Authors: Constance Masters
“A skill every girl must learn one day I guess,” he said. “Now why don’t we sit somewhere we can all talk.” He took Destiny’s hand to help her down the rest of the stairs.
“Thanks,” she said.
* * *
“What’s all this about?” Sophia asked. “This is weird, all sitting at the table like this with no food.”
“Well, sometimes when people want to talk about things that are important, they want to be able to concentrate on each other’s faces,” Destiny said.
“That’s right,” Justin said. “Your mom and I need to talk to you about something important.”
Sophia looked from one face to another. “Well, somebody better just spit it out because I might just have a heart attack here; you’re scaring me.”
“Okay, you’re right, I’ll just say it,” Destiny said. She looked at Justin who was looking as scared as she was. “We’ll just say it. A long time ago, when we were in high school…”
“Mom! This doesn’t sound like a quick story. That was a thousand years ago and what do you mean when you say when
we
were in high school?”
“You have to stop interrupting me, Soph, or I’ll never get it out.”
“It means exactly what it sounds like,” Justin said. “The two of us knew each other in high school, well we more than knew each other and I wasn’t technically in high school I was in college.”
“Yes, except we started dating when Justin was still in high school. When he went to college, we were still boyfriend and girlfriend, only mostly just on the phone, until he came home for breaks.” Destiny added. “We loved each other.”
“Okay, I guess. This is weird.”
“No, it’s not, not really.”
“Then why didn’t you say something? I knew you were acting funny that first day he came here. Why didn’t you just introduce him as your old boyfriend?”
“It’s complicated,” Destiny said.
“What your mom is trying to tell you, Soph, is that when we were in love, we made you.” He sat there looking from Destiny to Sophia, waiting for someone to say something.
“So what you’re telling me is, you’re my father?” She looked at her mom. “He’s my father? You said my father was too young, that there were hard choices that had to be made. Now I know why you would never say what they were!”
“There
were
hard choices to be made,” Destiny said, her eyes filled with tears. “It was just that—” This was so hard and she was so scared to say the words. “I was the one that made them. Your daddy, Justin, didn’t know about you until yesterday.”
“Why didn’t you tell him? Why? I could have had a daddy; been one of the chosen ones who was lucky enough to have a complete family and you chose to not tell me or him but to keep it to yourself?”
All of her worst fears crashed down and she felt her heart sinking.
“I can understand that you're upset right now and that you have a lot of questions, Sophia, but your mother had her reasons for doing things the way she did. You’re just a little girl and you haven’t had to make any real grown up decisions yet and that’s great. You will make mistakes, and you’re going to be able to count on your family to get through them. That’s what we have to do now, we have to get through all this together, as a family.”
Destiny had never felt so much love for Justin as she did at that moment. She could see Sophia at least digesting what he’d said. “All I can say is, honey, I’m sorry.”
Sophia didn’t look at her mother but at Justin. “So this Lily-Grace person at school, the goody two-shoes, this makes her my sister, right?”
“Ah, yes it does,” Justin said.
“Does she know about me?”
“She does now. I just told her tonight. She was excited actually.”
“She was?” Destiny asked. That made her happy, as happy as she could be with her daughter giving her daggers every time she spoke. “Maybe we could all have dinner some time.”
“So we’re going to play happy families?”
“Would that be such a bad thing?”
Sophia shrugged. “Why was Lily-Grace excited?”
“She has always wanted a big sister, now she has one.”
“Oh, I guess it would be okay to meet her at least but I don’t want it to be at school, maybe I better stay home tomorrow and the next couple of days until we meet up on the weekend or something.”
“Nice try. You have to go to school,” Justin said. “How about, if your mom agrees, we swing by and pick up Lily-Grace and we all go out for ice-cream?”
Sophia smiled at Justin but refused to look at her mother. “She won’t mind; why don’t you ask her what she thinks.”
In normal circumstances, Justin would have liked to have told the little girl that she wasn’t going at all if she was going to be rude to her mother but these were not usual circumstances and the child was genuinely hurt. Baby steps. “You’d like to meet Lily-Grace wouldn’t you, Desi?”
“I’d love to,” she said, her love fading a little as she saw Justin become the hero and her slipping into wicked witch mode. Maybe he had a plan.
“You might want to go and put on some jeans or something though, Des, it’s a bit cool out there tonight.”
“Good idea,” she said. At least that was something. Would Sophia hate her even more if she redid her makeup? She just might have to take the risk. No need to scare off Lily-Grace. God knows what else
that
poor child was going to have thrown at her tonight.
* * *
Sophia hadn’t said two words to her the whole way to the house. Destiny was riding shotgun with Justin and her daughter was in the back. She wanted to ask her what would fix this but knew that not only would Justin hit the roof if she were to try and buy her way out of Sophia’s bad books but it would be wrong. It was her fault that this had all happened and there wasn’t a way to wash away the hurt with a bribe. The best thing she could do at the moment was to ignore the ignoring and show Soph that
things
would be okay; they would
all
be okay, maybe even better in the end. Who knew? The car stopped outside Justin’s childhood home and Destiny felt like her life was spinning backwards. “We’re here,” she said.
“That we are.” He squeezed her hand and turned to talk to Sophia. “How about we go in and you can meet Lily-Grace inside? There’s someone else who’s dying to meet you as well.”
“Who?”
“My mom, yours and Lily-Grace’s grandma would love to meet you.”
“Okay,” she said, undoing her seat belt.
“I might just wait in the car,” Destiny said. She could only take one important person hating her in one day. Justin’s mother must be furious to find she had hidden another of her granddaughters away all these years.
“Nope, whatever we do now, we have to do as a family,” he said. “May as well start now.”
Destiny still didn’t move, until Justin opened the door and undid her seat belt. Like she was five. Then she realized. She was the mother; if Soph had to do this, the least she could do was be right beside her. She climbed out of the car and took a deep breath; they could do this. Please don’t let Lily-Grace hate me too, she thought.
As they walked to towards the door, Destiny tried to take her daughter’s hand but she was shunned again. Sophia pulled her hand away from her mom’s and took Justin’s hand instead. Destiny had never felt more alone and then the door opened, before Justin had a chance to use his key.
Justin’s mom came running out of the house and enveloped Destiny in the biggest hug. “Desi girl,” she said. “Why didn’t you tell me? I could just smack your butt.”
“Mrs. Alexander, I’m so sorry,” she said, her eyes filling with tears.
“Hey, none of that,” the older woman said. “This is a celebration. We’ll have time to talk about all this another day. You have to meet our Lily-Grace and I have to get my hands on my newest granddaughter.”
Destiny turned to see Sophia meet her sister as an actual sibling for the first time and her breath caught in her throat. She hadn’t expected to see such a likeness. There were differences, of course, but the girls had the same shaped eyes, same shaped lips and eye brows. Their colorings were slightly different; Sophia’s hair was a shade or two lighter. She couldn’t wait to get to know this child to see how different or the same their personalities were.
“Hi,” Sophia said.
“Hi,” Lily-Grace said. “Do you want to see my room?”
“Sure, I guess.”
“I think we might save that for next time, honey,” Justin said. “If we’re going for ice cream, we better go. School day tomorrow.”
“Okay, Daddy,” Lily-Grace said. “I’ll show you next time.”
“Would you like to come with us, Mom?” Justin asked.
“Not this time,” she said. “I think I might just watch my stories and turn in.”
“Okay, Mom, you know you’re welcome.”
“Go and check those girls are buckled in the car properly, precious cargo there, son. I just want to have a quick word with Desi.”
“Don’t keep her long please.”
“This won’t take long.” She waited for him to be out of ear shot. “First of all, Desi, I just want to tell you that I think you two are very lucky to have found each other again after all this time. Justin’s been lonely since his wife died.”
“I know what you’re getting at Mrs. Alexander but I don’t know if he really even wants me. He wants his daughter.”
“Of course he does, but he wants you just as much.”
Destiny was a little taken back.
“A mother knows. I also know that although he loved his wife and they were happy, I never witnessed the passion that he has with you. You drive him crazy with your antics, you always did, but you also put a sparkle in his eyes that I haven’t seen since you two broke up. It came back yesterday.”
“Really? Do you really think that?”
“I more than think that. I know it. One other thing, and then you better go. No more Mrs. Alexander, you’re not eighteen anymore. Call me Dotty, all my friends do.”
Destiny gave the woman a huge hug. “Thank you Dotty,” she said.
“What flavor would you like, honey?” Destiny asked Lily-Grace. Justin had gone to the bathroom so she thought she would set the girls up with their ice cream cones.
“Could I have a cookie dough, please?” Lily-Grace answered politely.
“Of course you can, sweetie.” Destiny just loved the sweet way Lily-Grace spoke. She was always so respectful.
“What about you, Soph, made up your mind yet?” Destiny tried with Sophia. She could tell her daughter still didn’t want to answer her but greed was getting the better of her. She knew she couldn’t hold out much longer. It was terrible to measure one child against the other but at the moment, Sophia was the exact opposite of Lily-Grace, she couldn’t be ruder if she tried.
“I want chocolate, strawberry and butter pecan,” Sophia stated. Her eyes were narrowed, daring her mother to say no.
Destiny was a little stuck, although rude, this was the first time that Soph had deigned to speak to her at all since they’d told her the news about Justin. Then there was Lily-Grace, who was as polite as all get out and hadn’t asked for squat except a cookie dough cone. That wasn’t fair at all. “Lily-Grace, would you like to choose some more flavors too?” she asked.
“No, that’s okay; I usually just have the one scoop if it’s at night.”
“Why?” Sophia asked. Let’s face it, if you were going to have ice cream, there was no point being stingy with it.
“Because Daddy says too much sugar makes kids hyper and then they don’t go to sleep,” she explained.
“Man, it’s only ice cream. It’s a liquid. It goes right through. Live a little.” Maybe she wasn’t the greatest influence in the world but this kid was stitched up so tight. She could do with a little loosening.
“Do you think it would be okay?” Lily-Grace asked nervously.
“Sure, if Sophia is getting three flavors then you can have three flavors too.”
“Thanks!” the little girl said.
Glad to see that everyone appeared to be smiling, Destiny busied herself by ordering up a storm. “You know, I don’t think cones are going to hold all that ice cream, maybe we’ll take them in a dish.” Destiny smiled at the man who was scooping the ice cream generously into long dishes.
“I’m sorry I took so long,” Justin said, arriving at the table. “there was a long queue.” He frowned at the enormous dishes of ice cream.
“The girls had trouble deciding, didn’t you, girls?” Destiny said, seeing the look on his face. Perhaps she should have listened to the rational child.
“I didn’t have trouble deciding. I knew what I wanted,” Sophia said.
“I’m guessing that was nearly everything?” Justin raised his eyebrows not at either of his daughters but at Destiny. “You had trouble deciding, Lils?” he asked his daughter.
Lily-Grace looked sheepish, and there was no way Destiny was going to let her get into trouble for something she’d done; she had practically twisted the child’s arm. “She told me she was only supposed to have one scoop but Sophia wanted a little extra and I wasn’t going to be unfair to Lily-Grace by just getting her one scoop.”
“Nice, Mom,” Sophia said. “Throw the old kid under the bus to stop the new one getting into trouble. It’s only ice cream
geez
.”
“Sophia, stop,” Justin said. “I’ve been trying to be patient but you are not to be so disrespectful to your mom. Do you understand?”
Sophia opened her mouth to argue but then closed it again. “Fine,” she said, grumpily.
It was nice of Justin to stick up for her but Soph looked like she was going to cry, she had to have been embarrassed. Great, another reason for her daughter to hate her. “Well, it was my fault really,” Destiny said. “I could have said no.”
“Well, we can talk about all that later, but for now, what do we do with all this ice cream? I say we share!” Justin grabbed another two spoons from the man behind the counter and pushed the two long dishes of ice cream into the middle of the table. “Dig in,” he said.
* * *
“So did everyone have a nice time?” Justin asked as his car pulled into the driveway of Destiny’s house.
“I did,” Destiny said. “I’m sure that the girls did too.”
Lily-Grace had drifted off to sleep and Sophia didn’t answer at first. She was staring at her dad. “I had fun,” she said, “Justin.”
“Well, good,” he said. “I’ll see you at school tomorrow.” Justin opened Destiny’s door and kissed her lips. “Don’t worry about the lying thing,” he said. “I’ll take care of that at school tomorrow, okay?”
“How?”
“She lied to the principal, we can make it a school punishment. Take the heat off you with that,” he said. “I know her world has been shaken up, but don’t let her be rude to you, Desi, she’s a kid. She has to learn respect. If she doesn’t talk to you, let her pout. She’ll come to you when she’s ready. Kids can’t hold out forever.” His kissed her again chastely and then whispered. “I wish I was staying tonight.”
“I do too,” she whispered back. “You could come back; we could talk?”
“I will, after I settle Lils into bed.” He opened Sophia’s door and she jumped out. “Finally,” she said. “I thought you two were going to make out all night.”
“Hey,” Justin said. “We weren’t making out. We were talking about how you’re going to come straight to my office in the morning when you get to school. We need to talk about you lying to the principal.”
“Oh, man,” she said. “Having a father who’s the school principal is going to suck.”
Justin chuckled but picked his daughter up and gave her a big hug. “I think it’s
great
that you’re my daughter,” he said.
“Thanks,” Sophia said awkwardly.
* * *
“What are you doing Soph, it’s late?” Destiny asked.
Sophia didn’t answer. She climbed down off the foot stool with a bag of microwave popcorn.
“You’re not making popcorn now, Sophia, it’s time for you to go to bed.”
Sophia looked her mother in the eye and bit opened the plastic outer wrapping.
“Did you hear me?” Destiny could have screamed. Justin was coming back and he was going to witness yet another scene where her daughter clearly showed who was in control of the house. Not that she wanted to keep comparing styles but she had to agree that Lily-Grace was easier and dare she say it, nicer than Sophia could be at times. She knew there was a sweet kid in there somewhere but at the moment she was being kept well under wraps. Maybe it was time she took a stand. The fact that they were having an argument so late over a bag of popcorn didn’t seem to hit her until she felt she was at a point of no return. “Sophia, take the popcorn out of the microwave,”
Sophia kept hitting buttons until the machine sprung to life.
That was it, Destiny hit breaking point. She leaned past Sophia and pressed the door opener, grabbed the partially popped bag and tossed it into the trash. “Soph, go
to bed
,” she said.
Sophia stared at her and then slammed the microwave shut. “I hate you!” she screamed. “And not in an I’m gonna love you again tomorrow kind of way! Like,
I will hate you
for the rest of my life!” She kicked over the step stool and ran up the stairs to her room.
Destiny felt her heart rip in two. What the hell had she done and what was she supposed to do now? Did she try and fix this, talk to the child? Was this all part of the plan? The stupid thing was, she had been trying to wrestle back control and all she had done was alienate her daughter. And she had
never
felt more out of control in her whole life.
She picked up the stool and then stood there in the kitchen with tears rolling down her face. What kind of a mess had she created here?
* * *
There was a quiet tapping on the door and she took herself off to answer it. Just what she needed, a knight in shining armor. “Hey,” she said. “You managed to get Lily-Grace into bed?”
“Yeah, she was tired. She got her pjs on and was out like a light within minutes, she didn’t even read tonight.”
“Oh wonderful, she reads before she goes to sleep,” Destiny said, only slightly sarcastically. No trying to block her from watching the Kardashians on cable then.
“It’s a great way to wind down at the end of the day, don't you think for kids?”
“Soph is not much of a reader; she’s more of a television kind of girl.”
“She has a television her room?”
“Well, yes, we are well into the twenty-first century here you know.”
“I know,” he started but stopped before he finished what he was about to say. “Are you okay? Did something happen?”
Destiny burst into tears. She nodded and tried to talk but she was really upset. This wasn’t pretty crying where a gentleman gets out a handkerchief and helps the lady dab at her tears. Although there was no denying that Justin was a gentleman,
she
was no lady and this was a distressing time. It was an ugly crying time. She actually snorted and it wasn’t pretty at all. The more she tried to explain what was wrong with her, the messier it became. Honestly, if Justin had run from the house and pulled the door shut behind him, she wouldn’t have blamed him. What he did choose to do made her heart swell. He ran to the downstairs bathroom and grabbed a roll of toilet paper. Then he scooped her up and sat on the love seat, cradling her in her arms; rocking and soothing her until she calmed. “She hates me. She fucking hates me,” she finally managed to spit out.
“Aw, honey, she doesn’t hate you, she loves you more than anyone. She’s petrified. Her life has been all comfort and happiness, now here comes a new person, something that she always wanted but it comes at a price. Her life is changing and she feels totally out of control.”
“Why do you think that Lily-Grace reacted so differently? She seemed to just take it all in her stride.”
“Lily-Grace has a routine, she has grown up that way and it’s what she knows. I am the person in charge and she knows that, she’s comfortable with that because her only job is to be a little girl. She makes mistakes and she gets punished and then we move on. Life doesn’t have to always be about life-long blame and retaliation. There is no harmony in anarchy.”
“How do you do it? Get control like that? I tried and I ended up with an even angrier little girl who shouted that she’d always hate me and ran away. What do I do with that? I can’t control her feelings. If she hates me, she does. Maybe I deserve that.”
“Don’t talk like that, I mean it.”
“You don’t want to move in here with us do you? I’ll even let you be the one in charge, I don’t think
I
can change or change the way Soph and I live, not by myself.”
“That’s a dilemma, honey,” Justin said. “I could easily and happily do that, but I don't think it will solve the problem with you and Soph. You need to get that dynamic working first, which I will help you with, of course. Then there’s my job; I’m the school principal, I can’t really be living in sin in a small community like this, it’s also not the message I would like to give the girls. When the time is right, I’d rather do this properly.”
“Are you asking me to marry you?” She was half joking.
“Not yet, I am telling you though that I am committed to getting this family into some kind of working order.”
“I guess I can take that.” She had to admit she was a little disappointed. It would be a lot easier in some ways for him to move in and take over, she was feeling envious of Lily-Grace at this point.
“And, I really like us being us again, if that’s what you want too?”
That took her by surprise a bit, although she was sitting in his lap and his hand was pretty much down her pants where he was squeezing her butt cheek. “I like being us again too.” She kissed him softly. “God, I hope we can make all this work out.”
“We will, I’m confident of that, honey.”
“Are you staying for a while?” she asked hopefully.
“Not a good idea, I don’t think,” he said. “I have school tomorrow.” He retrieved his hand.
She looked confused.
“We have a spectator on the stairs,” he whispered. “I might just go say goodnight to her and then I’ll go. So lunch tomorrow?”
“I’ll be waiting,” she smiled. “Eat your lunch before you get here,”
“Good idea,” he said with a chuckle before giving her a peck goodbye.
“Come down and give me a hug before I go, Soph, and then you better go to bed,” Destiny heard him say.
* * *
All seemed to be quiet when Destiny got out of the shower. She donned her favorite pajamas and climbed into bed. She lay there for a while, trying to stop her mind from running away from her and when she couldn’t, she switched the television on. When she looked up through the dim light in the room, Sophia was standing in the doorway staring at her.
“Hi, Soph,” she said.
“Hi, can we talk?” she asked.
Destiny immediately flipped back her covers. “Anytime, you know that.”
Sophia ran across the room and jumped into the bed, although she didn’t immediately fall into her mother’s arms. She lay there on the opposite pillow just staring at the ceiling.