Authors: Megan Squires
“Maggie,”
Ran groans against my mouth. His fingers twist in my hair as his strong hand
cups the back of my head. I grip onto him tighter and he lifts up to allow more
room as he lowers and slides me onto my back. My hair presses against the
pillow and I gaze up at him with expectant, wide eyes. He looks down at me, searching
every part of me. “You are so beautiful, love,” Ran whispers against my cheek,
his mouth placing full, warm kisses across it. I lose all of my senses when he
pins my earlobe between his teeth and I feel his ragged breath on my skin. I
don’t know if it’s by accident that he calls me love, but it does something to
me that makes me want to burst into tears.
I angle
my neck into him and close my eyes as Ran lowers his body to me. The sheets
tangle around us and he runs his hands up and down my arms, stroking from my
fingertips up to my collarbone in soft, sweeping motions. My own fingers travel
down the tight muscles of his back to his waist, and I tug his hips to me.
Releasing
my earlobe, he slides his mouth back onto mine, just as I part my lips and a
sigh escapes from within me. Ran’s tongue slips into my open mouth and glides
along it, tenderly exploring every part of it. My body tenses, and I pull in a
deep, chilled breath through my nose, and move my mouth and tongue in response
to his guiding motions. It’s not the ravenous kiss I’m used to
experiencing—the one where it’s all about getting something from the
other person, about escalating things quickly to get to the inevitable point that
is the destination and real reason for the obligatory kissing to begin with.
Kissing
Ran is nothing like that. It’s not like this is some required action that will
lead to what we’re really here for. Instead, it’s as though each second with
his lips on mine is its own, mind-altering experience and not just a necessary
step that leads to something else. But not that I don’t want it to. Just not
now, not yet. I want to do things in the right order, because that’s how we
work. That’s what Ran wanted, and I realize that’s exactly what I’ve always
wanted, too. I want to do things right, and it wasn’t right to shut him out for
the past six months. The way his lips hungrily, yet affectionately, pull at
mine seems to indicate we’re making up for that lost time.
“Thank you,”
Ran whispers, “for letting me back in, Maggie.” He closes his mouth over mine
once more, and even though it’s the most delicate, light kiss possible, my
fingers and toes tingle with desire.
I press
a firm kiss to him in response and apologize, “I’m so sorry for shutting you
out for so long.” Skimming my hand up his spine, I coil my fingers in his hair.
“Thank you for not giving up on me.”
“I
couldn’t give up,” Ran says as he leaves a kiss on the tip of my nose. “I have
the right to love just as much as anyone else. I would have done anything in my
power to get that back.” He flips onto his side and pulls me over to him, the
length of our bodies pressing into the mattress. Ran reaches down for the
covers that are twisted around our legs and draws them up to our shoulders so
we’re tucked under them together. He’s warm and I’m feverish, but I press my
cheek into his chest and he rests his chin on the top of my head, not minding
the heat, but wanting more. “I had every intention of storming over here and demanding
it back from you. You made it so hard these past six months. What changed
tonight?”
“Nothing,”
I say, shaking my head slightly. His eyes tighten like he’s trying to
understand. “Nothing about you changed. Nothing about
us
changed.” I run my fingers over his chest, feeling his heart
underneath their tips. It’s slow, methodic, and assuring. “We might have lost
those two months, but we didn’t lose
us.
”
I sigh into the fabric of his shirt. “I fell in love with you fast, and I fell
in love with you forever. Even though that time was stolen from us, the way I
love you never could be taken.” Ran tightens his arms around me and I glance up
into his eyes and say, “I just hope you’re able to fall in love with me again
as easily as you did before.” Guarding myself—just like I always
do—I drop my head back onto his chest and bury myself against it.
Like
I’ve spoken something I shouldn’t, Ran’s frame goes rigid. It just makes me
hold onto him tighter, because I can’t allow the chance for him to slip away
again. I grip onto him desperately, with everything I have. “That can’t
happen,” Ran says quietly after too much silence. “I can’t fall in love with
you again, Maggie.”
I don’t
allow myself to register the words right away, and before I even begin
processing them, Ran says, “Because that would mean there was a time that I
fell out of love with you.” He kisses my forehead. “And that never happened.”
My legs, my knees, my body—everything is weightless. “I fell fast, and I
fell forever, too.”
We stay
like this, curled in each other’s arms, exchanging the same air and emotion for
the remainder of the night. At some point I think I sleep, but it’s hard to
tell because my dreams and my reality slip back and forth as I envision his
lips on mine, and then awake to the authenticity of their pressure and heat
against my skin. For hours we lay there, only stirring to exchange “I love
you’s” and the assurance of our presence through kisses that don’t take away or
replace the memories of the past ones, but build upon the others, adding to
them, just like Ran once said I added to him.
I’m almost asleep again when Ran’s low
voice breaches the stillness. “So I have one more condition for you.” He
strokes his fingers across my scalp. He’s been doing that for hours and it’s
the most calming, soothing thing I’ve ever experienced.
I shake
the sleep from my head. “Condition?”
“Yes,”
he smiles. “For your forgiveness.”
“My
forgiveness?”
A breath
of a laugh slips from his mouth. “Yeah, I still have to forgive you for almost
throwing away the best thing that ever happened to either of us. And I’ll do
that, but under one condition.”
I love
the playfulness in his voice and know full well that I’m forgiven—his
lips and words have already made that quite clear. But I go along with his
game.
“You’re
quite a little thief, you know that?” Ran’s fingers slide along the edge of my
shirtsleeve and he tugs at the hem. “You stole my shirt; you stole the last six
months. You a klepto, Maggie?”
I tuck
my arms under his and press against him, nuzzling his solid chest. He smells so
good. I don’t think I could ever get enough of his smell, even if it’s all I
ever breathed. “It’s not nice to call people names, Ran.”
“Is that
so? Because I believe you had a lengthy list of ones for me, if I remember
correctly. But in all fairness, I
don’t
actually remember correctly.”
An
unrestricted laugh bursts out of me. God, I love this man.
“So,
since I’m not going to turn you in for all the stealing you’ve done, I’ve got a
compromise.” Ran grins down at me, flashing that sexy smile of his I’m helpless
against. “You owe me two months.”
I tilt
my head up.
“For two
months of your summer break, you’re mine. All sixty days. Twenty-four seven.”
His eyes lure me with their bright gleam.
“And
what are you going to do with me for those two months?” I cock my head coyly.
“I can
think of a few things.” Ran smiles and lifts up his brow. “And I believe we
already have a list of adventures in case we run out of ideas.” He slouches
down so we’re face-to-face and seals his mouth on mine. His tongue teasingly
curls along the edge of my lips. “But somehow, I don’t think we’ll run out of
ideas, because all I want to do is live my life with you, Maggie. If we just
sat and stared at each other for two months straight, that would be enough.”
“No it
wouldn’t,” I say, shaking my head. “Because two months with you could never be
enough.” His lips shed a smile and I smother it with my mouth. “I want
forever.”
“You’ve
got it, love.” Ran folds me into his chest and pulls me close. “But just so you
know, it was always yours.”
Megan Squires lives with her husband
and two children just outside of Sacramento, California.
A graduate from the University of
California, Davis, Megan is now a full-time mother, wife, and dreamer—though
her characters don’t often give her much opportunity to sleep.
To follow Megan, or to connect online,
visit:
www.facebook.com/MeganSquiresAuthor
Maggie and Ran’s Story Continues in
RANSOM’S
NOTE
coming early 2014