Read Blackbird Knitting in a Bunny's Lair Online
Authors: Amy Lane
“Nice,” Jeremy said, startling him. “Like gentle, sometimes, you know?”
Aiden’s breath caught. Gentle. He’d needed gentle and Aiden had given him fierce. And Jeremy, being Jeremy, wouldn’t have complained, not even a little. Aiden kissed the nape of his neck and vowed to give Jeremy something gentle.
The old house creaked and groaned, and Aiden listened to it, wondering how it sounded to Jeremy. Aiden had lived here for the past week, getting it ready for Jeremy to come home, but for Jeremy, it had to be brand-new. And he’d needed gentle, and once again Aiden had failed.
Gentle.
He nuzzled the back of Jeremy’s neck again and looked out of the window, which, behind the curtain, showed the expanse of meadow that made up the backyard of the house. It was all under snow now, and the contrast of white snow and black night was hard to see given the softer, more purple shadows that blanketed Jeremy’s soft breathing.
The words and the song came to him, unbidden.
“Blackbird singing in the dead of night….”
N
ORMALCY
.
Normalcy, Jeremy thought, was one of those things that happened in increments, tiny measures, like a kitten’s heartbeat.
He woke up that first day in the new house so confused he actually whimpered, burying backward into Aiden’s heat by instinct.
Aiden’s breath feathered his temple. “Jer, look. You can see out the window. Snow fell last night, and you can see the shadows from the mountains on the front lawn.”
Jeremy stilled his racing heart and did what Aiden said. There were lacy curtains on the second-story windows, remnants, he was sure, of Ben’s grandmother, who had lived here first. But they had been washed and were almost as white as the coating of snow on the lawn. Somehow they made the knife-edge of sun and shadow as it cleaved the white blanket on their lawn look brighter, more optimistic, than Jeremy had expected.
“’S pretty,” he admitted. Aiden nuzzled his neck, and Jeremy felt the tension seep out of him. “What’re we doin’ today?”
“Depends,” Aiden told him. “You could stay in the house, figure out where you want your stuff, or you could come to work and man the store. You do that and when Ben gets back, he can come work the mill with me, Craw, and Rich, and we can get rid of some of our backlog.” He paused for a moment, and just as Jeremy was going to ask who Rich was, he added, “And Rich can go the fuck home.”
“Where’s he from?”
“He’s one of the people the Marshals Service sent us to help. It was a nice idea from Johnny, and it’s not like he’s not a hard worker, but honestly, what an asshole.”
In November, Jeremy might have said “Takes one to know one,” but not right now. “Everyone has one. What’s this guy do that makes his special?”
Aiden grunted. “Insists on breaks, for one thing. Not that I don’t mind a break, right? But you know the machines—they got cycles. It’s easier to power down after a cycle, but this guy’s all ‘I been here two hours, can I at least take a leak?’ and you know? No. Can’t take a fuckin’ leak when the blower’s halfway through its cycle, dumbass. And you know what else?”
“No.” Jeremy was fascinated, actually. In the hospital it had all been breathless anticipation of Jeremy’s every need. Aiden hadn’t even mentioned daily irritating things like the new millworker. Jeremy wanted to know more.
“I think he’s a homophobic asshole, that’s what I think. He was all peachy keen fuckin’ fine with Craw until he realized Ben was sleeping over there. He turned to me and said, ‘You never know about some people,’ and I said, ‘You’re taking my boyfriend’s job,’ and really? He hasn’t had much to say to either of us in the last month.”
Jeremy chuckled, thinking about it. “Four of us’re pretty butch—he got off lucky.”
“I’m fuckin’
sayin’
!” Aiden growled. “Jesus, it’s like he got assigned to us so he didn’t have to come within a mile of Stanley, right? Because
Stanley
would have had this guy’s alarms ringing ’til his head popped off. Anyway, so, you go into the shop, look at the books a little, ’cause I think you’d be as good with ’em as Ben is, and Ben hasn’t had the time. Maybe work on the displays, because he still does
not
know wool, and you know how Ari likes to make things pretty. Ari also did most of the ordering, with Craw’s approval, so when you’re sitting down and resting, you could look through catalogs, see what sort of supplies you want to get.”
“Like….” Jeremy’s mind boggled. “Like, the needles and such? Like, could we get some of those
laminate
needles? The ones Stanley kept bringing for Miss Ariadne? Those were
sweet
, and they were color coordinated, which is neither here nor there, but they were
pretty
and they looked so good in the wool and—”
Aiden let out a chuckle behind him and kissed his ear some more.
“What?” he asked, almost afraid, almost forgetting who his boy was, thinking Aiden would make fun of him for his desire for pretty needles.
“God, Jer—I’m so glad to have you home.”
Jeremy smiled and looked out at that pretty, alien view. “Not as glad as I am to be here,” he said fervently. Carefully, because his shoulder was still healing and he was stiff from sleeping, he rolled over in Aiden’s arms. “I got morning breath,” he confessed shyly, and his boy, with his small, intense face and the forehead that had looked like Craw’s for two whole months, smiled like the sunshine on the lawn.
“Me too,” he said, and then they were kissing, and it wasn’t bad, and then it was great, and then it was sex in each other’s tightened fist.
Jeremy’s orgasm was a slow-cresting, mild thing, like a vast wave that didn’t crash so much as rush the shore deeply and then flow on and on and on while he buried his face in Aiden’s shoulder and shook.
“It’s official,” he breathed when he could. “You’re trying to kill me.”
And then he heard a short, suspicious hiccup of a sound. He looked up in time for Aiden to rip himself out of bed. “Shower,” he mumbled, keeping his face averted.
“Wait—Aiden—”
But Aiden was scurrying, shoulders curled forward, his spine curved, his posture as young as Jeremy had ever seen it. He got into the bathroom and threw all his stuff out the door as he undressed. True to form, it fell
around
the hamper, but Jeremy knew he’d come out and pick it up later.
What he didn’t know was what just happened.
They never had gotten into the habit of locking the bathroom. He walked in, shivering a little in the morning cold, and welcomed the steam.
The shower was a glass cubicle large enough to fit a shower bench, which Jeremy had to confess he’d made use of. Aiden was leaning against the far wall, his back toward the spray. His shoulders were shaking suspiciously, and Jeremy felt a moment’s impulse to leave him alone. A man needed his space, right? A man like Aiden, he didn’t need Jeremy in his face, telling him how to feel.
Aiden’s shoulders twitched, and he shivered. He turned around so his voice wasn’t muffled, and hollered, “Jer, would you shut the door! It’s getting cold in here.”
Jeremy turned and shut the door—behind him.
Then he took off his clothes, careful not to look at himself in the steamed mirror, and slid in behind Aiden. He didn’t say a word, just leaned his cheek on Aiden’s wet back and wrapped his arms around his waist.
“Glad to have you back, Jer,” Aiden said quietly, engulfing Jeremy’s clasped hands in his big, work-roughened ones.
“Glad to be here. Home.”
Jeremy’s head raised and lowered as Aiden breathed in and out.
“You are home,” Aiden said, sighing. “You believe that, right?”
“You said it last night, boy. You are my home.”
A shudder passed through him then, and Jeremy could do nothing but hold on until the shudders stopped.
The water ran cold, and Jeremy turned it off and got out. He grabbed a towel from the rack over the toilet and handed it back to Aiden before grabbing his own.
Aiden ran a slow hand over Jeremy’s pale flank. “Breakfast,” he said seriously, keeping his eyes averted. “Breakfast first. Then I’ll show you the critters so we can feed them.”
“Toast,” Jeremy said promptly—that was his favorite quick breakfast, and Aiden knew it.
“Eggs, sausage, and toast,” Aiden said, nodding decisively. “I’ll make it while you talk to the critters. They won’t feel like yours until you spend some time alone.”
T
HAT
BOY
was so right. They’d moved Ben’s sheep and his dog up to Craw’s house, so it was only the small animals left in the bunny hutch.
The hutch was small, room for two human adults feeding, checking water, making sure the heater was on and the critters were warm enough. The chickens dozed in their nests. Aiden told him that if they warmed their mash to eat, the chickens would continue to lay eggs through the winter, but he wasn’t sure what they’d do now, since everyone had been so busy. No time to warm mash for chickens—scarcely time to warm cereal for humans.
Aiden showed him where everything was, and then disappeared with a solid squeeze of his good shoulder.
Jeremy stood in the rabbit hutch and looked at Ben’s old bunnies, and some of Craw’s, and the two
gorgeous
Angora rabbits Stanley had sent him. He liked to talk to the bunnies; his voice would drop, and he’d make noises to them instead of real words, and somehow they just responded to the complete lack of evil intention in his voice. He stuck a finger into the Angora rabbit cage and stroked that heavenly soft fur. “You guys are a bit fluffy,” he said, letting them snuggle up to his hand. “We’re gonna have to shear you come spring but probably brush you now. And definitely clip your pooper or that’ll get right nasty. But seriously, you’re like furballs with faces, and I think even the faces are shaved. Dayum, guys—you’re awesome, but I’m gonna have to spend twenty minutes a day just with you!”
He thought about that while he picked up the brush Aiden had left for him in the corner of the hutch. Absently he ran the brush over their fur, loving the docile way they just rubbed their bodies against him. He stopped every so often and pulled the fur out of the brush to drop in the bag Aiden had left hanging from the corner of the hutch post.
“Fuzzy bunny sluts,” he murmured, and they made little lip and teeth noises in response. “Fuzzy bunny sluts, humping horny. Bet you’re already preggers, ya little tramp.”
“Pft pft pft pft pft.”
“Yeah, don’t you backtalk me. And you, stop humping my hand. I don’t put out on the first brush, ’kay? Yeah, go take that thing somewhere else. If you’d seen my man, you wouldn’t be that impressed with yourself.”
“Pft pft pft pft pft.”
And in the background, the semicomatose chickens were singing their own songs.
“You two, you’ll make some fucking amazing babies. You all brown and you all gray. Maybe they’ll be spotted or something like that. Think you could sorta squirt ’em out in specialty colors?”
“Pft pft pft pft pft.”
“Buaaaaaaachhh-bu-bu-buaaaaaach.”
And the rest of the bunnies, the ones who’d really loved Jeremy and whom Craw had moved in special for him, rubbed up against the wire mesh between the cages and begged for Jeremy’s attention like the whoring little bottoms they were.
“Yeah, I see you. Put your asses down, seriously. It’s shameless. Fuckin’ embarrassing. You don’t see the het bunnies acting like that, do you? No, the little lady here is being downright aloof.”
“Pft pft pft pft pft.”
“Buaaaaaaachhh-bu-bu-buaaaaaach.”
“Eep-pft-pft-eep.”
At the end were some really soft, squeaky little rodent things that sort of trilled when Jeremy reached in to handle them. Their cage was brand-new, and their fur felt like angel feathers and baby kisses, and Jeremy almost thought one of them would sit up and ask for a butler instead of a millworker, probably using a British accent. But no, they just trilled and let Jeremy continue his ritual of bonding, brushing, and feeding, and before venturing into the workforce after all that time in bed, Jeremy got a chance to pet one more thing.
“Pft pft pft pft pft.”
“Buaaaaaaachhh-bu-bu-buaaaaaach.”
“Eep-pft-pft-eep.”
“Prrrr-eee-trrrrr-eee-prrrrrrr-eeeeer.”
By the time Aiden stuck his head out the front door and called Jeremy’s name, he felt like he’d had a full-body massage by invisible fairies.
He let out a sigh that almost woke the mean-assed rooster Ben used to complain about.
“See you all tonight,” he said, trying to keep his excitement from startling all his new friends.
One thing at a time, he thought, walking carefully up the icy walk. Little things made home.
A
ND
BROTHER
,
didn’t the shop look good.
Aiden walked him in, giving him a quick peck on the cheek. “Ben brought in a satellite radio—you can program your station if you want.”
Jeremy opened his mouth and closed it again. “That’s right nice,” he said, blinking, and Ben looked up from a laptop computer and blinked back. “I got no idea what I’d listen to,” he confessed to those sleepy blue eyes.
“Hobbit music,” Ben said without missing a beat. “Seriously—soundtracks for fantasy movies. No words, but it keeps me awake. Weird.”
Jeremy nodded, and Aiden squeezed his waist and then moved out toward the door.
“I’ll be right out with you!” Ben called as Aiden disappeared.
Jeremy watched him go and then let out a deep breath and moved in to look at what Ben was doing on the big glowing box.
“Look,” he said quietly, coming to Ben’s side. He was going to have to spill something that had been niggling in the back of his head since Aiden had told him what he’d be doing. “Aiden thinks I can do good with figures, and I’m okay at it. Not a genius like you’d expect a grifter to be, but competent. But I got no idea how to work a spreadsheet or anything like that. If you want my help here, I gotta do it on paper, or maybe you can send Aiden a tutorial on his computer and I can practice, because, see, I want to help, but—”