I sighed and said, “The hacker community doesn’t know Ice is a girl, but the Russians and NSA do, and I’ll always have to watch my back to be sure they don’t figure out the new Harmony is the chick they’re after. No one can ever see me without my contacts. You, Duke, Gonzo, and Bash know about my eyes. If I come back into your life as Harmony, and they mention my eyes to the wrong person?” I looked at him a few seconds, let it sink in, and said, “It’s too big of a risk.”
“Then we’ll move far, far away, so they don’t know I’m with you.”
I’d finished eating, but he still needed to pay, so it was the perfect opportunity for me to lose him. He’d find me again, sure, but I needed to get away from him long enough to pull my thoughts together.
“No, Brain. I’m sorry for being the catalyst of your break with Duke, and the rest of your friends in Chattanooga. I know you’re sorry for the way things worked out, too, and I accept your apology. I didn’t know about the identity auctions before, and now I do, so thanks for that. I screwed your MC, but then I did what I could to make it right. Drop your guilt, you don’t have to take care of me, or atone for anything. We’re square.”
I let the piece of hair go back across my face before I left the restaurant, and walked straight to the CNN center, pulling an employee badge from a pocket of my fatigues before I entered the building. I swiped it to gain entrance to the employee section, nodded at a guard as if I belonged, and kept walking. I had the map of the area in my head, and in five minutes I was walking through the overhead enclosed walkway to the hotel across the street, and in another three minutes I was in a cab.
The idea he was a werewolf was ridiculous, but when I thought back to the ways he’d found me when he chased me before, I’d only lost him when I got into a vehicle not on rails. I didn’t
really
think he could track me by smell, but if thinking of him in those terms would help me stay away from him…
I took three cabs, and then walked the final couple of blocks to my hotel, knowing for sure I’d lost him.
Imagine my surprise when he was sitting in the hallway floor across from my room, busy doing something on his phone.
He smiled when he saw me, as if I shouldn’t be freaked. As if I should’ve expected him to be waiting for me. “Ah, there you are. I thought maybe we could finish our conversation?”
Brain
Showing up at her hotel had been a risk, but I hoped by waiting outside instead of breaking in, I’d show her I was respecting
some
of her boundaries.
“How’d you find me?”
I let an eyebrow lift as I asked, “Really?”
She rolled her eyes, turned away from me, and walked towards the elevator. “You aren’t welcome in my room. You want to talk, we’ll go downstairs to the bar.”
We rode down the elevator in silence, and I followed her to the bar. She sat at a booth away from the others, her back in a corner, and I sat opposite her, though I wanted to push her farther into the booth and sit beside her.
The waitress was still a half dozen steps away when Ice told her, “Long Island, extra long, and keep ’em coming.”
I lifted a brow at her, but asked the waitress, “You got anything from Sweetwater?”
She nodded and rattled off a few, but since I didn’t hear what I wanted, I told her, “Darkest thing you have from them.”
When she was gone, I eyed Ice a few minutes before saying, “I’d begun to wonder if you even drank, Buttercup. Never known you to, before.”
She shook her head. “Not when someone’s chasing me, and I’m careful when I do, because I have to make sure I’m safe and there’s no chance I’ll need a clear head, later. You seem dead set on treating me with kid gloves, even though you won’t just go the fuck away. I don’t want to deal with you sober, and if I fall captive again while you’re supposed to be taking care of my drunk ass, I’ll
never
forgive you. So… fuckitall. I’m drinking.”
My heart warmed, and I told her, “Thanks for trusting me.”
She shook her head, “Fuck me over and I’ll fuck you over,
Thurston
. The media seems to have forgotten about the black sheep of the family, and while your family might be able to make the mainstream media keep quiet, if the tabloids and gossip blogs got the right kind of juicy info, even the main news outlets would have to say
something
about you.”
My wolf wanted to lash out at her for the threat, but I knew she just needed to be sure I knew she had leverage. I’m bigger, stronger, faster, and just as smart — she needed to even the playing field. So, I merely nodded and said, “Not going to fuck you over, so it won’t be a problem. I’ll warn you, though, if you decide to go that route, cover your ass so my father and big brother can’t find you. They can be brutal, and I don’t want you hurt.”
“Even if I get hurt by going after you and your family?”
I nodded, and hoped she could see the sincerity in my eyes. “Even if.”
She sighed and asked, “Buttercup?”
“You aren’t sure what I should call you, I’ll come up with something on my own. Deal with it.”
I grinned at her mock glare, but searched my head for a way to change the subject. She needed to be reminded of what we had in common, and I wanted to lighten the mood, so I brought up some of the latest hardware advances, and what I thought I could do with them when they hit the market. We talked for an hour, and she had three Long Island Iced Teas during our spirited, geek-infused, barely-English conversation.
As I noted she was getting too tipsy and should probably back off, she ordered yet another, and I asked, “You sure?”
She nodded, and I told the waitress, “I’ve got her. Bring her what she wants, and get me another beer, please.”
With my werewolf metabolism, I couldn’t even get a buzz from beer, no matter how much I drank, so I was safe to imbibe and still take care of her — and I had a feeling I’d be holding her while she puked before much longer.
When I finally got Ice into her room, she sat in a chair, held a foot in the air, and said, “Take it off. I’m hot.”
Deliberately misunderstanding her, I took my vest off, draped it over the back of the sofa, and then pulled my t-shirt off.
I smelled her arousal, and… something else. This drunk, she shouldn’t be wary and concerned, but she was. I’d need to go slow, find out what she was worried about before I pushed somewhere I shouldn’t.
When she’d told me the Russians knew she was a girl, her smell had been acrid, bitter. Not fear so much as a horrible memory, something deep in her psyche. The memory of unimaginable pain, agony, humiliation, and utter desolation.
Now, she rolled her eyes and said, “No, fuckwad. Take my
boots
off. Sheesh, do I have to spell
everything
out for you? Thought you were s’posed to be smart.”
I grinned and went to one knee, bracing her shoe against my leg as I unlaced her kick-ass boots. She’d worn feminine clothes when she didn’t think I was watching. The fact she’d felt the need to look tough, and not girly, should probably tell me something.
Hell, I knew what it said. She didn’t want me to see her as a weak girl, but a strong, smart, hacker who was my equal. I worried it might say more, though.
I took her boots and socks off, sat back, and gave her a foot massage. I’d originally thought I’d take the opportunity to seduce her, but she was sloppy drunk, not just tipsy, and it felt wrong to take advantage. I have nothing against fucking women who’ve let themselves get to this point, but… not Ice. Not my Buttercup.
She slouched lower and lower in the chair, and I finally picked her up and moved her to the sofa. I sat on the other end, propped her feet in my lap, and kept up with the foot massage.
“Couple things you need to know before we fuck,” she said, her voice slurred, her tone mellow.
Instead of informing her it wasn’t going to happen tonight, I said, “Okay. What’s the first thing?”
“I don’t do missionary, and not a fan of doggie. I’m on top. I ride you.”
I wasn’t sure it was even possible for me to orgasm with the girl on top. My wolf needed to dominate, to overwhelm, to fuck someone into the ground. Now wasn’t the time to argue, though, so without agreeing to her terms, I asked, “What else?”
“You saw my piercing, before. Thanks for not asking. Need you to
keep
not asking, and don’t look, and don’t undo it, and don’t try to mess with my clit. I’ll take care of my own orgasms, thank-you-very-much. Just need your cock to stand up long enough I can get m’self off.”
I’d never be able to trick sober-Ice into telling me something she didn’t want me to know, and there was a good chance I couldn’t trick drunk-Ice, either, but it was worth a try.
“What am I supposed to not look at?”
“What’s under the piercing.”
“I assume your clit is under it, based on my memory of the location, though I tried to give you your privacy and not look too close.”
“Congratulations. You know female anatomy. Now keep the fuck away from it.”
I opted to let it go, for now, and asked, “You’re always on top?”
Her face grew serious, her words still slurred, but not as bad. “Yes. Always on top. No ‘ceptions.”
No way around it, we’d need to talk — with her sober — before we had sex.
Almost as if she’d read my mind she sat up, crawled across the sofa, and into my lap with her legs straddling me. She pressed herself into my cock, which wasn’t rock hard, but wasn’t exactly soft either.
She groaned as she ground on me, her eyes closed and her face the picture of bliss. I let her twist and pivot on my lap a few minutes, watching her face and her lithe body as it moved, and then I pulled her to me, brought her lips to mine, and gave her the kind of kiss I’d wanted to lay on her for fucking
months
.
Even with her in my lap, her head wasn’t higher than mine, and I pillaged her mouth, let her know she may be on top, but it was only because I was allowing it, for the time being. She let me kiss her, take her mouth, for a handful of seconds, and then her scent went bitter and acrid again, and she froze.
I pulled back to see a vacant look in her eyes, and touched her cheek as I said, “Ice? Destiny? Buttercup? Come back to me. You’re safe. We’re just foolin’ around.”
I kept talking, kept reassuring, and thirty seconds later her eyes finally focused on me again, and I held her enough to be sure she didn’t fall as she leapt backwards off my lap, but not enough to restrain her. The stench of terror filled the room, and her heartbeat was as rapid as I’d ever heard a humans.
“You need to go,” she said, her words no longer slurred.
I shook my head. “No, I need to stick around and keep you safe. No more kissing until we talk about what just happened, though. Do you need something? Coke, or coffee, or something to eat?”
“Yeah, Coke and salty fries would be good. Can you order me some from room service?” She’d gone from sloppy drunk to sober from the effect of my kiss. It wasn’t a panic attack, exactly, but I’d bet money it was some form of PTSD. She’d been gone, no longer here, and her body had burned away the alcohol while she was gone.
I placed the order, and had a rare burger sent up for me while I was at it. My wolf wanted to tear apart whoever had hurt our Buttercup, but all I could give him was rare meat, right now.
“Any security precaution on the room I should know about?”
She shook her head. “The phone’ll ring twice and stop if the hotel makes another key card for the room, but their system isn’t capable of letting me know if someone uses a key card. Doesn’t matter, since you don’t need one for the elevator, though.”
“The auction house doesn’t know this identity?”
“No. Just the one I gave them, and she’s staying in the penthouse of another hotel. I’ve gone in and out enough to look like I’m staying there, and I have trips and cams set up, so I know if anyone tries to get in there, or actually gets in.”
“Smart. As far as I know, they can be trusted, but I like knowing you’re still careful, still taking precautions.”
“The Russians and NSA lost the threads leading to me years ago, but there’s always the chance something will trigger somewhere, point them at me. Surfacing to do this deal was a risk, as is evidenced by you finding me.”
“Only because I knew you’d eventually bid on an identity. I hacked into their servers months ago, and then investigated every person who bid on someone I thought you might be interested in, until I found you. No one else knew to look for you in this venue.”
I was still on the sofa, but she was sitting in an upholstered chair, now. She was on edge, hyped up, but trying to appear relaxed. “Why spend so much time and attention finding me again?”
“You’re under my skin. I want to know you better, want to spend time with you. Nothing else, Buttercup. Been a long time since I found a woman I could hold a conversation with and not want to put a ball-gag in her mouth.”
She grinned, but it didn’t go to her eyes.
When our food arrived, she sobered even more as she ate. My kissing her had acted as a cold shower, but neither of us brought it up.
She was obviously sleepy as she finished her meal, and I asked, “I slept with you once before and kept my hands to myself. Do you trust me to take care of you close up, or would you rather I took the sofa?”
“I’m sober, you don’t have to stay.”
“And yet, I told you I would, so I will. Tell me where you want me.”
“If you’re gonna be stubborn, I’ll take the sofa. You’re too big for it.”
I shook my head. “No. I want to be between you and the door. You’ll be in your bed, the only question is where I’ll be.”
She threw her arms up and headed towards the bedroom. “Fine, ass-hat. Whatever. You keep your shorts on, and don’t come in until I give the all clear. I’m gonna change.”
Was she saying she trusted me to sleep in the bed with her, and not push it?