Christmas With Her Ex (16 page)

But he wanted to explain more eloquently that he was now certain they were meant for each other. If he could just see her one more time he would let her know he’d wait for her.

That he’d fight for her.

To hell with it. He knew he was strong enough, determined enough to take that chance again or even as many times as it took. That risking everything for Kelsie’s love would always be worth it—but he needed to stop rushing her. Let her come to that decision in her own way, in her own time.

Max had pulled some Orient Express Christmas Eve strings at his request and filled his special order so Kelsie would get his Christmas surprise before she left for the airport. There was a slim chance he’d have already missed her by the time he’d arranged his grandmother’s discharge but he could deal with that.

Because once Gran was sorted he doubted he’d have much to do, and he could be on the next plane out to Australia, judging by the way Max had taken charge of Winsome since he’d arrived at the hospital last evening.

If he had missed her then, considering he and Kelsie had waited fifteen years to meet again, he could wait a few days more until he could arrange a flight. But he didn’t want to wait.

Christmas Day and Kelsie woke to a blanket of snow outside the Ritz’s windows. Her first white Christmas.
In a famous and luxurious hotel in a city she’d always wanted to visit. So why was her mood so black?

Ahh
. She put her hand over her eyes. Not that word.

Black.

Connor Black. It was too late now but she should have had that drink last night. Should have taken the chance that Connor was right. She missed him this morning.

Maybe there was still time to catch him before she flew out.

She scrabbled in her bag for the number of the hospital the nurse had given her and she dialled shakily.

The doctor had said Winsome would be able to go home early Christmas morning. But when she phoned the hospital they’d already left. Connor had picked her up already. The only good thing was that Winsome was now much more comfortable on the correct medication. Thank goodness it hadn’t been her heart that was the trouble.

Kelsie wished she could say the same for her own heart. But she too would recover with the right treatment. Namely a flight as far away from London as possible and a whole lot of work, but first she had to get through the morning.

There was a knock at the door and she put the phone down as she glanced at the clock.

It was the arrival of breakfast, and when it was pushed in, it looked like a Christmas feast in miniature. A tiny, holly-decorated painted bowl of muesli, strawberries, honey yoghurt and steaming Earl Grey tea.

Under the silver dome was a tiny nativity scene, complete
with dozing animals, surrounded by curls of bacon and egg and French toast. It looked so cute she had to smile. Albeit a watery one. On the tray was a tiny, exquisitely wrapped box with a card and she smiled again as the waiter backed away.

He seemed to be waiting for her to open the card so she slid her finger under the seal and lifted the stiff folded paper out. She expected it to be from the hotel to go with the little unopened present.

Santa has been. There’s something outside the door. Merry Christmas, Kelsie!

She looked up and as if he’d been waiting for her to read it the waiter stopped at the door.

‘Someone has left you something outside your door, madam. Would you like me to bring it in?’

‘Yes, please.’

It was a tiny carry-on suitcase, in gold, with a ribbon around it. She frowned as she circled it and then lifted it onto the bed to open. Inside lay a gorgeous little Christmas tree, sprinkled with gold and covered in tiny fibreoptic lights.

It looked suspiciously like the one from the Orient Express dining car. She guessed the suitcase was so she could fly it home. Why did that thought make her eyes sting and her throat close?

Was Connor here? Her heart leapt and she looked quickly up at the waiter. ‘And the gentleman?’

The man shook his head mournfully. Obviously he was a romantic. ‘There is no gentleman.’

She crossed to the dresser and plugged the little tree
in and watched it turn as the man left, quietly closing the door behind him. The tree spun and sparkled and shimmered like it had in the dining car where she and Connor had eaten together last night.

Tears stung her eyes but she blinked them away. Surely she’d done the right thing. And it was too late now anyway.

She turned back to the wrapped box on her breakfast tray and slowly unwrapped the stiff paper from the gift. Inside lay the silver charm bracelet from the Orient Express, complete with a tiny porter’s hat like Wolfgang’s, a miniature guard’s whistle, a little train engine and a teddy bear.

There was a note.

‘I think that would be wonderful,’ she whispered to the empty room.

He was so much better at this than she was. She glanced at the phone again. One more try and she at least had the house number that Winsome had given her.

But that phone just rang unanswered too.

Time was running out and the airport waited. Maybe he would follow her to Australia, as he’d said. She could only hope so.

It took Kelsie two hours to get to the airport through the snow and as the cab driver dropped her off the radio
cheerfully informed them that flights had a two-hour delay due to the snow. Too long to wait. Too short to jump back into the cab and search for Connor.

‘What you want to do, lady?’

She thought about the suitcase. ‘Just drop me. I’ll stay here until my flight opens.’

‘You sure?’

‘Yep.’ She saw his shoulders lift and he pulled the car into the drop-off point. She paid him and the rat didn’t get out of the car, just popped the boot so she’d have to lift her huge case out herself. Connor would never do that to her.

‘Merry Christmas,’ she said with her most winning smile, and he had the grace to look away. As she got out she heard his door open and he grumbled his way to the rear of the vehicle and heaved her bag onto the pavement for her.

‘Good luck with getting that on the plane,’ he said. Then he grinned, shook his head and wished her luck before he drove away.

Kelsie encouraged the wheels on her suitcase to ignore the snow, but they weren’t listening so she tipped it on its side and dragged it, and her new little gold suitcase along with it, while the icy wind bit into her cheeks. It wasn’t the only part of her that was cold.

Home would be humid. Christmas week would be sunshine and a hot wind. Sunburnt kids and ice-cream cake. Home would be great. But despite the promise of heat the words were only empty words as the wind continued to bite into her. Deeply. She’d blown it. Been a coward. But Connor had said he would come after her.

Inside the departure hall was chaotic. With the flight delays every available waiting space in the airport seemed to be filled with bodies and luggage.

And suddenly she knew. She didn’t want to go. Didn’t want to leave without seeing Connor one more time and telling him she loved him. He’d said he’d come to Australia but what if he never came? What if something happened to his grandmother and he couldn’t come?

It was her own fault. She’d been a quitter. Waking up to Connor’s gifts Should have been the moment she grasped, not run away from. Should have jumped in a cab to him then and there.

And now it was too late. Her pride and her stupid independence had ruined it for her again. She turned around and dragged her suitcase towards the door but even that was difficult to traverse.

Then Kelsie saw Connor arrive and blinked. Or perhaps it was just someone she thought looked like him because she wanted him so badly.

No. It
was
him and she could feel a smile stretch right across her face. He must have been to her hotel. And the joy that had flooded her made no bones about the truth. She loved him. How could she have been so blind? It was as though for the very first time she could see who he really was. How wrong she’d been. Twice. She didn’t deserve his love but she wanted it. All of it. She dragged her suitcases across the floor.

She should have known that loving Connor wouldn’t take away her independence, it would bring out the best of herself. She’d so looked forward to travelling on the
Orient Express, but it seemed learning to love Connor had been her true journey. If only he’d have her.

And here he was so it looked like he would have her. The man was tenacious. Even now he was giving her another chance when she’d been so determined to climb on her high horse and fly off into the sunset. Fool. But she was such a lucky fool.

She watched him cross the floor to her left. Striding tall and straight and commanding. Connor, here, opening himself up to the risk of being knocked down again. She shook her head in wonder. He’d already been let down by her so badly once before and she didn’t think she could ever be that brave.

Or maybe she could?

She saw him hesitate, glance around at the sea of faces, and then he straightened and that determined look she remembered from old crossed his face. His eyes began to systematically scan the crowds. Looking for her. She dropped the handles of her bags and stepped forward towards him.

Connor felt a tap on his shoulder. ‘Excuse me. Would you like my seat, sir?’

He spun around and she was smiling at him. Sky-blue eyes. Snub nose. That mouth. Here in the milling crowds, looking up at him like she’d known he would come.

Then she said something amazing. Something he’d waited fifteen years to hear. ‘It’s not a seat I want to give you.’ She stepped into his arms. ‘It’s my heart. If you’ll have it.’

And there was love light shining from her beautiful
eyes. For him. He couldn’t believe it. But he couldn’t mistake it. She was lifting her face to his, waiting for his kiss. ‘Merry Christmas, Connor.’

He gently touched his lips to hers. ‘Merry Christmas, my love.’ And he lifted her off the floor and spun her in his arms. ‘I love you, you know. Always have. Always will.’

‘I’m sorry, Connor. It was me who had the issues. I was scared of falling in love. Scared of losing my independence when I’d only just seen the possibilities. I put that on you. You never deserved it and I’m sorry.’

So many things made sense now. Even, perhaps, the man he was now. The way he’d organised everything when they had been younger. How he’d tried to think of everything. Kept her safe because he couldn’t bear to lose her.

Connor looked down at her. Wonder and joy were bubbling inside him. ‘We were both young. And I did organise you a lot. And when that blew up in my face I thought I could control my emotions and it wouldn’t happen again. Until I saw you again and you had me back on the ropes.’

‘You are the bravest man I know to take me on.’

He grinned. ‘Not as brave as Max. For taking on Gran.’

She had to laugh at that. Then had a thought. ‘You don’t live with your gran, do you?’

‘No. No way. I love her dearly but we’d kill each other.’ He smiled. ‘I have a flat near Tower Bridge. Scared, were you?’

‘No. Just wondering if we had to live in England all
year round. The weather is very different from what I’m used to.’

‘I’m sure I can think of ways to keep you warm. And Max and my grandmother will sort out their own lives.’ He smiled at her. ‘And
together—’
he stressed the word ‘—we’ll decide the rest.’

She liked the sound of that. A lot. She remembered her presents and the little Christmas tree. Leaned up and kissed him. He tasted wonderful so she did it again.

He tilted his head. ‘Hmm. What was that for? Not that I’m complaining.’

She lifted the sleeve of her coat and jiggled her wrist at him. The little Orient Express bracelet tinkled and caught the light. ‘My gifts. They’re beautiful. Thank you.’ She looked at this tall and commanding man who had fought so hard for her. Had cared so much. ‘I’ve only got me to offer you.’

‘You are all I ever wanted for Christmas.’ He leaned in and their lips met and Kelsie softened and sighed into this gorgeous man she was not going to waste another minute not loving.

‘Merry Christmas, my love.’

He squeezed her in his arms and she felt surrounded by his love. It felt so right. He whispered in her hair, ‘Welcome home.’

I
T WAS CHRISTMAS
night one year later and Connor gently wiped the bead of sweat off Kelsie’s brow as she breathed out slowly and surely.

No strenuous grunting or breath-holding, just slow breath after slow breath in the right direction, and already he could see that soon their longed-for child would arrive. He glanced at the clock. Five minutes to twelve. He smiled to himself. Kelsie had said she’d thought their baby would wait until it could have a birthday of its own and it looked like she had been right. It was obviously an independent little munchkin like its mother.

‘I love you so much,’ he whispered, and Kelsie’s semi-focused gaze settled briefly and softly on his face before she closed her eyes again.

‘Me, too,’ she whispered back. There was no strain in her voice, just calm knowledge that all would happen as it should.

He’d watched her work with his nervous mothers over the last six months since they’d returned from Australia. They’d waited until all her women had birthed and then she’d been as eager as him to come back to live in England to spend time with Winsome and her new
husband, Max, and prepare their own home overlooking the Thames for their new baby’s arrival.

He’d eased back from his research and spent more time working together with Kelsie in his fertility clinic, here at Saint Douglas’s, meeting the gap for clients who had been successful in conception but were terrified about their pregnancies and labours, and his new mothers had blossomed.

The beautiful births he’d been privileged to watch over had taken on a serene quality he’d never seen before, and the other midwives were absorbing what Kelsie had to teach them. It was like the two of them had been destined to heal childless couples—just as they had been destined to heal each other—and the joy that brought made each day a blessing.

But this was his and Kelsie’s birth, their own magic, and the wonder of the moment was upon them. He squeezed his wife’s hand, glanced at the clock and smiled again as his daughter arrived gently into the world.

One minute after midnight, and baby Winsome Kelsie Black opened her eyes and blinked up at her father, her mother and the brand-new world. Accidentally her little arm lifted and she waved.

Kelsie laughed. Caught his eye and blew him a kiss. Whispered, ‘I love you.’

And he whispered back, ‘I love you, too.’ He looked down at his family. His gorgeous wife, his gorgeous daughter, and the way his arm lay across them both.

He’d buy his daughter a present. And he knew the perfect thing. A train!