Breaking Shaun (24 page)

Even when she’s being a bitch, there’s something so sexy about her.

Maybe I was still high from the mind-blowing orgasm I’d experienced, but there was just something about Natalie. She would speak her mind with no hesitation, and she wasn’t intimidated by me at all. I liked it. It was nice to finally find a woman who was confident and not ashamed to take what she wanted without feeling the need to justify it. Only time would tell if she was any different from the other women I’d been with, but I had a feeling I had finally met my match.

As I pulled into Asia and Marcus’s driveway, I could sense Natalie getting nervous. Her grip tightened on her purse, and her posture turned rigid. She was worried we would be found out, and I could understand why. Honestly, I didn’t give a shit who knew. I’d never been good at keeping secrets. But if that was how she wanted it, I guessed I would play along.

When I parked the car, Natalie turned to give me a tight smile. “Thanks for the ride.”

I grinned and winked at her statement, and her real smile came out.

“It was my pleasure. Trust me.”

I rubbed my sweaty hands on my dress as I made my way to Asia’s front door. Taking a deep breath, I tried to relax before ringing the doorbell.

Nothing happened. Nothing happened.

A few seconds after pressing the button, Marcus opened the door. He was standing there in a pair of black shorts with no shirt, and he was covered in sweat. I thought I actually gasped.

Luckily, in the next second, a white T-shirt came flying through the air, and it landed on Marcus’s head, covering half his face. He turned and saw Asia approaching. She was too busy laughing at Marcus with a T-shirt covering half his head to tell us why she’d thrown it.

Marcus and I started laughing, too, and he took the shirt down and started putting it on.

When Asia finally stopped, she told Marcus, “Babe, you can’t go walking around with no shirt on all the time. You’re way too fucking hot, and it makes people uncomfortable.”

Marcus smiled at her and then looked over at me. I instantly blushed and covered my face with my hands.

“See!” she shouted.

Then, we were all laughing.

Marcus cleared his throat. “Ahem. Well, I’m just gonna…” He pointed to something behind Asia and left.

Asia and I both smiled at each other.

“I’m just here to get my car. Sorry I didn’t call earlier. I realized that I don’t have your number,” I told Asia.

“Well, here, let me give it to you.”

I pulled out my phone, and Asia told me her number, so I entered it into my Contacts.

“I know you don’t work during the days, so if you ever want to come hang out or anything, just give me a call. Marcus and I are usually around, and we have the pool and the beach here if you just want to come relax.”

I smiled at Asia as I dropped my phone back in my purse. I was flattered that she considered me a friend, and she was making an effort to make me feel welcome.

“That’s really nice of you to offer. I’ll do that. Thanks.”

Before I could turn to leave, Asia put her hand on my arm, and her face got serious.

“I know my brother acts like an asshole,” she told me, raising her eyebrows. “But he’s really a good guy. He’s hell-bent on never settling down though. You should know that going into this.”

I grimaced before asking, “Is it that obvious?”

She smiled and shrugged. “He’s my brother. I know he always gets what he wants…if he wants it enough.”

Well, so much for keeping things a secret.

I knew it would only be a matter of time before everyone knew Shaun and I’d had sex now that Asia was on to us. I’d found it funny that she warned me about Shaun never wanting to settle down. I wondered if she would have been less concerned if she knew I was just as reluctant to be in a relationship as he was. I wasn’t used to my private life being common knowledge, but then again, I’d never really had friends to tell even if I’d wanted to.

As I drove to Nick’s apartment, I couldn’t help but daydream. The image of Shaun’s eyes staring at me through his mirror flashed in my mind, and I rubbed my fingertips over my lips as I remembered the way he’d kissed me. There was no question that he was the best I’d ever had. The way he’d teased me and effortlessly driven me to the edge was something I’d never experienced, and I wanted more.

God, I wanted more.

My night with Brad felt like a distant memory.
But it isn’t, is it?
I was with him two days ago.

And there it was again—the shame and guilt following me like my shadow, darkening every light moment. It was funny how I was feeling like a slut for having been with two guys in a span of two days, but if I were a man, I’d be happy, proud even.

Well, fuck that.
I wasn’t going to feel bad for doing something that had felt good, for taking something I’d wanted. It was time I let it go and allowed myself to be happy—or at least try.

When I walked into Nick’s apartment, he was already gone. I’d forgotten he had to work. That bought me some time to figure out how to tell Nick about Shaun and me. The only problem was, I wasn’t sure what to say. He knew I’d moved here for a fresh start, but I didn’t think he really understood just how unhappy I had been before I came here.

I figured if I was going to change, I would also have to learn to let people in and be vulnerable for once. That would probably be the hardest part of all this. I’d spent so much of my life keeping things bottled up that I wasn’t sure if I was capable of doing anything else.

It was three in the afternoon, and I’d been sitting in my office at the shop, staring off into space, since two. I was still replaying this morning in my mind, and every time I had, all I could think was how I wanted more. I typically didn’t take my time when I fucked women. Now, if they wanted to play, I was all for it, but I’d never gone out of my way to drive someone to the edge the way I had with Natalie. I fucking loved it. She was so responsive, like she’d been waiting months to have my dick inside her.

Shit.

Baseball. Baseball. Baseball.

Leaning forward, I rested my elbows on the desk and clasped my hands in front of me. This girl had me strung already, and I’d only been with her once. I rocked back in my chair and stared at my ceiling for a few seconds before deciding to go home. We weren’t busy, and I really didn’t need to be here anyway. What I needed was my board and the endless ocean under me.

I stood and began straightening up my desk. Then, my phone started ringing in my pocket. I grabbed it to see that it was Dre.

“What’s up?”

“Shaun, man, sorry I didn’t make it to your party last night. I had some bullshit goin’ on out here. What are you doin’ tonight?” Dre asked.

I heard his car door close and his engine start.

“I was just gonna chill at my apartment tonight. Why? What’s up?”

“Nothin’. You know, the usual. How about I bring some drinks over?”

I walked out of my office and locked the door.

“Come by around seven or eight. I’m about to hit the beach for a few hours.”

“All right. Later.”

“Bye.”

Slipping my Ray-Bans on, I made my way out into the parking lot. I could tell something was bothering Dre, but there was no way I would get anything out of him until he was drunk.

Even the fucking beach was reminding me of Natalie now.
This is bullshit.
I couldn’t stand just waiting around. I’d never done what people told me in the past.
So, why am I starting now?

Because you want to fuck her again. Because you want to see her again. Because you want her.

I tossed my surfboard down on the sand and fell onto my back next to it. The sky was dark and ominous. A storm was coming, but I didn’t care. It was nice having the beach to myself.

Usually, once I’d gotten what I wanted from a woman, the magic was gone, the thrill of the chase was over, and it was easy to move on. This thing with Natalie was different. Getting a taste of her had only made me crave her more. I still felt like I was chasing her. I should be happy that she wasn’t attached or swooning over me.

That’s exactly what I want.
There had been no pressure, no awkward moment where I had to explain that I didn’t want more than sex.
I’ve had her, so why can’t I stop thinking about her?

Women like me break men like you.

Sitting up, I looked out at the horizon.

The ocean was my freedom, and it reminded me every day why I loved it so much. I wasn’t sure what kind of men Natalie had dealt with in the past, but I was sure they hadn’t been anything like me. If she thought she was going to break me, she was sadly mistaken.