Dance of Desire (45 page)

He gently propelled her backward, against a semi- submerged rock. The water lapped just below her breasts. As he broke the kiss, he pressed his forehead against hers and stared down at the luscious swell of flesh so close within reach.

His.

Knotting his fingers into her hair, he tipped her head back. She laughed, and he sensed her heavy-lidded gaze upon him as he laved and kissed her satiny neck, her collarbone, the hollow of her throat. Little gasps burst from her lips. When he cupped her breasts in his hands, she groaned.

Madness shot through him. He had to have her. He coaxed her up out of the water. Followed her, dripping, onto the sunny rock. Urged her to lie on her back. This time, she smiled up at him with understanding and anticipation. When he thrust into her, she cried out with her own need.

He took her with care. Thoroughness. Watched the pleasure bloom on her face. Cherished each of her cries and moans, before taking his release. He loved her, as his soul mate deserved to be loved.

Afterward, he lay beside her on the rock, his eyes closed, one hand splayed on her belly. He lost himself in the lap of water, the drone of dragonflies, and his utter contentment.

She sighed, a thoughtful sound. "Tell me about her."

Fane roused from near slumber to crack open one eye. A chill skittered through him. Did she ask about Leila?

"Who, love?" He feigned a yawn, and prayed his sleepiness would deter her questions.

"The Saracen courtesan. The one you met in the east."

A silent oath exploded in Fane's mind. He had no wish to discuss Leila with Rexana. Not now.

The chill slipped deep into his soul. If he told Rexana the truth, it might change how she felt about him. He might lose her.

He wet his lips with his tongue. "Rexana."

Turning onto her side, she braced her head on one hand. Her legs brushed against his. "I wish
to . . . I
must know if the rumors are true."

He fought to keep the edge from his voice. "Why? The past is the past."

Looking down, she traced a furrow in the rock. "I still want to know."

He rolled onto his back. The rock's warmth seeped into his skin. The earthy scent of sun-baked stone filled his nostrils, taunted him with memories of merciless desert heat and what seemed a lifetime ago.

His gut whined. He did not have to tell her. He could fabricate a tale, tell her only what he thought she wanted to hear. Yet, he hated the thought of deceiving her. His soul mate, of all people, deserved to know the truth.

"She was very beautiful," he began. As he spoke, Leila's olive-skinned, dark-eyed image filled his mind. He remembered her fragrance, sultry as incense. "She was General
Gazir's
favorite courtesan."

Rexana's gaze darkened. "And yours?"

Fane smiled, but could not ignore the sadness piercing through him. "Your jealousy is ill placed, love. Leila is dead."

As though sensing his inner turmoil, Rexana fell quiet. Yet, he saw countless questions burning in her eyes.

"General
Gazir
ruled a fortress not far from Acre," Fane said. "He paid allegiance to Saladin, whom King Richard defeated at Acre."

She nodded. "I heard of Saladin."

"I went to the holy land long before King Richard. I had joined his crusade, but was starved for adventure." A tight laugh broke from him. "As you have probably heard, my father disowned me. I had no land, no coin, so I could scarce feed myself. I could not wait to leave England."

"Oh, Fane," she whispered.

"I proposed that some fellow crusaders and I go on ahead to spy on the Saracens, and gather information for when the king arrived at Acre. He agreed. We left soon afterward. After many setbacks, we reached the shores near Acre, but were attacked. Most were slaughtered. A few of us were captured and sent to
Gazir's
dungeon." The stench of the eastern hell pit roused in Fane's mind, and he shuddered. "We were chained. Beaten. Tortured."

Her gaze softened. She stared at his scars, and inside, he curled up into a ball. He felt exposed, as though he bared not only his marred flesh, but his soul.

"Go on," she said gently.

Steeling emotion from his voice, he said, "One by one, the others went mad or died. I refused to surrender. I refused to abandon faith in my king or hope of escape. There were nights, though, that I longed for oblivion."

"How did you survive?"

Fane looked up at Rexana. Her fair skin glowed. Her loosened hair, flowing over the rock, had almost dried in the sun's heat. She looked fresh, innocent, the very opposite of Leila's blatant sensuality.

"Without Leila, I would not have lived." Rexana's eyes flared with shock, but he pressed on. "The first time I saw her, she had come to the dungeon out of sheer curiosity. She wanted to see the Christian knight who was too stubborn to die. I remember lying in my cell and hearing bells. I thought angels had come for me. I opened my eyes to see her outside the bars. Her costume glittered like stars on a clear winter night." He rubbed his lips together. "Soon, she visited every day. She brought ointments and oils and tended my wounds."

"General
Gazir
let her?"

Brutal shivers raked down Fane's spine. "As the months passed, I grew in value to him. In his own twisted way, I vow he admired my struggle. He ordered Leila to treat me so I would survive." He fought the memory of
Gazir's
mocking laughter. "On the days he met with visiting dignitaries, he ordered me brought to his chambers, chained like an animal. He gloated. Called me the pale skinned English beast. Hauled me around by my chains and showed me off like a prized trophy."

"How cruel!"

Fane struggled to shut out Rexana' pity, and his own suppressed rage. "
Gazir
did not realize Leila and I had learned to communicate. One day, when I was strong enough, she would help me escape. I would take her with me, so she would be free from
Gazir
."

"Word by word, she taught me Arabic. While she treated my scarred body, she kept my mind focused on survival. Soon, I understood what my prison guards were saying. And, I understood the conversations between
Gazir
and his peers."

Rexana smiled. "An advantage, for a spy."

He nodded. "One day, I heard my guards talking about a Christian king's boats being sighted near Acre. I wept with relief. Yet, I also realized I could best serve my king from within the dungeon. I wrote down what I heard on scraps of parchment Leila smuggled beneath her veil. She delivered these to secret messengers who in turn took the information to the crusaders. Many of
Gazir's
subjects, I learned, despised him." Fane pointed to Rexana's hand. "The sapphire ring you wear was Leila's. She used it to identify herself to her messengers."

Rexana turned the gleaming ring on her finger. "I see."

"When King Richard's forces advanced on Acre," he continued, "my position became very dangerous.
Gazir
threatened to cut off my head and deliver it to the king as proof the crusaders would never win.
Gazir
summoned his armies to support Saladin, and plotted an attack. Each time Leila left to deliver a message, I feared for her life. I knew if she were caught, she would die a horrible death. We agreed I must escape.

"One night, she drugged the guards and unlocked my cell. She helped me don eastern robes, then led me through the servants' passages. I could hardly walk, but she urged me on. We hurried into the city. There, we heard the shouts of alarm."

He swallowed, the desperation of that night pulsing afresh inside him. "We ran through the market into the streets. We could not stop or we would die. Leila took me to the house of one of her contacts. We hid in a tiny, secret room under the floor for two days, until
Gazir
recalled his guards from the city." He exhaled. "Escaping the dungeon was a tremendous moment in my life, yet I was also scared beyond reason.
Gazir
could still find us. He would not be merciful. Leila . . . understood."

Rexana's lashes flicked down. "You mean, you coupled."

Fane stared down at the rock. He had never told anyone what had happened between him and Leila. Yet Rexana, of all people, deserved to know. He prayed she would not loathe him.

"She begged me to lie with her. I will not speak false, Rexana. I desired her. I had not been with a woman in months, and I owed her my life. Would you not have done the same, if you thought you might not live one more day?"

To his relief, Rexana's gaze did not harden with disgust. She swallowed and looked out across the water, as though deciding what to make of his words.

"We coupled only once. 'Twas not love." He caught her fingers, picking at a ridge of stone. " 'Twas not at all what I shared with you."

A breath shivered from her. "I will try to believe you."

" '
Tis
the truth."

"Please, tell me the rest."

He squeezed her hand, forced himself to tell the story to its wretched end. "At dark, Leila and I left for the city gates. Half way there, she handed me her ring and a dagger she had stolen— the jeweled one I still use —and told me where to find a horse. She told me to ride to my king, for she would come at dawn. I tried to stop her from returning to
Gazir's
castle, but she refused to listen." He paused, his throat raw. "She kissed me, then ran into the darkness. That was the last time I saw her alive."

"
Gazir
found her," Rexana said, her words hushed.

Fane nodded. "When she did not appear the next day, I asked to speak with the king. He had received my missives and knew of the threat
Gazir
posed. He assigned me an army of knights and we thundered into the city. We besieged the fortress. In the main hall, I found
Gazir
holding a knife to Leila's neck. She had freed the other courtesans and poisoned his wine before trying to flee, but he had caught her. He knew that she had freed me."

A violent tremor tore through Fane's body. "I tried to save her. I could not stop him. He slit her throat." His voice shook. "I cut his head from his shoulders."