Read A Slow Burning Fire Online

Authors: J.F. Jenkins

A Slow Burning Fire (20 page)

Bringing the topic up was out of the question, though. Pride was getting in the way of her giving him a much-needed apology. She'd been wrong to cut him off and be so short during their last serious conversation. What she was waiting for was to figure out what was going on in his head exactly. Was he mad? Hurt? Frustrated? Sad? A combination of all those? Once she could determine how he would react to everything she wanted to say, then she'd be a little more confident to do the right thing. There was so much she needed to confess. If he was going to lash out and reject her, however, she didn't want to even bother.

As they walked to the fair, she glanced up at him. His eyes were the best place to start, in trying to see his true emotions. No matter what expression he wore on his face, what was really going on in his mind could be seen in those beautiful olive-green irises. Even when he acted, if his mind wasn't completely absorbed into the scene, she could see it and see what he was actually thinking. When she gazed up at him and studied his face, she was surprised to see him so… happy? Mischievous, too.
How odd.

Arial barely recognized Main Street as they walked through the town. Colorful banners and balloons lined the street, adorning light posts and columns of buildings. Venders of all kinds could be found, from homemade jewelry or jams to greasy food that would inspire her to do a thousand sit-ups later that night before bedtime. People bustled about everywhere, buying or hurrying to the end of the street where a police barricade was set up. That was where the stage for the talent show and other various events scheduled for entertainment was located. Near there was more food and a plethora of games and rides.

Bryce's eyes widened. “Wow.”

“Hmm?” she asked.

“This is cool.”

“You sound surprised, too.”

He gave a slight shrug. “I expected something a little less elaborate to match the low-key atmosphere. Gloriana isn't exactly buzzing, you know. This… this is wild!”

“Brings back memories.” She glanced at him and noticed he was wearing the same neon green and brown plaid that he had put on for the county fair they had gone to in California.
“Déjà vu.”

He thumbed the shirt with pride. “I told you this is my lucky shirt. It'll help me relax for the show tonight. Besides, I like making a fashion statement.”

“You're nervous, too?” she asked, lifting an eyebrow with curiosity. She couldn't remember the last time he'd been anything but calm and collected when it came to performing.

Bryce chuckled. “Are you kidding me? I can barely eat.”

“You wouldn't have struck me as the type to let things affect you that much.”

“Something about doing things live always gets me twisted up,” he explained. “There aren't any retakes. It's one shot and that's it. Plus my publicist didn't like that I sprung the whole thing on her without any real warning, not to mention that I didn't talk to her about it first. I have to do my own thing sometimes, and this is just for fun. She seems to think she needs to be involved. I can… take care of… myself…” His gaze went further down the road, and it didn't take Arial long to figure out where it had drifted. Near the police barricade was a handful of photographers. They certainly weren't in droves like in California, but there were more than she expected.

She recognized two local media personnel filming packages for the night's news. The rest were a mystery. Some could have been from local newspapers or paparazzi who flew in overnight to get a glimpse of a potential story. Either way, she wasn't prepared for any spontaneous interviews or fan outbreaks. Hopefully the police were prepared to deal with whatever might come their way.

“We should find a side entrance,” she suggested, tugging on his arm. “Did you even think about them wanting to talk to us?”

He nodded, following her casually to the other side of the street. There were more cars parked over there, fewer people, and a few large rides closer to the front that they could sneak around to get in. “I did, and all this week, I've been working on setting up a safe atmosphere for us as well as preparing just what I'm going to say. To be honest, I was kind of hoping for a little more media to be here. This is kind of disappointing.”

“Why? You know the townspeople here don't like all of the attention that comes with the paparazzi,” she said. Her eyes narrowed, and she was stunned. Did he not care about what everyone else needed? Gloriana was a small town that wanted to stay small.

Bryce's gaze lowered for a moment before shifting to meet hers. “They don't, but also notice how most of them are from the local news stations. Not a whole lot happens out this way, and that's fine, to a point. But talking with the people, hearing some of the gossip, I've noticed that this world is struggling. A little extra boost is what I was hoping for. Small town, yes, but I don't want to see it change into a ghost town.”

She held his gaze for a long time, wanting to trust him, to believe in him. She did not doubt his story, but she wasn't sure she was as convinced his plan would work. Time would tell if more of a crowd would be drawn to the fair.

“We have three hours to kill before we're supposed to meet for the show,” Bryce said. “How about we do something fun? Can't say I know the last time I've gone on a ride or eaten a mini-donut.”

“Same,” she said. “Think you can handle that kind of food right now? It won't make you sick, will it? You being so nervous and all that you can barely eat.” She was teasing him, smirking at him slightly.

Bryce snorted. “For a mini-donut, I would do a lot of things. They're one of my weaknesses, but don't tell anyone.”

“You have a weakness?” She mock gasped. “And here I thought that nothing could break you.”

“Which is why I don't want the secret to get out.” He winked. “Come on, let's go do something fun for a while. We can play a nice game of dodge the paps while we're at it.”

“Okay.” What she wanted to do was talk. For the time being, she'd humor him. It would probably be better if they didn't get into anything heated until after their performance. The talk would be emotional, there was no way around it, and it could ruin their entire relationship if she wasn't careful.
This isn't how the summer was supposed to go.

She'd imagined something so much tamer. They'd bond, but she was still surprised he’d stayed for so long, that he liked the farm so much. Even more so that he was able to show her how much she liked it there as well. Her small crush on him wasn't supposed to blossom into something so rich and full, and he wasn't supposed to hint that he might also love her, too. She wasn't supposed to forget about Los Angeles, or how to be careful with herself. Being on guard was a must in the business, and she'd broken that one cardinal rule the moment she stepped off the plane. As much as she tried to deny everything earlier in the summer, she'd still let herself fall for him and hard.

So now what?
she asked herself. And almost as if Bryce could read her mind, he took her hand in his own and walked her toward the games.

“Gonna win me a teddy bear?” she asked.

He smirked. “Win one, yes, but you're presumptuous to think it's going to you.”

Heat graced her cheeks. “Wishful thinking, I guess.”

****

“Oh, so you want me to win you a prize?” He raised an eyebrow. That was the last thing he was expecting to hear from her. He could tell that her guard was slowly starting to fall. The fear that had been present the other night on the phone was nowhere in sight. In general, she wasn't so on edge, and that helped him to relax more. He could show her the wonderful time he wanted to. Bryce would still have to tread carefully, but it would be done with more confidence.

Arial rolled her eyes and glanced his way. “I've never had a guy win me anything before, ever, not even as a friend. It's kind of one of those silly girlish fantasies of ours.”

“Why is that, anyway?” he wondered.

“We like that you want to impress us because it means you think about us,” she stated. “It's not so much about what we get, but that you want to give it. Don't you like to be the occupation of someone's mind?”

He had to think about that one for a moment. The depth of their conversation was a pleasant surprise. Perhaps she would do most of the work for him so he couldn't chicken out again. He reflected on a lot of things: Katie, and how badly he had wanted to be enough for her so that both of them could be happy; his family, and he'd wanted so many of the same things with them, too. Why weren't they able to see how much he desired to be 'it' for them all?

Laughing, he shook his head. “Everyone wants to feel important to the people they love. I think men go about it in a different way than women, but the end result is still the same. It's a shame you haven't ever had someone win you a prize, though. Then again, your choice in men has always been a little… um… interesting.”

****

Arial's cheeks grew even hotter than before. Why did she have to say something and start this whole thing up? “It took me a while to figure out what kind of a guy I was into. A few of them weren't all that bad. They're just impatient, and I don't think they understand me. Besides, it's hard to do things like this with your significant other when they're on the other side of the world.”

“You make time,” Bryce shrugged. “Maybe if they'd spent more time planning a real date instead of trying to get into your pants, you'd have more pleasant memories to look back on. You know how people always say don't give the milk away without having bought the cow or whatever? Well, my mom told me to make sure I earned the milk. Whether I buy the cow or not, I need to work for what I'm getting, be worthy of it. Because handouts do nobody any favors. The work is what makes the payout awesome. People don't work enough at their relationships.”

“Some people don't know when to quit either.” She gave him a pointed look.

He waved a hand at her, rolling his eyes. “Because I invested a lot into the whole thing, I'd rather fight until my last breath than quit too soon and never know. I've already admitted to staying longer than I should have. I was scared. We both were. I can accept that now. Now I've learned something from the whole thing.”

“But you tried and exhausted all of your options, too,” she said softly. There was something admirable about that. He was right; too many people did quit too soon. All of his talk about earning intimacy was sweet as well. How did he ever become such an old soul and so level-headed? So few people anywhere thought like him. Sometimes when it was just the two of them, she could swear they had been sent back to another time where the ideals they both shared were still acceptable. Nowadays, it felt like too many people were seeking immediate self-gratification over long-term joy. It disheartened her.

Bryce's gaze moved off her, and he stared straight in front of him. “Exhausted is a good word to use. Love is a lot of work, but it shouldn't be exhausting. It's gotta be like that adrenaline rush. It pushes you forward, gives you that high, and then when you're done, you feel tired but satisfied. You don’t dread it or feel beaten.”

“Agreed. Glad to be on the same page,” she said.

“I bet we're on a lot more than just one of them.”

“Huh?”

“You said you were glad to be on the same page. I think we agree on a lot more than just one page's worth of stuff. We could probably print a whole book.”

She laughed. “You and your cheesy metaphors.”

“Cheesy, yes, but I bet you'll never look at a book the same way again.” He winked and stepped ahead of her, waving for her to follow. “Speaking of cheese, I think we need to ride on the Ferris wheel. Can't get any more clichéd than that, but it's kind of necessary.”

“And why's that?”

He flashed her a bright and mischievous grin. “Because I said so. Why do you want me to divulge all of my secrets all of a sudden? Can't I maintain some of my mystery still?”

“I'm interpreting that as meaning you don't have a good reason. You want to be silly and kiddish just because you can,” she teased.

“Gotta have fun somehow!” He shrugged rather innocently, but there was something present in his eyes as well that suggested that wasn't the whole truth. Bryce did have a reason, but it wasn't one he was going to share.

I hope you know what you're doing.
Arial followed him to the Ferris wheel, happy to get it out of the way first. She didn't like heights and was only going on it to humor him. The rocking of the buckets always made her nervous, like she might tumble out and fall to her death. That fear was instilled in her by her mother at an early age. If Bryce wanted to ride it, however, and live out some kind of boyish fantasy of his, she didn't want to be the one to deny him. Besides, being afraid of falling would distract her from the nerves of debuting one of her own songs in front of everyone.

Bryce got tickets from the booth. He wasn't even trying to shield his identity. While they waited in line, she was amazed at how easily the two of them did blend in. Neither of them looked like their usual selves. Townsfolk came up and said hello to Bryce, greeting her as well out of polite obligation. No sunglasses dropped over his eyes, or even a simple hat. She admired his ability to walk around as if he belonged. Then again, he did, so much more so than she. It wasn't fair, and no one they passed seemed to make the connection. Either that, or they didn't care. Would her hometown care that he was a celebrity, too? They had to know something was going on. It made sense that she would bring back a famous friend from California to visit, wouldn't it? Why had she stupidly thought that nobody knew anything?

“Relax,” he said and gave her shoulder a squeeze. Arial did as she was told. If he wasn't worried about being harassed by fans or paparazzi, then she wouldn't be either. When it was their turn to get on, he handed over their tickets and then helped her into the small bucket seat of the Ferris wheel. Immediately when the door was closed on them, she gripped his arm.

She glanced up at him sheepishly, positive she was blushing. How could she not be? The whole thing was embarrassing.

“I don't like heights,” she mumbled.

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