A Lady's Choice (4 page)

Ellen cast a quick look around before she grasped Sarah's shoulder. “I reckon I have, Sarah. But if I was you, I wouldn't talk about it in these parts. Some folks don't take kindly to such ideas.”

Sarah nodded. “I know, but it's the same wherever you go. Maybe it's time women quit worrying about what people are going to say and get busy doing something about it.”

Ellen regarded her with a stern look. “I don't know if your disagreement with Alex is the reason you're talking like this to me. But I want you to know one thing about Alex. God gave him a tender heart for other people, and I have to say it makes me right proud.”

Sarah nodded at Ellen's words. “I'm sure he owes it all to you, Ellen. He loves you a lot.”

“And I love him too. I'd give my life for that boy.”

Ellen's words pierced Sarah's heart. “I know you would. Please forgive me for bringing up things we don't need to be discussing. I hope you'll hold it in confidence.”

“I will.”

Sarah forced a smile to her face. “I'm getting a little warm out here in the sun. I think I'll go back in the church with my mother and listen to the singing. It's been nice to see you again, Ellen. Tell Alex I enjoyed spending time with him today.”

Sarah turned and walked toward the church. With each step her heart sank lower, and a heavy weight crushed her chest. She brushed hot tears from her eyes and blinked to stop the flow that threatened to flood her face.

In the short time she'd spoken with Alex today, she realized their goals were very different. Last night she'd even fantasized that something special might happen between them, but she was a foolish woman for having such thoughts. It would be better if they didn't complicate matters by getting to know each other better.

She and Alex Taylor were set on different courses in life, and nothing could change it.

On Friday afternoon Sarah sat on the front porch waiting for Uncle Charlie to arrive. She closed her eyes and inhaled deeply in an effort to dispel the thick veil of silence that had hovered over the house all week. Her mother had hardly gotten out of bed since they returned from church last Sunday, and Sarah had stayed by her side most of the time.

To add to the gloom, she hadn't been able to quit thinking about her argument with Alex. Right before it happened, he had told her he wanted to call on her, but so far he hadn't shown up. She supposed her outburst had taken care of that.

When she would begin to think such thoughts, she'd shake her head and tell herself it was all for the best. She couldn't afford to be friends with someone who would work for a man like James Buckley. It was better to keep a distance from Alex before it was too late to do so.

The screen door creaked, and Sarah jumped to her feet. Her mother, wearing her best dress, stood just outside the front door. She took a step, and her legs wobbled. Sarah rushed to her. “What are you doing dressed? You're too weak to go to the party.”

Her mother took a ragged breath and held out her hand. A heart-shaped locket dangled from her fingers. “I want you to wear this tonight.” She dropped the necklace in Sarah's open palm.

Sarah's fingers closed around the cool metal. For a long moment she stood still, unable to speak. “Mama, Poppa gave you this for a wedding present.”

Her mother's somber expression revealed nothing of her thoughts. “It's my most cherished possession, but I'm giving it to you.”

Sarah rubbed her thumb across the pendant, set with small diamonds, and gently pried it open. A wave of emotion swept over her at the images of her parents' young faces inside. She turned the locket and traced her finger over the small indentions on the back. “I can't believe my teeth were ever small enough to make these marks.”

Her mother laughed. “I suppose I was too interested in the sermon that Sunday to notice you chewing on the locket. Those marks have just made it more special to me, though.”

Sarah closed the locket, placed it around her neck, and snapped the catch in place. Tears welled in her eyes as she stood and faced her mother. “Oh Mama, thank you.”

Her mother reached over and centered the heart in the small of Sarah's throat. “Your father would be pleased to see what a beautiful young woman you've become. I'm so proud of you.”

Sarah gulped and tried to stem the threatening flow of tears. “Mama, I love you so much.”

Their arms encircled each other, and they stood without speaking until the sound of an approaching horse parted them. Uncle Charlie's buggy rumbled over the ruts in the road and rolled into the yard.

They stepped closer to the edge of the porch as he lumbered from the carriage. He looked up at them, took a white handkerchief from his hip pocket, and mopped the edges of his receding hairline. He hooked his fingers around the waistband of his pants and hitched them up over his potbelly before ascending the steps.

Sarah bit her tongue to keep from laughing out loud, for Uncle Charlie's trousers inched down again with every step he climbed. When he reached where they stood, he wrapped his arms around her mother and lifted her off her feet, his usual greeting. “Julia, my dear little sister. Are you sure you feel like coming tonight?”

“I do, Charlie. If I get tired, I'll go lie down, but I don't want to miss the party you and Clara have planned for us.”

He laughed, and his jowls jiggled. “Good. I think there's going to be a big crowd there. If you're ready, we need to go.”

Sarah and her uncle supported her mother on either side as she descended the porch steps. When they had her seated in the front seat of the buggy, Sarah climbed into the back. She smoothed her skirt and leaned forward. “Uncle Charlie, do you know who's coming tonight?”

He grabbed the reins and wrapped them around his hands. “Oh, lots of folks. I reckon about everybody in the community will be there.”

Although she told herself not to ask the question in her mind, she couldn't stop. “Do you think Ellen and Alex Taylor are coming?”

Uncle Charlie snapped the reins across the horse's back and guided him into the road. “I don't know. Ellen was in the store earlier this week. She said she was coming, but she didn't know about Alex. Seems like he's been working late in the fields every day and is tired when he gets home.”

Sarah leaned back against the leather seat and sighed. “I see.”

Uncle Charlie glanced over his shoulder. “But don't worry. There'll be lots of other young people there. You're gonna have a good time.”

She nodded. “I'm sure I will.”

It would be better if Alex didn't come. She needed to concentrate on getting to know the ones who would be there, not fretting over a man who hadn't bothered to follow through on his request to call on her. But no matter what she knew she should do, she couldn't ignore the fact she wanted to see him again.

If truth be told, she was the one who needed to offer an apology this time. Her words to him last Sunday had been harsh, and she regretted that. She had tried not to think about him all week, but he crept back into her thoughts from time to time. She remembered the hurt in his dark eyes and wondered if he would ever want to see her again. She closed her eyes and uttered a silent plea.

Please come tonight, Alex
.

Alex plodded along the path toward the house from the cotton patch where he and Augie had worked since sunup. He'd attacked the weeds and grass around the young plants like a madman in an attempt to rid his mind of Sarah. The question of what to do about tonight had rung in his head all day. One minute he convinced himself he wouldn't go to Sarah's party, and the next he wanted to see her again.

He wondered about Ellen's whereabouts as he stepped onto the back porch and slipped his work shoes from his feet. He trudged to the dry sink against the wall and dipped some water into the wash pan from the bucket.

As the water trickled down his lathered arms, he wished he could rinse his troubled thoughts from his mind that easily. He'd never been as shocked by anything in his life as he had by Sarah's accusation that he opposed suffrage. As he thought back on the conversation, he realized she hadn't actually said those words, but she had sure implied them.

It wasn't that he was opposed to women voting. He just didn't see a need in it. Most of the married men he knew were the decision makers in their homes, and that's the way he'd always thought it would be when he married. The world was getting along just fine the way it was, and he didn't see any need for a change right now.

He picked up the towel, dried his hands, and threw it into the sink. “Maybe I shouldn't go tonight.”

The screen door banged shut. Ellen, carrying a basket of onions and radishes from the garden, stepped onto the back porch. “What're you talking about?”

Alex turned away from her. “I'm trying to convince myself not to go to the party tonight.”

Ellen's eyes grew wide. “Why don't you want to go? Everybody from church is going to be there. It just seems right that we welcome Julia and Sarah to Richland Creek.”

He sighed. “Sarah and I had a difference of opinion on Sunday. She said some things that bothered me. I think it might be better if we didn't become any friendlier.”

Ellen set her basket down. “Was it about suffrage?”

He gasped. “How did you know?”

“Because she said something to me too. I warned her she shouldn't be talking like that around here. Lots of folks might take exception to it.”

Alex nodded and pursed his lips. “Good for you. She needs to be told.”

Ellen tilted her head to one side and sighed. “Now I think I may have done wrong. Just 'cause people are against something don't mean they don't need to hear another side of the issue.”

“I don't understand what you mean.”

Ellen pulled the sunbonnet from her head and patted her hair into place. “Do you remember the night you told me you wanted to be a lawyer?”

He rubbed the back of his neck and grinned. “Yeah. I think I was about sixteen, and I'd just finished reading a biography of John Adams for school. You were sitting in front of the fireplace reading your Bible, and I sat down on the floor next to you.”

“You looked so much like Pa I thought my heart was gonna burst open.” Ellen smiled as if she was reliving the memory of that night. “You were all excited 'cause you'd read something you wanted to tell me about.”

Alex smiled. “It was the account of how John Adams had defended eight British soldiers who had killed some people in the Boston Massacre.”

Ellen nodded. “That's right. John Adams had been outspoken against the occupation of Boston, but in this case he realized nobody knew who fired first or who was responsible for those killed. He took the case because he believed everybody is entitled to be defended in court. He got a lot of criticism over doing that, but he did what he believed was right.”

Alex sighed and shook his head. “You've made your point, Ellen. Because of John Adams's defense, six of the soldiers were acquitted, and two were charged with manslaughter. In his later life he called it one of the most gallant actions of his life and said it was the best service he'd ever done for his country.”

“And that's what I want you to do. Be gallant in dealing with folks who have differing opinions, and I want you to defend those whose cases may appear hopeless. Give them what John Adams gave those British soldiers, and don't be so set on something just 'cause other folks say it's so. Find out for yourself.”

Alex put his arms around his sister and hugged her. “You're a very wise woman, Ellen.”

Ellen pulled back and stared into his eyes. “One more thing I hope you'll remember in dealing with folks. We can't make other people do what we want. But we can accept the way we feel about 'em even though we don't like their choices. Sarah may need you more than you can even imagine. Just pray about it. God will tell you what to do.”

Much as he hated to admit it, Ellen sensed the need in people better than he. “You're right. I can't change Sarah. But maybe I can be her friend.” He took a deep breath. “Now about that party. Are you going?”

Ellen grinned. “I wouldn't miss it for anything.”

He headed toward the kitchen door but stopped and looked back at Ellen. “And I'm going with you. I'll be ready before you know it.”

“I'll be waiting.”

When he reached his bedroom, he closed the door and sank down on the bed. Second thoughts about attending tonight's party flashed through his head. Maybe he shouldn't go. Sarah might prefer not seeing him again.

He'd never known a woman before who spoke with such passion on a subject. All the girls he'd met while in school had one thing on their mind—finding a man to marry. From what he'd observed with Sarah, that was probably the last thing on her mind. But that was good. He didn't need to get involved with anyone. He had a new life waiting for him in Memphis, and he couldn't afford to do anything to compromise what he'd worked so hard to attain.

Alex pounded the mattress with his fist and pushed to his feet. One party wasn't going to affect his life. There would be lots of his friends there, and he'd enjoy the evening with them. He didn't even have to spend any time with Sarah Whittaker.

He strode to the armoire across the room, jerked the door open, and stilled at the sight of his baseball shirt hanging inside. Ellen must have washed it and hung it there. He reached out and ran his finger over the team's name embroidered on the shirt pocket.

The memory of a young girl standing with her skirt lifted above her ankles returned, and his heart dropped to the pit of his stomach. A sigh drifted up from the depths of his soul. He wasn't fooling himself. All his protests that he didn't care about seeing Sarah again weren't true. In his heart he knew he had to see her.

From the moment he laid eyes on her, all he could do was think about her. He had to find a way to push her from his mind. Maybe tonight he'd find the answer of how to do that.