Authors: Jaime Maddox
How right the entire night felt, from the moment she’d arrived at Sal’s house. She’d enjoyed their company, and landed a new job. Now she was walking on the beach with a beautiful woman, under a sky full of stars and a big bright moon. That woman was amazing—tall, intelligent, funny, with an interest in sports and summers off to travel and play golf. Alex was perfect.
“So, do you come here often?” Brit asked, breaking the silence and steering her thoughts from a place she feared they were heading too quickly.
“Surprisingly, no.”
“Really?” To Britain, walking on the beach was the best part of a beach vacation, especially in the evening, on nights like this, following a path laid out in the heavens. Of course, she was usually alone.
“Yeah. I guess when you’re here all the time you just take it for granted.”
“So you don’t go to the beach at all?”
“Oh, no, of course I do. Every day. I was just talking about the moonlight walk. That, I never do.”
Brit felt a sudden heat at Alex’s confession. “I’m glad you’ve made the exception for me.”
The bright moon lit their path, and Brit could discern the magnificent features of Alex’s face. She snuck a glance her way and caught Alex looking back.
Alex quickly looked down and spoke. “Me, too.”
They were quiet for a moment before Alex spoke again. “So, tell me why you decided to become a teacher.”
“Hmm. I think the answer keeps changing. I used to think it’s because teaching is important. America is way behind other countries in science and math, and that’s going to cause problems for us all one day. We can’t follow the rest of the world and still be a leader.”
“Is it just science and math?” Alex asked. “Should we learn literature and music, too? Do we need to be leaders in those fields?”
“We should try to excel in every way we can. Each of us has different gifts and strengths, and we should all find ours and use them.”
“If it were so easy,” Alex said softly.
“Yeah, I hear you. But we can do this, Alex. We’re so much better off than so many other people. We just don’t realize it. We focus on what we don’t have and what we want and forget our blessings. I did a service trip to Brazil this summer. We went to this small village and built a town hall with a classroom. They just wanted their children to learn basic math so they can count the money they make from their crops and not be cheated. They live in little huts and have no shoes, and they’re happy anyway. Probably the happiest people I’ve ever known.”
Alex was silent for a moment. “Were you tempted to stay?”
“Not at all!” Brit confessed her need for creature comforts, and Alex agreed with her.
“I try to live my life very simply, but I’d have a hard time without electricity and running water.”
Brit laughed. “It was an eye-opening experience, that’s for sure. But a good one. I feel more grounded now. Like I have my priorities in order.”
“That’s great. I try to live each day, not getting caught up in the worries and the what-ifs and money and prestige. I infuriate my parents.”
“What do they do?”
“They’re capitalists. They own car washes and Laundromats and dry-cleaning stores, and they’re filthy rich. How about you?”
“My dad’s a doctor. Cardiology. My mom was once a nurse, but she retired when she was thirty to focus on her career as a devoted wife and mother.” There was no way she could keep the sarcasm from her voice.
“How’d she do?”
Apparently, Alex didn’t notice the sarcasm, and Brit let it drop. Even though her mom tended to be tough, Brit loved her, and she had to admit she was a good mother. Mostly. “Fine, I guess. None of us are in jail.”
“Hey, you two,” Tam called from behind them, “if we don’t turn around soon, we’ll have to call a cab to get back.”
Brit had been caught up in their conversation, watching the starry sky and the moonlit waves, with an occasional stolen glance at the woman beside her, so she was surprised when she looked back to see the lights of the boardwalk so far in the distance. They were on a quiet stretch of beach, the only light coming from the decks and windows of the houses a hundred yards back from the ocean, and of course that big, bright moon.
Alex looked up at the sky and then to her friends. “Let’s sit for a while,” she suggested. She wanted to go anywhere but back. This night had been so perfect she never wanted it to end.
They huddled a little more closely as they sat on the sand, but Alex kept a respectable distance from Brit, while her friends sat a few feet away. The sand was cool compared to the night air, but not uncomfortably so. Alex sat with her legs crossed, and Brit sat on her butt, knees bent and pulled up close, and long arms wrapped around them. She rested her head on her knees, and when Alex turned to her, their eyes were nearly level.
“This is nice,” Brit said.
“It is.” Alex smiled, feeling something unfamiliar and exciting and delightful. She liked Brit. In fact, she couldn’t remember the last time she’d enjoyed another woman’s company as much as she had this night.
She turned her gaze back to the ocean, forcing herself not to stare at Brit. Her long hair fell across her shoulders, glistening in the moonlight. Those same moonbeams kissed her nose and her cheeks and her lips. Perfect, inviting, they called to her. She’d never wanted to kiss someone so badly, yet she knew she shouldn’t. She turned her focus to her friends.
“Can I lean on you?” Tam asked Kim.
“Sure,” Kim replied, and Tam rested her back against Kim’s chest and shoulder.
“Why don’t we do this every night?” Tam asked.
“We should,” Alex said softly.
Kim chimed in. “No argument from me.”
“I do this every night,” Brit told them. “Except there’s no ocean. Just my deck and some trees and a clear, bright sky full of stars.”
“We don’t have stars in Philly,” Kim informed her.
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen this many,” Tam said.
They were quiet again, and Alex’s every sense was heightened as Brit reached her hand across the foot of space separating them. With a feather-like stroke, she touched her arm and whispered, “Thank you for inviting me to come with you tonight.”
“You’re welcome.” Alex didn’t even twitch, lest her action prompt Brit to move her fingers from her arm. Brit’s touch was electrifying, but Kim’s voice broke the spell.
“Tam, I need you to move,” Kim said. “My arm’s falling asleep.”
“What? I thought you were strong.”
“I am. You’re just…”
“What? What? Were you going to say I’m fat?”
Alex stared, disbelieving, as the scene unfolded before her. With the fluid motion of a seasoned wrestler, Tam pushed Kim onto her back on the sand and twisted her own body to a position atop her. Kim didn’t fight. Alex saw their eyes lock, and they stared at each other in the moonlight, seeming to forget the company that shared this section of beach. Then their lips met in a tender kiss.
It was an unexpected turn of events, not at all unpleasant, but Brit momentarily forgot her manners as she stared for a moment. Then she turned away, once again seeking the comfort of the ocean.
Alex’s voice barely registered. “It’s about time,” she said.
Brit heard Alex move beside her and looked to find Alex’s outstretched hand beckoning her. “Let’s go, Brit. We’ll give these two a bit of privacy.”
Britain accepted the proffered hand and grabbed her sandals. She was effortlessly pulled to her feet, delighted that for a few seconds Alex didn’t release her hand. But then she did, and they began to walk back toward civilization.
The steady rhythm of their tandem steps was comforting. It had been a whirlwind of an evening, and Brit was still spinning. She’d reconnected with Sally. She’d gotten a job as a basketball coach. She was walking on the beach with the most attractive woman she’d ever met, who just happened to surround herself with lesbians.
“Sorry about that,” Alex said after a few minutes.
Brit was genuinely surprised. She was anything but sorry about the way her evening had unfolded. “About what?”
“About the PDA.”
Brit laughed and searched her mind for an appropriate rejoinder, something that would ease Alex’s concerns and perhaps indicate that her own desires ran in a similar vein. Amazingly, after just one evening, Brit felt comfortable enough with Alex to reveal something people she’d known her whole life didn’t know. “It’s not quite as exciting as kissing a girl yourself, but watching two girls kiss isn’t bad.”
Alex threw her head back in laughter and made her own confession. “I wholeheartedly agree.”
“What just happened?” Brit asked after a moment.
Alex explained.
“You mean they’re not a couple?” Brit asked when she heard the story.
“Well,” Alex said as she shrugged. “By now they might be.”
“I wouldn’t have guessed. They seem so sure of each other, so in love.”
“Well, there you go. You’ve known them for an hour and you see it. I see it. Everyone but those two has known it all along.”
Alex stopped walking, and talking, too. They’d reached the boardwalk, and it suddenly occurred to her that they had no plan, no destination in mind. It was after midnight yet she didn’t feel a bit tired. In fact, the opposite was true. The new friendship forming between them had energized her, and she could have gone on talking to Brit all night. She didn’t want their time together to end.
Taking the lead, Alex turned to Britain and raised an eyebrow. “Where to, Coach Dodge?” she asked softly, inviting Britain to dictate the night’s direction.
Laughing at her new title, Brit bent to put her shoes back on, but before she could respond, a hand grabbed Alex’s forearm and spun her around. Anke stood before them with a snarl on her face and fire in her eyes. Alex was stunned.
“You kick me out of your bed zis morning, and already you have somevon new zis night?”
Brit stared at Anke and stepped back.
“What are you doing here, Anke?” Alex couldn’t disguise the surprise in her voice. “I thought you were leaving!”
“Obviously!” she hissed. “How long has zis bin goink on?” she demanded, nodding in Britain’s direction.
“Anke, nothing’s going on!” Alex said.
Brit looked scared as she started backing away. Alex wanted to tell her to stop, to wait, but before she could say anything, Anke began screaming.
“You are a whore!” Anke shouted as she raised her hand and tried to slap Alex. Only Alex’s quick reflexes allowed her to block the blow. She held on to the arm that had tried to strike her, and Anke began wrestling to free it.
“Let me go! You’re hurtink me!”
Stunned, Alex released her grip but stepped back, out of Anke’s reach, and Anke abruptly turned and began marching down the boardwalk. “Anke, wait! Wait! Let me explain!” she shouted at her back.
Totally off balance, Alex turned to Brit, who’d already distanced herself by a few feet. “I’m so sorry, Brit. I have to go talk to her. I’ll see you at school.” Without waiting for Britain’s reply, Alex turned and began running after Anke. She didn’t owe Anke anything, not even an explanation, but she felt she needed to give her one anyway. Even though they’d agreed they could date other people, it was important for Alex to let her know she hadn’t.
Wearing loafers, it didn’t take Alex long to catch Anke, who was wearing slip-on backless sandals. Beside her, she slowed her stride and raised her arm to Anke’s shoulder. Anke shrugged it off and kept walking. Alex tried again. “Anke, she’s my new assistant coach! I just met her tonight!”
Anke stopped and turned to face Alex. “You jus meet her? She’s your assistan and you take her for moonlight walk on the beach? You zink I’m stupit?”
“Yes! No!” Alex stammered. Flustered, she ran a hand through her hair. She felt like a rug had been pulled out from beneath her and she was lying stunned on the hard floor, looking up in confusion.
Although what she told Anke about Britain was true, Alex somehow felt she was lying. It seemed as if she’d always known Brit and felt like she always wanted to. When she was walking with Brit on the beach, Alex wasn’t sure where their night was heading—and she didn’t care, as long as Britain continued to talk to her, and laugh with her, and make her feel lighter than air. But, now Britain was gone and probably thought her a total ass. A whore, as Anke had so eloquently described her.
Alex was left alone and disoriented, forced to deal with an irate former lover whom she had no desire to talk to. She sighed in frustration.
Seeming to sense Alex’s emotions, Anke softened her posture and her tone. Motioning to a bench on the boardwalk looking out at the Atlantic, Anke sighed as well. “You vant to go sit and talk?”
Alex nodded, but before she moved she glanced down the boardwalk to where Britain had stood just a minute before. Of course, she was gone. Resigned, Alex walked beside Miss Bavaria, the envy of every unattached lesbian in the world, feeling anything but enviable.
*
Standing on her deck, Britain studied the moonlight reflecting off the white tips of the waves that crashed on the shore before her. The moon was still bright, but the sandy beach no longer beckoned her. She was close enough to hear the sounds of the ocean, yet so very far away that she heard nothing at all.
The roads were virtually deserted at this late hour, and it had taken her less than forty minutes to find her car and navigate it back to Bethany Beach. Yet she felt like years had passed since that moment on the boardwalk when Anke had appeared. It surely had been a lifetime ago that she began pedaling her bike into the sunrise and met Sal on Penny Lane. Too much had happened in that span for it to have only been one single day.
Britain’s head was spinning. Spending the evening with those women, dining together and sharing stories, she’d felt more comfortable than she’d ever felt in her life. More than with her closest friends, from whom she’d been hiding her sexuality. Certainly more so than with her family.
Alex had seemed to be not only an ally who would help show her the ropes at school, but perhaps also a friend. Perhaps much more than that. Brit had felt an attraction to Alex she’d never felt before, and she knew Alex had felt something, too. Alex had been flirting with her from the first, and Brit had flirted right back. It had been wonderful.