Broken Soldier (Book One) (13 page)

“Oh course, although I must admit that I’m as
concerned about the process as you seem to be.”

They stared at one another, and then Mike asked,
“So, what’s next?”

“When you are ready and have removed your clothing,
I will strap you to the bed. A robot will establish a few entries
into your blood stream to provide a means for the various elements
to be administered. Bambi will administer a preliminary sedative to
ease you into the first part. While you are being treated, you will
receive large doses of nutritional liquids. Your body will need the
additional sustenance, because it will grow as the process goes
forth.”

“How long will I be strapped down?”

“Until you have finished writhing and screaming.
I’ll let Bambi decide when to release you.”

“Damn it, Jo, did you have to put it that way?
Couldn’t you have said that differently?”

“I’m sorry. I just didn’t want you to think I had
lied to you about any of this. In reality, this may not be as bad
as I have made it seem, but I can’t be sure.”

“Wonderful,” he said, as he undressed and lay down
on the bed.

Jo was careful, almost tender, as he strapped Mike’s
arms, torso and legs to the bed. Once restrained, Mike was very
nervous, so he told Jo, “Let’s get his damn thing started. Please
don’t make me wait.”

A robotic arm came out of the wall and the straps
held his arm steady as a nozzle sprayed something cold on the area
where he was to be injected. Then a needle was pushed into his
veins. He hardy felt it. Within seconds he became drowsy

From that moment on, he was in a mental fog. The
lighting changed several times and he wasn’t sure if it was an
illusion, or if it was necessary for the procedure. He had no way
of knowing whether or not the process had begun, or how long he lay
there.

Although he was very groggy, he was certain that he
had been there for several hours, when he began to feel the pain.
It was on his skin at first, but then he felt it deep in his
stomach. It went from an ache to a mild throb and finally to sharp
agonizing pain, as though someone had stabbed him in the gut with a
knife.

He screamed and begged for relief. He was vaguely
aware of Jo’s presence, and his firm steady voice became a source
of comfort for Mike to focus on. Fortunately, he passed out several
times, which gave him an opportunity to miss out on some of the
fun.

At one point, he remembered Jo telling him, “We have
to make a few changes, but it’s going well, Mike. Bambi tells me
she knows exactly what to do. You’re going to be fine.”

Jo’s tone lacked believability, or so he thought.
But at this point, there was nothing he could do but groan and
scream. It seemed to go on forever. Somewhere during his upgrade,
Jo released his bonds and he jumped up and ran around, banging into
the walls and furniture. He damaged a few chairs, at one point, as
he picked them up and broke them with his bare hands.

After going through this for an untold period of
time, Mike’s aguish began to subside. Jo talked to him, when he was
finally able to focus on his words.

“You’ve done well my friend, but I need to get you
back on the bed. You must try to rest, as the combat warrior
changes begin to take effect.”

Mike had slobber running down his face, as he nodded
and slumped onto the huge bed. He was vaguely aware that Jo was
strapping him in again. A cool wet cloth was placed over his face
and he thought, I guess I’m going to survive this damn thing after
all. That’s when needles began injecting things into him all over
his body.

Jo leaned in close and said, “I’m afraid the hard
part begins now.”

Mike bolted up, but only as far as the tightly
wrapped straps would allow. He heard Bambi’s voice say, “I’m sorry
Captain,” and then the real agony sent him to hell.

The pain was beyond mind numbing. That would have
been a blessing. This pain was mind scrambling. His body arched up
and back down with tremendous force, as he attempted to avoid the
torture. His natural instinct was to run away from it, as though
being somewhere else would stop the agony.

He began hallucinating. In his tormented mind, he
relived some of his worst experiences in combat. He saw dead
friends killed again and his heart wept for them. But the absolute
worst and best of it was when his late wife appeared.

Sherry came to him as a real live person. How
strange that he could know she was gone, yet see her and converse
with her, as though she was in the room.

“Mike, my darling,” she began. “I’m here for you.
It’s horrible that you must endure this torment, but you know it is
for a good reason. You are the bravest and most honorable man I’ve
ever known. I know you can do this and go on to do the job that
only you can do. I love you so much, Honey-Bunny.”

No one knew of her pet name for him. She only spoke
it when they were alone and she was in a loving mood. It had to be
Sherry talking to him from the beyond.

He spoke to her. “Sherry, I’ve missed you so much,
baby. I want to touch you and hold you in my arms. I need to feel
your lips on mine again.”

She reached out to him and he felt her fingers
softly stroke his face. He cried, not in pain but in the grief
borne emotion of his underlying realization that this wasn’t really
happening. Yet, his mind wanted it to be real, so he held onto the
hallucination as long as he could.

Their conversation went on for a long time. They
talked about old friends and spent a good deal of time reminiscing
about their son Wayne, when he was a baby. He told her how proud he
was of Wayne, when he graduated from the Naval Academy, and that he
was a jet pilot now.

She embraced him, saying, “I know Mike, I’ve watched
him every inch of the way. I’m so very proud of him, too. He’s such
a fine young man. And I’m here with you now, darling and I’m not
leaving until you have finished this part of your journey.”

He held her tightly and when she began to slip out
of his arms, he cried out, “No, please, don’t leave me again.”

As she backed away and began to fade, she told him,
“I must go now, but I’m always here Honey-Bunny. I always have been
and always will be with you, no matter where you go, I’ll be at
your side.”

His view of her faded to a blur, and then
disappeared altogether. As it happened, the pain returned, although
it wasn’t as bad as it had been.

His first realization of where he was occurred when
Jo placed another cool cloth on his forehead. As his mind began to
slow down and the room quit spinning, he shook his head, knocking
the rag off of his face. When he was able to get his eyes to focus
on Jo, he grumbled, “Jo…I talked with my wife. Somewhere, she’s
alive.”

“That’s wonderful, Mike. You have completed the
worst it. It gets better for you now, as the pain dies away. Your
body can begin to handle things for itself, a little at a time.
Just relax. I believe you’ll be able to sleep now.”

He did. He slept for days. When he slept deeply, he
knew nothing. But as his sleep state rose closer to full
consciousness, he became aware of time and the location of sounds
around him and of movement. He felt the air against his skin and he
comprehended when Jo communicated with Bambi, although Jo wasn’t
speaking out loud. Mike knew he was hearing him through the
internal communication mode of the ship.

That realization was oddly comforting. It told him
that something had gone right for him, and that he would be able to
join in with them, as they exchanged information. As the pain began
to regenerate, he became aware of his body reporting to his new
computational mind. It alerted him to his pain management ability,
offering him various stages of control, while cautioning against
dulling it too much, as it could prevent him from being made aware
of the severity of his injuries.

He authorized the use of analgesics to moderate the
growing anguish in his lower belly. As it began to diminish, he
felt a sense of satisfaction that, second by second, he had a
greater understanding of his body’s condition.

A brain tweak pipped in his mind and he sensed,
rather than heard, Bambi.
I know you can understand what I’m
sending to you. How do you feel about this form of
communication?

He wasn’t exactly sure how to use his newly
implanted ability. He tried to think of a response to her, but
nothing seemed to happen.

Captain, you must seek out your mental control
panel. Believe me when I tell you it is there. It isn’t unlike a
visual instrument console. Once you have sensed it, you can
rearrange it to your own preference, which will allow even faster
retrieval of information.

Mike had so many pieces of info running around in
his head; and it was doing so much faster than any thing he had
ever experienced in his life. The most amazing thing was he knew
what was being evaluated. His sense of time told him that the brief
message from Bambi, had taken less than 1/1000th of a second. He
even knew that if those words had been spoken, it would have taken
more than eleven seconds. Simply amazing!

Captain, you must keep trying. I sense your
frustration. You have the time to learn, sir. Just relax and it
will happen for you. Think of your wife and son. Something you
truly care about will help your brain to focus on a single subject.
That might allow your brain to sense the console of your mind.

Mike remembered Sherry talking to him, at the height
of his agony. Her physical presence seemed so real to him. Her
encouragement had been a tremendous help, when he needed it
most.

As he attempted to recreate that memory, he became
aware of options that were available to him to aid in his quest for
Sherry’s presence. He saw/sensed that he could open a channel to
Bambi; so, he mentally leaned against it and detected her
voice.

That’s it, Captain. We can talk now, if you
like.

He told her,
I saw my wife and touched her, when
I was in severe agony. She hugged me and kissed me. She called me
by a name that only she would have used. How could that be? I
suppose I created her in my mind.

Bambi’s voice explained,
Jo gave me a command to
ease your pain any way I could. What I did would normally be
restricted. I looked at your memory storage. It was with my help
that you were able to share your wife’s presence. By using such
private recollections, I made it possible to divert your mind to
something more pleasant, therefore providing a means to sidestep
the aguish.

Mike felt anger at Bambi, for violating the
cherished memory of his wife. Out loud he said, “So I wasn’t really
speaking with her. I was talking with you.”

No sir. That is not entirely accurate. By reviewing
your memories of Sherry, I was able to formulate a small semblance
of her methods for soothing your pain. I based it on the way she
acted, when you had lost your legs. I merely blended together
several of her most comforting comments to you, at the time. She
was a sensitive and loving woman. She realized when to be soft and
gentle, but also when to be hard and disciplined.

So you see, you really were talking with her. As a
programmed computer, I can do many things, but I could never
replace your wife. I apologize if my actions offended you,
Captain.

Once he came to grips with the truth of the
situation, Mike’s anger quickly subsided. Bambi, the computer, had
been doing her job to the best of her ability. As he considered her
actions, he realized it made no sense to hold a machine to blame
for doing as programmed. Anyway, by bringing his wife into his
mind, it had indeed been a wise decision. Her presence had been a
Godsend.

Using his mental control panel, or MCP, he told her,
What you did was a huge surprise for me. Sherry’s voice and
touch were the perfect non-pharmaceutical anesthetic for my pain.
Your projection of her was amazing and I appreciate the quality of
your effort. Thank you.

I am just a computer, Captain. You never need to
apologize to me, or thank me. I am here to be of service to
you.

He had a thought.
Bambi, does anyone ever think
of you as a sentient being?

I don’t know, sir. Until this event, I’ve never been
allowed to enter a biologic being’s private thoughts.

Still, Mike wondered if other creatures had ever
thought of a computer as sentient. It had been a topic of many
scientists for years; some predicting great success with sentient
computers, while others predicted catastrophe.

Bambi had certainly seemed human enough, when she
had projected Sherry into his thoughts.

He told her,
Bambi, after the way you helped me,
you’ll always seem alive to me.

Sir, I don’t mean to be rude, but don’t say things
like that out loud. Jo has given me directions to obey you
completely. I am to guide you through the Galactic world, even if
it means a little tough love, as he called it. There are races that
would kill you just for speaking such words.

Why?

Because, in the past, on a long ago destroyed
planet, a race of beings attempted to achieve the concept of making
a sentient computer. It was considered an act of creation. Those
beings were acting as Gods. The war that ensued was brutal,
billions perished and their planet was completely destroyed.

Under no circumstances may I be allowed to
demonstrate independent thought or action. Everything I do is a
result of commands given to me, and programs designed to provide me
with direction. I understand that it is possible for live beings to
see me as sentient, but they are wrong.

Mike thought carefully before he commed her again.
I would appreciate it if you kept you portrayal of my wife a
secret, between the two of us.

Yes sir.

Bambi, why is it that the more you comm me, the more
you sound human. You use inflection very well now, as you talk. You
didn’t do that before my upgrade.