Devil May Care (Four Horsemen MC Book 4) (19 page)

A long, tense moment as he waited for the verdict.

Beauregard slowly backed up, and then stalked off the porch, calling over his shoulder, “I prefer to think of it as a promise.”

Chapter Fourteen

“We’re royally fucked, aren’t we?” Captain asked as he sank down onto the couch beside Eddie minutes later. “And not in the fun way.”

“Yep, looks like,” she agreed sadly.

Tonight, had drained her both physically and emotionally. In the aftermath of her conversation with Beauregard, her bravado had faded and she’d started to worry about the inevitable fallout.  Judging by Captain’s grim mug, they were in similar frames of mind. This had all the makings of a regular shit show.

“We’ll figure it out, Killer Queen,” he said, putting an arm around her and squeezing. “We always do.”

Eddie had no doubt. He’d been getting the club out of scrapes for years, often with her help. If they put their heads together and thought this out, surely they’d come up with a solution.  “Wouldn’t it be nice if we didn’t have to figure out though? If we could have a normal day.”

He laughed. “No such animal. Besides, you’d be bored as hell.” He pulled her against his body rested his chin on the top of her head. God, she’d missed being held by a man, stroked. It felt good to take comfort in another person and he made it so damn easy.

 Then, she suddenly remembered Ryker was coming over. “The boys! They must be worried sick. I gotta tell them I’m okay. Where the hell is my phone?”

“Don’t sweat it. I texted both of ‘em. Said you’d see ‘em tomorrow. Ryker said all of your stuff is on the kitchen table.”

“Thanks.” With a sigh, she snuggled into his arms again and handed him a pint-sized mason jar full of White Lightning from the coffee table. She’d cracked it open when she’d gotten inside, mostly to get rid of that nasty julep taste. And frankly, fruit infusions wouldn’t cut it tonight. If she could mainline moonshine, she’d be shooting it in her veins right about now.

He took a long, slow sip, before setting it back on the table. Then, he curled up to her. He kissed her temple, then her cheek, and then his lips sought hers. She sighed, head falling back as he tasted her mouth, gentle at first and then hungry, tinged with need.

  One that was building in her, too.

“I want you,” he moaned against her lips. “I knew I said I’d wait, but tonight we got really fuckin’ close. One of us could be six feet under.”

Her heart skipped a beat, an honest to God flutter.

She knew Captain, trusted him implicitly. She adored this man. He’d been her shoulder to cry on, her cheering squad, and a rock when the times had gotten tough. He loved this way of life, loved the club, and she couldn’t imagine a better place to be than at his side.  And while she couldn’t yet articulate it, she could show him with her body how much he meant to her.

What he might come to mean to her.

“I want you, too.”

Eddie shifted position on the sofa, straddling his hips, and set about learning his body. She smoothed his eyebrows with her thumbs, kissed his forehead, the tip of his nose. Then threaded fingers through his blond hair and kissed him again, this time with urgency. Right now, she needed this, needed him.

She could feel him, growing hard beneath her ass. His hips flexed a bit, rubbing against her. “Oh, you like to be on top, huh?” he gasped.

“Always.”

“I knew that.”

She laughed, before rubbing her cheek against his stubbled jaw. “Hey, you’re the one who brought up Mrs. Robinson. I’m just playin’ the part and seducin’ you.”

“But I don’t want to play, Killer Queen,” he said, cupping her face, looking her in the eye. “This ain’t a game to me. It’s as fucking serious as it gets. So, are you sure?” he asked. “Because I’ve wanted this, wanted
you
forever and once we make love, I can’t go back to be your friend.” His eyes were earnest, filled with longing, a touch of anxiety. “It would fucking kill me.”

“I’m ready. I want you.”

He sucked in a breath and his hips bucked again. “You want to go upstairs?”

She shook her head. Together, they would reclaim her bed after they made love. “No. No bed. No old memories weighing me down this first time. I want you. Right here. Right now.”

Suddenly, Captain grimaced and she wondered if he’d somehow changed his mind. Maybe he’d decided he wanted a young girl after all? Or what if he was some kind of clit tease? Followin’ her around all these years, only to chicken out at the last minute…but it was nothing like that.

“Oh, fuck me! I didn’t bring a condom.” He groped for his wallet. “I can get one! Don’t worry. Just give me ten minutes…”

Eddie’s laughter cut him off and then she gave him a wicked smile. “Hate to tell you this, honey, but I can’t make babies anymore and I haven’t had sex with anything that didn’t have batteries in…well, a
really
long time. You’re safe on my end, so we don’t really need one.”

“Hold up, I’m still contemplatin’ that batteries thing. Now, that sounds like one hell of a show. Maybe you could demonstrate...”

“Captain!”

“What?” he teased.

“You know what?  And what about you? You said somethin’ earlier about being a monk.”

“I have been. Kinda been savin’ all my love for you, Killer Queen. And don’t worry, Duke has been all up in everybody’s bodily fluids lately. Testin’ and handin’ out antibiotics. Said somethin’ about a ‘public health hazard’ and how we’re all gonna die of syph one of these days if we don’t fuckin’ use the condoms he makes the prospects pass out.” His voice lowered an octave. “So, I’m all yours.
Au naturale
, even.”

That’s all she needed to hear. Enough waiting…she’d waited too damn long for this, for him.

And then she started stripping him.

She needed to be skin to skin with Captain. First, she slid his black muscle shirt over his head, and then went to work on the guitar belt buckle, before pulling the black leather belt from the first couple of loops. Eddie unzipped his flies and cupped him through the boxer shorts, stroking, getting the feel of him. He groaned, his head lolling back of the sofa.

 And all of a sudden, it wasn’t enough. She needed more contact. She arched up, her thighs on either side of his as he shimmied out of his jeans. His cock stood at attention, thick and hard. The tip peeked out from beneath its hood and she stroked him with a fingertip, making Captain groan.  

“Fuck, I’m going to die. Right here. Right now.”

Then, she gripped his cock and pumped.  His breath hissed from between his teeth and he bit down on his lower lip.  After a few moments, he grasped her wrist. “Keep it up and this’ll be a real short but sweet. I’ve been on edge for hours.”

“Can’t have that now, can we?”

With a grin, she released him and slipped out of her sweater. He palmed her breasts through the satin fabric of her bra and her nipples pebbled, then reached around and unfastened the catch, before tossing it aside. He bent his head and licked her nipple, before sucking it, grazing it with his teeth.

Eddie cupped his head, holding him close. When he’d lavished attention on both breasts, he reached for the waistband of her skirt, unzipping the back. Eddie stood up and shimmied out of it, leaving her in the garters and stockings.

He watched her, his pupils blown wide, and his cheeks hollowed.  Then, he pushed his jeans and underwear down his hips, yanking them down until they hit the floor and kicked the material away.

“Come here, Killer Queen, let me love you.” He held out a hand and she took it, straddling him once more.  She reached between her thighs and positioned his cock at her entrance and then slowly slid down on him.

God, he felt so good.  He was inside her, big, thick and oh-so-fucking hard. Eddie waited a minute, letting her body adjust to his size. She’d forgotten how good it felt to have a real man between her legs. Then, she swayed against him, making them both moan, tried to find a rhythm, but it alluded her.

“No, not like that. Look at me,” he whispered, cupping her face.

She did, seeing nothing but tenderness in his eyes. Love.  She held him close, rocked against him.  And then they moved in unison, as one person. And she wasn't alone anymore. She was joined, enjoined with another person.

He was part of her. She was part of him.

 It felt so right. So damn good.

Clutched in his arms, she came gasping his name, and Captain followed her, roaring. For the first time, she felt like the ghost of her former husband had finally been laid to rest.

Eddie was alive. Fully living and breathing…and maybe, just maybe falling in love again.

***

Later, they laid together in her bed, wrapped in each other’s arms, kissing and cuddling. That was a new term:
her bed
. This house, this place, hadn’t ever felt like hers. It had always been
theirs,
hers and Joker’s. Now, it was hers. Her bed, her house, her life. Eddie liked the sound of that.

 “I’ve been thinkin’ about you, about us,” he said, running his fingertips up and down her spine gently. “And how I got here.”

“Tell me.”

“I was gonna captain a ship like my dad before me. But then I fell into being a biker, and then became president.”

She understood completely. “I don’t we can anticipate where we’ll end up.” She’d never planned on marrying a biker, but she’d met Joker and her life changed in the space of one night. “I think fate has a way of guiding you through the twists and turns.”

He kissed the tip of her nose.  “It lead me to you, and I don’t regret that.”

“Yeah?” she asked. “Me either.”

 Captain tucked a hand beneath his head, laying back against the pillows and she curled up on her side next to him.  “It’s funny, this is one of the best and worst nights of my life. All in one. I don’t think it’s been like this since before the RICO days.”

She nodded. She’d been thinking it, too. Back then, the guys had deep into the dark side of the outlaw biker lifestyle. Each day had come with a new shit storm to handle.

“It’s got me thinkin’ about my future. What I want for myself. I don’t know if bein’ president is on the menu anymore. What’s that sayin’? Heavy is the head that wears the crown or some shit. I ain’t never been a real big Shakespeare fan, but Lex loves to quote the bastard.”

Eddie could hear the pride in his voice. “She’s a smart kid. Are you sayin’ you want to step down?”

“Yeah. I shouldn’t be the president. I didn’t earn it. I got it by default.”

She understanding his reasoning. When everyone had been either taken in or killed in the shootout with the feds, there hadn’t been another choice. Goat was in jail at the time for assault and when he got out, he turned it down, and said Cap was doing a good job. But in Eddie’s mind, he’d earned his rank.

“But you saved the club. We wouldn’t even have a club without you.”

“Or without you. You’re the one who got our financial house in order. Helped us find a way to earn that was legit.”

“We both did it,” she said firmly. Working as a team, they’d kept the club together and it hadn’t been easy. They’d had several lean years. He looked away, his brow furrowing.  “What is it?” she asked softly.

He snorted.  “Look at me. I’m at the top, the president of the Four Horsemen.  And what I say is law. I’m the fuckin’ King of Hell and I don’t want it anymore. I can’t even remember
why
I wanted it to begin with.”

Captain glanced down at her.  “I’m in a different place now. Being president is a fuckin’ time consumin’ job and it only gets harder. I’m startin’ to resent it, and it shouldn’t be like that.  I think it might be time to let someone else take the reins.  Maybe Shepherd.”

Eddie had the strangest feeling something else was going on, too. She had no doubt he wanted more time for himself and his daughter, but Captain seemed…troubled.
Off,
somehow. She wasn’t getting the full story. “Is that all? You just want to step back from the club? Anything else going on?”

He faltered a moment, swallowing so hard his Adam’s apple bobbed. “Yeah, that’s it.”

“Then step down. God knows you’ve earned a break.”

Besides, the club was full of young men without commitments and one of them would love to step up, and call the shots. Being president took a toll. There were always decisions to be made, disputes to settle. Not to mention the fact that he never got to be one of the brothers. He always had to hold back with them, so he could make the hard calls.

“It wouldn’t…disappoint you?”

“Of course not.”

He blew out a breath. “I could hang out more with Lex, before she gets too busy with her own life to pal around with her old man.” He brushed a kiss against her lips. “And I could spend more time with you.”

Joker had always been an ambitious man. He’d put in long hours, climbing the ranks in the club. He hadn’t managed his home responsibilities well, but he’d been a good provider for her and the boys. But it sounded like Captain would be willing to put her first.  And she didn’t know how to react to that.  It was unexpected, but wonderful.

Captain sat up and bed and so did she, so they were facing one another. “I want to make my intentions clear.”

“Okay.” She stared at him, wondering where all this was going.

Then, he laid it all out for her. “I’m a grown ass man and I ain’t gonna beat around no bush, playin’ hard to get. What do I want from life? That’s simple. You.”

She didn’t know what to say.

 “I want to sleep beside you at night and wake up with you in my arms. I want to share your meals.  I want to make you laugh and hold you when you cry.” He let out a long, shuddering breath.. “I want to grow old with you, beside you,” he murmured as he brought her hand to his mouth, then brushed a kiss over her knuckles.

He grimaced at  the sight Joker’s name on the back of her wrist.

She could feel hot tears welling in her eyes, torn between her old life and a possible new one. She had feelings for Captain. After all, they’d been friends for decades and the attraction had always simmered beneath the surface. She didn’t know what to make of them as a couple exactly, or what to do about it.