Breaking Through the Waves (3 page)

“Have you ever been drunk before?”

“No.”

“Because you don’t like alcohol or because you know your limits?”

“I hardly drink alcohol because I don’t trust myself. My mom was a mean drunk and I probably am too.” She let that fact slip from her lips without thinking. That was something she never told anyone. He didn’t react at all, bringing the glass to his lips for another drink. “And I just couldn’t trust anyone to not take advantage of me except Henry, and he wasn’t always there. It just gives me peace of mind when I don’t drink at all.”

“You’re drinking now.”

“I know you’ll take care of me. And it’s just a glass of wine—nothing too crazy.”

“Would you like to get drunk? See if you are a crazy drunk?”

“Not really.”

“What if we stayed home and it was just us two?”

She shrugged. “Maybe.”

“I won’t let you do anything stupid and if you are mean to me, I’ll put up with it.”

“Why would you want to do that?”

“Because I know you aren’t a mean drunk. I just want to prove it to you.”

“How do you know that?”

“
Most people aren’t that different when they’re drunk. Yes, their emotions are heightened and they have less inhibition, but they really aren’t different people. You are friendly, quiet, and mellow. You would probably be the same if you were drunk. You definitely wouldn’t start cursing at everyone and throwing swings.”

“What are you like when you’re drunk?”

“People tell me I laugh a lot.”

“So you are fun?”

“I guess.”

“That’s a bad combination.
A fun drunk and a mean one.”

“You wouldn’t be a mean drunk.”

“We’ll see.”

The waitress brought their food. “Do you need anything else?”

“Can we have a bottle of this wine to go?”

“Of course.”
She walked away.

Sydney raised an eyebrow. “You want to do this tonight?”

“Not necessarily. It’ll be there if you ever decide to.”

“I drink Tequila sometimes. It helps me sleep.”

“How much were you drinking?”

“Half a bottle straight.”

“Wait. What? When was this?”

She was quiet for a moment.
“When you were gone.”

He sighed. “Don’t ever do that again, Sydney.”

“Okay,” she said automatically. She cut into her pasta and took a bite. Coen ate his dinner with grace, never spilling anything on the table or hardly using his napkin. When she was finished, she wiped her mouth with the napkin then placed it on the table. She stared at Coen across from her, admiring the beauty of his features.

“What are you thinking about?”

“What I always think about.”

He smiled. “Damn. I am good.”

“That’s an understatement.”

“I wonder if I’ll ever tame you.”

“I find it unlikely.”

“That’s just as well.”

The waitress brought the tab and Coen slid the money into the sleeve, handing it back to her. “I don’t need any change.”

Sydney watched her walk away. “Since we are in a relationship, I would like to take turns paying for things.”

“No.”

“No?”

“That’s never going to happen.”

“Why?”

“You’re my lady. I take care of you.”

“We are both in college, totally broke.”

“I’m not broke. My parents pay for my education and I make plenty of money as a trainer. I could get my own place without roommates, I just choose to live with other people so I can save more money. I pay for everything. That’s settled.”

She glared at him. “I don’t accept that.”

“Too bad,” he said as he rose to a stand. He grabbed the bottle of wine then her hand. They left the restaurant and returned to the car, placing the bottle in the back seat. “Let’s walk on the beach.”

She crossed her arms over her chest as she walked beside him.

He wrapped his arm around her waist. “Come on, Syd. Don’t be mad.”

“I’m a feminist. I believe in an equal partnership. I want to carry my own weight.”

“You do. You make love to me. That’s worth more than cash.”

“You make love to me too. We’re even in that department. This is a give and take relationship. Get used to it. I won’t change my mind.”

He sighed. “Look, I understand what you’re saying and I respect it. When we get married, we can split bills and all that junk, but when we go out, I would like to treat you.”

“When we get married?”

“I don’t mean right now, but someday.”

“You want to get married someday?”

He raised an eyebrow. “I told you I loved you, didn’t I? I only date women that I’m serious about, women that I can actually see myself marrying. If I didn’t feel that way, I would just sleep with you then take off.”

“So you wanted to marry Audrey?”

“In the beginning of the relationship, I could see it. But after that, definitely not. I was trying to end the relationship more than I was trying to keep it together. When she cheated on me, I knew she didn’t love me. She just liked fucking me.” He looked at her. “But I do want to marry you. There’s no doubt about that. I know I’m not going to change my mind.”

She said nothing for a long time. “I feel the same way.”

He smiled. “Good. I know I said that I loved Audrey at one point, but when I think about my feelings for you, I realize I never did. And if I did, it pales in comparison to my love for you.”

“I
feel the same way about Aaron.”

He grabbed her hand and th
ey continued to walk on the beach, kicking up sand with their toes. “So, is that okay?”

“What?”

“That I pay for everything?”

“I still don’t like it. I don’t pay rent and my tuition is free. All the money I make at the aquarium goes into my savings account. I have money too.”

He sighed. “I’ll feel more comfortable if I take care of you. I want to take care of you. Please let me do that.”

“But I don’t need someone to take care of me.”

“Then humor me.”

“Fine.”

He smiled. “Thank you.”

They looked at the water as it shined under the moon. Her dress flapped in the wind, showing her legs under the dress.

“You really don’t need someone to take care of you?” he asked sadly. “Because I need you to take care of me.”

She looked at him. “I meant in terms of financial stability. Coen, I do need you to take care of me in other ways, in ways that money can never buy. I’ve never called anyone, sobbing, and asked them to come to me. I’ve never been that weak before.”

“It’s not weak, Syd.”

“It feels like it.”

“As soon as I find myself on hard times, you’ll be the first person I run to. You are a safe haven to me.”

She smiled. “You’re my safe haven too.”

“When Brutus died, I cried for days. I’m not ashamed to admit it. If people think it makes me look weak, I really don’t care. I loved someone with my whole heart and then I lost him. When you called me, it was brave to open yourself up like that, exposing yourself to vulnerability. I knew he would die one day. I still loved him anyway.”

She watched him as he walked next to her, his eyes on a distant memory.

“And when the dreams that haunt you come and frighten you, it’s okay to be scared. It’s okay to reach for me. I’m not going to judge you for it. I just wish you would tell me what frightens you so much. I know you don’t believe me, but I can help you get through it and move on. I suspect you won’t tell me because you chose to push it to the back of your mind, hoping it would go away on its own. I can tell you right now that it won’t.” She averted her gaze. “I’ve had clients that were beaten and assaulted in the streets. When they finally came to me, they told me what happened. They were afraid to tell their loved ones to spare them the pain, but when they were talking to me, it was therapeutic.” She still didn’t say anything. “I’m not pressuring you to tell me what haunts you. I’m just saying that you’ll feel better once you do.”

“You’re probably right.”

“I am right.”

3

When they got home, they went straight into the bedroom, leaving the bottle of wine on the couch, forgotten.

Coen touched the straps of her dress and slipped each one off until the dress fell to the floor. He pressed his forehead against hers as he unclasped her bra and let it fall. When she was just standing in her underwear, he kissed her body everywhere, relishing the taste of her skin. “Give me a minute,” he whispered into her ear. He licked his tongue across her neck then down her shoulder, making her spine shiver. Then, he grabbed her breasts and squeezed them gently, cupping them in his large hands. His eyes were wide with excitement as he explored her. It didn’t matter how many times he had done it. He was still obsessed with touching her everywhere. The tan color of her skin reminded him of a golden pineapple. Sunkissed. Her skin was soft and smooth even though she swam in the ocean almost every day. Her hands weren’t calloused even though she worked as a custodian. She was a direct contradiction to everything she did. When his hands glided down her ribs, he saw a thin line, almost impossible to see. It looked like a scratch. He caressed it with his fingers while she looked at him, waiting for him to comment on it. When he didn’t, she tried not to look relieved.

Tired of waiting for him to finish, she stripped off his clothes and studied his body. His skin was flawless even though he was a trainer
and had been in more physical sparring matches than she would ever know. He flexed his chest muscles when she touched him, showing her he was strong. He didn’t need to do that because she already knew how muscular he was. He just liked to prove a point. There was no trace of damage anywhere on his body. He was lucky he escaped unscathed. “You’re so beautiful,” she said as she felt his broad shoulders. “And not just on the outside.”

“There’s no comparison,” he said as he kissed her gently, parting her lips with his tongue. His tongue danced around hers. The parting of their lips and the quiet moans fell on their ears, exciting both of them. He guided her to the bed then laid her down, crawling on top of her. She opened her legs and felt him push against her.

She broke their kiss. “Lie down.”

He read her mind. He knew she wanted to go down on him. “I want to make love.”

“You do?”

“I’m so in love with you,” he said as he kissed her.

Hot tears sprang from her eyes and one dripped down her cheek. The emotion escaped for a moment then disappeared in light of their passion. She could never find the words to explain how she felt about him, how she loved him.

Her hands ran down hi
s back, memorizing every muscle under his skin. She knew his body better than he did. When he breathed into her mouth, she felt even more excited. The heat was always there between them. Just a kiss was enough to light a fire in between her legs. He always sent her to the edge of pleasure, almost making her come before they actually had sex. Before he actually entered inside her, she was brewing with sexual frustration. She grabbed a condom then ripped it open. He leaned over her and let her roll it onto his cock. It twitched as she touched it. When she squeezed him gently then ran her thumb over the tip, he moaned quietly. He inserted the tip inside her, pushing his large head entirely in, before he made the plunge. As soon as he was fully inside her, she felt her walls crumble.

“I’m coming already.”

He moved into her harder, kissing her while he ran his hands through her hair.

She scratched his back, digging her nails into his skin as her body sh
ook with her high. It felt so good every time. She bit her lip as she moaned loudly, feeling him move inside until her orgasm was completely gone.

Coen locked his eyes onto hers, moving into her slowly and deeply. Just because she came didn’t mean he wanted this to end. He never wanted their lovemaking to end. She was the most amazing girl he
’d ever met in his life. She was the one, his everything. He’d never had a friend who meant as much to him, a girlfriend he loved more than his own family, or a lover that satisfied all of his needs. For him, there was nobody else. She was it.

Tears sprang from his eyes as the emotion rocked through him. “I love you so much, Sydney.”

She touched his face, kissing his tears away. “I love you, Coen.”

When his body started to shake, he knew he couldn’t hold on much longer. The moment was too perfect and pure for him to contain it anymore. He stared into her eyes as he came inside her, completely depleting himself. The orgasm felt good, but the feeling in his heart felt better. He had never been broken, but now he felt completely whole. He didn’t realize something was missing in his heart until now. She was the missing piece to his tower. The small but irreplaceable part that completed the entire piece, arranged the entire puzzle. She was the muse to his painting, the light to the stars,
the moon to the sky.

He pulled out then l
ay beside her, his heart still heavy with emotion. He pulled off the condom then tossed it in the trash before he held her to his chest, squeezing her so tightly he thought he would explode. Sydney saw the depth of his love for her. It was obvious.

She knew she had to tell him the truth of her past. It would hurt them both but they could get through it together. He
would still love her and want her just as much as he did now. In fact, he may love her more.