Beach Side Beds and Sandy Paths (18 page)

“His penis,” Kaylee says all smug.

“Yes, his penis. It was harder than I expected, and I panicked. I yanked my hand away, but somehow it was all in slow mo. I had nothing left to reach for, and I was going down, so I clawed at the only thing I could find—the shower curtain. Needless to say we both fell and the shower rod landed on our heads.”

Her face is bright red from laughing
, and no matter how hard she tries to suppress her giggles, they keep coming. “Word of advice,” she says. “Leave the shower sex to the more experienced. Maybe in a few months try again because when done right?” She purses her lips and nods her head. “Amazing.”

My
stomach growls, again and Kaylee’s eyes narrow. “Sheesh bestie, you really are hungry. Why don’t I make you some of my famous banana nut pancakes?”Another growl from my stomach, and Kaylee jumped up. “That settles that.”

She gets the ingredients out then her hands land on her hips. “Where in the world is that banana?”

Oh crap. My eyes widen, but before she can see, I flatten them out. Kaylee can never know the truth about her banana. I don’t think she’d ever look at a banana the same way again. I know I won’t. I bite my tongue, hoping the pain will push down the laugh, barreling up my throat.

Think. Think fast
. “Regular pancakes will be fine. Bananas make me a little bloated and gassy and since Ryan and I finally did it, I don’t want my stomach making any funky noises.”

She stops looking and snaps her finger at me. “Good thinking.
Now keep talking.”

I take another bite of a cracker
.

“Oh the good stuff now. Yay!” She claps and turns back to the eggs and cracks one into the bowl.

“After the disaster that was the shower foreplay, he dried me off and wrapped a towel around me, tucking the edge in. He pulled me close, and we started up again. He told me he loved me and we stumbled into our room. My towel fell, and I yanked his off.”

“I always knew you had a little sex kitten in you,” Kaylee says.

I ignore her comment and keep going. “All the awkwardness was out of the way because really, I think we took awkward to a whole new level in the bathroom, and it was just perfect. I kept thinking that I would feel different after. I don’t. I still feel like me. I guess now... I just feel content. Happy.
So
happy. That day I dragged Ryan out from under the Lincoln and confronted him—”

“The day it all started.”

“It started
way
before that, but that was the turning point. I just never thought I could possibly feel any happier. But I swear if I stand up right now rainbows will shoot out of my ass and unicorns will walk across the living room.”

Kaylee pours batter onto the pan and turns back. “If rainbows came out of your butt I think I might take you to the doctor. Or maybe put you on stage with Nate because that would be one heck of a magic trick. I bet with that act he’d make it to Vegas.”

“Rainbows coming out of my ass or not, Nate will make it. He’s the best damn magician I’ve ever met.”

Kaylee rolls her big green eyes. “Because you’ve met so many.”

“Maybe so, but Brett was impressed, and he lived in Vegas,” I say.

“Next trip we should totally go. Maybe for graduation.” She gets that look on her face, the one that tells me no matter what me or anyone says, come
summerwe’ll be there. 

“That’d be fun. Maybe even invite Brett along. Give him the chance to go back home.”

“We are so doing it!” Kaylee bounces over to the stove and flips the pancakes.

“So doing what?” I hear behind me
, and I can’t keep the dorky grin off my face.

“Vegas,” Kaylee sings
, and I swivel in my chair.

Ryan walks toward me, all sexy and manly and
totally mine. “Vegas, huh?” he says and kisses the top of my head before we share a smile.”

“Yup and it will be a blast,” Kaylee says.

“I hope I’m not interrupting girl talk, but those pancakes smell amazing, and I’m starving,” Ryan says, but he doesn’t look at me. Instead he looks right at Kaylee, and he tips his head to her.

She looks at him and smiles, and even though no words are exchanged between them, I feel like a lot is said.

Unable to resist, I say, “Grab a plate. We’re having plain pancakes tonight. If only Kaylee’s banana didn’t go missing...”

My internal clock is all jacked up. After eating at two in the morning, my body was fueled up, and I couldn’t get Lex to the bed fast enough. I tried to be cool and do the wall thing, but maybe I need to chill out and keep things to the mattress until we’ve gotten used to each other, since we ended up toppled and twisted just like the shower.

Much like the first time, it left me feeling like goop
, and I zonked out again. But now I’m wide awake and the sun hasn’t come up yet. Lex’s ass is perched right where I like it, and I start moving against her, kissing that spot behind her ear, hoping she’s not too sore for another go.

Her mouth twitches, but she doesn’t make another move. How long has it been? Seems like I dozed off for hours, but when I twist to the clock, it’s only been an hour since we came back upstairs. And the heavy breathing that slides from Lex’s mouth tells me that there’s not a chance right now.

She’s naked, and she’s next to me. I yell at my dick to move away from her rock hard ass. I think part of me gets it now, just like before when Lex and I started dating. No wonder Nate’s always packing rubber. I feel like there’s no purpose in even getting dressed today.

I push my hips forward again,
then quickly retreat, flying from the bed and pacing the room. Lex must be dead exhausted because she still hasn’t moved. Her face is pushed somewhat into the pillow, and now that I’m not in the bed the sheets are splayed across her body, her back exposed in the early morning light. I gulp at the long line that runs down her spine, the curve of her ass, the one smooth leg that’s hitched up under the blanket, and damn it. I have to get out of here if I’m ever gonna get rid of this woody.

The bathroom floor is cold on my feet as I shut the door behind me. The shower curtain is still spread on the tile
, and I smirk as I put it back in place. I don’t even reach for the hot water handle, cranking the shower on with just the cold. My nipples perk right up, but my junk starts to deflate.

Damn, I feel like I’m living something that isn’t my life. It’s ten thousand times better than my life. If I could moonwalk I’d do it across the tub floor. My mouth is stuck in this stupid grin and before I know it, I’m singing who the hell knows what even though I’m the most tone deaf person in the universe.

Lex is still asleep when I come out of the bathroom, and I think I’ve forgotten how to walk normally. I’m shaking my hips and doing shit I never thought I would as I get dressed and make my way downstairs. A wave of heat goes through my face when I see a girl in one of Nick’s shirts digging through the kitchen cupboards. But my feet won’t stop dancing for a second, even when she turns around stifles her laughter at my lack of rhythm. I pretend to tip a hat at her as I make my way to the door. Maybe a few minutes with my ass in the sand will calm me the hell down so what Lex and I did isn’t painted all over my face.

The sun decides to make its first appearance when I take a step in the ocean. The water is ice against my toes. Even after that needed cold shower, my body is blazing with heat.

“Life is damn good,” I say to the rising sun, and I mean it. For the first time in months I can say that and know it’s true. Right here, in the immediate present, I can’t think of a single thing that’s not worth smiling about. Even the thought of my brother isn’t pissing me off.

I kick the water and cross my arms, thinking hard about anything but Lexie so I don’t end up having to take an ocean dip in my clothes. Visualizing the transmission I’ll have to put in the IROC when I get back seems to work, and my head starts going. Actually, Brett might be more helpful than Pop-pop in this case
if he knows the inner workings of an IROC transmission. I don’t think Brett will just sit in the recliner and bark out orders.

“You’re up early,” Nate says, kicking up the water as he wades in next to me.

“You too.”

“Yeah. I was gonna try this illusion with the curtains in mine and Kaylee’s room, and I needed to be up right as the sun came out.”

“Did it work?”

“Sort of. I’m still having a hard time getting the angle right.” He shrugs. “Guess I’ll have to try it back home. It won’t look as cool though with the smaller windows.”

“Well, when you get it right I want to see it.”

“Definitely. It
should look like there’s a ghost moving the curtains. But at the moment it just looks like I’m crapping myself while staring at the sunrise.”

I chuckle and shake my head at the sky. There are about six clouds among the orange and yellows, and I pull in a breath, taking all this romantic shit in before we gotta head back tomorrow.

“So, uh…” Nate says, scratching the back of his head. “You gonna be around today?”

I smirk at the water. “I don’t know. Why?”

“Just thought I’d tell you in case I don’t get the chance… it takes a few days for stuff to disappear, and well, you’re seeing your grandma in three days.”

My brows pull inward when I turn to look at him. “Stuff?”

His body shakes with silent laughter, and he scratches his neck with eyebrows raised. I pull my hand up and rub the same spot on my own neck, but it’s not like the skin feels any different.

“Oh, damn.” I laugh and he laughs too. “How bad is it?”

“Looks like you’ve been hit with a purple paintball.”

Shit. “Hopefully it yellows by Sunday.”

“Yeah, or Grams is gonna cut off your balls and cook ‘em.”

“I can’t believe you remember she said that.”

“It’s pretty much traumatized me.”

I try to pull at my collar, but I’m wearing a T-shirt so all that does is earn me a good razzing from Nate.

“Use some of Lex’s makeup,” he says.

“Hell no.”

“Don’t knock it. I’ve had some class A hickeys and no one’s known.”

I slug him in the arm, and he punches me back, sending thunders of pain through my shoulder. “Damn,” I say, rotating my arm. He’s been working on his hook.

The sun gets all the way up over the ocean, and I crank my neck back to the house. I wonder if Lex is up now. In fact, I see someone coming out the front door, but my stomach drops when I see it’s Kaylee.

“I’m gonna…” I mumble, gesturing to the house.

“Yeah, yeah.” Nate laughs and before I take a step, he holds his fist out for me and we pound. I don’t know why Kaylee and Lex needed three hours to talk about what happened. I pretty much summed it up with subtext.

My feet get covered in sand as I jog past Kaylee and into the house. I head to the downstairs bathroom just to rinse off my toes, and a voice makes me stop in the hallway.

“How many times are we gonna go through this shit?” Brett says, and I’m not sure who he’s talking to, but since I don’t hear a response, I’m guessing he’s on the phone.

“He was a dealer, Kar. You can’t keep blaming me for—”

My mouth drops open a little, and I scoot around the wall separating the living room from the bathroom. Brett’s running his hand over the back of his neck, ears up in flames, and his knees bounce as he talks into his cell.

“Fine. I won’t stop on my way back to Colorado. It’s not a big deal anyway
, right? Not like we meant shit to each other.”

He pauses for a second, then he’s up to his feet so fast I jolt backward.

“
You
were the one who didn’t want to
be
anything. Don’t think I didn’t love you just because I turned your dad in. That’s a bunch of shit and you know it. You
know
it.”

There’s a voice that’s loud enough for me to hear even in the hallway, but I can’t tell what the person is saying. Brett paces the rug, his free hand tight in a fist at his side.

“It doesn’t matter anyway. I guess there’s nothing there for me to see.”

He brings his phone down and pushes the end button. A
loud curse flies from his mouth as he chucks it on the couch. There’s this part of me who knows to leave stuff alone, to walk away, and let him deal. And it’s about to win out when he catches my eye, and I’m going
damn it
. Guess I have to stay.

“Uh…” I mutter, because I’m brilliant like that. “You all right, man?”

His brows crunch together in the center of his forehead, and he lets out a huff. “Like you give a shit.”

He’s right. I don’t think I do… but I’m watching him turn red, and for some odd reason, I’m getting that feeling like he’s a real person. He’s a kid who got thrown a pretty shitty hand in life, and the way he’s pacing, the way his jaw is flexed, even the way he’s rubbing the back of his neck raw… I see my brother. Not just my brother, but
myself
.

“Hey, I was gonna ask you…” I start, the blood pounding through my ears as I take a
step forward. “There’s a 1980 Chevy transmission I gotta work on when we get back. I could use the help.”

His eyes flash to mine, and a bunch of shit goes on behind them. They look confused, then optimistic, then… pissed as hell.

“You don’t have to do that, you know.”

“Do what?” I ask, even though I know exactly what he’s talking to.

“Be all brotherly and shit. I know you don’t want to, and I’m tired of people sticking around because they pity me. So save your breath.”

“I’m not trying to pity you. Just seems like you’re dealing with something
, and cars take my mind off stuff I gotta deal with.”

“You don’t deal with shit!” he yells, taking a step toward me. My back automatically straightens in defense. “You’ve got a family and friends. Hell, you’ve got that kickass girl upstairs who worships you and you have no idea.
No clue
what it’s like to have real world problems that screw your brain up.”

“Are you forgetting that we have the same Mom?” I say, trying to keep my voice level, but it’s not working. “Did you forget that my dad
died
? How in the hell does that not classify?”

“Your dad’s been dead for what? Ten years? Get the hell over it,” he spits, and heat blasts up my neck
, and I cross my arms, clenching my T-shirt with my fists so I don’t end up putting them through his face. “I deal with losing my dad every damn day. I don’t know where the hell he is, or if he’s okay. So having him dead might be easier instead of wondering all the time.”

I blink back the burning moisture prickling behind my eyes. He doesn’t get that I’d give
anything
to have my dad back. He could be in the military even, and yeah, it’d be scary as hell, but he’d be alive. I can’t believe he’s even comparing the two, and before I know it, my mouth shoots off before I can stop it.

“Yeah, maybe it would be.”

“What?” he says, his face getting closer to mine.

“It’d be easier on you if he was dead.” I clench my jaw, grit my teeth, and keep my hands fisted in my shirt. “Then in ten years I can tell you to get the hell over it.”

The words taste like acid on my tongue, and Brett’s glassy eyes blaze red right before he pulls his arm back and clocks me across the jaw.

Blood instantly pools
in my mouth, and there’s about five seconds when everything is absolutely numb, then the pain hits. I unlock my hold from my shirt and get ready to uppercut him in the gut, but Lex’s voice from the stairs stops me mid-punch.

“What the hell? Stop!”

My vision is blurry as I blink up to Lex. She runs between me and my brother, facing me and putting a hand on my chest. Heat smacks into my gut as I rotate my jaw. She’s protecting
him
from
me
?

Brett’s eyes are big when I look at him, and I throw my hands up in surrender.

I tried. I tried to be the good brother and I tried to understand. I tried to get past all the shit he said, and I tried to be the bigger person. And you know what? Brett’s right. I don’t give a freaking shit anymore.

“I’m done,” I say to both of them. Lex’s eyebrows pull in
, and she opens her mouth, but I march straight out the door before she gets a word out. I spit the blood out in the sand and slam my ass in the Lincoln.

I had to test her out anyway.