Color Me Blind (A Divine Love Story Book 1) (10 page)

Chapter 15: What Lies Beneath

 

 

Jasmine met with Frank’s doctor so she could discus
s being tested as a possible kidney match.  She didn’t know how long it would take but she was told she had to be tested for a blood match, tissue match and cross-matching.  She didn’t know what all of it meant but she did know it sounded like too much to go through for satan’s first born. 

Dr. Williams was a fifty-
something mixed race man that had features more loyal to his Anglo Saxon ancestry but his skin tone told the rest of the story.  After he discussed all the medical jargon and the process of being a donor he sat back in his chair with his hands steeped on his chin and got silent.  The way he looked at her he was starting to make her feel weird. 

She asked
, “Is there something wrong?” 

He looked like he was unsure of what he was about to say. 

“I don’t want to offend you but the curiosity is a bit tempting.” 

She knew this old
man was not about to hit on her. If he did she was about to go slap off. 

He went on, “If I can just step out of the prof
essional for one moment and ask,  how do you, a beautiful, intelligent and obviously compassionate sista, fit into the family in room 103 that is obviously headed by a patriarch that likely still has ties to the Klan?” 

Jasmine let out the breath she was holding with a laugh. 

“Oh, is that all?”  This she could handle.  “Well, I’m the best friend of the son. We’ve been as thick as thieves since we were ankle biters, much to the chagrin of Frank.  Oh, and I adore his mother.” 

Dr. Williams laughed. 

“Oh, so much is starting to make sense now.” 

She gave him a quizzical look, “Like what?” 

“Well, now I understand why the redhead kept cutting her eyes when the son mentioned you.” 

“Amber
was cutting her eyes about me?  I can’t imagine why. Blake and I are just friends.  She knows that. They’ve been together for quite a while now.  She’s met my boyfriend.  You must have misread the situation.”

Dr. Williams looked at her like she was insane
.  How can someone seemingly so intelligent be having such a stupid moment?  He opted to leave it there and get back to the kidney. 

“Ms. Monroe.” 

“Call me Jasmine please.” 

“Ok
ay Jasmine, I just want you to understand what it is you’re doing.  This is a major medical procedure, not to mention the emotional aspects involved.  I know this ultimately isn’t my business, but why are you doing this?” 

She mumbled,
“Because God has a sick sense of humor.” 

“Come again?” 

“Look, I don’t expect you to understand this but trust me when I say I know that I will be a match for him.  Even though his life isn’t important to me, it is important to someone who I care very deeply about.  This is the right thing to do.  I’m young, I’m healthy and I will be okay.  If I don’t help him, Frank won’t be.” 

Dr. Williams had seen a lot of things in the two decades that he had practiced medicine.  But this one definitely ranked high on the list
of the strange ones. They scheduled an appointment for her to come the next day to take all the tests.  He told her it would be two weeks to get the results.  Then they could schedule the surgery if she was a match. 

She got up to leave
when he said, “Just one last thing.” 

“What’s that?” 

“What makes you think he will accept your kidney?” 

She smirked, “Oh he will accept it because after his initial temper tantrum his pride and vanity will win ou
t. He’s too mean to die.  I’m sure he knows even the Grimm Reaper doesn’t want him.” 

With that she walked out and prepared to face her arch
nemesis.

She walked back by the
nurse’s station to give herself another moment.  She had been here for almost an hour.  She knew Blake was going to come and look for her soon.  She so was not in the mood for Frank and his antics today.  As a matter of fact she figured she would be more likely to give him her kidney if she could just not see him until the surgery.  This time the nurse’s station was full with nurses busying themselves.  She was searching for Nurse Ashley when she felt a tap on her shoulder from behind.  Jasmine smiled as she turned to see Nurse Ashley. 

“Hey, did you get all your questions answered?” 

“Yeah I did.  I’m going to be tested tomorrow and I’m trying to get my mind right to go in his room.” 

Nurse Ashley
laughed, “Well blue-eyes came out here asking about you.  I told him you had to handle something that came up but said you would be back any minute now.” 

“Okay thanks.  How long ago was that?” 

“About fifteen minutes ago.” 

“I hate lying to him and I’m sorry you had to but…” 

“But this is something you had to do because you don’t want any hopes to get up until you know for sure.  I understand, and I didn’t lie. Something did come up.” 

Jasmine smiled, “You know what?
I like you.  I hope you like me because I may need an ally when I go down in the trenches.” 

Nurse Ashley
laughed and waved as Jasmine headed to Frank’s room.

Jasmine
stood at the door and took a deep breath before she entered.  She knocked lightly and then opened the door.  When she stepped in she saw Frank.  He looked so frail and sad.  She felt the pity in her belly begin to stir for him.  Blake stood up and stole her attention.  His eyes were still red and he looked tired. 

“Hey Jaz
, where you been?” 

“I’m sorry sweetie.
I had a few things to deal with.” 

“Is everything alright,” he asked with concern. 

“Yeah, it’s fine, I will tell you about it later.” 

She saw Amber stand and reach for Blake’s hand as he was headed towards her.  She was reminded about what Dr. William’s said but
discharged it as silly.  She walked over to Lisa and leaned down to kiss her cheek. 

“How are you doing ma?” 

“I’m hanging in there baby.  Thank you for coming.” 

Jasmine smiled and turned to look at Frank. 

With a wheeze he asked, “What are you doing here?  Get the hell out of this room. I don’t want to see you.” 

Jasmine wanted to spit in his face.  How can
he be that sick and that hateful?  He could barely get the horrible words out.  His skin was pale and pasty.  He looked like the living dead.  He had lost at least ten pounds since she had last seen him and his cheeks looked like someone took the air out of them.  Before she could respond Blake was at her side pulling her into his arms for a comforting hug. 

“Dad can you
please just stop it for once?  She’s here for me. She’s here because I need her here.” 

Hearing Blake’s words caused Amber’s lips to tighten and her fists to clench.  The reaction wasn’t lost on
Lisa but it wasn’t the time to address it.  As much as she had hoped Blake and Jasmine would be together, she knew they never would be.  As far as she was concerned they were perfect for each other, but if they themselves couldn’t see that then there was no point. 

Wearily Lisa
said, “Frank please, just stop!  Can you do that for me please?  Do it for me.  Jasmine you are welcome here. You are always welcome.  Don’t let the rants of a mean old man make you feel otherwise.” 

Jasmine said, “I’m used to it.  It’s not a problem.” 

She turned back to Frank and walked up to his bedside.  She deliberately placed her hand on his forearm knowing he was too weak to do anything about it.  He could see it in her eyes that she did it on purpose. 

She smiled sweetly, “Mr. Jessup
, I wish you a speedy recovery, but I will leave you with your family now.  I’m so sorry to have upset you.” 

She turned to face
Lisa, “Ma, call me later tonight okay.” 

Lisa
smiled, “Okay.  Bye baby.” 

Jasmine waved bye to Amber and asked Blake, “Walk me outside love?” 

Amber’s cheeks flushed red, but Blake refused to address it as he told her, “Be right back baby.”

Blake closed the door behind them as they stood in the hallway.  They were back in Nurse Ashley’s line of sight
, but they didn’t notice she was watching.  Blake hugged her again and laid his cheek in her mass of curls. 

“Thanks for coming Jaz.  I thought he would be too weak to argue with you
, but I guess not.” 

She laughed
bitterly, “It’s okay, but I can’t do this today.  If you want me to I will stay here and just hang out with Nurse Ashley but I can’t go back in that room without spitting in his face.” 

She thought she was over him.  She thought that she was numb to his antics but something very dark was forming in her heart for that man.  The truth was it hurt her to the core for him to perpetually show her that she wasn’t
worthy to be in his presence.  It seemed as though he hated her very existence and she couldn’t understand why. 

It hurt on a primal level to be looked at
as less than a human being and it frustrated her that he never even gave her character a chance.  It was especially disappointing now knowing what she was willing to give up just so he could continue living out his life of hate.  She wanted to cry, but she wouldn’t give him the satisfaction. She also didn’t want to put anything else on Blake’s plate to worry over. 

In that moment she reso
lved to let him have her kidney.  Only so she could torment him every single time he saw her.  She wanted his evil butt to know that this black woman was the reason he still had breath in his body. 

Every time he looked at the scar she wanted him to be reminded of her and she wanted him to suffer knowing it.
  Her black inferior organ would be giving life to his body.   He wouldn’t be able to argue with the science that she was now his equal.  Her kidney did the same thing his did.  She’d be sure to point out that fact on a regular basis to drive him insane.

Blake interrupted her hate-
filled vision, “No, you don’t have to do that.  I’ll be okay.  I’ll see you when I get home.  Thanks so much for being here.” 

She pushed pause on her pain for the moment, “Yeah I think it’s for the best because your dad isn’t the only one that doesn’t want me here.  I think Amber had her claws out.” 

He laughed, “Yeah I caught that.  I don’t know what that was about. This is her new thing, but most of the time I just ignore it.  Does Derrick give you the same hassles?” 

“No
, he’s never said anything to me about it.  I think he knows that I’m head over heels for him.” 

“Lucky you,
I wish Amber would realize the same.” 

“Okay love, I’m going to head to the house.  Call or text me if you need anything.” 

“I know Jaz.” 

He kissed her nose and ran his hand
s through her curls. 

“Bye B.  I’ll see you at home later.” 

He headed back into his father’s room.  Jasmine saw Nurse Ashley standing by the entrance. 


Ashley thanks for everything and all your help.  I’m sure I’ll see you again, but if not it was nice meeting you.” 

Ashley smiled, “It was nice meeting you too and I’m going to tell you this because I think you
simply don’t know.” 

Jasmine looked puzzled, “What’s that?” 

“You two are so very much in love with each other.  If you don’t believe that look at how he looks at Amber and then look at how he looks at you.  When you realize the difference, know that you look at him the exact same way.” 

Jasmine was used to people reading more into their friendship but she wasn’t in denial
.  There just wasn’t anything there and there never would be. 

She
responded, “Believe it or not, we get that all the time.  The truth is we are just friends.  We have never crossed that line and we never will.  He is with Amber and has been for a long time.  I have been with Derrick for about the same.  We are both very happy in our own relationships.  So I’m afraid I will have to disappoint you like we have to disappoint everyone else.  Blake and I are never going to happen.” 

Nurse Ashley
threw her hands up in surrender, “Okay, if you say so.” 

Jasmine said, “As a matter of fact, I do.” 

As Jasmine walked out the hospital, Nurse Ashley wondered was it possible to be completely head over heels in love with someone and genuinely not know it?  It was out of her hands now and into much bigger ones.  She had planted the seeds she had been assigned to plant.

 

 

 

 

Chapter 16:  Love Holds No Record of Wrongs

 

 

A
little over two weeks later Jasmine received a phone call from Dr. Williams asking her to come into the hospital so they could tell Frank they found a kidney donor, her.  Her emotions were all over the place and the only one she could pin down was relief to finally be able to move to the next step. 

Dr. Williams said the surgery was schedule
d for the next day because Frank was running out of time.  Oh my, wasn’t that incredibly soon? She hadn’t told anybody why but she had made preparations at her salon to be off for several weeks.  She explained that she had a family emergency she would need to see to although she still hadn’t even told her parents.  How would Blake react knowing she kept it from him?

When she stepped out of her office
the three stylists looked at her strangely.  She assumed too much of her emotions were plastered on her face.  There was no way she could change it though so she asked Lucy to come into the office.  Lucy excused herself for a moment from her client at the nail station and headed in. Jasmine closed the door. 

“Hey, what’s going on?
You look like that phone call wasn’t good news.” 

“Okay Luce look.
I know I’ve been acting strange and I wouldn’t tell you exactly why, just that I needed to take some time off.”

Lucy nodded nervously. 

“Well, the time has come and I have to leave now to go to the hospital to tell Frank I’m a match.”

Lucy looked confused.

“Luce, I’m having surgery tomorrow to give Frank one of my kidneys.” 

Lucy shrieked, “What!  Jasmine are you mental?” 

“Sh
hh.  Would you please calm down?” 

“Would you please give me a reason to calm down?” 

“Look I’m sorry, I didn’t tell anybody.  I didn’t even tell Blake. He is about to find out at the hospital.  I didn’t want anybody to know until I knew for sure I was a match.” 

“Jasmine there
is just so many things wrong with this picture I don’t even know where to begin.” 

“Look, I know
this is a lot to take in but this is just something I have to do.  It will have to be discussed later.  Please don’t tell them until we get home tonight.” 

Lucy
gawked at her incredulously. 

“I’m sorry
, but I have to go so can you get everything in order here that we’ve been planning? I’ll see you at home.  I’m sorry Luce but I have to go.” 

Lucy threw up her hands, “Whatever Jasmine.” 

Jasmine grabbed her purse and kissed Lucy on the cheek before she headed out.  She said her goodbyes to the staff.

Jasmine
arrived at the hospital beyond grateful to see Ashley’s smiling face.  She was standing near the nurse’s station away from the other nurses. 

“Well hey there.
Don’t you look all pretty today?” 

Jasmine looked down at her royal blu
e maxi dress and silver sandals.  She smiled, “Thanks.” 

“Are you
here to see blue eyes or his father?” 

“Um
, both actually.  I’m a match.” 

Nurse
Ashley said, “Oh, I see.  Well that must be why the doctor is headed this way.  Well, good luck in there.  I’m sure it will be colorful.” 

Jasmine smirked, “
I promise to give you a play-by-play if I make it out alive.”              

Nurse Ashley said, “Be warned, the redhead is in there.” 

Just then Dr. Williams came around the corner and said, “Oh good, you’re here.  Well let’s get this done.” 

Jasmine kind of winced.
Maybe this wasn’t the best plan she’d ever had.  Amber had been very testy these past couple of weeks.

As they headed
down the hallway for the short walk Dr. Williams asked, “Do you want to go in with me or do you want me to tell them we found a match and then you come in?” 

“I think the latter is the safest approach.” 

He laughed, “Self-preservation is likely to win over hate.  It will be okay.” 

Dr. Williams walked in and shut the door as
Jasmine stood in the hall biting her nails, something she never did.  Lucy would have a fit if she messed up her manicure.

With a smile Dr. Williams greeted Lisa, Blake, Amber and Frank. 

“Well folks, I have some great news.  We’ve found a kidney donor and we have the surgery scheduled for tomorrow afternoon.” 

Frank was too weak to give a verbal response but his eyes showed great
relief.  Lisa reached out for his hand and began to weep silent tears of gratitude.  Blake ran his hands through his hair as Amber rubbed his back. 

He
asked, “When did this happen? Is it one of us?” 

“No
, I’m sorry you and your mom were not a match, but we had another donor come in anonymously and get tested.  They wanted to remain anonymous just in case they weren’t a match.  That not being the case I guess now is as good a time as any.” 

He went and opened the door
. A nervous Jasmine walked in and cowardly stood slightly behind Dr. Williams.  She stood there all pretty in her dress, flawless make-up. Her big brown eyes met Blake’s. 

He looked irritated, “I don’t understand Jasmine
, what are you doing here?” 

“Oh
, don’t you get it? She’s your knight in shining armor,” Amber said sarcastically before she could stop herself.” 

Lisa’s eyes got wide, “Jasmine, you?  You’re gonna give Frank a kidney?” 

Jasmine slowly nodded her head and Lisa stared blankly then just absently fell back into the chair that was by Frank’s bedside.  Frank was fit to be tied, but it wasn’t much he could do to express it.  The newly formed red tint to his face and his eyes going to slits was a slight indication of how he felt. 

He managed to get out one word, “No!”

Blake just stood still staring at Jasmine.  On the one hand, relief flooded him because his dad was going to be okay.  On the other hand he was disturbed because he couldn’t understand why Jasmine would do this and why she didn’t tell him.  She had known about this for two weeks.  He didn’t seem mad, but he also didn’t seem friendly.

H
e said, “I need to talk to you now!” 

He walked out of Amber’s embrace and grabbed Jasmine
by the arm, pulled her out the door then closed it behind him.  He just stared at her, not saying anything. It made her squirm. 

“Blake
, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.  There were several reasons why but none of them mattered because I had to make sure I would be a match.  Although I did know it was a strong possibility.” 

Arms folded across his chest, he
asked, “Why?” 

Tears began to form but they didn’t fall
, “Because I can’t stand to see you in pain and if there is anything I can do to fix it then that’s what I’m gonna do.” 

Her plea sliced through him and his resistance melted.

He
went to her, “Jasmine, I know you love me, but this is too much.  We can’t just stand here and pretend he’s ever done anything worthy of that kinda sacrifice from you.” 

She had to tell him.
She didn’t know how he would react to it. 

She
asked, “Can we please sit?” 

They walked over to a couple of chairs against a wall
and sat. 

“I know you have issues with God and church and all of that
, but the truth is Blake I heard it so clearly in my heart the moment I walked through those doors,” she pointed back toward the entrance. 

He looked at her like she had three heads, “You heard what?
” 


I heard the words, take the test for a kidney match.  I was stunned and I said no. I wouldn’t do anything for that man.  Then I felt this pressure on my heart and I knew that was God’s conviction. He wasn’t really asking me.  He was telling me.  Then I had an argument with God giving him all the valid reasons why His plan was flawed.” 

She touched his
face. He was just staring at her like he didn’t know what to say. 

“Then I saw my favorite face in the whole world and I saw all the pain in your eyes.  Blake you held me so tight and you cried.  Do you realize I hadn’t seen you cry since we were
kids?” 

“But Jasmine.” 

“Shhh.  No, just listen.  My love for you made it easy to agree.  Then when I went in that room and he was so nasty and hateful my reasons turned very dark.  I wanted him to suffer knowing that a black woman saved his life.  I wanted him to be reminded every time he saw my face that I was the reason, the only reason, he was breathing.  I was tired of him making me feel like nothing.” 

She looked away from him because she needed a moment.  Blake never knew all the resentment she had for his father
. She was always so respectful and tolerant of him. 

H
is heart ached for her, “Jaz, why didn’t you tell me?” 

She smiled a watery smile and continued with no response
to his question.


The truth is, that just made me more miserable.  I tried to pray about it, but I was pissed at God for putting me in that position in the first place.  I was disappointed in myself because I felt I was no better than your father.  I couldn’t talk to God, so I let Him talk to me.” 

“What do you mean?” 

She laughed, “I picked up my Bible and I let it fall open. I needed something to get me back on solid ground.  It fell open to 1 Corinthians 13.” 

He remembered that one from Sunday school
, “That’s the chapter about love?” 

“Yeah
, it is.  It’s God’s standard for love. I began to read it and I realized the way God wants us to love each other is the way he loves us.  I remembered how you protected me from your dad when we were kids.  You were willing to take the pain for me.  I was reminded of the sacrifice you made for me and the compassion you showed me back when I got pregnant in college.  I remembered how you were by my side holding me up until I could hold myself up.  I remember how every year on my baby’s birthday you held me and comforted me and you never once said I told you so.  I know what that cost you.  I know that it still hurts you.  I know it
still
costs you.  I will never take what you did for me for granted.” 

She saw the emotion storm into his eyes
as he looked away for a moment. 

“You made a choice to love me and support me even when you didn’t agree or didn’t understand how I could do it.  Blake
, I don’t understand why you would still want a relationship with your dad and I don’t agree that he deserves the chance to be in your life after everything he has done to you.  But none of that matters. Love doesn’t always make sense.  I know you love him in spite of who he’s been and I love you.  If you need a relationship with him then I want you to have it.” 

She held his face in her hands, “Blake
, I need to do this and you need to let me.  I don’t know what God is up to but I promise you something good will come from this. I have complete faith and trust.” 

“How can you be so confident
in a God you’ve never seen?” 

“Because I know
in my heart without a doubt that God is real and if this is the path He is leading me down then it’s up to Him to work it out.” 

He grabbed her and hugged her so tight she thought she would break. 

“I love you Jasmine.  I love you so much. Thank you.  Thank you.”

Amber came out and saw them.  Her
eyes locked with Jasmine’s tear-filled ones. Jasmine thought if looks could kill she would flat-line on the spot.  She eased Blake back and wiped her face.

“We should probably go in now and get this fight with your dad over with.” 

He smiled. She envied how men could hold their tears in check and women never seemed to be able to, or at least she couldn’t. 

He turned and saw Amber
.  She was tight lipped.

“Hey baby,” he said
oblivious to her anger as he walked up to her and hugged her. 

“My dad’s going to be okay.” 

She hugged him back not trusting herself to speak. Jasmine’s scent was all over him.  He reached to open the door.  She found her voice.

“You should go talk to your dad
.  He isn’t as happy as you two seem to be.” 

“It’s expected,
” Blake replied.

“Could you give Jasmine and
me just a minute or two,” Amber asked. 

He kissed her on the lips
and walked in his dad’s room.  Amber closed the door.

Jasmine stood up and braced herself for Amber’s obvious
ensuing confrontation.  She was used to their friendship causing friction for Blake’s women but she was more than willing to calmly discuss this with her.  Amber strode to her with purpose and a mean mug like none she had ever seen. 

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