario. A number of them had kil ed his loved ones. He’d survived

the ordeal, then joined the Order for revenge.

She slowed, some memory tickling at her conscious-ness, but she couldn’t recal it. …

No wonder he hates us.

She flung open the door to the torture warehouse, wincing at the pain in her chest. As soon as she

could grab a decent weapon, she was gone from this place. She’d go it alone before she stayed near

Chase.

Chase. With his defeated eyes, lost expression, and palpable yearning.

Damn it, I don’t have internal struggles!
If she hated someone, she hated them. Period. She’d vowed to mete retribution on him.

So why was she feeling that old pul to him? Why did she want to go and erase that haunted look in his

eyes?
Shh, warrior, be at ease.

Aidan had been so beautiful and proud, a king in his world. He’d never known a single defeat until the

very end of his life.

Chase was… he was
wretched
. He’d clearly been dealt tragedy early. If each reincarnation

emphasized a facet of Aidan, then Declan Chase was the worst of him.

Pain and hate personified.

His body had been maimed. Yet his face… As she’d backed away from him, her lightning had struck,

il uminating his visage.

A face made more beautiful by lightning.
He’d looked like some kind of tormented, dark angel.

And that tragic beauty and raw longing cal ed to her as no other embodiment had. …

When she entered the exam room, Lothaire gazed at her from his perch, his eerie reddened eyes

fol owing her movements.

“What are you looking at?” Soon she’d confront him about his past crimes against the Valkyrie, but not

until she’d healed more.
Not until I have a shot at bringing home his fangs to my sisters.
Then she’d slay him.

“Some of us are trying to sleep,
suka
.”

“I’ve got your number, you son of a bitch.”

He casual y hissed, muttering in that thick Russian accent, “I’l be getting yours, drop by drop.”

Whatever that meant.

At the back of the room, Thad was asleep sitting up against the wal . Natalya was dozing with her head

in Brandr’s lap.

Regin frowned at this, then continued her search for a weapon. She’d left that sword outside.

Brandr eased Natalya’s head to the ground and crossed to Regin’s side. “Is Chase stil alive?”

“Unfortunately.”

“It’s definitely Aidan in there. Could scarcely believe it before. But now I’m certain of it.” His brows drew together. “What are you looking for?”

“I need a weapon, but I don’t want to take the last sword.”

“You’re leaving? What about our escape?”

“If I stay, I’l kil him,” she said. “I vowed to the Lore to get revenge on him.”

“Regin, if you’d seen him earlier, the way he reacted to your being hurt … Your vow’s been more than

fulfil ed.”

She was unconvinced.

“In a few days, the Order’s going to bomb the island. There’s only one way off—a boat on the far shore

over these mountains. If you’re not on that boat, you’re dead.”

“I’l find it and meet you there. If I don’t show in time, then leave without me.”

“You can’t go alone.”

I might not have to.
When Regin had been out in that clearing, just before Chase showed up, she’d sensed … a Valkyrie’s presence.

Was one of her half sisters on this island even now?

“The journey’s going to be dangerous,” Brandr said. “And I hate to say this, but right now, Chase is the

strongest of us here.”

“A mad dog is strong, but you don’t trust it with your life!”

“I’l put him on a leash then, tie his hands. Would you stay then?” When she hesitated, he said, “You

won’t make it off this island alive without him. And since I’m sworn to protect you, then I won’t either.”

In a lower tone, she said, “And what about Lothaire?”

“The vampire fought off Wendigos tonight, al owing al of us to escape here. Chase had to make some

kind of bargain with him.”

“So he cut a deal with an evil leech—”

“To save
you
. Look, I’m not asking you to forgive Chase. But maybe just try to understand him.”

“Do you know how many of our friends and al ies are on this island? How many died this night? How

many lives have been ruined? He’s behind al of that! He believes we’re al animals—including you!”

“I know this! I just want you to be aware that he made sacrifices tonight. That he’s at least trying to

make amends.”

“What do you want me to do? Get cozy with him—so he can die anyway?”

“Regin, this is the first time I’ve real y been around Aidan since he died. You’ve known him in the past,

for however briefly.” He ran his hand over the back of his neck. “But I’ve always been too late. I saw the knight breathe his last. I was with you when we buried the Spaniard’s empty coffin. I was running for the

cavalryman, yel ing a warning seconds before he was shot. I just … I want to see what this is like. To

have him back.”

Brandr misses him, too.

“But he’s not the same,” she said in a softer tone. “You’l only be disappointed.”

“Then you can leave him behind after we escape. What could it hurt to wait a few days … ?”

Even over the storm, Declan heard someone nearing, but he was too bloody weary to bother covering

his scars.

Fuck it. Let everyone see what he real y looked like. …

Brandr approached, his eyes narrowing at the sight. Yet he said nothing, just stalked around the

clearing, kicking a rock here, throwing a stick there.

Colm used to do that whenever he had something pressing he’d wanted to discuss. “Say what’s on

your mind, berserker.”

“What the hel are you doing out here?”

Sitting in the rain like a fool, wanting to howl from losing her.
Though he’d never had her to begin with!