Read A Life Plan Without You. Online

Authors: Christine Wood

Tags: #bullying, #longing, #first love, #lonliness, #ballroom dancing, #insecurities, #age differences, #80s disco era, #family fudes

A Life Plan Without You. (5 page)

Err yes I did know what he meant, I knew what she did and with
whom, the thought of Sam and her doing the do, sort of made me
angry and sad again. Umm dance on ignore, regroup and ignore the
cow in the corner. Please put happy thoughts in my head ladies,
happy thoughts and now, before I kill the bitch-troll-ho invading
the room! Lee did that he pulled me close and winked, as he
listened to the crap coming from Karen…

“So, she thinks your technically flawed, does she not know I’m
your teacher babes? Well lets show her perfection, let’s give them
a show and rock the next the dance.” He told Ellie to sit as Cathy,
his helper for the night, was having a bad pregnancy. It was
hitting her badly and her constant need to pee was stopping her
from teaching a full hours lesson, poor woman.

We indeed rocked the floor, laughing as the rest sat
open-mouthed watching as we swung into full exhibition dancing
mode. As the music came to an end I took my bow, to it has to be
said to a resounding reward of clapping from the idiots who’d
invade my world. Jimmy sat smiling and clapping too. Karen was sat
gobsmacked and unable to give a speech on how she could have done
that better… Try bitch and I will wipe the floor with your skanky
arse…

“That folks is what a good dancer looks like, all technically
flawless and danced to perfection! Karen take note, Michelle’s
nippers are more advanced than you! Now boys and girls if you’re up
for it, you too could learn to dance like our lovely Michelle, you
can book in for a free lesson next week and see if you like it?
Michelle here is happy to teach, as she knows her stuff and doesn’t
just think she’s a good dancer she is and she will be our new
professional dancer! So sign up and be taught properly.” I blushed
as I finished my lessons, cheek kisses from Lee and I went for a
refresh. As some of my friends from college had tagged along too,
including the other Michelle, the blonde one. I had decided it
would be rude not to sit with them.

The looks I seemed to be getting from the college idiots, made
me feel more uncomfortable and embarrassed. I put my hand to my
head and oh no my frizzy, room dried, curly hair. It must be an
ungodly holy fizz bomb of a mess, it had rained on my short, walk
up and all the hairspray I’d put on to tame the mop, to try at
least to make it look better, wouldn’t have done sweet sod all to
help matters. That was a complete and utter waste of time. I went
to the changing rooms to freshen up. I picked up my comfort
cardigan, ready for a quick exit, should the need arise. Grams had
in fact spent so long knitting it for my birthday and it was so
fluffy, warm, nice, and well-made and in my times of need, my
comforter, tonight it will be that self-same comforter.

There was someone already in the changing room, it was Lana,
with legs up to her armpits and gushing posh bitch from every pore.
She spotted me and smiled, thanking me for taking the nippers
class, she had, taught them for a few weeks, and she said that was
way too many times. No, she wants to teach hunky boyfriends, not
kiddies.

“Michelle, when did you get your hair permed? It’s great and
so natural and soft.” She had her hands in my hair. Was she
deliberately making me uncomfortable and freakier?

“It’s naturally curly hair Lana, it just got soaking wet in
the rain before class.” I replied curtly, what was she playing at?
I looked up and into the mirror and for the first time in eighteen
years, my hair didn’t look like the usual freaky frizzy mess it
usually was, I didn’t now look like Hair Bear, it did however look
like all the new curly perms, top models and footballers had! Oh
hell wow. I shook the freshly dampened curls and smiled, yeah for
the curl! Did I really just praise the hair?

“Here have a spray of this it’s my new perfume from a grateful
friend, Bill Blass, the perfume, not the admirer. You look so
different tonight Michelle, here have this too.” She handed over a
lip-gloss from her purse.

“You keep it as I’ve got a ton of it. Good dancing by the way,
thought anymore on doing it with Lee, and he really wants to give
it a go with you?” Lee and Warren had asked me to do the
professional circuit next year, and what with going in the navy, I
didn’t think it would be fair to train hard and let him
down.

“Thanks Lana for this, but no, I haven’t because the chances
are I would only be letting him down with my choice of career, and
well he needs commitment and I can’t give him that just now, to him
or anyone else.”

“I know, but things change, people come into your life and you
have to grab what you can whilst you can, live life to the max is
my motto and one that serves me well, look got to go my fellas
waiting for me downstairs see you next week and remember grab
chances when they come.” I smiled what was she on about, that was
the most she’d ever spoken to me in, well, forever? Off she went in
all her finery, smiling at me again strangely. Out into the arms of
her chap. I couldn’t see who it was, we were three floors up and
the windows needed a good clean, I just presumed it was Sam. Oh
bollocks, this night had done a straight turn around, yes it seems
it could get worse, because he had now left the building. I hung up
my cardi.

“We are not stopping in here all night.” I said to the mirror,
the music was playing, a foxtrot, so what now? Do I make a complete
idiot of myself in there half of the old year five mob were in
there watching. Where is my band of buds, when I need them most?
Onward Christian Soldier was now playing in my ever-filling brain,
complete with big bass drum, forward into battle, so come on
Michelle let battle commence. The lights were low mirror ball was
sparkling and whilst walking the dreaded walk to my waiting seat
why did it feel like the spotlight was on me?

I hoped this night would hurry up and finish, this lot would
hate it and next week would go back to normal, the next dance a
tango. The music started. Looking down at my lovely new shoes, I
was oblivious to the voices and chattering going on around me. I
could hear the sniggers and hushed whispered voices, I couldn’t
figure what, if anything had sparked the kerfuffle exactly, but had
I been room watching as I normally did, I would have seen him. I
looked up to see what the fuss was, Sam was there and his hand was
held out stretched to me.

“I’m thinking you still owe me that dance Michelle?” Oh my
days, in that moment the world stood still and there it felt like
wasn’t another soul in it, it was just him and me. I switched to
autopilot, shuffling out of my seat and into his strong waiting
arms and wow all before I realised what was happening to me was
real. The sniggers were still there, but the talking had stopped.
The music started, the tango my favourite dance, the dance of love,
romance and if done correctly exuded a strange and sexual feeling
in a room, oh hell we were really doing this and it was there the
chemistry for exuding that there sexual crap, yeahh be still my
beating heart and watch out wonky knees…

Shit stop it and snap out of it Michelle. I knew I was dancing
because my legs were moving. I could smell him, feel him, his heart
along with mine was racing, and we were holding each other close.
Yes, I’ve died and here I am in heaven, was I dreaming if so pinch
me? My head was a mass of thoughts and present, imaginary helpful
advisers. This was really happening wasn’t it? He was talking to me
I think, this snapped me suddenly out of my daydream.

“You dance well, Michelle and smell really nice.” He took a
deep breath in and smiled as he spoke. Speak Michelle come across
looking like the gawking girl, you really are.

“Thank you, it's Leggy Lana’s she sprayed it on me as she
passed me on her way out, it does smell nice, I may even buy my own
bottle.” She hadn’t been meeting Sam after all, he was here with
me, and my heart skipped a beat.

“Leggy Lana’s?” He was laughing at me. “Does she know you call
her that?”

“Umm I don’t think so and it’s nothing, compared to what the
others call her, she’d not like what the others call her.” Shit,
shit, shit I’d said that aloud.

“Oh and that is what then?” Blushing I spill.

“Loose-Legs-Lana, Lay-Over-Lana, Leg-Over-Lana, take your pick
the girls don’t like her much, because she’s so pretty and they
would kill to look like her.”

“Do you like her?” I blush no because you dance with her and
you have fun with her.

“I do, I think she dances well, she dresses so beautifully,
and her hair is lord, to die for what I wouldn’t give to be like
her.” Liar, liar pants on fire Welles.

“Why? Your hair is nice, though today it looks different, nice
different Michelle, don’t do something stupid to it, because it’s
lovely and it suits you.” I umm and then realise he’s looking down
into my eyes again and smiling.

He laughed and pulled me closer. We didn’t stop for what
seemed like an age. He didn’t speak, he just stared at me and yes,
I stared back. Lord, he was so nice to hold, I could feel his arm
muscles beneath his shirt, his chest was firm and the hairs on it
just tantalisingly visible from the button he had left undone, he
is teasing me with what’s under the other buttons. As he pulled me
closer, I could feel his heart, it was beating fiercely, and he
seemed to sigh as his arm hung from my waist, his thumb caressing
the small of my back.

“You don’t talk a lot?” I snapped back from my ogling the dark
angel, stood before me.

“So Sam, what do you want to talk about, then, and please
remember I still haven’t cleaned the filters yet?” He laughed as I
replied, finally finding my voice, after day dreaming we were
totally on our own and kissing, now that was a good daydream to be
having.

“Oh I don’t know how about the price of bread?” Laughing I
told him.

“Depends, they are normally about fifty pence, depending on
the size and type.” He was laughing at me again.

“Really? You say that like you’re an expert in that area?” I
smiled back up at him my face would crack if I smiled much
more.

“I work in the new shopping centre at the bakers, come cafe
there,
my Saturday job and work placement
for the last few months! It’s good for me, the placement thing they
actually pay me for working.” This was not the conversation I
thought I’d ever be having with this man Sam. “Have you got a clue
what or why Jimmy and that lot are doing here?” I asked, hoping to
find out why they had invaded my world of solace.

“No, I don’t know either. I had noted Jim Bobs with them
though.” I laughed at Jimmy’s name.

“Does he know you you’re having lessons here?” He looked deep
in thought.

“I’m not sure and I don’t really care what he thinks, but he’s
mad as hell you’re dancing with me though.” He laughed and pulled
me to him and smiled as I blushed, I need to reel in the blushing.
Not a lot of brotherly love between them there I noted.

The music stopped for the half time interval and he ushered me
to the empty seats in the corner, still holding my hand as he sat
me down asked what I wanted to drink and went to the bar, ordering
two cokes. Sitting back down he smiled, the hunk was now back by my
side. He sat so close to me, any closer and I’d be in his lap, oh
now there’s a thought! I’m going wake up in a minute and find I
have been dreaming.

Then the dream actually started to unroll, Karen was on her
way over, all boobs and fancy frock. Hey ho it was fun whilst it
lasted. Watching as my nightmare unfolds, the whole of the idiots
she’d brought with her, including Jimmy smiling like a
fool.

“Hi Sam long time no see! Dance the next dance with me, it’s a
ladies excuse me so excuse me Shelly? You don’t mind do you Shelly
Shell?” In her best I’m going to get him voice, she knew I hated
the name Shelly, yet she did it all the time, bitch-troll-ho!
Really, where exactly did you last see my Sam, oh yeah derrr dance
lessons last week… I had a sip of my coke there was no competition
her or me? Then before I knew what I was saying, the words were
falling out of my mouth. I had to leave before I saw her snatch him
away.

“Samuel is big enough to dance with whoever he wants and no,
if he wants to dance with you, he doesn’t need my permission Kazza,
and anyway I’m off in a minute. Thanks for the drink Samuel but I
promised Mum I’d be home early.” She hated Kazza it works both ways
bitch. She had won the bouncy big boobed bitch had won. She was
always going to win, girls like her always won and he was so way
out of my league. I sighed then shuffled uneasily in my seat as she
caressed his arm, why did this always happen to me,
please?

“Sorry Kazza, but I’ve already promised to walk Michelle home.
We were just about to get our coats, maybe some other time?” I
laughed as he took her arm off his and smiled at me. Karen that was
a man’s excuse me rebuff to the request to paw him and the offer
for the dance! I laughed inside and she cringed, when he said her
name as I had done. She shrugged her shoulders and walked off back
to her hangers on.

Jimmy by her side and she seemed to be screaming abuse at him?
If looks could kill, I would be six foot under and so too would
poor Sam I wonder what he has done to upset Jimmy? Who is almost
certainly angry with Sam but why? Did I just hear that right, he
had actually told her he was walking me home? I’m shaking to my
core. Sam was now offering to walk me home… This had turned into an
awesome night. The doubts though had now started to make their way
past the gatekeeper and were now flying around in my head, her
voice was looming and advice was imminent.

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