An Honest Love (28 page)

Because I’m falling in love with him
.

“Elisabeth, stop groaning,” Ruth whispered. “People can hear you.”

Mortified, Elisabeth sat up straight, determined to focus on her brother’s wedding instead of being so selfish and only thinking of herself. She couldn’t help but smile at the way he looked at Anna during the ceremony. Maybe someday Aaron would look at her the same way.

Stop it!

Wedding services lasted about three hours, and when this one was over, Elisabeth was the first to welcome Anna to the family. “I’m so happy for you,” she said, hugging her.

“
Danki
.” Anna beamed. Then she looked past Elisabeth’s shoulder. “Oh, I’m glad Aaron decided to come.”

Elisabeth swung around to see Aaron standing a few feet behind her, several people in between them. He was talking to Stephen, his profile to her. She turned back to Anna. “I should let you go. Everyone will want to give you their congratulations.”

“We’ll talk later.”

Elisabeth smiled and nodded, then spun around to see Aaron. But he had disappeared. She walked over to Stephen. “Where did Aaron
geh
?”

Stephen shrugged. “I don’t know. We only talked for a minute, then he left.”

She stood on tiptoes, searching for him in the crowd of people. After several minutes she gave up. Maybe he’d gone back to his old habit of leaving as soon as the fellowship started.

Sighing, she noticed that food was being served. She should go in the kitchen and ask if anyone needed help, but she didn’t feel like doing that. What she really wanted was to be alone. She walked out the back door, unnoticed, then walked toward the shed on the edge of the field behind the house. The grass had started to grow, and she knew by summer it would be past her knees.

A cool breeze lifted her dress, but the air was welcome. Again they were having another unseasonably warm March day, and she didn’t even need a sweater outside. A taste of spring, although it wouldn’t last long. Soon enough the cold air would return and probably another snowfall or two with it. Ohio weather was always unpredictable. She leaned against the back of the shed, listening to the voices of children running and playing.

“Elisabeth.”

At the sound of Aaron’s voice, Elisabeth’s breath caught in her throat. She rolled her head to the side and took him in. His black hat was pushed back on his forehead, revealing a thick section of blond bang. Her cheeks heating, she suddenly turned away.

“Hi, Aaron.”

He moved to stand next to her. “What are you doing out here by yourself ?”

“
Nix
.”

“That sounds like something I would say.”

“You must be rubbing off on me.”

“I hope not.”

She was about to correct him when she saw the humor in his eyes. His remark made her lips lift in a half smile. “Are you still mad at me?”

“I was never mad at you, Elisabeth. I don’t think I ever could be.”

“I wouldn’t blame you if you were. I was a bit snippy with you the other day.”

He looked at her. “A bit?”

“Okay, more than a bit. I shouldn’t have been upset about Kacey.” Elisabeth sighed, letting her head fall back against the shed again.

He chuckled. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you were jealous.”

Her face heated. “Me, jealous?” She laughed. But it sounded a little too loud, so she stopped and cleared her throat. “I’m not jealous.”

“
Gut
.” Aaron pulled a blade of grass from the ground. “Because there’s nothing to be jealous of. Kacey needed someone to talk to, and she came and saw me.”

“I know that. She came back after you left.”

Aaron’s face registered surprise. “She did?”

“
Ya
. She said to tell you that she’s sorry. And that she wished you the best.”

“Wow.” Aaron stared straight ahead. “I wouldn’t have expected that of her.”

“What happened?”

“Well, as soon as I was arrested, she dropped me completely. No contact at all.” He put the blade between his thumbs and blew. The vibrating blade made a high-pitched whistle.

“You’re just full of hidden talents, aren’t you?”

He cast a sideways look. “I like to think so.” He let the blade float to the ground, then he moved to stand in front of Elisabeth. “I just want you to know that I have no intention of getting involved with Kacey or drugs again. I’m not interested in either. And I made a commitment to God and to the church that I’m going to keep.”

“But what if she drags you back into them again?”

“She won’t. She says she’s clean now, and hopefully she’ll stay that way. Either way, one of the many things I learned in rehab is that doing drugs is a choice.
Ya
, they’re addictive, and when addiction is pulling you under, you feel helpless. But eventually you have to decide how you want to live—at the mercy of drugs or at the mercy of God. I chose God.” He slipped his hands in his pockets. “I don’t think I realized that until a few weeks ago. Those talks we’ve had really set me thinking, and I don’t think I would have figured it out by myself that I wasn’t just running to the Amish to keep from drugs, but I was running to God.”

She looked up into his eyes, a catch in her throat. She had always thought they were blue, similar to hers, but from this close up she could see they were more of a silvery gray. “I can’t take credit for that, Aaron.”

He rocked back and forth on his heels. “
Demut
. That’s a lovely Amish quality you possess, Elisabeth, but sometimes I think you take it too far.”

“What do you mean?” Amish were supposed to be humble, to think less of themselves than more. How could she possibly screw that up? “Are you saying I’m too humble?”

Shaking his head, he said, “
Nee
. Maybe humble isn’t the right word. Sometimes I get the impression you think you don’t measure up.” When she started to protest, he lifted his hand. “The reason I know is because I feel the same way about myself.”

Lukas and Anna greeted their guests and accepted their congratulations for the next hour. They barely had time to look at each other, much less say anything. But every once in a while he would glance at her in such a way that made her toes curl in her shoes. While she was enjoying visiting with the wedding guests, she couldn’t wait until they were alone.

When they had a short break in meeting the well-wishers, Lukas spoke. “I need a drink. Do you want anything?”

She shook her head. “I’m fine.”

“All right. I’ll be right back, Mrs. Byler.” He winked, then left to go to the dining room where they were serving food and beverages.

Edna came up to her, smiling. “Having a
gut
time?”

“
Ya. Danki
for everything,
Mami
. I know you worked really hard to make this day special.”

“It was nothing.”

She was about to speak again when an agonizing pain took her breath away. It felt like she was being slashed with a knife.

“Anna?”

Her mother’s voice sounded far away. The room swirled around her. Voices buzzed in her ear. She tried to stand, but the pain was too intense.

Everything went black.

Lukas’s stomach hit his feet when he saw his Anna lying in a lump on the floor. He had just emerged from the dining room when he saw her, Edna crouched down beside her. He dropped his drink and shoved his way through the crowd toward them.

“Lukas,” Edna exclaimed, remaining beside her daughter.

Carefully he rolled Anna over. His gut lurched at her ghostly face. “What happened?”

“She fainted, just a second ago. Everything was fine, then she turned around and doubled over. Before I could get to her, she passed out.” Worry seeped into her eyes.

He laid his hand on her chest, feeling it rise and fall beneath his palm. Thank God she was still breathing. “We need an ambulance!” When no one responded he yelled, “I know someone has to have a cell phone here!”

An elderly woman, dressed in full Old Order garb, handed him a cell phone, her head hung low. He flipped it open and punched in the emergency number.

“911. What is your emergency?”

“My wife fainted. She’s passed out.”

“Sir? I’m sorry, but I didn’t understand you. Do you speak English?”

Lukas hadn’t even realized he’d been speaking
Dietsch
. “My wife,” he said more slowly, in English, “she fainted. I need an ambulance.” He gave the operator the address.

“I’ll send one right over.”

He hung up the phone. “They’re on their way.” He knelt back down beside Anna and cradled her head under his arm, distressed that she hadn’t woken up.

Joseph and Emma appeared. “
Gut
heavens,” Emma said, her hands going to her cheeks. “What happened?”

Edna started to cry. “
Mei dochder
,” she said through her tears. “The doctor told her this would happen, that she would get worse, but she refused to believe him.”

Bewildered, Lukas looked at Edna. “What are you talking about?”

“I can’t tell you. She made me promise.”

“Everyone outside,” Joseph hollered, guiding the guests to the door. “We need room in here.”

“Edna!” Lukas shouted. “She’s going to be
mei frau
. If something’s wrong with her, I have to know!”

Edna hesitated for a moment, then nodded, tears streaming down her cheeks. “She had a procedure done a few weeks ago. She’d been feeling some pain lately, and the doctor wanted her to come in, but she refused.”

“What kind of procedure?”

“I forget what it’s called, but it’s for endometriosis.”

“What?” He’d never heard of endo-whatever.

“I don’t understand it, Lukas. She wouldn’t tell me everything. All I know is that there was a chance this would happen.”

Shock coursed through Lukas just as the paramedics came through the door, carrying various pieces of medical equipment. They immediately went to Anna and knelt down next to her. “Are you her husband?” a stocky man with a black mustache asked.

“
Ya
. ”

Anna’s eyelids suddenly fluttered open. “Lukas?”

“I’m here,
lieb
.” He stroked her cheek, trying to ignore the confusion whirling inside of him. He had to focus on her. “What happened?”

“I don’t know.” She glanced around at the men who were crouched down beside her. “Who are they?”

“The paramedics. We couldn’t get you to wake up.”

“Mr.?”

“Byler,” Lukas said.

“Mr. Byler,” he said, looking first at Lukas, then at Edna. “I’ll need you both to step aside so we can examine her.”

Lukas nodded, but didn’t move, unable to let her go.

“Mr. Byler, could you please stand over there?”

“But Anna—”

“We’ll take good care of her. But we need room to do our job.”

Lukas nodded numbly, then got to his feet and walked over to the couch, leaving Anna in their hands. He watched helplessly while the paramedics asked her questions. He strained to hear her answers but couldn’t because she kept her voice low. The man with the mustache listened to her heart while the other paramedic put a blood pressure cuff on her arm and some sort of large, plastic clamp on her finger. Most everyone had left the house though a few people had stayed in the room. When he felt a hand on his arm, he turned and looked at Edna.

“You have to convince her to go to the hospital,” Edna said. “If you don’t, this will happen again. I’m sure of it.”

“How long has she known about this?”

“A couple of months.” Edna’s tears had dried up, her stricken expression becoming stoic. “You have to make her realize how important it is that she see her doctor right away. I just know something worse will happen if she continues to ignore what her body and the doctor are telling her.”

The mustached paramedic rose from the floor and came over to Lukas. “She seems fine, Mr. Byler. Blood pressure is normal, oxygen level is good. She says she’s all right, that she just felt a little dizzy and that she hadn’t eaten much for breakfast. Still, we want to take her to the hospital. We asked her, but she refused. I thought you might be able to convince her to agree.”

Lukas looked at Anna, who was now in a seated position on the floor, her legs tucked beneath the skirt of her dark blue dress. She cast him a sideways glance, then looked away when their eyes met. He turned his attention back to the paramedic. “Did she say why she wouldn’t go?”