Big Easy Temptation (25 page)

Her jaw tightened and she held up her hands in obvious capitulation. “All right. Check
into their backgrounds. Please do it quietly. I have to work there after you’re gone.
Those people are the only friends I have left. And if you’re also going to look into
the NOLA PD, dear god, don’t let anyone know. They get touchy.”

He would look into her uncle, but he was also interested in her boyfriend. Detective
Chad Michaels was her uncle’s right-hand man, looking to move up in the ranks from
what Dax had heard. It was shockingly easy to find information on the man, but something
about his astringently clean record made Dax suspicious.

Everyone was a little dirty. Not criminally so, but there wasn’t a person he knew
who didn’t have some breath of scandal in their past . . . except Detective Chad.

“I’ll be very discreet.”

“Sure you will.” She crossed her arms over her chest. “Don’t think because you’ve
put me in a corner professionally that you can get anything personal out of this,
Spencer.”

What he wouldn’t give to hear her call him Dax again. “I wouldn’t dream of it, Holland.”

“All right. In the morning, we need to come up with a plan of action. I think we should
go back out to the prison, but this time we don’t call ahead. I don’t think we should
give anyone time to plan for our visit. Do you have all the video we need? It should
be easy enough to get. I can requisition the original if you like.”

He shook his head. “I’ve got everything we need.”

She was still for a moment. “You really think they’re after Zack.”

He nodded. “I can feel it in my gut. This is bigger than we ever dreamed and we’ve
already lost so much. Zack’s mom. My dad. Joy. Mad. We can’t let them take anyone
else in our family.”

“What does the Russian mob want from him?”

That was the billion-dollar question. “It could be anything, but I suspect this all
revolves around money and power. Nefarious shit usually does. We’re wondering if Zack’s
father made some deal with the
Bratva
when he was stationed in Moscow and they’re now coming to collect. Roman is making
a list of all the major contracts coming up, but Zack doesn’t approve those.”

Holland frowned. “Why would they have waited so long to make their move?”

Again, he had no idea. “It’s possible Frank Hayes promised the Russians something
when Zack became president, so they’ve bided their time. But the old man has dementia
now, so if they’re waiting for him to strong-arm Zack into something, they’re doomed
to disappointment. He mostly shuffles around the residence and hums a lot. Sometimes
he thinks it’s the sixties again. Zack tried finding a memory care facility for him,
but he got so violent the press reported on it. He’s calm when he knows Zack’s close
by. Hopefully, if we figure out why they killed my father, we’ll figure out what they
want and we’ll stop them. My father must have known something. That’s why they silenced
him. I need to find his old aide-de-camp, Peter Morgan. He’s the key.”

“And naturally he’s off the grid and his whereabouts are unknown.”

“We’ll find him. His family was from New Orleans. I’ll stay up for a bit and do a
little research. You should get some sleep,” Dax murmured, wishing he could take her
in his arms.

It had been a rough day for her. When she’d opened the door earlier, the sight of
her tears had kicked him in the gut. Holland was always strong, and the idea that
seeing him again had undone her, even temporarily, made him feel about two feet tall.

“Fine.” She turned and started to walk away. When she reached the hall to her bedroom,
she stopped, her spine ramrod straight, head held high. She didn’t face him. “Did
you ever love her?”

His heart clenched for a second. Easiest answer he’d given her all day. “No.”

“That makes it worse, Dax.” She walked away and closed the door quietly.

His heart sank. He’d lashed out and made that stupid-ass mistake when he’d been angry
and in pain. It had affected them deeply, but then
they’d both screwed up. She should have trusted him with the truth. She had to have
known he’d never put his mother and sister in danger. That he’d move heaven and earth
to keep Holland safe.

Still, someone had to give in, and his mistake had been far worse. He’d make the first
gesture. Maybe he could finally win her once and for all. This was his first night
back in her life and he was already sleeping on her couch. He remembered where that
had led the last time.

And she’d called him Dax.

He sat down in front of his computer and started his search, more hopeful than he’d
been in years.

*   *   *

H
olland pressed the button on the coffeemaker and sighed as she looked around her kitchen.
Her houseguest was far too used to a maid apparently. Or having a whole boat of underlings
eager to curry favor and clean up after the boss. She knew he’d been on leave for
a while, and it seemed to have played hell with his normal cleanliness.

The half-empty pizza box still sat out on the bar. The wine bottle was corked but
his whiskey sat open, tempting her. The only thing he’d cleaned up was the couch.
She saw no sign that he’d slept there at all. She’d glanced into the hall closet and
noted he’d neatly folded and stacked his sheets, along with the crappiest blanket
and pillow she owned. This morning she felt vaguely guilty for what must have been
an uncomfortable night.

Around her, the scene looked as if she’d enjoyed a nice date the night before. Or
a work-related evening. It certainly hadn’t been a date. Papers and pictures from
the case files littered her dining room table. His laptop still sat there and she
wondered how late he’d stayed up.

She tried not to think about the fact that she’d slept well for once. And dreamed
about him. It wasn’t like she didn’t do that often. It was simply that this time the
dream hadn’t morphed into something terrible. This time, he’d held her and made love
to her and begged her
forgiveness. His hands had moved over her body, offering repentance with every hungry
stroke.

Nope. She wasn’t going to think about that.

She poured herself a cup of coffee and wondered how long he’d been in the shower.
She could hear it running in the guest bathroom. He was in the bathroom—naked. Had
his body changed? His heart? What had happened during the years they’d spent apart?
She’d studied him the night before and beyond the change in his hair length, she’d
seen a few small lines around his eyes that betrayed the three years that had passed.

She caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror on the wall of her living room. What
did Dax see? Had she changed in the three years since she’d pushed him away? She saw
a woman dressed in pajama bottoms and a T-shirt that covered her properly. No more
sexy things for Holland. She’d thrown them all out.

She’d also thrown out so much of her sexuality the minute she’d lost Dax. Was that
why it hadn’t worked with any other man? Had she been part of the problem because
she lacked some sensual quality? Or was she a sad sack who had given her heart once
and her body had followed?

When Dax touched her the night before, her skin had come alive again. She hadn’t felt
as if she’d truly been living for three long years.

The shower turned off and she could picture him stepping out, his body glistening
with moisture. Once, she’d loved to shower with him. Silly thing. She’d been with
the man for such a short time and yet they’d made their own rituals, which she missed
to this day. She used to hop in the shower to get ready for work and Dax would inevitably
follow. Often they stayed there entwined until the water went cold.

How could she miss something she’d never really had? She’d dated Chad for so much
longer. Yet with the exception of the humiliating Internet video, she couldn’t single
out a memorable moment they’d shared. Being alone again had been a guilty relief.

Despite the fourteen months she’d spent with Chad, they’d never gotten around to moving
in together. Never even talked about it. Dax had practically moved in the night he’d
returned to her.

She had to wonder if he wasn’t re-creating the damn scenario. He’d fallen asleep that
first night on her couch and the night before he’d positioned himself right back there
again.

How long would she really be able to hold out when she already wanted him so badly?

She heard a knock on her door. Muttering a little curse, she swore once again she
would change the downstairs code. This time she looked through the peephole, anticipating
that Gemma or someone else from work had come to ask why the holy hell she was now
on a presidential task force of two.

Nope. It was so much worse.

With a long sigh, she opened the door. “Hello, Chad.”

Chad Michaels stood in her doorway, his suit pressed to perfection. Somehow he managed
to look neat even in the heat of a New Orleans morning. Her hair was already curling,
but his blond perfection was ruthlessly gelled back in a sleek do. “Holland. I’ve
heard some very distressing rumors and I wanted to stop by to check in on you.”

He stepped into her apartment without an invitation.

“This is really not a good time.” She wasn’t sure how the hell she was going to explain
the man in the bathroom. Unfortunately, unlike Chad, Dax’s grooming routine didn’t
take an hour. Dax pretty much showered and brushed his teeth and called it good. Chad
could spend hours on his man moisturizer and plucking invisible hairs from his brows.

Why had she slept with him?

He smiled down at her and she could smell his powerful cologne. “You didn’t change
the code to the stairway. Someone’s having second thoughts, I think.”

“Yes, I am definitely having second thoughts about changing the code.” She would do
it the minute she got rid of him.

He chuckled. “I pushed you too hard. It was too fast. Everyone knows I go after what
I want. That works for me most of the time. I didn’t mean to upset you. I think we
should talk. We both said a few things we didn’t mean last week.”

She couldn’t think of a single thing she hadn’t meant. “I only said no. I meant that,
Chad. Look, I’m so sorry I turned you down in such a public manner. I would never
have willingly humiliated you. But you didn’t exactly consult me beforehand. I never
gave you any indication that I wanted to marry you.”

She’d been floored, utterly caught off guard that he’d been even thinking about a
long-term future. Holland had barely considered where they would go for their next
date night.

“You’re not ready to get married,” he allowed. “I talked to Dr. Jansen about my feelings
and I really worked some things out. It took a while. I’ve been in session every day
since you turned me down. It’s cost me a lot, but it’s brought me here. Holland, I
forgive you.”

“That’s awesome.” The dude spent entirely too much time with his overpriced therapist.
How did Chad even afford him? “But I think we should end things here, on a positive
note. Forgiveness is good. It’s time for both of us to move on. Thanks for stopping
by.”

Any minute, Dax would step out and this would blow up in her face if she couldn’t
convince Chad to go.

Despite the fact that she’d opened the door, Chad didn’t move an inch. “According
to Dr. Jansen, your fear of intimacy and your inability to commit stem from your childhood
experiences. I understand that now. Let’s start over. I’ve made an appointment with
Dr. Jansen for you this afternoon. Even your uncle agrees that you should see someone.”

She felt her jaw drop and slammed the door. “You talked to my uncle about this?”

He watched her with a sickening sympathy on his face. “Your uncle understands that
I’m good for you. Your refusal last week was part of a need to play out your own mother’s
unhappiness. It was an irrational decision and one you should explore in therapy.
I think once you
acknowledge that you’re allowing your past to hamstring you, we can get back on track.”

“Let me tell you something, buddy. If I wanted to play out my mother’s unhappiness,
I would find the nearest superhot, emotionally unavailable Naval officer and go to
town.” Yes, now she was remembering all the reasons she and Chad weren’t compatible.
He could be a sanctimonious douche nozzle.

“I understand your reluctance.” He frowned as he paced deeper into her apartment and
glanced at the bar. “Really? Wine and hard liquor? Have you been doing this all week?
And pizza? You know what carbs after noon can do to you. This is more self-destructive
behavior.”

“Ah, the whiskey is mine and I helped her on the pizza. I actually encouraged her
to eat. She’s getting a little skinny,” a familiar voice said.

Damn it to hell. Holland shook her head and turned, praying the situation didn’t look
as bad as she feared. Nope. It was so much worse. Dax stood there wearing nothing
but a towel wrapped around his lean waist, his chest all muscled and perfect. He carried
a second towel, which he rubbed over his wet head.

“Captain, why don’t you go and get dressed?” She managed to bite the words out, her
whole body flaming with embarrassment.

Dax grinned and winked her way. “Sorry, sweetheart. I thought we were alone.”

“Well, you can see now that we’re not,” she shot back. “So clothes would really be
appropriate here.”

“All right, then. I suppose I could get dressed after our lazy morning.” He grabbed
his bag and turned to the bathroom. Just when she thought she was home free, he whirled
back, his eyes narrowing on Chad. “You look familiar, kid. Maybe I saw you on YouTube
or someplace. And just so you know, Holland, I’m completely emotionally available,
so don’t you go thinking you can use me for some psychosexual therapy thing. I am
available to you in every way a man can be to his woman, darlin’.”

She sighed as he strode off and closed the door behind him.

“Is that who I think it is?” Chad had turned a perfect shade of red.
Even his angry flush looked as if someone had painted it on his skin. He didn’t go
blotchy the way she did.