Be Careful What You Wish For (50 page)

The 2008 play-off push. Victor Moses, one of the stars from my treasured academy celebrates scoring against Burnley. He would later go on to be sold for peanuts by the administrator.

John Bostock, revered as the best footballer of his age in Europe. It was a disappointment when he chose to go to Spurs.

Watching the 5–0 win against Burnley that clinches our position in the play-offs.

2008 play-off semi-final vs. Bristol City. The loss of this game resulted in me taking decisions that had far-reaching consequences.

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

The writing of a book, as I found out, is an extremely difficult task. It’s one that requires a great deal of commitment, time and, I feel in the instance of an autobiography, one where you have to dig deep and be honest. I cannot say it was always a process I overly enjoyed, but it certainly was a challenge and one which I did my very best to rise to. Writing a book about your life and experiences requires a certain amount of fortitude, even when you are in the ascendant. Writing one when things are certainly not going your way has an element of masochism to it. But, beyond all of that, it has been an experience, and that is what life is about. There is also a touch of privilege in being published and, dare I say it, if the reader likes what they see, the ends have justified the means. With all of the above in mind I would like to thank the following people.

Theo Paphitis for saying ‘write the bloody book’ and engendering in me a ‘right, I bloody well will’ attitude. Without him I never would have attempted it, so it is him you have to blame. Paul Smith, who helped me write the book. ‘Smithy’ soon realised this was a poisoned chalice as not only did he have to look at me for
days
sitting across the table in my house in Spain, but he also had to suffer endless abuse every time he dared make a suggestion. In the end I wrote nigh on every word, but the book benefitted from Paul’s, at times invaluable, counsel and structuring.

My thanks to David Luxton, my literary agent, for his support, perseverance and the endless hours he spent on the phone to me in Spain. Judy Daish for introducing me to David, which got me the agent and ultimately the publisher. Appreciation goes out to Matt Phillips and Rowan Yapp at Yellow Jersey for having the vision to publish this book, Justine Taylor for her hard work, input and advice and James Jones for his cover design.

Despite extremely trying circumstances – namely dealing with me – I would like to thank my partner Suzanne for being supportive and encouraging throughout this project, always saying things were good even when I knew they were not. And my parents, Peter and Linda, for at times saying the exact opposite, and giving me some much needed honesty and objectivity.

A thank you is due to Nick Moran, one of my closest friends and a talented writer himself, for helping me (hopefully) learn to write. After I had spent two weeks huffing and puffing over two chapters, he also came up with the immortal line ‘Well, it’s a start,’ which pushed me on to be better than some of the initial drivel I had written.

I would like to thank my dear friend Deano, just for being a good friend, Mark Ryan, godfather of my daughter, Cameron, who I know will come through. Also, to that end, all those people who have stood by me during the last few years where things have been difficult.

I would like to thank the following people who have been encouraging and supportive during the process of writing and shown a genuine interest in this book: Jeff McGeachie, Ian Wright,
Mark
Bright, Con O’Neill, Richard Keys, Andy Gray, Ian Payne, Anna Panour, Andrew Johnson, Anna Keel, Charles Koppel, Mark Fuller, Johnny and Carol Howard, Neil Warnock, Steve Bruce, Adam Pearson, David Groves, Greg Charalambides (kindest man in the world), my Marbella gang, Simon, Marco and Nicky Dalli, Marco and Carlo Morelli, Ash, Grant, my housekeeper Anna and groundsman Tarik, Graham Donkin, John Alvarez and my dear and brilliant friends stateside, John and Walter Almeida and George Raposa. I could go on.

I would like to thank my brother Dominic just for being a brilliant brother and one who has always watched my back even in sometimes impossible circumstances – we tried so hard, mate, especially with that football club. Thanks to Kevin Watts for being so loyal and committed to me for ten years, Lisa Kavanagh for being a fantastic PA. To Avril and Andrew Hall who, almost literally over the last five months, saved my life – Andrew, your generosity and support has astounded me.

To the Crystal Palace fans who, on the whole, were brilliant with me – I hope you know I gave my best.

To the industry that is football, a bullshit, nonsensical island in its own right, but one that has been a hell of an experience to be involved with and one I have to say I miss every now and then.

To those that read this book, thank you and I hope you enjoy it.

To my surrogate daughter, little Ally Sophie Walker, who is a wonderful big sister to my little girl. And finally to Cameron, who this book is dedicated to, who is the best piece of work I have ever done and who gives me the reason to want to be better.

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Published by Yellow Jersey Press 2012

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