Bound to be Tested: Emergence, Book 3 (6 page)

Jason shook his head, nowhere near done. “How dare you show up here at my club after two years? The only excuse I ever came up with in my mind for your stupidity was that you had contracted some incurable disease and selfishly left to avoid some misguided notion that you didn’t want Lori to watch you die a slow death.”

Jason stepped up to his old friend and leaned into his face. “Here you are, and you aren’t fucking dead. That really pisses me off.”

Jude hadn’t said a word. He’d let Jason rant until he was exhausted and had said his piece. He wasn’t an ass about it. He maintained eye contact the entire time, which infuriated Jason more.

“I’m sorry.” Jude was tired. His eyes were bloodshot, and dark circles surrounded them. The man looked like he hadn’t slept in weeks.

Jason found it hard to care. “That’s it? You’re fucking sorry?” He flung his hands up in the air in exasperation.

“Yes. Unfortunately that’s all I’m at liberty to disclose.”

“At liberty to disclose? What sort of highfalutin jargon is that?” He turned and punched a hole in the drywall, thankful he’d missed a two-by-four.

“It’s all I’ve got, man.” Jude dipped his head.

“Well, it’s not good enough.” Jason flexed his sore fingers. “You were my friend. Forget what you did to Lori. I thought you and I were friends. You were the head Dom at
my
club. You nearly ran this place. I’d have given my right arm for you. What the fuck are you doing back here?”

“I’m going to retire soon. I came back to finish my last year with the Army National Guard unit.”

“Retire? You’re what? Thirty-eight?”

“Yep. That’s twenty years in the military.” Jude stood, his hands hanging loose at his side. “I wish there was something else I could say.”

“Well, if there isn’t, then there’s no reason to continue this conversation.” Jason pointed at the door. “Get out. Get the fuck out and don’t come back here. Stay away from Lori. Stay away from Emergence. Whatever rock you crawled out from under, go back there. Leave.”

Jude nodded. He didn’t say another word. He lifted his head and walked out the door.

Jason stood rooted to his spot as he listened to the back door to the building open and slam shut. He shook as he lowered his arm finally. “Fuck.”

Carlton saw the car pull out of the back parking lot as he pulled in. He eased into his spot, gripping the steering wheel and taking deep breaths before he exited the car.

When he entered, he found Jason standing in the middle of his office, wincing and flexing his hand. A quick glance behind the man told him why. “You okay?” He grinned. It wasn’t funny, but he’d never seen Jason angry enough to punch anything. He knew the man would never harm another human being, but he was surprised to find he’d at least gotten pissed enough to hit something inanimate.

“Did you do that before he left or after?”

“Before.” Jason shook out his fingers. “It took every bit of willpower I could muster to avoid punching the bastard in the face.”

Jason stomped across the room and sat at his desk. He spread his fingers wide on the surface and breathed deeply.

Carlton waited a moment before he continued, “Did you at least learn anything?”

“Not a damn thing. That jackass sat there in that chair…” he nodded to the one Carlton had vacated earlier, “…and listened to me scream and yell at him for ten minutes. He didn’t so much as flinch. And when I finished, he had nothing to say for himself. Infuriating man.”

“Jeez.” What the hell was Jude all about? “I assumed the man had died.”

Jason laughed so hard, Carlton jumped. “That’s exactly what I told him. Without the body bag, I don’t want to see his rat face in my club.”

“Okay then. Duly noted.” Carlton stepped back. What else could he do? “Did you check on the women? Are they okay?”

“Yes.” Jason shuffled papers in front of him, not looking up, his hands shaking, though he tried his damnedest to hide it.

Carlton swallowed. He would have liked a bit more information than that, but now wasn’t the time to harp on the issue. “Okay. I’ll leave you alone. Yell if you need me.”

When he reached the door, Jason called out, “Fuck no, they aren’t okay. Did I just tell you yes?”

Carlton spun around to see Jason’s expression, but Jason was already clicking the mouse of his computer, not glancing in Carlton’s direction.

Evidently, if Carlton wanted more details, he was going to have to go check on the women himself.

Jude sat outside Lori’s apartment in his truck, watching her front door as though on surveillance. If anyone saw him they would surely call the police. He felt like a pervert.

Getting her address had been fun. There was no way he could have asked Jason for it, considering how angry the man was. So, Jude had used Google. Search engines gave out way too much information on people. It unnerved him.

It wasn’t that he intended to confront her. Jason had made it clear she was off limits. He just wanted to see her. He wanted to know she was okay. At least that’s what he told himself.

“If you hurt her, you’re going to have to answer to me.”

Jude jerked in his seat at the sound of the voice outside his open window. He turned to find the gorgeous submissive from Friday night standing tall at his side, her weight on one leg, a suitcase next to her.

She narrowed her gaze at him. “What do you want anyway?”

He opened his mouth, but the truth was he had no answer. He’d found himself tongue-tied a lot lately. “I don’t know.”

She stepped closer, her face inches from his. “Look…” she glanced around, “…I’m not stupid. I know you love her. And I know she once loved you too. I can’t tell you how she feels now. I don’t think she can either. But if you’re back from the great beyond and intend to stay, don’t torment her. Man up. Come to the fucking door and tell her what you have to say.”

He swallowed around the lump in his throat. “That doesn’t seem prudent.”

“Why? Because Jason told you to stay the fuck away from her?” She tipped her head to one side and leaned closer as though this were a great big secret and she didn’t want the neighbors to hear. “Don’t look at me like that. I’m sure you met with him. No, he didn’t tell us, but I’m an astute woman. And I know what he would have said to you.”

“You’re right.”

She cocked a hip. “Okay then. Listen, I’ve been with Lori for a year. I’m not happy about this, but I’m not stupid. Let me make a suggestion. You have clearly lost your words for the time being. How about you go back to wherever you’re staying and think long and hard about what you’re about to do. If it seems there’s no other option than to face Lori head-on, then do it. But don’t come in half-cocked without a clear intention. You owe her that much.”

Jude stared at her, unable to respond.

“That’s what I thought.” She shook her head. “Consider people’s feelings for a moment. I love Lori too. She’s my Domme. If you fuck with her, I will hunt you down.”

Margaret turned and walked away. She pulled her suitcase toward a car and loaded it in the trunk. Another bag was slung over her shoulder, and she tossed it in the backseat before she entered the vehicle. Without glancing back, she drove away.

Holy fuck
. Had she left Lori? It sure looked that way. Maybe she hadn’t moved out entirely, but obviously they’d exchanged words. He turned his gaze toward the front of the apartment. Lori was in there.

But Margaret was right. Dammit. Jude slammed the steering wheel. He’d done that a lot lately. Soon his palms would be bruised. He couldn’t just charge into Lori’s life without a plan. He needed to think. Get his shit together. Figure out what he was going to say. If she’d been with Margaret for a year, then she was going to be hurting. Stepping into her world today would be cruel.

He started the engine and pulled away from the curb. He needed to think and he needed to do it with a clear head. No more drinking himself to sleep at night to visions of Lori sucking him off at his feet.

He’d been crazy to come back here. But he was here now, and Lori was under his skin. He had no idea what he’d hoped to accomplish coming back to town. He’d learned some details, though, that might be influencing him. She wasn’t married. She wasn’t with another Dom. She wasn’t even with a man. He knew she’d experimented with women in the past, before his time, but he hadn’t expected to find her living with one. And he certainly hadn’t entertained the idea of her being a Domme.

If he were perfectly honest, the idea was hot. She’d looked good enough to eat prancing around the club the other night in those fuck-me boots that reached up her thighs. The fucking skirt and bustier had covered too much of her fantastic body for his taste, but it had been appropriate attire for a woman in charge.

She’d filled out some. She wasn’t as skinny as she’d been two years ago. He liked it. Her submissive wasn’t hard on the eyes either. The woman was taller and leaner, but she was drop-dead gorgeous. Not like Lori, more like a movie star.

But he wasn’t interested in Margaret. Even though she was stunning and attractive, she wasn’t his type. He needed to wrap his mind around everything before he acted rashly.

He headed straight back to his hotel and flopped onto the double bed that was too small for his frame. It bounced as he landed. He stared at the ceiling, a smile tempting his lips for the first time in so long he couldn’t remember.

Chapter Five

Lori put the last of the dishes away and leaned against the counter to stare out the kitchen window. It was Friday night. One week ago today she’d been faced with the stunning revelation that Jude Cavanaugh was back in town. Where had he been all week after torturing her last Friday?

She figured he’d met with Jason by then. She hadn’t asked, but the two had been best friends at one time. There was little doubt they’d exchanged words at some point this week. Lori was afraid to find out.

She hadn’t spoken to Margaret all week. And to be honest, she’d spent more time dreaming about Jude, both awake and asleep, than the sub she’d lived with for over a year. Guilt made her curse under her breath. She nearly always went to Emergence on a Friday night, but there was no way she could do so this week. She couldn’t darken the doors of that club right now.

She didn’t know if she was avoiding Margaret or Jude, but either prospect made her feel the tightening stress in her chest. She didn’t know what to say to Margaret yet. She’d asked for some time. And Margaret had given it to her. Lori knew Margaret had returned at some point during the week and taken more of her belongings. Her side of the closet was almost empty.

Lori swallowed back the knowledge that if she truly loved Margaret like she deserved, Lori would fight for her. Instead she pined over the memories of a long-lost relationship she had no idea would ever be hers again to enjoy. She never should have let that bastard get under her skin. Lori stomped around the room. She was wrung out. Luckily her classes had been light this week or she’d have had a meltdown.

The doorbell rang, freezing Lori in her tracks. She took a deep breath, her heart racing, before she shook her head and regained some sense. Probably Jason. She hadn’t spoken to him and he was surely tired of her silence.

Expecting to roll her eyes at the only real family she had, she whipped the door open—and froze.

He wasn’t facing her at first. He’d turned around to wait for someone to come to the door. But his ass was enough to make her weak in the knees, and his jeans pulled tight around his firm cheeks because he had his hands in his pockets.

When he turned, his look was one of remorse. “May I come in?”

As though she were a puppet, Lori stood back and nodded. Why the fuck was she letting him in?

Her hands shook and she fisted them at her sides as he shut the door behind him. He turned the deadbolt, because he was that controlling. Immediately she felt his gaze penetrating her from above. Why did the man have to be so tall on top of everything else?

Jude stepped farther into the living space and wandered around, absorbing everything Lori owned. She felt open, almost violated. This was her space, dammit. Her apartment. Nothing in it was his. She’d taken nothing from the house when she’d sold it. Not even photographs of the two of them together.

He would find nothing to remind him of the past.

This apartment belonged to Lori, and Margaret. They’d forged their way together.

“How did you two meet?” He fingered the edges of a painting on the wall, one Lori and Margaret had purchased together over the summer on vacation at the beach. They’d bought it from a street vendor. It held sweet memories.

Lori jerked her gaze from the painting to the man in front of it as he turned toward her and lifted an eyebrow. He’d asked her a question. He’d never been a patient man.

She knew who he was talking about. “At the club.”

“Emergence?”

“Yes.” Lori tried hard not to fidget. She’d been completely in control for so long it felt odd to be out of sorts again. He did this to her just by being in the room.

She squeezed her legs together in an attempt to keep the pulsing need that emerged in her pussy at bay. Thirty seconds and he had her befuddled.

And he looked fucking sexier than ever with his head shaved close and his two-day-old beard. How did he manage to look like that all the time? Except for the blue smudges under his eyes that made him look ten years older, he was
GQ
sexy.

“Sit.” He pointed at the couch.

When she didn’t move quick enough, he nodded at the couch, one eyebrow raised as though he didn’t appreciate having to repeat himself.

Lori shuffled around to the couch, keeping her gaze locked on Jude. Goddamn him.

Somehow she managed to make it to her designated spot and grasped her thighs with her hands. She struggled not to bite her lower lip. He loved it when she did that. He punished her for it, but he loved punishing her. She wouldn’t give him the satisfaction.

She did squeeze her knees together, though. That would get his goat.

Jude wandered, examining everything in sight. With his back to her, he made her wait.

“What are you doing here, Jude?” Lori asked, emboldened by the knowledge that he didn’t own her anymore.

“I moved back.” He strolled behind her.

“I see that. Are you here to stay?”

“Depends.”

On me
.

“I’d like to.” He leaned over the back of the couch and twirled a length of Lori’s hair in one hand. “Your hair is longer.” He dropped the lock. “What made you try topping?” he asked as he ran a finger down Lori’s neck.

She shivered. “It just kind of happened.”
And it’s none of your business
.

“Have you been with anyone else?”

God, he was bold. That bastard. She knew what he meant. The unspoken “since I left” hung in the air. “It’s not really any of your business.” There, she said it. “Where have you been?”

Ignoring her question, he leaned in closer to her ear. She could feel his warm breath on her skin. “Lori.” He spoke the single word with authority. She wanted to slap him. She also wanted him to fuck her.

“Sir?” God, why had she said that? The word came out from habit.

“Have. You. Been. With. Anyone. Else?”

She shook her head and lowered her gaze. “Not exactly, Sir. I tried, but—”

He stood and wandered in front of her again.

Dammit. He was assessing her. She loathed him at that moment. And she wished to hell that emotion overrode her other feelings toward him. The reality was, dead or alive, he owned her. He would for the rest of her life. Their souls were entwined. It wasn’t a bond she could break even if she never saw him again. No one would ever meet the standards he met in her eyes.

“What do you mean, you tried?”

She swallowed. “I worked with several Doms at the club.”
None of them were you
.

“I see.”

Did he?

Lori squirmed. She felt uneasy about letting Jude top her so easily. It had unsettled her last week and that feeling hadn’t eased.

“So let me see if I’m reading this situation correctly.” Jude sat on the coffee table, his knees inches from Lori’s. “You’ve been dabbling as a Domme in my absence because you couldn’t find a man who could make you feel the way I do.” He narrowed his gaze at her, but his statement wasn’t meant to mock her. His expression was serious. His brow furrowed. He was truly assessing her position.

Lori’s entire body shook. “I’ve been a Domme for over a year, Jude.”

“That may be, and I think it’s fabulous you’ve experimented with other aspects of the lifestyle. But you aren’t
now
, are you?” He leaned into her space to catch her gaze. “Your body language speaks for itself.”

After a few moments he continued, “Have you enjoyed being with a woman?”

“Yes.” She couldn’t lie to him. It wasn’t in her.

“She’s very attractive, baby. You have excellent taste in women.”

Lori said nothing. She lifted her gaze, her eyes taking him in.

“You’ve forgotten most of my rules.” He stood. He towered over her when he did that. “Or simply chosen to tempt me.”

Both
. She was well aware she was challenging him. And he was coming through. If he called her to task, he still had it in him.

Jude stepped away, and Lori regretted his absence. She wished he had touched her, held her face.

“I like it,” he declared.

What?

“But I’m not going to tolerate it, as tempting as it is. If you come home with me, you can leave your new attitude at the door.” He paused.

Lori’s entire body shook as though she had a fever. She pulled her hands together and fisted both palms in her lap. She dropped her gaze. She couldn’t decide if she was about to blow steam out of her head at his high-handed proposal or kneel at his feet and thank him.

“I want you back, Lori. I’m not going to deny that. It would be ludicrous. I won’t deny I feel awful about breaking up your relationship. That would be insensitive.”

Yep, she was going to hit him if she moved an inch. Insensitive? Like leaving her with no warning and no explanation and popping up two years later demanding he take over where they left off? That kind of insensitive?

“Don’t say anything right now. I’ll give you some time to think it over. How about a week? That should give you time to examine the idea and decide if you’re in. I just rented a house this week. I need a few days to move in. I’ll come back here at the same time next Friday and we’ll discuss your decision.”

Lori swallowed. She didn’t move. She couldn’t believe what he’d suggested. Proposed. Fucking demanded. He hadn’t worded anything as a question. He’d simply stated he wanted her back. On his terms. She knew those well.

“Okay then. I’ll see you next week. Same time. Same place.” He stepped over to the door and paused without turning around. “One more thing. Don’t fuck anyone this week. No orgasms either. Ponder. But no sex.” And he left. Walked right out the door, shutting it behind him.

Lori flinched, nearly jumping out of her skin at the finality of that door shutting. The noise resounded in the apartment like an echo, over and over.
He never did answer my question. Where the fuck has he been?

Minutes went by before Lori pulled herself up and dragged her body to the bedroom. She felt like she was stuck in quicksand. She went straight through to the master bath and turned on the tub. After sitting so stiff and tight for so long, she needed the relaxation of a hot bath.

She peeled off her clothes and reached in to touch the water to make sure it was warm enough.

She cringed at the demand placed on her not to orgasm, but she stuffed it into the back of her mind. It didn’t matter anyway. She hadn’t had sex for the past week as it was, not even with herself.

He needn’t have requested that of her. There was little chance Lori would be able to Domme for Margaret this week. And not a chance in hell she could allow another Dom to command her. She was wrung out from the crazy tornado that had blown through town, lifted the homes, and not yet set anything back down.

The water felt wonderful as she slid into the steaming tub, but how long would it take for her muscles to relax enough that she could stop shaking?