A Mother's Trust (21 page)

The snow had melted, turning first to dirty slush on the pavements and then filling the gutters to overflowing with muddy water. It was almost impossible
to
get to the theatre without being sprayed by the wheels of passing vehicles, and the grey skies seemed to cast gloom over everyone. The show was due to close at the end of the month and Caspar had not managed to achieve a future booking. Phoebe was still plucking up the courage to tell him that she would be leaving for London at the beginning of March. She had saved as much as she could after paying rent to Judy and the small amount of money that Ivy Oakes demanded for nursing the baby. The remainder of her wages would help see them through the coming weeks until the family returned to England, but she would still have to supplement their income with a few séances. Quite how she would explain Edward’s arrival to her family was still a matter of deep concern to her, and it was discussed at length in the house. Madame Galina was convinced that little Teddy, as he had become known, ought to be adopted by a well-to-do family who could give him a solid upbringing and a good education. Herbert was of the opinion that there were suitable institutions for infants born on the wrong side of the blanket, but Gussie disagreed. She had been raised in an orphanage and she was vehement in her condemnation of such establishments. Fred sided with Madame, saying that the child’s best interests would be served if he remained in Brighton where Judy could keep an eye on his progress. Judy did not seem too keen on this suggestion. ‘I am not maternally inclined,’ she said firmly. ‘He should go to London with his sister.’

‘Come, come, my dear lady.’ Fred’s eyes were filled
with
admiration as he gazed at her. ‘You are a woman above reproach who understands the meaning of the word duty. Your conscience would not allow you to neglect a helpless infant, especially one related to you.’

Judy curled her lip and changed the subject to demand his overdue rent.

Phoebe listened politely but she had no intention of abandoning her responsibilities. She loved Teddy unreservedly and for good or ill she would stand by him for the rest of her life, no matter what other people said. Rose agreed with her wholeheartedly although Dolly appeared to be slightly put out by the attention the baby was receiving. She had become quiet and withdrawn since Annie died, and made no secret of the fact that she resented Ivy’s presence in the house, day and night. With a husband who had mysteriously disappeared from the scene before she gave birth to their child, and no family of her own, Ivy was only too glad to be fed and housed. She asked for little and faded into the shadows when her services were not required, but she had proved to be a good nursemaid and lavished the affection she might have given to her own baby on Teddy. Phoebe felt quite safe leaving him in her care when she was at the theatre, but she had still not told Caspar about the baby, and he had never mentioned her mother’s tragic demise. Caspar, she decided, lived in a self-centred world of his own. His act was the reason for his existence and the people around him were only important if they were some way involved in the illusory world he inhabited. Phoebe played her part to the best of her ability, but
after
his sudden and unexpected embrace, she was careful not to be alone with him.

‘You have to tell him that you’re leaving him,’ Rose said on the penultimate evening of the show as Phoebe was putting on her stage makeup. ‘He told me that he’s got a booking in Bournemouth starting next week.’

‘He hasn’t said anything to me.’ Phoebe patted her face with a powder puff. ‘As far as I know he’s still looking.’

‘You’ve been avoiding him off stage. You’ve made that obvious to everyone. Has he upset you in some way, Phoebe? I thought you two got on quite well, even though he is a difficult man.’

‘No. You’re imagining things, Rose. I have to hurry home every day because of Teddy, you know that.’

‘Yes.’ Rose eyed her doubtfully. ‘I suppose so. But you must say something. You can’t just walk out of the theatre tomorrow night and not tell him that you’re off to London next day.’

Phoebe patted her hand. ‘Stop worrying. I’ll do it in my own good time. He’ll find someone else to fill my place. After all, it didn’t take him long to hire me after Hyacinth left to marry her rich gentleman friend. I doubt if he’ll raise an eyebrow when I tell him.’ She spoke with more confidence than she was feeling, and although she intended to break the news to Caspar that evening after the performance ended, she lost her nerve and left the theatre before he had had time to change out of his magician’s robes.

It had been a difficult few days at home. Dolly and Ivy had clashed openly for the first time and Dolly
had
thrown herself down on the kitchen floor, flailing her arms and legs and howling like a frustrated two-year-old in a tantrum. Phoebe had been powerless to stop her but Judy had yanked Dolly to her feet and slapped her face just hard enough to bring her back to her senses. Then to Phoebe’s amazement Judy had wrapped her arms around Dolly and given her a hug, smoothing her tumbled blonde curls and speaking to her in gentle tones quite different from her habitual brusque manner.

Ivy snatched up the squalling baby and backed away to sit in a chair at the far end of the kitchen, unbuttoning her now spotlessly clean blouse to reveal an engorged breast. Latching on greedily, Teddy was silenced instantly, apart from the occasional muffled hiccup. Ivy sat quietly suckling him, watching Judy wide-eyed. ‘It weren’t my fault, Miss Phoebe,’ she muttered. ‘I only said I was looking forward to seeing London. I ain’t never been no further than Hove, and that were only once.’

Dolly lifted her head from Judy’s shoulder. ‘I don’t want to go back there. Ma will get me for sure, and I don’t like her.’ She pointed at Ivy and burst into fresh floods of tears.

Judy met Phoebe’s anxious gaze, shaking her head. ‘You’ll have to take Ivy with you for Teddy’s sake, but Dolly could stay here with me, for the time being anyway. She’s a great help in the house, and if that mother of hers decided to claim her there wouldn’t be much you could do to stop her taking Dolly back, and selling her to the highest bidder.’

Phoebe looked from one to the other. She was fond of Dolly, but Teddy must come first. ‘What do you say to that, Dolly? Would you like to stay with Judy?’

Dolly brightened visibly. ‘Yes, please.’

That settled, Phoebe knew that she must tell Caspar at the end of the evening performance. She had put it off repeatedly, but when the time came she waited until after the final curtain when everyone filed off the stage. The tumblers had invited everyone to go to the pub for a farewell drink, but Caspar had refused in his usual curt manner. He went straight to his dressing room and closed the door. Phoebe followed him. Standing outside she took a deep breath, knocked and went in.

He had taken off his velvet, star-spangled robe and was hanging it over the back of a chair. His vivid stage makeup was at odds with the white silk evening shirt which he had unbuttoned almost to his waist. ‘Yes?’ His tone was cold and his eyes disturbingly blank.

Phoebe clasped her hands tightly behind her back. ‘I’m leaving for London tomorrow.’ She tried to sound positive but she was suddenly nervous. ‘I’m sorry, Caspar. I can’t work with you any more.’

‘Why not? Is there someone else? Have you had a better offer?’ He took a step towards her, his eyes glittering dangerously. ‘Who is he?’

‘No. You don’t understand. My family – I …’

‘You’re not leaving me.’ It was a statement of fact rather than a question, and before she had a chance to move away he seized her in his arms. ‘You won’t get away from me so easily.’ With one savage swipe of his
hand
he ripped her sequined costume, burying his face between her breasts. His mouth was hot on her flesh, his teeth grazed her nipples, and before she had a chance to scream for help he pinned her against the door, covering her lips with brutal kisses. ‘You’ll never leave me,’ he whispered. ‘You belong to me alone. I’ll never let you go.’ His hands raked her flesh as he tore away the remaining gaudy trappings of a magician’s assistant. She struggled frantically but he silenced her cries with his tongue, half suffocating her with the weight of his body against hers. She kicked out with her feet but this only seemed to excite him more. His strength seemed like that of a madman intent on satisfying his lust. In desperation she bit his lip, drawing blood. Uttering an oath he clamped his hand to the afflicted part of his face and Phoebe opened her mouth to scream, but even before the sound escaped her lips there was a loud knocking on the door.

‘Are you coming to the pub, old man?’ Herbert’s voice rang out loud and clear, echoing round the dressing room.

An angel’s chorus could not have sounded sweeter to Phoebe’s ears. ‘Herbert, save me.’ She gave Caspar a hefty shove, catching him momentarily off guard, and she kicked him on the shin, causing him to stagger backwards. She wrenched the door open and fell into Herbert’s arms.

‘My God, Phoebe. What has he done to you?’ He lifted her off her feet and set her down in the narrow corridor. At that moment, Caspar emerged from the room, glowering at him as if he were about to commit
murder
. ‘Marcus,’ Herbert roared. ‘Come here. You’re needed.’

‘What is it, Poppa?’ Rose came running towards them. She stopped, staring at Phoebe in horror. ‘My God, Phoebe. What happened to you? Are you hurt?’

‘Take her to her dressing room, Rose.’ Herbert gave Phoebe a gentle push into his daughter’s arms. ‘We’ll deal with this.’ He glanced over his shoulder as Marcus approached them with a worried look on his face.

Clutching her torn costume to cover her naked breasts, Phoebe allowed Rose to lead her to the dressing room where she collapsed onto a wooden chair in front of the dressing table. She caught sight of her reflection in the mirror and found herself staring at a face covered in a mask of smudged greasepaint, both hers and Caspar’s. Her neck and breasts were striped black and silver, with smudges of red from his lips. She shuddered and turned away, reaching for a towel. ‘Fetch me some water, please,’ she whispered. ‘I want to wash this away.’ Her hands shook as she scrubbed at her flesh as if trying to scrape away all trace of what had just occurred.

‘Yes, of course. I’ll be back in a jiffy.’ Rose whisked out of the room, returning a few minutes later with a jug of hot water and a piece of soap. She smiled grimly as she lathered the sponge. ‘This is his fine soap. Only the best for Caspar, the old devil. He didn’t hurt you, did he, Phoebe? I can’t believe he would lay a finger on you for all his arrogance and ill temper.’

‘I’m not hurt.’ Phoebe took the sponge from her and scrubbed her face and neck until all traces of makeup were gone. ‘He frightened me, Rose. He kissed me and
I
really think he would have raped me if your pa hadn’t turned up in the nick of time.’

Rose shuddered. ‘To think that I fancied him once.’

‘I shouldn’t have agreed to work with him. I was stupid.’

‘No, I won’t have that, Phoebe. He’s a bad man who preys on women.’

‘It’s just as well I’d planned to leave tomorrow.’ Phoebe scrubbed at her lips with the cloth. ‘I never want to see him again, ever.’

‘I don’t want you to go away, but you’ll be safe from him in London. It’s a big place and he’ll never find you there.’

‘I don’t want anybody to tell him where I’m going. He said he’d never let me go, Rose. He acted like a madman.’

Rose handed her a towel. ‘You’ll be gone first thing in the morning, and I’ve heard that he’s going to Bournemouth later in the day. He must have assumed that you would go with him. You’ve had a lucky escape, if you ask me.’

The house in Saffron Hill smelt of mouse droppings and stale garlic with just a hint of the lavender and beeswax polish that Nonna lavished on the furniture and floorboards. It had been a tiring journey after an emotional parting from Judy, Dolly and the rest of the lodgers, whom Phoebe had come to look upon as family rather than just friends. Most upsetting of all was leaving Rose and they had been in tears as they promised lifelong friendship.

As Phoebe went round opening windows even though it was cold and rainy outside, she could not help comparing the dilapidated house, jostling for position amongst even less well kept buildings in a street that had never seen better days, with Judy’s establishment. Its spacious, if old-fashioned rooms were admittedly on the shabby side, but the seafront location made up for what the house lacked in splendour. She knew she would miss the fresh salt air and the rhythmic sound of the waves on the pebbles which had lulled her to sleep at night. Outside in Saffron Hill she could hear the rumble of cartwheels and the clatter of horses’ hooves muffled by the mud and detritus that littered the cobblestones. The raucous cries of pedlars, street sellers were almost drowned out by the loud guffaws and shouts of drunks coming from the pub on the corner. The high-pitched voices of the ragged urchins begging for coppers or screeching in pain as the bigger boys walloped those smaller and weaker than themselves were even harder to bear. Teddy would not be allowed to run riot like them, she thought as she attempted to get a fire going in the range. She glanced over her shoulder at Ivy, who was huddled in a chair with Teddy clasped in her arms as though she was afraid to put him down in this alien environment.

‘Is this the first time you’ve been to London, Ivy?’ Phoebe sat back on her haunches to wait for the kindling to splutter into flames.

‘Yes’m.’ Ivy’s eyes were round and her sallow face pale. ‘I think I want to go home.’

‘And so you shall,’ Phoebe said, thinking fast. She
must
humour Ivy as she could not hope to find another wet nurse at such short notice and Teddy seemed to be doing well in her care. ‘As soon as my brother is able to take cow’s milk I’ll put you on the first train to Brighton with your fare paid, and money in your purse. Is that a bargain?’

‘I suppose so, ma’am.’ Ivy glanced round the kitchen as if expecting cutthroats to be lurking in each dark corner. ‘This is a big house for just us.’