Broken Wings (The Broken Series Book 3) (10 page)

“What
about me?” Kadyn asked angrily.

“Rafael
waited five months for you to take me back. You said we couldn’t go back to the
way things were. You said you’d be my friend, but that was as far as you were
willing to go.” I shook my head again. “Michael doesn’t want me and neither do
you, Kadyn. Rafael does. He was there for me when I lost the baby. He’s the one
who picked me up off the floor and brought me back to my family. He was a good
friend through some really difficult times. So why shouldn’t I date him?”

“Why?”
Kadyn asked incredulously. “Why?” he shouted. His voice was dripping with sarcasm.
“Let’s start with the obvious. First, he’s Michael’s brother. You don’t get
engaged to a guy, then date his brother. Ever. Second, I don’t trust him. He’ll
manipulate and deceive you the same way his brother did. Third, you’re still in
love with Michael… and fourth… fourth… fourth is me! Rafael isn’t the only one
who’s picked you up off the floor, Kri. I have been through hell and back for
you, twice.”

I
backed away as Kadyn drew closer. My cell phone chimed with an incoming message.
My eyes flitted to the counter.

Kadyn
leaned into my face. “And what’s this crap about I don’t want you?
I don’t
want you?
Do I look like I don’t want you?”

My
heart stalled as Kadyn boxed me in against the wall. “I… no… but…”

His
lips crashed against mine as he pinned me to the wall. “Does that feel like a
man who doesn’t want you?” He didn’t bother waiting for a response. His lips
captured mine in a kiss that was brutal and raw.

I
tried to push him away, but he wouldn’t budge. I sobbed into his mouth.

He
pulled back. “What the hell do you think is going on here, Kri? I’ve been
waiting for you to get over Michael. I’ve been trying to help you heal. I told
you I loved you but I couldn’t be with you when you were still in love with
another man. I never told you I didn’t love you. I never said I didn’t want
you.
Shit!
” Kadyn pushed away from me as my cell phone chimed again.

He
glared at me from across the room. “I’m out of here. You want to screw up your
life again, you go right ahead. Rafael is nothing more than the rebound guy. If
he’s as decent as you claim he is, then you’re only going to end up hurting him
too.” Kadyn scooped up his movies and stormed out of the house.

Tears
streamed down my face as I slid down the wall. My phone chimed again. I crawled
over to the counter, reached up for my phone, and sank against the cupboards.
There were three missed messages from Rafael. I swiped at my eyes so I could read
through the messages.

Are
you okay?

The
security guys heard yelling. Text me to let me know you’re okay.

If
you don’t text me, I’m sending them in.

I
quickly typed out a response.
I’m okay. Please don’t send them in
.

He
responded immediately.
They just saw Kadyn leave.
What happened?

I
reached for the counter and pulled myself to my feet. I leaned against the
counter as I typed my response.
Kadyn got upset when I told him I’m dating
you.
I pushed away from the counter and began turning off the lights. I
couldn’t believe Kadyn still loved me. How could he want a relationship with me
after everything I’d done?

The
phone rang as I turned to go upstairs. I glanced at the Caller ID. “Rafael,” I mumbled
wearily. My voice cracked as I answered the phone. “Hi.”

“I’m
sorry, baby. I know his friendship means a lot to you. Do you want me to come
over?”

I
collapsed onto my bed. “No, Rafael. This doesn’t trump guarding the prince. I’m
upset and a little confused, but I’ll be okay. What are you doing?”

“I’m
walking the perimeter of the hotel. The prince has retired to his room.”

I
closed my eyes. “When do you get to sleep?”

“I’m
not going to sleep.”

My
eyes popped open. “Really? You aren’t going to sleep… for three days?”

He
chuckled softly. “I’ll catch a cat nap in front of his hotel room if other
members of his security detail are still awake.”

I
slid out of bed to dig some pajamas out of the drawer. “That’s got to be brutal.”

“I’ll
catch up on sleep this weekend. How did your interview go this morning?”

I
tried to juggle the phone as I eased out of my clothes. “They offered me the
job.”

Rafael
chuckled. “I’m not surprised. Let’s get together Saturday afternoon. I can
start teaching you Russian and show you some self-defense moves.”

I
briefly moved the phone from my ear as I slipped a silk camisole over my head. “Are
you sure? Maybe you should just spend the day sleeping.”

“The
prince’s flight departs early Saturday morning. I’ll come home and sleep as
soon as his plane takes off. Why don’t you plan to come over around four
o’clock? We’ll work out for a little bit and grab some dinner afterwards.”

I
yawned as I padded off to the bathroom. “Okay. That sounds good.”

Rafael
yawned on the other end of the phone. “Try to get some sleep, Kri. It’s after
two a.m.”

I
caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and winced at how wrecked I looked. “I
will.”

“Dream
of me.”

I
laughed. “I’ll try. I’ll see you Saturday.”

“Good-night,
my love.”

I
smiled. “Good-night, Rafael.”

I
washed my face and brushed my teeth before crawling back into bed. I had a sinking
feeling that I’d caused irreparable damage to my relationship with Kadyn. I wondered
if he’d ever speak to me again… if he’d refuse to even be friends. If only I’d
known Kadyn’s feelings before Rafael asked me to give him a chance.

I
sighed miserably. Back pedaling was pointless. I’d already agreed to date
Rafael, and Kadyn was thoroughly disgusted with me. I picked up my cell phone
and typed a quick message to Kadyn.
I’m so sorry. I didn’t know. I honestly
believed you only wanted to be friends. I never stopped loving you, Kadyn. I wouldn’t
have agreed to date Rafael if I had known you felt the same way. I hope you can
forgive me in time.

I
tossed the phone onto my nightstand and pulled the pillow over my head. Every
time I came close to pulling my life back together, something would blow it all
apart. In the past, I’d been able to point the finger at someone else… Tom,
Justin, Michael, Emerico Alentisca. Now, the only person I could blame was me.

The
last two days were a blur, like someone had run his thumb over my life and
smudged all the minutes together. Kadyn hadn’t responded to my text. I was
convinced he wanted nothing more to do with me. The thought of never seeing him
again had left me feeling completely wrecked.

I
beat myself up a million times over my decision to date Rafael. Still, I
couldn’t deny that I wanted to date him, and I really enjoyed spending time
with him. It was obvious he cared about me, and I cared about him too. But what
Kadyn and I had was special. I loved him deeply, and there were so many facets
to that love, I couldn’t even name them all. The thought of never seeing him
again had left me in excruciating pain when I was kidnapped, and here I was
again… wallowing in pain because I might never see him again.

I
gazed out over the Potomac River from a rather shaky standing bow pose on my
yoga mat. I was trying to loosen my muscles before I went over to Rafael’s
house to lift some weights. It felt weird going over there when he wasn’t home,
but he had called a number of times encouraging me to go. I took a deep breath
and blew it out as I finished working through my final pose. Then I rolled up
the mat, grabbed my keys and bottled water, and walked over to Rafael’s house.

I
eyed his furniture and artwork as I made my way to the gym. Everything was so
masculine, mysterious, and a bit dark… but it fit Rafael. I stopped abruptly in
front of a picture that hung in the upstairs hallway between his bedroom and
the gym.
How had I not seen this before?

The
photographer had captured a woman sitting on a park bench. A young black man
was holding her hand. He gazed up at her tear stained face while on bended knee.

The
floor tilted. I backed away from the photograph until I hit the rail
overlooking the stairs. The woman in the photograph was me… and I would never
forget the stranger who sang to me in that park.

I
dropped my yoga mat and slid down the dark wood railing until I was sitting on
the floor. Michael had sent Rafael to watch over me when I first moved to DC. Had
Rafael seen how sad I was? Had he asked that man to sing to me? My heart beat frantically
as I sat there staring at the picture
. Just how long has Rafael been in my
life?

I
went through the motions with the free weights. I thought about hitting one of
the punching bags, but I couldn’t find any gloves that fit me. I was reeling from
the photograph and still trying to sort through what it meant. Why had he taken
the photograph? Was it intended for Michael, or had Rafael taken the picture for
himself? I contemplated texting Rafael but forced myself from the phone. I
wanted to see his response in person.

I
returned to my house so I could shower before school. I only had one two-hour class
scheduled on Fridays. Still, that class seemed insurmountable given everything
that was going on inside my head. Shae had already picked up on my sullen mood.
She had been peppering me with questions between classes yesterday. I’d avoided
the discussion but only because I’d promised I would talk about it after school
tonight.

We
made it through class relatively unscathed… well, as unscathed as you could be when
you were forced to mediate in front of the entire class. I was twenty-nine
years old, and I still felt like I was standing knock-kneed in front of the
junior high cheerleading squad.

I
stopped by the grocery store after class to grab some wine and a couple of
other groceries so I could make dinner for Rafael when he returned. Shae had
agreed to pick up a large Santa Fe ZPizza before coming over to my house.

I
had barely set my keys down when the doorbell rang. “Hey,” I greeted
breathlessly as I swung the front door open.

Shae
smiled. “Do you have any idea how cruel you really are?”

My
jaw dropped. “What? What did I do?”

Shae
huffed out a breath as she joined me in the foyer. “I had to sit in my car and smell
this pizza for six blocks. You’re lucky there’s anything left.”

I
laughed. “Did you already eat a piece?”

“No,
but I’m not waiting any longer.” She flung the lid to the pizza box open as we entered
the kitchen.

I
reached for the wine opener. “Do you want wine?”

Shae
snorted. “Have we met? Of course I want wine.”

“Are
you okay with a Chianti by Ruffino? It’s really good.”

Shae
grabbed a paper towel as she sank her teeth into the pizza. She climbed onto a
stool at the center island. “Sure.”

I
wrenched the cork out of the bottle and filled two glasses with the scarlet
wine. I handed Shae a glass before raising mine for a toast. “
Budmo
.”

“Bud
what?” Shae asked with her glass hanging in mid-air.

“
Budmo
.
That’s the traditional wine toast in Ukraine. It’s a toast to your health.”

Shae
looked skeptical, but she tapped her glass against mine. “Well, then.
Budmo
.”

I
took a sip and laughed. “Honestly. I looked it up while I was waiting in the
checkout lane at the grocery store. I think we should know the proper wine
toast since we’ll be eating out while we’re there. Oh, and just so you know,
you can also say
za vas
, which means ‘here’s to you.’”

Shae
laughed. “Good to know. Now, tell me why you’ve been so down the past few
days.”

I
grabbed a piece of pizza and settled into the stool next to Shae. “Well, I
broke the news to Kadyn that I got the job. He wasn’t very happy about that.
Then I told him that Rafael and I were dating. He got really upset. He said he
still loved me, that he still wanted to be with me, but he was trying to give
me time to heal from everything that happened with Michael. He was furious that
I was dating Rafael. He said Rafael was nothing more than a rebound guy and
that I was essentially screwing up both of our lives. He stormed out of my
house. I texted him to apologize, but he hasn’t texted back. I don’t think he
wants anything to do with me, and I’m worried he may never speak to me again.”
I choked back a mouthful of pizza as tears pooled in my eyes.

Shae
blew out a long breath. “Wow. I can see why you’d be upset, although I can’t
say that I’m terribly surprised. It’s easy to see Kadyn has feelings for you,
and the two of you have been through a lot.”

I
sighed. “I know, but Rafael and I have been through a lot too.”

Shae
reached for another piece of pizza. “What if Kadyn decides to speak to you
again? What if he asks you to stop dating Rafael and date him instead?”