Captive at Christmas (9 page)

“I just want you, Mac. Right here, right now, only you. Make me forget about everything except for you. For the next seven days, be mine and I will be yours.”

The need to bury himself deep inside of her was too great. “I wish I could resist you, Hannah. I want you too much but I don’t want to hurt you.”

“I mean what I said. Even the pieces of yourself that you’re afraid to show me. I won’t break, Mac.” She weaved her hands to the back of his neck and moved her hips until the warm, slick heat between her thighs pressed against his painfully rigid arousal.

Though he longed to plunge into the depths of her core, Mac knew he was much larger than most men. Hannah deserved something better than a few rough thrusts, even if she said she would take him however he wanted her. He kissed her hard before sliding down her body. Mac planted a few open mouthed kisses along her collarbone, slowly making his way to the valley between her breasts.

Soft little pants escaped from her lips and her hands gripped the sheets, trembling, as if she didn’t fully comprehend what was going to happen next. It merely stoked the flames of lust burning inside him and pushed thoughts of his own release to the back of his mind. Right now, all Mac could think about was pleasing Hannah.

As he flicked his tongue over the hardened bud atop her left breast, she arched her back and gasped. Mac grinned before nipping at the sensitive flesh with his teeth. The moans that fled from her throat told him she enjoyed his ministrations, even the rougher touches. He soothed the flesh with a long, languid swipe of his tongue and then nibbled again. She cried out his name, thrusting her hips against his chest and a gush of moisture surged over his skin.

Thrilled with the knowledge that he could make her feel so good, Mackenzie gave her other breast an equal amount of attention. Her reaction sent him spiralling over the edge. The lines between lust and emotions blended until he couldn’t distinguish between the two. When she cried out a second time, he reached down to the juncture between her thighs, located the firm nub of sensitive flesh and pinched it gently, rolling it between his fingers to prolong her release.

“Oh God, Mac!”

“Hannah,” he murmured, nudging her thighs apart with his shoulders.

“W-what are you d-doing?”

He glanced at her face over the pale contours of her body and chuckled. “What does it look like?” Hannah stared at him through heavy-lidded eyes and with trembling lips. Had she never experienced a satisfying release before now? Had no man attempted what he was about to? The thought made him curse silently and make a soundless promise to show her what she’d been missing. “Just relax, sweetheart.”

When her head rested on the pillows, he slid his hands under her backside, lifting her closer to his mouth. His breath hardly reached her when Hannah moaned, prompting a long and firm stoke of his tongue over that most sensitive bud. Her sweet and tangy scent enveloped him, tasting better than he could have imagined. She shuddered beneath him and he knew she was losing all sense of time and space.

For the second time that day, Hannah began to experience a tumult of liquid fire building up in her lower abdomen. Now that she knew what it meant, what it felt like, she desperately wanted the sensation again. She wanted all of it, everything that Mackenzie could give, even if he would never truly belong to her.

Heated ribbons swelled and rippled down to her toes. Hannah trembled, splintering beneath his talented mouth. Just as she came undone, gasping with his name on her lips, Mac thrust one thick, warm finger deep inside her and pressed against the bundle of nerves. The shock of it, mingled with the last remnants of tremors pushed her over the edge once more.

While Hannah was distracted by the sensations in her body, Mac chose that moment to surge deep into her tight, slick heat and forced back a barrier. He knew, to the exact second, when he took from her what no man had taken before. She stiffened beneath him, fingers curled into her palms while the strangled and pained cry escaped her lips.

Fuck, fuck, fuck!

It shouldn’t have been him. He cursed inwardly, wanting to pull out and cradle her to his chest, though it would be just as painful for her if he did.

“Dammit, Hannah!” his whispered growl touched her ear. “Why didn’t you tell me? I would have–”

“No, Mac. You wouldn’t have,” she countered, tears dripping from the corners of her eyes.

True. If he knew that she’d never been with a man before, he certainly wouldn’t have been the first. Now that it was done though, he felt the need to know. “Why me, Hannah? Why not someone who could be gentle with you? Someone…”
deserving
, he wanted to say.

“I want you, and only you, Mac. Just make me feel like I belong to you, even if it’s only pretend.” Lifting her head, she found his lips again, demanding that he follow through with what he started.

Another realization slammed into his chest with so much force, it nearly knocked him off the bed. “Hannah, shit. You’re not on the pill, are you?”

She shook her head. “But I …” her lips trembled. “I can’t have…I-I was sick… When I was younger,” Hannah sobbed. “I can’t…”

Too much had been taken away from her and he was not going to make her say the words, to admit something that most men would call a relationship deal-breaker. He silenced her with a soul-scorching kiss and drove all thoughts from her mind with long, deliberately slow thrusts.

After a short time, she began to meet him, finding a rhythm as her hips rose up to meet with his.

“Faster,” she panted, tearing away from his mouth to cover the scars on his shoulder with delicate kisses.

He chuckled, burying his face into the softness of her neck and inhaled the deliciously feminine scent that only she possessed. “Not yet.”

“Mac …” Frantically, she clutched his rear with shaking hands and attempted to quicken his movements. “More…I…I need more!”

Again, he laughed quietly, this time into her hair. He ignored that voice in the back of his mind, telling him to take her harder, faster.

Rougher.

To make her scream his name, die that small death in his arms again and again.

Cause her slight frame to shudder beneath him, taut and writhing in glorious and agonizing ecstasy.

“Not yet, Hannah. I want you to feel it building,” he whispered, dragging his teeth along the pulse point on her throat. “To remember every sensation.” Pulling out to the tip, he slowly – almost painfully so – plunged back into her. “Oh, Hannah…”

She sobbed, trembled, and gasped for air in a futile attempt to pull an acceptable breath into her lungs. Hannah lost her mind with each tauntingly exquisite thrust. The pain from entry subsided, replaced with an ache like nothing she could have imagined.

A desperate need filled her when Mac departed her, only to trade places when he buried himself deep within, connecting them in a way she wanted to remember always.

So that she could capture this moment, keep a part of him forever, Hannah forced her eyes to open. The icy-grey stare that met her was not cold and heartless.

This time, she saw a storm of emotions churning into an indiscernible gaze. Her heart wanted to surround him, capture this man inside of it and keep him safe and feeling loved.

Inexperience had her wanting to race towards their ultimate goal, but as many times as she tried, Mac denied her with his rough, sexy laugh and continued setting of the pace.

He held her gaze, drawing her up to the edge of the universe and all around her, Hannah witness the birth and death of galaxies, suns and planets. Swirling in colours she had never before witnessed.

Hot, white heat enveloped her, scorching her flesh without any sign of reprieve. Mac pushed her further into the abyss, teasing and tormenting her with clever fingers. His touch branded her while their hips met, clashing and colliding until he finally gave her what she’d been frantic for since the first moment he entered her.

Seconds before she shattered beneath him, her soul expelling itself to the stars above, he clutched her to him and trembled with her name on his lips. In that instant, Hannah knew that she would never love anyone as much as she loved Mackenzie.

“What are you doing, Hannah?”

Taking absolutely no notice of his growls, Hannah continued to run her fingers over every part of his bared torso. Mac hid himself under layers of clothing not because he was cold, but because of the collection of scars that crisscrossed over his flesh.

Most appeared to be superficial, however there were a large number of scars that looked as though they had been unbelievably painful when they were formed.

“Hannah,” he winced as she smoothed her hand along a nine inch long purple mark on his back.

“Is it still sore?” She placed feather-light grazes of her lips on the skin around his wound until he eventually stopped flinching.

Mac let out a ragged sigh and moved onto his back, pulling her down with him. “It’s just…recent. Too recent,” he confessed. “And yeah, a little. Gettin’ better though.”

The devastatingly crushing truth of his past was carved out over his body. Only a handful of times had she seen anything even close to this and of all those people put together, it didn’t look as horrific. Her entire being ached and she silently forgave his cruel actions towards her during their time together.

As if to take the focus off of himself, Mac asked, “How are
you
feeling? Are you in any pain?”

“I’m fine,” she whispered against the firmness of his stomach. “Just a little tender.”

The momentary sting she felt was nothing compared to what he had endured.

Torture.

Just the word brought images to her mind that she would rather not see.

Knowing that he had experienced such agony forced another rush of tears to surface.

“And what about earlier?”

Groaning, she replied, “Actually, I managed to successfully push it from my mind until you mentioned it.”

“I’m sorry, Hannah.” Mac sighed, gently massaging her scalp. Neither of them wanted to remember the events that occurred that day. “You know what sounds like a little slice of heaven right now?”

She looked up the length of his abdomen and into his eyes. “What?”

The left-hand corner of his mouth drew back, lower lip slipped between his teeth. “That whirlpool tub. Think you’re up for it?”

His smile felt like a gift and she gazed at him, saving this moment to the hard-drive of her brain. “I don’t think I can move, to be honest.” Proving a point, Hannah tried to push herself up on shaking arms. Wrists and elbows buckled, and she collapsed into his arms. “See?”

A deep, hearty laugh erupted from his chest. “I suppose I’ll have to carry you then, huh?”

“Mac, when our time here is up, it’s really going to be up, isn’t it?” The question escaped her before she could stop it.

“Hannah …”

At least she had her answer. Hannah rested her head against his heart, wanting to remember how he felt, sounded and smelled, storing those memories away for later. She moved her fingers through the light smattering of dark hair over his chest and breathed deeply to keep her emotions in check.

“Hannah, even if it was possible…I told you, I can’t.”

She nodded, touching her lips to his firm, tanned skin. Mac closed himself off – emotionally and only God knew what other ways – as a form of self-preservation. It broke her heart that he thought himself unworthy of friendship and love, but she couldn’t force it on him.

All she could do was exactly what she had been doing. Give him her love without attaching any strings. Even if, by the end of the seven days left, he still wanted to walk away, at least she would have shown him that he did deserve happiness.

“Then, for the remainder of our stay here, let me love you, Mac.” She touched his chest, resting her hand above his heart. “Don’t hold yourself back from me during our time together, okay? Let me in.”

“Hannah.” When he paused, she looked up, almost afraid of what she might find in his expression. What she saw filled her with hope. “You’re already in.” Mac closed his fingers around her hand and pressed her palm to his lips. “Let me go fill that tub and get us something to drink. I’ll be right back.” He kissed the tip of her nose and she giggled.