A Newport Christmas Wedding (6 page)

Space to understand things, time to think things through, and most of all she needed to talk to someone who wasn't caught up in the drama, who had no other motives than to be a friend. After all, wasn't that what a bridesmaid and best friend were for?

She needed to talk to Carlyn. She could be back before they were even awake.

Still, she felt her world begin to crumble as she drove away.

 

Chapter 7

A
S SOON AS
they got near Gran's the next morning, Nora knew something was wrong. More wrong then they had been the night before.

“Where's Meri's car?”

Her dad shrugged, but didn't look away from the empty parking area at the front of the farmhouse where Meri usually parked.

“Where is she?” Nora asked again when they got out of the car. She was beginning to panic, something terrible might have happened. Why had she ever started this?

She'd tried to do the right thing. Tried to think of somebody but herself, and she'd even screwed that up. Big-­time. Like always.

“Maybe she parked around the side of the house,” she said, answering her own question.

Her dad nodded as he walked toward the house.

“Or she might have run out to the market for Gran.”

He nodded again, but Nora noticed he was walking faster.

It was everything she could do not to break into a run. Instead she crossed her fingers inside her mittens and prayed,
Please let everything be okay, please let everything be okay.

Her dad was the first through the door. He didn't stop in the mudroom to take off his boots or coat, just marched into the kitchen.

Gran was standing at the sink. “There was an emergency at Gilbert House.”

“When did she leave?”

“Early. I didn't hear her go.”

Nora hung back in the mudroom, slowly unbuttoning her coat. She wanted to feel relief, even though it was bad if something happened to Meri's ceiling. But at least that meant that she hadn't left them. Only Gran didn't sound like she believed it.

“Where's Nora this morning?”

Nora stepped out of the mudroom. “I'm here.”

“Well, take off your coat and hat and mittens and come have some breakfast.”

Nora wasn't hungry. Actually, she felt like she might throw up. But she took off her things, hung the coat up, and dropped her hat and mittens in the basket on the boot shelf.

She stepped inside of the kitchen. “Did she say when she'd be back?” Her voice came out all weird, and Gran gave her a funny look.

“No, she left a note.”

“Did she call?” Now her dad was sounding wary. It made her feel really icky. Like something even worse was going to happen.

“No,” Gran said. “Nora, honey. I think I left the note in my room. Could you go get it please so your father can see it.”

Nora went straight to the door. But instead of going down the hall to Gran's room, she pressed against the wall, out of sight, and listened. She knew they were just getting rid of her so they could talk.

Sure enough there was silence for a few seconds, then her dad said, “What the hell is going on around here? What did her note really say?”

“It said there was an emergency. I tried calling her cell, but it went to voice mail. It may just mean she's busy. But . . . I didn't expect this. I told her we would all talk about it in the morning.”

“Dammit.”

“Shh. I don't want Nora to overhear and be more upset.”

Nora shoved her fist against her mouth. Gran thought it was all her fault. And it was.

“You need to remain calm. Women are bound to be nervous before their wedding day. And now with Nora saying she's moving out, I'm afraid Meri thinks she's the reason. And this is just a guess, but from what she said in the car last night, she thinks Nora and Lucas are afraid they'll lose you to her.”

“That's crazy. They love her. She's always been a part of us. She's half the reason I got the kids back.”

“Well, there's a lot of murky nonsense going on.”

Nora heard the chair creak. Her dad must have sat down.

“What the hell happened?” Her dad's voice. “I must have been living in fairy tales too long, to actually think I could finally have my children and the woman I've always loved under the same roof. Silly me.”

“Sarcasm doesn't help,” Gran said.

“Then tell me what will.”

Nora slipped away. Ran to Gran's room. The note was on the dresser. She sat down on the bed and read.

There's an emergency at Gilbert House. Have to go back. I'll call you when I know more
.

That sounded believable. Maybe there really was an emergency. Nora folded the note and carried it back to the kitchen.

Her father was just putting down his phone.

“Did you get her?” Nora asked.

“I left a message.”

Nora handed him the note. He read it, then just held it in his hand.

“Sit down, Nora, you'll have to have cereal this morning if you're going to make the bus.”

“I'm not going to school. There's no reason to.”

“There's plenty of reason to. Especially if you want to catch up with students back in New Haven.”

“I'll be fine, Dad. I'm not going to school.”

“I think we could all use a day off.” Gran crossed to the fridge. “And we're going to start with a healthy breakfast. Something tells me we're all going to need it.”

“Gran, can Nora stay with you? I'm going into Newport. It's stupid to sit here and wonder what's going on. And I certainly don't want her to be away long enough to talk herself out of marrying me.”

“G
IRLFR
IEND, YOU ARE
totally nuts.” Carlyn handed her a mug of steaming coffee. “The man is totally into you, Nora loves you, Lucas is away at school most of the time, and when he's here you get along, right?”

Meri drew her hands out of her jacket pockets to stir her coffee. They were the only two at Gilbert House that morning, so Carlyn hadn't bothered to turn up the heat. It was set at a steady sixty-­two, warm enough to protect the renovation but not enough to be comfortable.

Meri had arrived at the crack of dawn to an empty house. She didn't want to go to her apartment. She didn't want to wake Carlyn up, so she'd sat in the parking lot alternately turning on the engine to warm the car then turning it off until it got too cold to think.

Not that any of her thinking was doing much good.

“I know Alden does. I love him, too. Totally. And the kids, too. And they like me, at least I think they do. But I don't think they want me to marry their father. You have to look at it from their perspective.

“They were treated like unloved stepchildren with Jennifer and Mark, and they finally come back to Corrigan House only to have their dad decide to get married.”

“So you can all live happily ever after together,” Carlyn said.

“Well, I think they may be afraid that they'll be stuck in the same situation again. That they'll lose him. To me.”

Meri took a sip of coffee, put the mug down. “What went wrong? We were all looking forward to the wedding and now everyone is upset. If I'm wrecking the fragile relationship Alden has with his children, I would rather not marry him.

“Maybe it would be better if we just let things go on as they are now.”

“And what are they?” Carlyn asked.

“You know, snatching time together when we can. Not making anything official.”

Carlyn yawned and rolled her eyes to let Meri know what she thought about that scenario.

“That way they won't feel as threatened.”

“You know, for a smart person . . . First of all, Nora may be a little self-­centered, I mean she's a teenager for crying out loud. She's supposed to be the center of her universe. But she's almost eighteen and will most likely be gone in the next year.”

“Which would be a perfect time to get married.”

“Provided neither of you has been hit by a bus during that time.”

“Jeez, Carlyn.”

“Seize the day, girl.”

“Would you do it? Marry someone if his kids didn't want you to?”

“Sure I would. I'd bulldoze right over them to the I do's.”

Meri laughed in spite of herself. “You are so full of it.”

“Well, did you two sit down and give them the blended family talk?”

Meri took a sip of coffee. “No. I mean, it never occurred to us. Nora's announcement came out of the blue last night. She might not even have told us if we hadn't overheard it.”

“Yeah, that was kind of weird. Passive aggressive maybe.”

“You mean she wanted us to know how she felt without having to tell us outright?”

Carlyn shrugged.

Meri's cell phone rang. She glanced at it, but let it ring.

“How many times has he called?”

“Three. Maybe four.”

“Jeez, put the man out of his misery and answer. Tell him the ceiling is fine, it was a false alarm and you're coming home. It's not fair not to at least tell him what you're feeling.”

“You're right.” She reached for the phone. It stopped ringing.

Carlyn's cell started up with the theme from
Star Wars.

Meri looked a question at her.

“Doug,” Carlyn said. “I'll give you your privacy.” She left the room.

Meri looked at the phone. Maybe she'd been hasty. No she hadn't. It wasn't just about what
she
wanted. They should all sit down and talk reasonably about what was best for them all.

But she was afraid that would not include her. Afraid that if she picked up the phone, he would say, My children come first. And they would break up, like she and Peter did. Though with Peter she knew it was the right thing to do.

Over the years, she and Alden had had their shares of fights and periods of being on the outs. But this would be the final one. It would mean she wasn't important enough to him.

Maybe it was better to get it over. She picked up the phone, made the call. It went to voice mail and she hung up, hurt and heartsick, but just a little relieved.

Carlyn came back into the room.

“Everything all right with Doug?”

“Huh? Yeah, just needed to check some figures. The man never stops working.”

“Neither do you,” Meri said.

“Well, I am taking the rest of the morning off. You and I are going for a walk.”

“A walk? Where?”

“The cliff walk. Good for the body and the soul. And we haven't been in weeks.”

“Because it's December and freezing.”

“Well, you'll have to toughen up if you're going to end up a lonely old lady living over the deli with a hundred cats.”

“You're so not funny.”

Carlyn pulled her earmuffs over her ears and started on her gloves.

“Chop chop.” Carlyn waited with her hands on her hips. “And if by some stupid reason you're still here tonight, I'll treat you to a burger at Mike's.”

Meri stood up and followed her out the door. “You're going to freeze in that jacket.”

“Not me.”

“Carlyn, I'm really not up for this.”

“Too bad. Sitting around all mopey and nobody-­loves-­me isn't good for the circulation. Now, put a smile on it.” She practically pushed Meri into the car.

Carlyn parked near the Memorial Boulevard entrance of the cliff walk. “I figure we'll start here and stop for coffee when we get back. A little reward for our trouble.”

“I'm not exactly dressed for the inn.”

“Don't worry about it.”

They took a minute to stretch, though neither was dressed for serious walking.

“Are you sure we need to do this? “ Meri groused. “I'll probably get blisters.”

But one gust of wind convinced her that the faster they walked, the sooner they would be sitting inside over double lattes and maybe a basket of pastries.

They'd walked for ten minutes, their breath huffing out in white clouds like old steam engines, when Carlyn suddenly stopped. “This was a dumb idea. I'm freezing. Let's go back.”

“Told you so,” Meri said, and then had to run to catch up to Carlyn, who was speed-­walking back in the direction they'd come.

That was fine with her, a double latte at the end of the walk was pretty strong incentive to keep up the pace.

They made it back to the entrance in record time.

And Meri saw the real reason Carlyn had suddenly changed her mind about walking.

“Did you plan this?”

“Yep.

“That wasn't Doug on the phone?”

“Nope.”

“Not fair. You're supposed to be my friend.”

“And your bridesmaid, and I'm not going to let you blow this because of some misplaced altruism which probably doesn't mean squat. Now you tell the man exactly what you're feeling and why, and for crying out loud, try to work things out.

“This is the first bridesmaid dress I've ever had that actually looks good on me, and I intend to wear it.” She veered off the path and with a quick wave cut across the lawn to the parking lot.

And Meri was left looking at the uncompromising face of her hopefully soon-­to-­be bridegroom.

 

Chapter 8

M
ERI DIDN'T HESITAT
E,
but walked toward him. She'd thought she'd need time and space to sort things out, but just seeing him told her everything she already knew. All that cornball stuff about a person being the other half of you, of completing you. It was true.

She hadn't known before that there was a little emptiness inside her. If she ever questioned it, she thought it was because of her birth. But now she knew. That piece she needed was standing right in front of her.

And she walked into his arms like she had hundreds of times before. For thirty years she'd been coming home and she never realized it fully. Not even the past summer, when she finally admitted that she loved him, was in love with him.

His arms closed around her. No questions, just acceptance. Like always. She knew she owed him an explanation, and that would come soon enough, but for now she held on for dear life.

“There was no emergency at Gilbert House.”

“No,” she said into his jacket.

“Didn't think so.”

They stood on the path while time winked out, until Alden rested his cheek on her hair. “Can we go home now?”

Meri just wanted to stand there. But that was crazy. “I love you totally, but I'm . . . I'm . . .”

“Afraid.”

Of course he knew. She nodded.

“Can we at least go inside, my ears are turning to popsicles.”

Meri chuckled. “Coffee at my place?”

M
ERI LET THEM
inside. They'd been pretty much silent on the ride to her apartment. It never did any good to try to talk to Alden when he was driving or working. And what she needed to say, needed to ask, deserved face-­to-­face time.

And since Alden was never chatty at the best of times, she spent the time looking out the window of decorated Newport. Normally, she relished driving through the town at Christmastime. The town was at its festive best and the streets were crowded with visitors coming to see the mansions all decked out.

She always went to at least one every year. The mansions, when decorated, went a step further than just the return of a certain age. They showed the possibility, the human element, that was sometimes missing in the daily tours.

The ­people who built these mansions might not always have been the nicest or most sympathetic of ­people. But they celebrated and grieved just like everyone else.

That's what she liked about Gilbert House. It would never be as fabulous as the Breakers, or Rosecliff or Marble House. It was smaller, earlier, and had seen many generations of ­people from all walks of life. You could feel their presence in the very wood and tile of the house. Could walk the same steps as someone over a hundred years before. It was neat. She loved it.

That's the first thing she and Alden had talked about when they decided to get married.

How would they juggle two households, because she intended to work.

It had never occurred to him that she wouldn't work. She glanced over at his stark profile, eyes forward and mind who knew where. On the traffic, probably—­or in some dark cavern or aerie fairy palace.

She loved him so much. He was such a part of her that she couldn't imagine life without him. Well, she'd never had to, had she? He'd always been there. He'd been all things to her during her thirty years and now he would be her husband—­or not.

She closed her eyes, leaned her head back against the headrest.

“Tired?”

“I didn't sleep much.”

“Strange, neither did I.”

“I know.”

He cut a look at her before retuning to the street.

“I saw you out on the rocks,” she said.

“Why didn't you come to me instead of hying off to Newport?”

“I don't know. You looked so angry. And I didn't know what to say or how to fix it.”

“I wasn't angry. Okay maybe I was angry, but not at you.”

“At Nora?”

“I'm a little pissed at Nora. Mainly I was just angry at the fates that were suddenly playing fast and loose with our future.”

Meri smiled at him.

“I know, I think I'm a little crazy, too.”

“You're not crazy at all. You're the love of my life. Look, someone's coming out of a space up there.”

“Miracle of miracles. I wasn't relishing driving around forever trying to find a parking space while trying not to start a conversation until we could just talk with no interruptions.”

“Me neither.”

He pulled alongside the recently vacated spot and backed in.

“Pretty impressive how you squeezed this big car into that little space.”

“I had incentive.”

“Coffee?”

He shook his head, amused. “Get out.”

They walked up the sidewalk arm in arm, and if Meri's stomach hadn't been bouncing around like a free radical, she would have enjoyed the walk.

Though she did calm down as they turned into her apartment building , an old house converted into apartments that was in walking distance of just about everything but the mansions.

As soon as they were inside, Alden threw his jacket on the couch arm and went into her little kitchen to make coffee. Meri began to get nervous again. Usually he hung his coat up in the closet, so maybe he just really needed coffee. Or was he planning for a quick getaway?

Meri picked it up and hung up both their coats. She came up behind him and put her arms around his waist while he watched the coffee carafe.

“I'm taking it that it isn't me you're upset with?” he asked.

She rested her head against his back. “I'm not upset at anyone. Just suddenly I'm not sure about what we're doing.”

He turned and put both arms around her. “Because Nora wants to go live with her mother?”

“Why? She never said anything about it. I thought she was totally on board with the wedding. She's been over at Gran's every day making plans. We were going shopping on Saturday. What happened?”

The coffee beeped and he got two mugs down from the cabinet. “She said it was no big deal, that school was boring and she wanted to graduate with her friends in New Haven.”

“Did you believe her?”

“Not really, but why else would she want to go home? She knows you and I and Gran love her and want her here.”

“Are you sure she knows?”

“Aren't you?”

“No,” Meri said. “I'm not sure of anything suddenly. Here Nora is suddenly leaving home, and I think it's because of me.”

“Don't be ridiculous. She loves you.”

“As somebody she hangs out with occasionally. But what about being like a parent? What if I mess up? She could have told me what was bothering her but she didn't. What if she needs help and I miss the cues. And—­”

“Stop it.” He had been about to hand her a mug, but put it down on the counter. Took her shoulders, squeezed them. “You don't have to be a mother. To Nora or Lucas or even to whatever might come down the road. And Nora is smart enough to know we both love her.”

“Now maybe, but what if they come to resent me for taking you away from them?”

“What kind of television have you been watching?”

“I just don't want to come between the three of you. They've lived so long without you, now Nora's willing to go back to a place she hated, what else could it be? Why didn't I just ask her what she was feeling? I just took it for granted she was as happy as I was.”

“She was. I'm sure of it.”

“Then what happened? What did she say last night?”

“What I just told you about school, and she refused to go to school today. I didn't argue but left her with Gran. Maybe she'll talk some sense into her.”

“What about Lucas, he hasn't even been around?”

“He'll cope, he always does. He was fine with it when we told him. Later, he told me he thought it was a good idea, since Nora would be leaving soon and he thought I should have someone to keep me company. I felt ancient.” He smiled slowly. “For about a second, then, I thought of you keeping me company and I was myself again.”

“Maybe we should just stay like we are.”

“And what is that?”

“You know . . . this.”

“Standing in your kitchen while our coffee gets cold listening to you talking nonsense?”

“It doesn't feel like nonsense.”

“I know. I didn't mean to make light of it. I've waited my whole life to have my family together. And now I'm close. I'm nervous, too.”

“I'm not even your family.”

“Of course you are. I knew from the moment I saw you that you were mine.” He grinned. “Those pink little toes, that soft baby bum.”

“Stop it.” He made her laugh, and this was too serious to laugh about.

“Now it's just a question of making it legal.”

“But what if it isn't even legal?”

“Dammit, Meri. Are you looking for impediments? It's legal enough for me. But if you're looking for a way out, just say so.”

“No. I'm not. I just want it to be perfect.”

He huffed out a sigh. “Right now, I just want it to be. Come on, you've never been a fraidy cat before.”

She felt a smile start but wasn't sure it if would lead to laughter or tears. “What if we end up getting a divorce and hate each other?”

“We've had fights before, we've always found our way back, we will again.”

“But—­”

Alden moved away. “No more buts. Either you love me and want to marry me or you don't. You decide. But Meri, this is it. If you decide you don't want me, it's forever. I won't be coming back. I'm finished with waiting.”

She stared at him.

He brushed past her, went straight to the coat closet and yanked his coat off the hanger.

Meri found her voice. “Alden. Stop. What are you doing?” She hurried toward him, but he already had his hand on the doorknob.

“Alden, you know I love you.”

“Then make a decision.”

“But what about Nora?”

He didn't answer, just opened the door, then slammed it as he left.

“W
HERE IS HE?
Why aren't they answering their phones?” Nora placed her own cell phone on the kitchen table and stared at it. She felt like breaking the stupid thing, but it cost big bucks and maybe Meri or her dad would call. It was already dark and no one had called.

“Gran? Can't you do something?”

Gran shook her head. “It's in their hands. But I think you should tell your dad what you've told me.”

Nora crossed her arms on the table and buried her head. “I should never have come. He was happy until I showed up.”

“Nora. Cut this nonsense out at once. You're not responsible for anything except having really poor timing and not trusting your father and Meri enough to tell them what your fears were.”

Nora peered up at Gran. “I was trying to do the right thing.”

“I know you were. You were going to sacrifice living here so you wouldn't be in the way. And the fact that you could even think that way makes me want to smack your mother. Though I know I shouldn't say that. But so help me she makes me angry.

“And furthermore you won't be going back there at any cost. Consequences indeed. You can live here if you don't want to live with Meri and Alden, but you're not going back to that house.”

“But I really do want to live with Dad and Meri.”

“Then tell them so.”

“What if it's too late?” Nora waited for Gran to tell her that it was never too late to make things right, but she didn't. She didn't say anything.

Gran was looking out the window. “If it is, we'll think of something else.”

Just then a light flashed in the through the window. They both ran to the kitchen door. The SUV was bouncing over the track that led to the farm.

“Do you see Meri? Is she with him?”

Gran craned her neck. “I can't see. Go sit down. And stay calm.”

“You don't see her, do you?”

“Nora, sit down and control yourself. We've had quite enough excitement for one day.”

It took forever before Nora heard the car door slam, the back door open and close. And her dad walked in—­alone.

Nora forgot she was supposed to be calm.

“Where is she?”

“In Newport.”

Gran reached into the cabinet and brought out a wineglass that she filled and put on the table. She kept her eyes on Alden.

“Why didn't she come back?”

“She said she needed to think.”

“It's because of me saying I was going to live with mom, isn't it?”

“That was just the catalyst.”

“I'm sorry.” She glanced at Gran.

“Go on and tell him what you told me.”

“I don't want to live in New Haven.”

“Then why the hell did you—­”

“Alden, listen to your daughter, and hear her out before you interrupt again.”

Alden sat down, laced his fingers and rested his hands on the kitchen table like a dutiful student.

­“People kept asking me if I would be going back to Mom after you and Meri got married. They thought it was weird that you'd want me to stay.”

“What ­people?”

“Alameda from the gift shop, and some of the girls at the shower were surprised that I was staying. They all thought you two would want to be alone.”

“For Chr—­”

“Alden.” Gran shook her finger at him.

“So I called Lucas and he had all these statistics about . . . stuff. You know, like divorces and starting new families, and he said it would be just like living with Mark and Mom once you and Meri . . . got married and started—­” She blushed, she couldn't help it. “You know. Your own family. Lucas doesn't act like he's living in this world, but he is, and he's a lot smarter than I am.”

“So Lucas doesn't want us to get married?”