Read Country Crooner (Christian Romance) Online
Authors: Rebecca Lynn Clayson
I considered Kendra's point, and realized that she was right. I didn't have a problem getting first and second dates, but the idea of dating a guy long-term scared me... and by the third date, I often found a reason to not go out with the guy again.
I didn’t consider myself overly picky, but what was that they said? Once burned, twice shy.
Yes, I liked to date a lot, but not in a "slutty" way. I loved making lots of friends and I enjoyed the attention from the guys, but I was strict about the not allowing the physical relationship to progress too far.
I considered myself to be a good Mormon girl, and as such, had made the choice to abstain from sex before marriage. My physical boundaries hadn’t really been a problem with Keaton, as he was also a Mormon and shared my beliefs. Looking back on it, there were a lot of times where he seemed more interested in reaching the next level of his video game than in me. I was just an ornament and someone to get him another soda when he needed it.
I made my commitment to remain chaste as a young girl and had stayed true to it throughout my teenage years and early twenties. I was still committed to keep my vow of chastity until I was married, but that didn't mean that I couldn't date or have fun. I had no problem with kissing a guy or holding his hand, and I loved snuggling up together to talk or watch a movie.
There were some guys that weren't a good match to date, because they didn't share the same values as me. The few times I tried dating guys that didn’t share my beliefs, I felt like I had to be constantly on my guard and really couldn’t enjoy myself because they were looking to take the physical relationship to a level that I was not comfortable with. I found that if I stuck to dating guys that shared my values, our time together was a whole lot more relaxed and enjoyable.
Because I was looking for guys who had similar values and beliefs, the instant effect was the minimizing of my dating pool of choice. However, I didn't mind, because the area where I lived had many eligible bachelors who shared the same religious views. Church and church activities were a great place to meet guys who respected my beliefs.
I redirected my thoughts back to the current conversation with Kendra. "I could find a guy that I really liked if I put my mind to it. There are plenty of great guys out there; I just don't want to risk having one of them buying me a diamond ring."
"Really?" she said sarcastically. "You think that you could commit to one guy for a little while?" Kendra winked at me, with a challenging tone in her voice.
"Of course I could, if it was the right guy," I responded confidently. I knew that I could do anything if I put my mind to it.
"I don't know, I think that it would be too much for you to hang out with the same guy more than a few times." Sarcasm continued to drip from Kendra's voice, "The second date is when most of them are put on the chopping block, if they even make it past the first date."
I thought about what Kendra was saying. Yes, she was teasing and challenging me at the same time, but there was definitely truth to what she was saying.
Could I really commit to a guy for a short period of time, knowing that it didn't have to turn into a long-term relationship? Could I have fun and hang out with one guy without it getting too serious? What qualities would the guy need to have to keep me from placing them on the chopping block?
Kendra stopped walking, turned abruptly to face me, and placed her hands on her hips. "In fact, I
bet
you couldn't stick with a boyfriend right now, even if you wanted to," she challenged.
I liked to believe that I could, although I hesitated at the idea of any type of commitment to one guy. The dating game was too much fun right now. Why should I give it up for a silly bet?
But the motivation that I was feeling was based on Kendra's challenge, and my competitive edge was nudging me to prove her wrong. Kendra knew me well enough to understand that throwing a challenge out at me was like shaking a bone at a dog. I just couldn’t resist.
"I'll accept your bet. We’ll pick a guy and I'll get him to be my boyfriend. I’ll need some time to get him to ask me out, so that I can work my magic."
"Hmmm, sounds interesting," Kendra commented. "Will I get to have a say in who the guy is? It has to be someone that you've never met. And there has to be a deadline on the bet."
"I guess we can plan it that way. But, it needs to be a decent guy, someone who is cute and not crazy or weird." We had a similar taste in guys, but I didn't want Kendra challenging me to date an awkward guy just because she would have fun watching me squirm through the whole experience.
"Ok, we'll make sure that he's decent," Kendra agreed. "We've got an activity on Monday night at park next to the church, I'm sure you could find someone there."
Kendra and I were both members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, also known as "Mormons" in popular culture. The congregation that we attended was for single college students, and they had weekly activities that we often attended. Our congregation was referred to as a "ward" within the church, and several wards in the area were part of a larger area known as a "stake." On Monday, there was a big stake activity with several singles wards involved, so there was a pretty good chance that I would have the opportunity to meet new guys.
"Ok, that sounds like a plan. I need at least a week to get him to ask me out though."
"That's fair. Here's the bet: we’ll pick a guy on Monday night. You’ll have seven days to get him to ask you out, and then you’ll need to go out with him at least a total of five times within the following two weeks. During that two-week time, you can't go out with ANY other guys"
I considered her offer, knowing that it would be challenging to complete. "That sounds like mission impossible to me, but I think that I can do it. We need some type of wager, to make it a real bet. What do you think?"
"If you fail, then you have to buy me that new iPhone I've been wanting!" Kendra smiled mischievously, hinting that she was excited for a new phone.
"Whoa, you're serious about this bet, aren't you? Deal. But, if I'm successful, then you have to buy
me
a new phone. Five dates is a lot though, I dunno..."
"Aw, come on. I know that you can get any guy that you want. The challenge is about whether or not you’ll be willing to hang out with him for a few weeks." Kendra's response was encouraging and challenging at the same time, we were good enough friends that she knew exactly what to say to get me to commit.
"I can do it, but I'm not making any promises after the bet is completed. You have to agree that I have the option to walk away from the relationship after the five dates are done." As I spoke, I was trying to convince myself and explain it to her at the same time.
"We'll call it the boyfriend bet. This is going to be fun!" She stuck out her little finger and latched onto my little finger, sealing our bet with a "pinky-swear".
We walked into the church building and took our seats for the first meeting. I tried to concentrate on the gospel messages that were being shared, but my mind was preoccupied with the bet that I had just made.
There was no doubt in my mind that I could get the first date lined up, I was a pro when it came to getting guys to ask me out. The follow-up dates were my concern.
I had stayed away from serious relationships for so long that I felt a little anxious about spending so much time with one guy. Could I do it without getting hurt in the process?
Eventually, I reassured myself with the fact that it was
only
two weeks of dating, and I didn't have to commit to anything after that. It would be a fun experiment, although I wasn't sure how comfortable I felt about leading a guy on if I wasn't really interested in him. It wasn't fair to him to be in a relationship with me just so I could prove Kendra wrong.
But the challenge had been made, and I loved competition. Anyway, all’s fair in love and war, right?
I reasoned that I could go out with the guy several times and take things slow. There was no need to make him think that I was completely committed to the relationship.
Even though I didn't know exactly who the guy would be or how the dating would go, I knew deep down that it would be fine. I had to prove Kendra wrong, and I knew that I could do anything that I put my mind to.
This was an excerpt from the book, "
The Boyfriend Bet
." Download the book on Amazon to continue reading: