Chasing Dragonflies (21 page)

“Shit, baby, we have to think about what we are going to do.”

“We?” she waved her hands in the air. “How is this a we thing?”

“Sweetheart,” he said grabbing her forearm.

“Don't fucking sweetheart me Dex.” She wrenched her arm out of his grip. “Where have you even been? I've been trying to call you all week, now you show up on my doorstep wanting to make decisions about my life.”

She spun away from him and moved across the room, suddenly needing space. She felt a hand on her arm and turned to see Patrick had hold of her. His eyes were sad, he looked heart-broken. She knew he thought they might have a chance, she felt guilt wash over her. Her dad came crashing into her thoughts. He would have been mortified.

Sitting on the couch, she pulled her legs to herself and wrapped her arms around them, in a protective manner.

“I just want to live my life,” she started pleading, not really to anyone, mostly thinking out loud. Tears stung behind her eyes, she had not cried for her parents, she had not cried for anything for years. Now she was overcome with emotion.

Both men stood nearby, staring at her. Staring at each other. Neither knowing what to do. Dex moved toward her, kneeling in front of her, putting his hands on her arms.

“Baby? Sweetheart?”

She heard him talking to her, pleading with her, but she was lost in her own thoughts, trying to keep the tears at bay.

“I wanted to go sky-diving and travelling and everything. I wanted to do everything. How can I do everything? I can't do this. I can't. I can't. It's not the way it’s meant to be... fuck!” She knew she was rambling, but she couldn't help it, her world was crumbling down around her ears. Wasn't having a baby meant to be a happy time?

“Maddie...Maddie look at me,” Dex demanded.

She lifted her head. Dex looked hazy through her watery tear filled eyes. She loved that man. So damned much.

“It's going to be okay. Do you hear me? I am sorry I have not been here all week. I had to get my head around all that stuff we talked about. I am here now okay?”

She nodded her head and there was no more holding back the tears as they tumbled down her cheeks.

“I am not going to leave you to deal with any of this alone, I am here and I love you.” With that he moved up and sat on the couch beside her, pulling her into his arms. She let him. She was terrified of what might come next, but she had Dex.

Dex's shirt was soaked with her tears by the time her crying ebbed. She tried in vain to brush them away.

“Sorry,” she murmured.

“What are you sorry for?”

“For your shirt, for everything.”

“Hey Sweetheart, don't be sorry okay?” His hand slipped under her chin, forcing her to look up at him. “I know this was never part of the plan, but hey guess what?” a huge grin spread across his face. “We're having a baby.” He leant down and placed a tender kiss on her lips. Pulling back he continued. “I love you, you are going to be an awesome mum.”

“Do you really think so?”

“Hell yeah, I saw the way you were with Shyla, any kid would be lucky to have you as their mother. Not only that, you know what?” he stroked her cheek, wiping away the remnants of her tears. “It's going to be our baby. Yours and mine. It's like a second chance for both of us.”

He was happy, through all of this. Having her break down and bawl her eyes out. Her life was a train-wreck. His was not much better, could it be possible that they could pull this together?

“I love you Dex,” she whispered as he pulled her in for a hug.

“I know baby,” he whispered against her hair. “And I know you're scared right now, but it's all going to work out and be okay.”

Dex squeezed her hand as
they watched the young children playing. It was warm in the waiting area of the doctor’s surgery and Maddie's palms were sweaty. Or maybe it was her nerves making her feel that way.

“It'll be alright...I promise.” Dex whispered, leaning into her side.

She loved the way he could always tell when she was anxious. Loved that he was here with her now. Loved him and was just so happy to have him at her side.

Since finding out she was pregnant he had barely left her side.

“You're pretty lady.” Came a tiny little voice. She looked around and saw a small child about four year’s old standing beside her, a huge smile on her face.

“Well thank you sweetie...I think you are pretty too,” she replied to the sweet little girl with the piggy tales and a smear of chocolate on her chin.

“My mummy is going to have a baby. I want a baby sister, but daddy wants a baby brother. Are you having a baby too lady?”

She put her hand to be flat belly.

“Emelia, come. Leave that poor lady alone.” Called the child's mother from across the room.

Maddie looked up and smiled at the woman. Thinking of herself in that situation.

Emilia wiggled her fingers. “Bye lady. I hope your baby is a sister,” she called as she darted across the room back to her mum.

“What a cutie,” she giggled, looking to Dex, seeing a smile on his face too. Knowing he was thinking of his own little girl. She wondered what Shyla would think of having a brother or sister.

“Maddison Arnold.” A deep male voice called. Causing her to dart her head up. An older man, dressed in a suit and tie stood at an open door, with a clipboard in his hand.

Dex rose to his feet first, pulling her with him to a standing position, before striding toward the open room.

Taking a seat, the man introduced himself as Doctor Sinclair. He explained he would take care of her throughout her pregnancy. He knew of her story and had sent for her files to be sent over from the hospital.

“Now do we want to have a look at this new addition?” The doctor asked, rising to his feet.

Confused, she looked to Dex for reassurance. He had been through this whole process before. It was all knew to her. Judging by the beaming smile on his face, she figured it must be a good thing. She rose to her feet and followed the doctor over to the couch, which he reached out and patted with his hand.

Tentatively she turned and sat down on the paper-covered couch. Whilst the doctor turned his back and tapped at a laptop.

When he turned back around he had an odd looking wand in one hand and bottle of lotion in the other.

“Now don't be scared,” he reassured her. “Lay back on the bed, we are just going to bring a picture up here on the screen and see if we can get some measurements of your baby.”

She looked to Dex and he nodded. Laying down on the cold hard bed, Dex lovingly adjusted the pillow behind her head, to make sure she was comfortable.

“Now I am just going to squirt some of this goo onto your tummy, it will be a little cold okay?”

The doctor warned, before lifting her shirt and tugging her jeans lower on her hips. The lotion he called 'goo' was cold and clammy. When it hit her warm skin it gave her a little shiver. Then using the wand in his hand he was suddenly pressing into belly, hard. Making her feel like she might pee her pants.

“Ah, there it is, can you see that?” he asked, turning the computer screen so she and Dex could get a clearer view.

She was not sure what she was supposed to see, it was all greys and blacks. One small spot appeared to be flashing. The doctor continued tapping away at the computer, drawing lines within the picture displayed on the screen.

“What is the little thing that keeps flashing?” she asked the doctor when he turned back to her.

“That,” he said pointing to the spot in question on the screen. “That is your little baby’s heart beating away there. It is measuring eight to nine weeks and things look to be right on target.”

Her baby’s heartbeat. She looked up at Dex, who was smiling down at her and her own heart skipped a beat. There inside her body was a tiny little heartbeat of a tiny little baby that they had created together. They were making their own little family.

Suddenly, all those things she thought she was missing out on, didn't matter anymore. She had something that mattered more than climbing the Sydney Harbour Bridge and it had it's only little heartbeat, beating away inside of her body.

***

On their way home from the doctor’s surgery, she could barely wipe the smile from her face. Dex reached across the seat and rubbed his hand gently along her leg, never taking his eyes off the road.

“It's good to see you happy.”

“We're having a baby,” she chirped. Overwhelmed with excitement at having seen her little baby’s heartbeat.

“I know...pretty cool huh?”

“What do you think Shyla will think?”

“I think she will love it. Actually...I know now is not the right time to bring it up, but about Shyla.” His face turned from happy to serious.

“What? What's happened?” A sudden pang of urgency struck her. His serious look had her concerned.

“Nothing's happened. I ahh...I spoke to Melody, that's all. I told her if she does not start letting me see Shyla regularly, I am going to see a lawyer.”

Relief washed over her, there was nothing wrong and Dex was finally making a stand against the woman who was raising his child.

“Oh Dex, how did that go?”

“She got shitty, as expected. Then I reminded her she was living in my house and I was paying all hers and Shyla's bills.”

“Really?”

“Yeah really. After Issy died, I didn't really want to go back to the house anyway. I've kept up the mortgage repayments on it. At least my daughter was being provided for. Plus I give her money for everything Shy needs.”

“Dex!”

“I'm not going to take it away from her and I told her that. I also have no intentions of ripping Shyla away from the only home and mother she has ever had. But I want to start spending more time with my daughter and if she doesn't do the right thing, I will go see a lawyer and see what my options are.”

He didn't look at her as he spoke, but she sat watching him closely. It was difficult to comprehend this was the same man she watched melt down only a couple of weeks previously. In such a short amount of time both their lives had been turned upside down and she couldn't be happier.

“What are you looking at me like that for?” He asked finally turning to her.

“Oh nothing, I'm just thinking that I love you.”

“
Here, it needs some more
chocolate balls on the side,” she said poking the lollies into the frosting.

“You're going to make the kid sick, with all that sugar.” Patrick laughed.

He had baked a cake for Shyla's birthday and she was helping him decorate it with lots of lollies. Shyla couldn't see it, but Maddie wanted to make sure she could feel it, so it was going to be bumpy.

Polly was coming. As were Asha and Xavier. Xavier was in charge of the barbecue. Dex was going to pick up Charlie and Shyla. Her actual birthday was not for a few days, but Sunday was the best day to get everyone there.

Patrick even had a lady friend coming along, someone he had met at Aunty Polly's. Maddie was a bit dubious about that, but he seemed happy, so that was the important thing.

“So where's the party at?” she heard Xavier's voice ringing out from the front door.

“We're in here Xave,” she called out to her brother, who came in and wrapped his arms around her in a huge hug.

“Oh look, it's my favourite fly,” he joked, poking a finger in her ear.

Giggling, she pushed him away. She had not told him yet she was pregnant, she hoped he would take it well. He had softened towards Dex, once he realised he was not such a bad guy. Patrick was taking a little longer. But thankfully it seemed he was finally moving on with his life.

It was not long before everyone was there, the backyard was a hive of activity. Xavier was busy cooking sausages on the barbecue. Polly and Charlie were deep in conversation. Patrick's new friend, Ginger was sitting in his lap, playing with his dreadlocks. Shyla was sitting on Dex's lap, rabbiting on about her friends. Maddie was feeling amazing, apart from the smell of the sausages that was turning her stomach a little.

After a fabulous lunch, Xavier stood and cleared his throat all very officially. Asha's cheeks were turning red, something was going on.

“I have an announcement to make,” he beamed, looking around at their small gathering. “Asha and I are getting married. I asked her last night.”

Jumping to her feet, she threw her arms around her brother’s neck, whispering a congratulations into his ear. She was truly happy for him. Next she hugged Asha, wishing her well also. Taking her seat she clutched her stomach as a wave of nausea washed over her again. Asha shot her a concerned look. This whole pregnancy thing sucked. She had read the nausea would subside around twelve weeks. So only a couple more weeks to go, she hoped they were right.

Dex quickly came to sit beside her, draping an arm around her back.

“Are you okay Sweetheart?”

“Yeah, just a bit of nausea, it will pass in a minute or two.”

Looking up, Xavier was staring hard at her, she had not told him yet and Patrick and Asha were both sworn to secrecy.

“Are you okay Fly?” he asked catching her eye.

“Yeah, yeah I'm okay...”

“What's going on?” he asked looking from her to Dex.

Dex looked to her for reassurance. She nodded slightly. She guessed now was as good a time as any for everyone to know.

“We have some news too...” he said, wringing his hands, obviously nervous as to everyone’s reaction. “Maddie and I are having a baby.”

“Oh my goodness,” came a delighted shout from Aunty Polly as she flew at Maddie and pulled her into her arms. Charlie was not far behind. He hugged about as well as Aunty Polly did. Even Ginger, who she had just met gave her a hug.

Finally Xavier approached her. “Far out Fly, I never saw that coming...” she searched his face, she could not read his emotion.

“Are you okay with it?”

His face finally broke into a big Xavier smile. “I'm going to be an uncle?”

“Yes...yes you are.”

“I love you Madd,” he said throwing his arms around her.

She pulled away quickly as her stomach rolled, quickly bringing her hand to her mouth