Anastasia's Secret (24 page)

C
HAPTER
30

It was in April that the new soldiers arrived in the town, some from Omsk, some from Yekaterinburg. They supposedly were there to ensure that the Bolshevik regime was carried out exactly, meaning no one had more than a certain amount of space to live in or retained any luxuries, or was entitled to anything more than the meanest rations. The two bands were not friendly with each other, though, and we heard stories about looting in the town, and random arrests of lawful citizens. Oddly, we were protected from all of this by our guard, but they could easily have been overrun or turned on us themselves, and I didn’t understand how Kobylinsky managed to keep control.

Then one day, orders came from Moscow to arrest comrades Hendrikova, Dolgorukov, and Tatischev. The countess, the prince, and the general all moved into the Governor’s House with us, with Trina as well, who until this time had had the comparative freedom of the suite. The countess and Trina brought their maids with them, and suddenly we were very crowded indeed. It was a little warmer, so we could once again use the large hall to gather together, but we had almost no privacy, and the demands on our already limited sanitary facilities were extreme. Worst of all, Alexei had caught whooping cough from Kolya, and burst a blood vessel coughing.

Although I teased and tormented him when he was well, Alyosha’s bad illnesses put me under a pall of despair. It was as if there were two Alexeis: the impish little brother with too acute an eye for what was going on around him, and the shriveled creature who embodied pain so completely that everyone near him felt it. This time was one of the worst ones. It reminded me of the time in Poland, first at Skernevizi then at Spala, when we thought he would die. He recovered then, but it was hard to imagine him well again when he was in the grip of such terrible pain.

Dr. Derevenko called us all into Alexei’s room. We sisters stood clutching each other for comfort. Mama and Papa were at Alyosha’s bedside, looking on helplessly as he moaned in wordless agony, his eyes glassy and his face beaded with sweat. He was the color of the heavy sky before a blizzard.

The doctor spoke. “We must all be prepared for the worst. I cannot get the usual medicines to relieve Alexei’s pain, and his fever remains very high.”

“Is there nothing you can do for Baby?” Mama’s voice was barely above a whisper.

“There is a new treatment, very experimental. I have what I need to try it, but there is no guarantee it will have any effect at all, and it could make him worse.”

Mama turned and looked at all of us, as if to say, “What are you doing here? This is a nightmare world I inhabit with my son alone.” Papa took the cue and nodded to us, and we all filed out slowly and quietly.

I was with Papa in his study later when Dr. Derevenko came in to speak with him. “I cannot persuade the tsaritsa to make a decision about Alexei’s treatment.” He looked exhausted and pained himself. “I fear that if I do not do something his body will not stand the pain, and he will die.”

Papa sighed. “My poor boy. Yet is death the worst? He has suffered so much in his short life already, more than most people ever do.”

The doctor was silent for a moment. When he spoke, it was quietly, gravely. “This treatment I spoke of. It might work. But I must caution you that it could be dangerous.”

“If I had only myself to consider, I would say let the boy expire and rest at last. But my wife. Sunny.” He paused, then looked up at the doctor with resolve. “You must do whatever you can.”

The doctor bowed to him and left. Papa turned his attention to me. “Little Nastya, I know I can count on you never to repeat what you heard me say. If Alexei were still the heir, it would be different. But he is just a boy with more than his share of sorrow and pain.”

I went to him and kissed him on the cheek. He patted my arm. I’m not sure he ever really forgave me for being a girl, especially since Alexei had turned out to be so ill. But the more I understood about what it must have been like to have to rule a country as vast as Russia, the more I forgave my papa anything.

We held our breath for the next twenty-four hours, and gradually our mood lightened as Alyosha’s terrible moans subsided. To everyone’s surprise and relief, Dr. Derevenko’s remedy worked. Alexei did recover, but was extremely weak after his attack.

Outside our little world, which was centered on Alexei’s condition, changes and upheavals continued. The soldiers from Yekaterinburg had gone off to raid a small city to the north of Tobolsk. Others came to take their place. But disaster struck on April 22, when a train that had been shrouded in secrecy along its route arrived in Tyumen, its passengers disembarked, and carts and horses navigated the rough roads down to Tobolsk. The mysterious official was a special envoy from Moscow, sent to shatter our world.

Kobylinsky came to tell us the news. “I’m as surprised as anyone. I had no idea he was coming, and have still not been told the reason for his arrival.” The colonel paced up and down the hall. Our eyes followed him back and forth.

“Perhaps they will take us to Moscow and put us on trial once and for all,” Mama said.

“I don’t know. But the fellow addressed the guards, showered them with praise for carrying out their mission to keep you imprisoned.”

“Does he have any real power, this one?” Papa asked.

“As much power as anyone could have. His orders were signed by Sverdlov himself, and Sverdlov has a direct link to Lenin. This fellow can have anyone he chooses executed without a trial.”

A chill ran through me. I thought of Sasha and the good colonel, who had been secretly trying to help us escape, even if their efforts had come to nothing so far.

“You’ll have a chance to judge him for yourself tomorrow. He will visit you,” Kobylinsky said.

We were all anxious about this strange new development, and few of us ate much of our meager dinner.

The next day, three official-looking men came to see us. We were all gathered together in the hall. The men were Yakovlev, Khokhriakov, and Rodionov. Yakovlev was the leader. Very well spoken and courteous. He asked us our names and inquired about our health. They even went to Alyosha’s room to question him, as he was still unable to sit up, let alone get out of bed.

“I am here to inform you that your guard and Colonel Kobylinsky have been relieved of their posts.”

For an instant, I wondered if they could be setting us free. Had they at last decided that we were no threat to anyone, and might be allowed just to live in peace somewhere in the wilds of Siberia? My hope was short-lived.

“My men will take over the guard. They have strict orders not to harass you, but will deal with any breach of security in the harshest way. I need not tell you what that is.”

I shuddered again for Sasha. What could this mean for him?

I soon discovered that I should have been much more concerned about what it meant for us. Yakovlev returned a day or so later with his two assistants. They looked serious and arranged themselves in a row in front of the door as if they wanted to prevent us from running out.

“Nicholas Romanov, I have orders to remove you from Tobolsk.”

Mama cried out and clutched her throat. “No! You cannot take him from his family!”

“Comrade Romanova, I can do whatever I want, and the ex-tsar is to come with me under guard. I will give you a few hours to arrange your affairs and decide whether anyone will accompany you.”

“I refuse to leave my wife and children!” Papa said.

“If you persist in this unwise attitude, you will be forcibly removed, as would anyone who defied the orders of the Bolshevik government.”

Yakovlev never changed the tone of his voice. He was clearly a man not accustomed to being defied in any way. He simply turned and walked out with the other two men.

Mama retired to her sitting room, unable to face anyone. Demidova went with her. The rest of us sat and stared at one another, uncertain what to do or think. At last the members of the suite scattered into other parts of the house, perhaps to be alone with their thoughts.

I could hear Mama pacing back and forth across the floor of her bedroom. It was unlike her to be so restless and disturbed.

“We must talk this through,” Tatiana said, calling us all from our private musing.

“Papa cannot go alone. We cannot let him,” Olga said. “I shall accompany him.”

“No!” I said. I couldn’t bear the thought of sensitive Olga, who was prone to sickness and still coughed from the German measles, being the only defense for Papa against heaven knew what. Besides, she was so lovely, she could put herself in danger just by traveling with him. “Perhaps I should go,” I said.

“You are too young,” Tatiana said.

“I am nearly seventeen,” I said. “I am of age!”

“Mama must go with Papa. It is the only way.” This was Mashka. Mama was weak too, but we all realized that she would never forgive herself if she allowed him to go away without her, remembering those anxious times when he abdicated and could not get back to Tsarskoe Selo. “And I will go with them too, since I am the strongest of us. Tatiana must stay and nurse Alexei. Olga, you are the oldest so you can run the household and deal with the guards.” As usual, Mashka—plump, gentle Mashka—had seen exactly what had to be done, not so much on a practical level as Tatiana would see it, but on a level that went deeper and got at the truth.

“And me?” I asked. “What about me? Am I to have no task when everyone else is allowed to be helpful and strong?”

Olga answered. “You have the most difficult task of all, Nastya. You must ensure that we do not become too sad and hopeless.”

They still thought of me as the clown. The one who would always find a way to make everyone laugh. Roller-skating on the
Standart
. Throwing snowballs. Changing the words to songs to make them funny. Well, I supposed, it was something anyway. I realized they assumed that, because I was the youngest sister, I could be cheerful because I didn’t understand fully what was happening to us. But I had more experience of love, at least, more than they did, and knowledge they could not imagine concerning our imprisonment, which I had gained through Sasha. It comforted me to know that. I had developed a very realistic view of life, and deep experience of love and distance and sorrow and abandonment. Even though I knew that Sasha was acting in our best interest at that time, I still could not help feeling abandoned by him. And I knew, better than the rest of them, that clowns are often the saddest people of all.

“I’ll go talk to Mama,” Tatiana said. She was the right person to do it. She had always been closest to Mama, and Mama trusted her with Alexei’s care.

Tatiana stayed with Mama and helped her decide what to bring with her, which photographs were too precious and important to leave her possession. She had already sewn as many of her private jewels as she could inside her clothing, or covered them with cloth to disguise them as buttons. She brought her Bible and several icons. We all gathered at the little chapel in the hall to pray before dinner.

Everyone came together for dinner, but hardly anyone could speak. Only small pleasantries, and questions about whether Mama and Papa had remembered certain necessities.