Authors: Bruce Bethke
&
D
estroy. Along about the first of September--after I was long gone--
it’d start eating his files. But do it in such a random-like way it’d take
him
weeks
to figure out it was the program, not him.
Aside from sucker-trapping the Apple, what else was there? Only
Space War, the lamest game in creation. Ultra-crude graphics, no sound
to speak of, no hit points or charisma or
anything
interesting. It was just
pure logistics. Sometimes Lewellyn and I played each other one-on-one
or two-on-two; most of the time he was busy, so I split up control of the
four nations/empires/whatever with that little dim computer and wished
it had enough smarts to learn from watching me.
Each player built ships, launched attacks, and tried to take over other
star systems. All sides had the same level of technology, so the whole
game really came down to one question: Who controlled the most
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production capacity? If you could destroy the other empires’
manufacturing centers and protect your own, you won. No exceptions.
Geez, even the Academy’s war game was better than that!
After a while I figured out that there were a couple hardcodes in the
game, made it real predictable. No luck factors, no randomization, no
technological leaps. Surprise counted a little, but not much; coordination
counted more. Massing a fleet and
then
attacking always worked better
than launching small units and trusting everyone to arrive at the
objective at the same time. It always took at least three-to-one numerical
superiority to overwhelm an entrenched defender, and two-front wars
were always disastrous. Most importantly, I had to
manually
keep track
of what I’d deployed, because otherwise the little idiots’d just follow
orders and I’d wind up watching reinforcements get slaughtered
following up lost causes.
Once I’d finally flagged the last of the hardcodes, the game got
boring to the max. So one day I started tearing the program apart and
improving the code, just for the hell of it. I added valor; I added random
space monsters that could eat ships in transit. By the end of July I’d
reworked Space War into true fun, and the only untouched spot in the
whole thing was a little glop of hex up in the initialization section which
I assumed was the original programmer’s ID.
One Sunday I decided to decode that, too, and redo it. I mean after
all, the program was mostly mine now, right? I tore into the hex,
converted it to ASCII, looked it over.
The original programmer was Ralph Lewellyn. And he’d written it
less that five years before.
“I was trying to impress the Colonel,” old Lewellyn said, when I
inquisitioned him about it. He had a weird, faraway look in his soft blue
eyes. “It was just after I was hired, son. The summer boys were doing
galley warfare that year, and I couldn’t believe the primitive way they
were conducting the games. So I decided to write a simulation using the
same rules.” Lewellyn looked at me, sad. “War never changes, you
know. The tools of the trade change, but the basic business never does.”
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I looked back at the star map on the video tube, and realized with a
start that a lot of the hardcodes closely matched the params of the
Peloponnesian War we were fighting on the sand table—and for that
matter, the basic rules of Peshawar. Sudden, it all clicked together.
Space War, Peshawar, and the ancient Greeks: it was all the same game.
“Well, son,” Lewellyn was rattling on, “Just about the time I
finished the program, I discovered that Colonel Von Schlager absolutely
hates
computers. Believes that they make it too easy to be detached and
emotionless; too easy to make command decisions that throw lives
away. That’s why you game on a sand table, in a closed room. The
Colonel’s theory is that you have to smell each other’s sweat, and feed
on each other’s excitement. You must—have you gotten to platoon-level
actions yet?” I shook my head. “Oh,” Lewellyn said. He took off his
glasses, rubbed the bridge of his nose, and then started cleaning his
glasses on his shirt tail. “I don’t know much about the Colonel’s past,”
he said at last, “but something terrible must have happened. When you
get to platoon-level actions, you’ll discover his Number Three rule:
Always look men in the face before you order them to their deaths
.”
Dim, slow, I started to remember something. About how I always
played a tank platoon in net Peshawar; about how I really
hated
those
anonymous net generals who sent me out to get killed. Hated them even
more than the enemy.
Lewellyn sighed heavy, and shook his head. “I often wonder what
tremendous guilt it is, that makes the Colonel the tortured thing he is
today.”
I was still processing what Lewellyn had said about platoon-level
actions. “The Number Three rule? What’s Number One?”
Lewellyn looked up at me, snorted a little laugh, and said, “The
Number One rule around here, son, is
Keep Your Head Down.
I carry
that one close to my heart! The Colonel took one look at Space War,
said, ‘Don’t ever show that to me again,’ and I didn’t. As a result, I still
have my job!” He smiled, and made a hands-up gesture with his crooked
old fingers that took in the room and everything. “You have to admit
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that this isn’t a bad way for a retired widower to live, don’t you?
Beautiful country, all the bland food I can eat, and all the books I can
read. My kids wanted to put me in a nursing home.”
His eyes suddenly focused on something only he could see, and the
look on his face turned so bad I thought he was sick, at first. Then I
realized there were tears coming up in the corners of his eyes. “You
have no idea what it was like before,” he said, soft. “Ninety million
aging Anglo voters, all voting for people who promised us Guaranteed
Medical for the rest of our lives, all demanding the absolute best for
ourselves. We turned the world upside down: welfare recipients became
walking organ banks. Immigration for sale, if you were willing to donate
a kidney. The second class citizen ghettos, the Evolution At Work
policies.” He sobbed, shuddered.
“It took my wife five years to die,” he said, not really to me. “The
home kept her body alive
years
after what should have been a fatal
stroke, trying new procedures, attempting useless surgery. So they could
keep collecting her MediMaint payments, you see? It wasn’t a hospital;
it was a warehouse for dying bodies.” His voice dropped to a whisper.
“When I go, I want it to be here. Where the medical vultures can’t get
one last insurance billing out of me.”
Lewellyn shook his head, snapped back into focus, and looked at
me. “I suppose this must be pretty morbid for you, son. If you don’t
mind, I think I’ll just... “ He got up, and started for the door.
Then he thought of something, and turned around. “Say, you
remember how I said that I always find my best ideas by accident, while
looking for a different book?” I nodded. He turned to a shelf, and picked
up a fat old dustcatcher. “I was looking for a book on Shiloh,” he said,
“when I found this for
you
. I think you’ll find it useful.” Tossing the
book to me, he turned and toddled out the door.
I looked at it a while, running my fingers over the cracked old
leather. This sucker was old! Silverfish bait, for sure; the pages were
practically flaking apart. No name on the binding, and no cover art. I
could almost
feel
boredom seeping in through my fingers.
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But what the hell, the old guy meant well. I opened the cover and
looked at the title page.
A History of the Peloponnesian War
, adapted
from Thucydides by Reverend somebody-or-other. Feeling a little
excitement, I flipped to the index. Yup, it was all there: Names, dates,
tactics.
I turned back to the tube, and looked at Space War. I couldn’t quite
ID the feeling, but at last I decided there was something
wrong
about
taking Lewellyn’s name out of the program. Sure, he was a putz. The
original code was mediocre, at best. But he meant well. He was really
trying to help. Sure, there probably weren’t ten more computers in the
whole world this thing’d run on, but it didn’t seem fair to erase him
completely.
I settled for changing the ID and adding one line. Now it said,
“Original program design by Ralph Lewellyn. Mods by Mikey Harris.”
That’d make him happy, I figured; seeing his program mature into
something
good
.
While I was making a backup of the new code for Mr. Lewellyn, my
FID bomb fired. A month early. Trashed both the source and target
copies; a month of work on Space War shot to hell. All that was left was
Lewellyn’s original.
Guess I wasn’t as sharp on Apple II timing as I thought.
I spent the rest of the afternoon hunting down and destroying all the
suspect copies of FID. I was late for evening mess, and by the time I got
to the chow hall they were down to cold mashed potatoes, lima beans,
and breaded veal cutlets in congealed gravy. But I sat down, determined,
and ate it anyway.
Sometimes things are just your own damned fault.
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Chapter 0/F
By the first week of August, I had a choice: I could either zipper my
spatterzag jumpsuit shut, or I could breathe. While back home skinny
and pale was in, I had to admit that tanned muscle didn’t look that bad
on me. (Of course, my impersonation of tanned muscular arms still
looked like toastix compared to the jarheads.) I could jog five klicks
without breathing hard; I could put ten out of ten bullets in the 40mm
circle at 50 meters (prone position) and seven of ten from standing. I
could talk to Lewellyn for
hours
without him correcting my grammar.
The one thing I couldn’t do was win a battle for the Thebans.
By August, the game was getting truly complex. The soldiers —me,
Mr. Style, Stig, and Jankowicz—had direct control of troops at the
tactical level, and the generals just sat up at the top of the pyramid,
generalling, all their orders piped down to the troops through the
adjutant. (In the case of the Thebans, me.) Alliances had shifted, and
reshifted, and finally settled down into two basic sides—Sparta versus
Athens—with everybody but us and the Thracians committed to one side
or the other. Scott kept telling people we were free agents like it was a
big joke, but most of the time we wound up siding with Sparta, just
because I didn’t like Deke Luger’s superior attitude.
Hey, is there a
better
reason?
There’d been some shakeups in the armies. Luger had turned into