Authors: Carmella Jones
She watched as Thomas avoided her gaze. His jaw set, but then he took a deep breath and nodded. "Yes. Victoria, what I know may come as a shock to you. Are you certain you want to know the truth?”
Victoria leaned toward Thomas and laid her hands on his. "Yes. Please. I must.”
Thomas nodded. "All right. You remember that meal when James and I were arguing about the war, the night before he joined the Army?”
“Yes. I will never forget it!”
“James had actually been planning on joining for a long time. He was joining because he found out I was in trouble and needed help. He thought the best way to help me was to join the Army, a very specific unit, so he could monitor how close they were getting to me.”
“I don’t understand. Why was the Army after you?”
“As you know, I am a freedom fighter. I have been helping families and individuals all through the North and South who are interested in helping runaway slaves get to a safe place. I have been part of this since before war broke out. Things were okay until the Army found out I had a family. Then they took my wife and children.”
Victoria’s eyes grew wide with shock. "But you are not married!”
“Not by any church my family would ever be caught dead in, no. I married a runaway slave. One of the first ones I helped get to Louisville. Along the way, Samira and I fell in love. She and I worked together quite often until she had our first child, then she remained in Louisville. The day before James joined up, I had just gotten word that she and my twin girls were arrested. James knew about Samira, and he wanted to help.”
“What did they do to Samira? Are your twins okay?” Victoria suddenly felt a great kinship with Thomas, and also a great pride in James. She had known none of this, and she was beginning to understand why.
Thomas continued after taking a deep breath. "Once James was established in his new unit, one of the other officers recognized the same last name. He started an inquiry of his own. James knew, of course, but he thought he was being careful as he tried to gain the confidence of the major who was leading the unit, which was specifically formed to find members of this underground railroad for the runaway slaves. I was pretty high on their list. James tried to keep his hands clean of the things that unit was doing, but the last time I saw him, he was truly shaken. He had witnessed two entire slave families hung up from trees, and was forced to take part in the execution of the family who had hidden them. James still wanted to help me, but by being part of that unit, he was being forced to be a monster.”
Victoria stared ahead in silence as she let this information sink in. She ran her hands over her round belly and tried to erase the images that flooded her imagination.
“The night James died...Victoria, are you sure you want to know this?”
Victoria could not look at Thomas, but she nodded as tears streamed down her face.
“That night, James was supposed to rendezvous with me. We were counting on the fact that we do not resemble each other in the slightest, so we planned on meeting at a local tavern. We were able to get seated at a corner table, and James told me what he knew about Samira and my girls. They were being held in the prison in Louisville, awaiting a convoy that would return Samira to her previous owner in Georgia. He told me the date and time, but he told me he had sent an order that he forged to delay the transfer. That transfer is supposed to take place in a week, which is why we are going to Louisville.”
Thomas took a deep breath, and Victoria glanced at him through her tears, realizing he too was crying. “Thank God, I was able to get all the details before the soldiers crashed into the tavern. I was bound along with James. They were beating him and yelling at him, calling him a traitor and a deserter. In all the commotion, I was able to undo my bindings, and when they got us outside, I broke free. I had no weapons on me, so I fought a few of them, but then a shot rang out. Two of the soldiers took off and left just me and the one who fired the shot still standing. The soldier stared at the man he had shot, and I realized it was James. I jumped at the man, wrestled his gun away from him, and knocked him out. As soon as I leaned over James, I realized it was over. The soldier had shot James in the back of the head. I wanted to take him with me, but the shot had caused more people to come out, and I heard the shouts of the soldiers returning, so I had to run...”
Thomas bowed his head for a moment and then with the back of one hand, he wiped his eyes. He turned his intense blue eyes and met Victoria’s, which were wide in shock and dismay.
“I am so sorry, Victoria. James died because of me.”
Victoria felt her grief wash over her all over again. Unable to keep eye contact with Thomas, she instead forced herself to look to the side as they traveled a dark road in the middle of the night. The fact that her husband had died trying to help Thomas and Samira made her proud. However, that he died so brutally and unjustly made her angry. While she knew she was a widow to a man she would consider a hero, he would forever be a traitor, and that was the actual truth from the perspective of the Southern mind. With that realization, Victoria knew as well that she would never return to Charleston. She could never call the place that took an honorable man's life “home.” She started to sob as the gravity of the situation truly hit her.
Thomas let Victoria work through her emotions and her thoughts. He wanted to beg her forgiveness, but he knew it was not the time. He was riddled with guilt. He should not have met James in such a public place. He should not have let James get involved in the first place. He never should have told James about Samira and the girls. Thomas knew in his gut, James’ death lay squarely at his feet. He doubted he would ever be able to forgive himself, but he hoped and prayed that in time, Victoria would.
***
Three days later, Simon stopped the wagon on a low rise and pointed to the town spread out before them.
“Louisville,” he announced.
Victoria, who had been resting in the wagon, peered up over the shoulders of the men, and took in the view.
“How on Earth...” she started, but Thomas gave her a sideways glance, and she stopped. Thomas had let on that he did not completely trust young Simon, so the boy still thought Thomas and Victoria were just passing through.
Simon signaled the horses to continue onward, and soon the three found themselves in the center of Louisville. After a while, Simon pulled the wagon to a halt in front of a hotel, and he hopped down. He grabbed his two bags from the back of the wagon. After hugging Victoria and shaking hands with Thomas, who paid him well for his help on the journey, Simon turned away and disappeared on the crowded street.
Thomas took Victoria’s bag from the wagon as well as one of his own and asked a porter from the hotel to take the wagon to the livery for the horses to be checked out and the wagon to be run over for a trip west. He then led Victoria into the hotel and reserved a room for them both. Victoria grew uneasy when he listed them as Mr. and Mrs. Bramwell, afraid someone might be looking for them there, but if Thomas was concerned, he did not show it. The clerk gave Thomas a key and directed them to a staircase.
Once in the room, Victoria realized there was only one bed and a hardback chair next to a curtained tub. She went to the washbasin, where hot water had just been poured, and after removing her bonnet, she dabbed at her face and neck with one of the washcloths. Thomas had said nothing after depositing their bags in a corner. He sat on the edge of the bed and stared out the window that overlooked the busy street.
Thomas stood up and looked out the window. “I need to make some inquiries. I need to find out where the prison is, and then I might need your help.”
“My help?”
“It might be possible to buy some slaves. If the offer is good enough, slaves are often sold here rather than returned to their owners down South. Unless the owner comes up in person to retrieve their slaves, there is not much they can do about it. So it happens here all the time. If that is the case with Samira and my girls, then you would be the one to go make the offer.”
Victoria sat hard on the chair, trepidation filling her gut. “I don’t know, Thomas. I...I just don’t think I am ready to get involved in something like this.”
Thomas looked down at the street and watched the people walking by, then he turned to Victoria. He went to her and knelt down, taking her hands in his. "Victoria, Samira is my wife. My girls are my whole world. I cannot go to get them; it has to be you. Please say you will help me.”
Kneeling as he was, he was still able to look Victoria in the eye evenly. Victoria tried to turn away, but the look in Thomas’ eyes drew her in. She felt a stirring and the trepidation disappeared. Afraid speaking out loud would betray what she was really feeling, she nodded. Thomas grinned, and Victoria felt like her world was crumbling all over again, and when he leaned forward and embraced her in a hug so tight she could barely breathe, she felt her heart break again. In that moment, she realized in shock and anger at herself, she had somehow fallen in love with Thomas. Suddenly disgusted with herself, Victoria stood up and went to her bag.
“Well, you better get going to get all the information,” she said to him with her back turned. “Stay gone for a while, I want to take a bath and wash off all this dust and grime.”
She did not turn, so she did not see the confusion on Thomas’ face at her sudden change in mood. She did not turn until she heard the heavy footfall as he walked to the door, opened it, and then gently shut behind him.
She turned to face the door and then threw herself on the bed, allowing her confusing emotions to run their course. She berated herself. How could she allow this to happen? Thomas was married. And on the run. And was involved in dangerous activities. And... He was just wonderful. Victoria sat up and dried her eyes. Thomas was wonderful, she thought, and that was why she needed to help him reunite with Samira and his daughters. Helping him was the best way to show him that she forgave him for his part in James’ death, even though she did not truly feel he was to blame at all.
With sudden determination, Victoria stood up and decided to really take that bath. Twenty minutes later, she was relaxing in the deep tub and thinking about what she would do once Thomas and Samira were back together. Keep going west, she thought to herself. Go west, and start over. That was the plan.
***
Two days later, Victoria, dressed in a fine gown, fancy shoes, and kid gloves, with an outrageous hat adorning her head, walked up the steps of the prison where Samira was supposedly being held for transfer. Thomas was not able to confirm Samira and his daughter were actually there, but he had it on good authority that all slaves waiting for transfers back to the south were housed within that prison’s tall walls. He and Victoria planned out every detail. He sold the horses, wagon, and all the supplies in order to have a tidy sum to offer for the three runaways. Meanwhile, Victoria found a dress shop where she purchased the attire she felt she needed to look the part of a well-to-do woman meeting her husband out West.
As she stepped inside the prison a slew of scents assaulted her, causing her to be nauseated. She placed a hand on her belly and took a deep breath to still her nerves. She saw two guards behind a desk staring at her in wonder, so she smiled brightly and approached them.
“Good afternoon!”
The men merely nodded at her.
“I wonder if you might be able to assist me?”
One of the men cleared his throat. "In what way, madam?”
Victoria placed her purse on the counter, letting the coins hit the counter hard enough to jingle a little. “I am in need of some servants to assist me as I travel west. I am not from here, you see, but a man at the hotel told me sometimes unclaimed slaves could be bought here?”
“Yes, ma’am, that is correct. However, that is typically only done on auction days.”
“I see. Well, when is the next auction?”
The man glanced at a paper calendar. “Not until next month, ma’am.”
Victoria stared at the man for a moment, "Well, that just won’t do. I leave in a few days, you see. I was really hoping I could find some decent help today.”