Destructive Silence (The Destructive Series) (10 page)

“Don’t make empty promises Caine,” I say as calmly as I can. My blood pressure is probably through the roof. I know my face is flushed. I am heartbroken. I want to go
home, curl up in a ball, and cry myself to sleep. As if sensing my distress, Caine stops dancing, pulling back slightly to look me in the eye. “I would like to go home,” I whimper.

“Lacey, please don’t do this. Trust me. I wouldn’t betray you,” he pleads.

“Okay. I’d like to use the restroom and get myself together.” I take a deep breath.

“Lacey, stop being paranoid; you shouldn’t need a moment away from me to freshen up. That would mean you don’t trust what I’m saying to you. I cannot believe you are making assumptions based on some hussy that confused me for someone else. You tell me all the time to
trust you, but you don’t trust me?”
Oh. My. God... He did not just throw that in my face.
I think I’m going to be sick!

I gather my composure. “I’m sorry.” I lie. “I shouldn’t have jumped to conclusions. Let me freshen up
, and I promise I won’t get upset anymore.” I lie again.

“That sounds good. I love you,” he says, loosening his grip on me.

“You too.” I walk to the ladies room. I feel tears threatening to spill. I cannot get myself behind a stall door quick enough. I pray I’ll make it before I break down. Opening the ladies room door, I come face to face with
the
bitch.
Fuck!
A mischievous smile is on her face. “Why, hello there,” she says happily.

I somehow muster the confidence to stand up for myself. “I don’t know what the hell you think you were doing out there
, but keep your fucking mouth off my boyfriend. You really embarrassed yourself,” I quip.

She moves calmly to lean against the wall, shifting her weight onto one leg. “Are you sure,
I
embarrassed
my
self?” she says, tilting her head in confusion with a hint of a smile. “I don’t think I’m the one with her head in the sand,” she retorts, trying to get a rise out of me. She won, and oh boy, am I pissed now.

“I think it is in your best interest to leave the fucking building. You can play your sneaky, tramp-ass games with someone else.” My voice is starting to get louder.

“Sure thing sweetie, I’ll leave.” She smiles. “But when Caine doesn’t come home until late at night, just remember, he’s moonlighting with me,” she tosses her head back and walks out the door.

I stand, paralyzed by her words. She kn
ows his name. Caine just told me, to my face, that he’s never seen her before. What the fuck?
That two-timing ass-wipe!
I need to get out of here. I pull my phone out of my purse and dial a cab to drive me home, because I don’t need this bullshit. I deserve better than that charming but dishonest motherfucker. I look at myself in the mirror and say, ‘Lacey get yourself together. You have five minutes until you’ll be swept away from this horror scene.’ I wet a paper towel and dab my cheeks to get the flush under control. My makeup is surprisingly untouched. I’m too pissed off to cry now.

Taking a deep breath, I open the door, praying Caine isn’t waiting for me. For once, he’s not. I walk into the ballroom to retrieve my shawl. Damn it, who fucking cares about a shawl when your relationship is falling apart? I should just get the hell out of here. From across the room, I can make out the back of Caine’s head. He is talking with some of his friends and they don’t notice me.
Thank God.
I grab my shawl. “Lacey, where are you going?”
Shit!
It’s one of the spouses. What the hell was her name? Ugh, who cares!? “I’m just going to step out and get some fresh air. I’ll be right back,” I say as convincingly as I can. “Would you like some company?” she asks.
Hell NO!
“Oh no, that’s okay.” I slap on my fake smile and it matches my fake relationship. “Okay. If Caine asks, I’ll tell him you’ll be right back,” she says. “Thank you. I won’t be long,” I say, unable to look her in the eye for fear she’ll be able to read my mind. I smile, turn towards the door and walk to where my carriage will take me away from this foul place.

Not even one minute after walking outside, my cab shows up. I settle into the taxi and as he pulls away; I watch the beautiful trees, the magnificent lawns
, and the flowers pass by. Earlier, I thought I would have remembered them with fond memories and a strong heart. Now, they will remind me of what once was, and of tremendous heartache. With each tree, I am further and further away from that bastard. I cannot believe he has done this. I will never be able to move past the deceit. We are over. Here I am leaving him without his knowledge once again. It’s what I do. I run.

Pieces

I walk into the house and rush to my room, falling against the door
and allowing the tears to finally spill. I cry. I cry so hard I'm sure I would have made an ogre look good. I ugly cry. There is a soft knock on my door. “Lacey, are you okay sweetie?” Did she just say sweetie?
Fucking great.
Now when mom calls me sweetie, I’m going to remember that ugly tart.

I may as well get this over with. I open my door. Mom gasps, causing me to worry that I might have turned into an ogre after all, though
it’s probably from my raccoon eyes. “Lacey what happened?” she asks, pulling me in for a hug. I can’t stop the waterworks now. The comfort of my mom’s embrace allows me the security to pour my heart out. She moves me to my bed. “Mom,” I pause, “he’s ah ah, he’s been ah cheating.” I start sobbing hysterically.

Mom waits a few minutes until I calm down a little before she asks, “How about I go make us some tea and we can talk?” Mom's cure for everything is Celestial Seasonings Sleepy Time tea. I nod, unable to speak without losing my composure. She leaves, pulling my door closed. I sit on the edge of my bed, still in a state of shock though I don’t know why because Becca tried to warn me. I just couldn’t believe her. Ugh, I can only imagine what she is going to
say. I pull my heels off, hurling them into my closet, as if my shoes are a part of the hurt that I can’t escape. I stand and begin to quickly change, ridding my body of anything that touched Caine. I don't want to see anything that reminds me of being at that place. I dress in my pajamas and look over at the gown I was so fond of; now lying in a pile on the floor.

I walk into the bathroom to clean my face. The doorbell rings and I freeze. I can hear my mom arguing with whoever is at the door. Oh my God, that voice.
It’s Caine!
Please mom, please send him away. “She’s here.” Pause. “I think you need to give her space. I’ll tell her you came by.” There is some mumbling and then I hear my mom say, “I’ll tell her you want her to call you tomorrow, but I can’t promise anything.” I hear some more mumbling. I can't take this anymore. I storm out of the bathroom to meet this womanizing man face to face.

“No mom, I will not be calling him tomorrow, or the next day, or the day after that. Caine, we are done. You charmed me into thinking you loved me. Someone who’s in love doesn’t have a fling on the side. I know for a fact that you
did
know the girl that slapped her lips on you. She told me everything. She told me about the late nights when you say you're working. She told me what you're really doing. You're such a sadistic man. Was it fun? Was it fun breaking my heart? I loved you. I am an idiot to believe your lies. I am a fool for not trusting my best friend and what other people were telling me. I was the stupid fool. We are done. Don’t call me. Don’t come by. I never want to see your face again." I take a step back to close the door.

Caine's voice stops me. “Please Lacey. I’m so sorry. I never meant to hur...”

I cut him off. “Save it Caine. You made your bed, now you must lie in it. I don’t care anymore. We are through. Leave now!” I begin to shut the door in his face. He throws his foot against the doorjamb. “Seriously Caine, is there anything else to say?” I ask, exhausted.

“Oh hell yes there is a lot more to say. I love you. I never wanted you to find out like this. You need to know I haven’t cheated on you the whole time we’ve been together. It only happened a few times. I was weak baby. I don’t know how else to explain it. I am so sorry, Lacey. Please forgive me. Please don’t do this. I love you so much.” His words soothe my heartache and I want to believe him.
Wait? Did he just admit to cheating on me?

“You bastard!” I slap both hands on his chest, pushing him out. “I cannot talk to you anymore,” I yell, tears racing down my cheeks.

I hope my neighbor isn’t looking out her window now because of all the commotion. She is way too nosy for her own good and revels in drama. She is not the nicest person. My nickname for her is 'EML' short for Evil Mail Lady. I swear she stands by her window waiting for her mail every day except Sundays. If you park anywhere near her mailbox, she raises a stink. This is just one of her crazy issues. She never waves or responds when anyone greets her. My sister calls her 'The Recluse'. And there it is; she has turned her porch light on. The entire neighborhood will know about Caine and me before I even open my eyes tomorrow, thanks to EML.
Nosy bitch.

“Please Lacey. Please don’t make me walk away. Please get some sleep and call me tomorrow. Here's your bag." He leans in the doorway, placing the bag on the floor just inside the door. "I’ll pick you up and we can go to the park and talk. Just please don’t shut me out,” he begs me.

“I’ll think about it Caine. Goodnight.” I will say anything at this moment to get him to leave. I cannot stand to look at him right now. I gave him my heart and he walked all over it. I shut the door and my emotions get the better of me.

“Oh honey, come here.” Mom pulls me in, trying to take the pain away. “I loved him mom,” I sob. “I know sweetie.” Mom rubs my back trying to soothe me like she used to do when I would wake up from a nightmare as a little girl.

“Mom, can you please not call me sweetie anymore?” She looks at me shocked, her jaw hanging. “Mom that bitch... sorry! That floozy who told me everything about Caine called me sweetie and I can’t stand hearing it anymore. She ruined my love for the word." I sob more. "That girl stole so much from me, Mom. I’m sorry,” I tell her as she leads me into the kitchen.

“Lacey, you don’t have anything to be sorry about.” She hands me my cup of tea in my signature mug, covered with images of different breeds of dogs. “Have a seat.” She is hoping this will cure my heartbreak. The front door opens and my breath catches in my throat in a painful throb. Did I not lock the door? Surely he isn’t dumb enough to walk in after everything I said to him. Lane walks around the corner. Relief washes over me and I try to tell my heart to slow down.

Lane immediately drops her bag and rushes over to me, “Oh my God, Lacey. What’s wrong?” she asks desperately.

“Oh not much, other than having the privilege of meeting the bitch. Sorry mom! The slut who Caine has been screwing behind my back for God knows how long,” I tell her in disbelief.

“What?” she asks shocked. “How did you find out?" I give her a look sure to make her rethink that statement. "Did this happen at the gala?”

“Um yes. You should have seen it, Lane. The slut came right up to Caine while I was on his arm and planted her whore lips on him in front of everyone. She didn’t have a problem with
anyone witnessing it. I don’t know who she is. I know she’s not in the military because she was dressed in civilian clothes.” I take a moment to gather my thoughts. “Oh my God Lane, you should have seen her hideous dress. I bet she’s unhappily married and spreading her legs to whoever will pay her any attention,” I finish.

“What a man-whore. Oh, sorry mom!” Lane shakes her head. “You know,
last week when I was over at her house, Becca came to me and told me about what Lucas had told her.” I nod in understanding. Lane continues, “I really didn’t want to believe it. I’ve been waiting for the chance to watch how he acts around you, thinking I would be able to pick up on something, but he hasn’t been around this week. Looking back, I can’t see a period of time where he acted different from any other. Do you think this girl is the only one?”

I hadn't thought about the possibility of him cheating on me with more than one girl. I stare at her with incredulity. “I can’t think about that right now, Lane. You know what I don’t understand? She wasn’t that pretty. She was a puzzle butt
, but not good looking. What the hell?”

“Lacey, I hate to ask this
, and mom, please correct me if I'm wrong, but do you think you need to get tested to make sure he hasn’t spread anything?” I believe all of the color in my face has now drained. I feel weaker than before.

“That asshole better not have given me any disease or I’m taking his balls. You know what he had the audacity to say to me after the bitch... oh God, I’m sorry mom!” I say, closing my eyes placing my hand over my mouth. “After the slut kissed him, you know what he
said? He told me not to make a scene in front of his commanding officers. What a freaking dick wad... ugh. Sorry mom! He created this shituation. Sorry mom!” Becca would be so proud of me for using one of her words. “I cannot believe he thought he could just show up and talk his way out of this. Bullshit! Sorry mom! I’m done, I promise.” Mom looks at me with a raised eyebrow. "It's just so messed up."

Mom takes a deep breath. “I’m going to pray the reasoning behind your potty mouth is the emotional turmoil Caine put you through this evening. I hope my Lacey will be back when she wakes up tomorrow morning,” Mom says with a hint of reproach.

“Yes ma’am, I’m going to bed. Thanks for the tea mom. I don't know if it will be the cure, but thanks for trying. Good night,” I say, giving my mom a hug. “Goodnight Lane.” I squeeze her arm walking past her to my room. I pause just before I round the corner. "Lane, do you think I'm stupid for not listening to Becca? Do you know if Trish found out?”

"Seriously?” Lane asks. “Of course I don't think you’re stupid for thinking the best of people. You always see the greatest in people. You're the one who will stop on the side of the road to help an abandoned or injured animal. You're the one who will go to McDonald's to feed the homeless guy on the side of the road when everyone else thinks he's scamming. You're the one who sees the kid being bullied by his peers and will try to put a smile on their face. Everybody falls in love with you because of your heart. You are selfless and far from stupid. It sucks that people take advantage of your kindness. It doesn't matter who knows. Caine is the one in the wrong - not you. Becca was worried she upset you by mentioning the whole thing Lucas told her. She wanted to make sure you weren't mad, that's the only reason she told me. Trish was in the room, but she doesn't think you're any more stupid than you were before Becca gave you the news." She smiles, waiting for me to catch on.

"Ha, ha. I'm serious! But I appreciate it and thank you for the reassurance. I love you." I give her a hug and walk to my room.

Once my head hits the
pillow, my fit of tears comes back with a vengeance. I loved him so much. Damn I still do. How can he do this to me? How do I stop loving him?
Bastard.
My phone buzzes and out of habit, I grab it. It’s from Caine.

Caine
:  Friday 11:24pm:
Lacey, I am so sorry baby. Please don’t leave me. I love you!

I want
the darkness to swallow me. My phone buzzes again. Why the hell won’t he just leave me alone? Hasn’t he done enough?

Caine
:  Friday 11:25pm: 
Lacey, I feel like the worst person in the world. I’m so sorry and promise to never do it again. Please forgive me.

My eyes water more and I’m feeling so weak from the pain of losing him to that bitch. He’s sorry?

Caine:  Friday 11:26pm: 
I’m heartbroken without you. I don’t know what to do other than apologize and tell you how much you mean to me. I love you, Lacey!

He did not just say the word ‘love’
. Ugh. I don’t want to be reminded. Another freaking text?

Caine
:  Friday 11:27pm: 
I’ll do whatever it takes to keep you in my arms. I feel horrible and I know you may never forgive me but please Lacey, I’m begging you to accept my apology. I love you so much!

If he loved me so much, why did he allow someone else to be in his arms? Was h
e thinking about me when he was with her? Fuck no, he didn’t think of me at all! If he did, he wouldn’t have been able to go through with it much less do it again and God knows how many more times and with whom else. I’m so mad that he threw us away. How could he?
Asshole.
OMG, another text?

Caine
:  Friday 11:28pm: 
I know I’m a jerk. I’m sorry. You are the girl of my DREAMS. I love you.

I barely caught his signature
before I sat up and threw the phone against the wall. I cannot take any more of his lies! He’s not going to change. A cheater will always be a cheater! At least I don’t have to worry about him calling or texting anymore. By the looks of the million shiny plastic and metal pieces scattered on my floor, I think my phone is out of commission. Jumping out of bed, I start ripping up all the pictures of us that litter my room. I don’t want any reminders of that asshat. He had me. He had his chance and he threw our relationship out the door. I cannot forgive him. After tearing apart my room in an attempt to get rid of any remaining evidence of our relationship, I fall on my bed like a sack of potatoes and begin crying again. I hate him!