He only shook his head and was through my window before I could stop him. “Wait!” I tried to catch his arm, but he was going down fast. He made it half-way to the bottom and jumped to the ground, taking off running into the night.
I didn’t even think. I grabbed my bag and dashed out my bedroom door, down the stairs and out the door after him. In the distance I heard a car driving off, and I went back inside, scribbled a quick note to my parents, and grabbed the keys to the Civic. I’d never catch a Beemer, but I had to try.
It felt like hours passed with me driving up and down the beach road straining my eyes for any sign of him. The Beemer was back at his mom’s house, but after beating on the door and yelling, I gave up. He wasn’t there.
Finally, I parked my car at the Romar Beach pavilion and walked out to the water. I didn’t know what else to do. My breath caught when I saw a dark figure sitting down by the water. The closer I got, the surer I was.
Fighting against the urge to run and tackle him, I slowly walked to the shoreline. I looked out at the water. I listened to the waves crash. My arms hugged around my waist, and I took a slow breath, thinking about what to say. Coming up with nothing, I turned back to face him.
I sat next to Julian on the sand, and for several long minutes we didn’t speak. We only watched the waves crashing, and I thought about all the times I’d studied these waters. At last, he spoke.
“As close as we were and you never told me?” His voice was quiet. “How could you keep that from me?”
I did my best to stay calm. “I kept begging them to tell you. You don’t know how many times I almost told you anyway.”
He propped his arms on his bent knees and looked down, but I reached out and held his hand.
“Please, Julian,” I was trying not to cry, but my voice broke anyway. “Please don’t shut me out. I love you.”
“Don’t go there, Anna.” His tone hurt worse than anything.
“It’s true,” I said, desperation clear in my voice. “And you love me. This has nothing to do with us.”
His eyes flashed. “It has a little to do with us. You’ve been hiding things from me again. How you could go on knowing Jack was my brother and not tell me?”
“I… I promised,” I whispered, looking down. “It had nothing to do with him either.”
At that, Julian dropped his arms and stood. “I’m going to see him.”
My brows pulled together. “Jack?”
“My father.” He caught my hand then. “And you’re coming with me.”
“But—” The look on Julian’s face shut my mouth. I nodded. “Let’s go.”
I followed him back up the long stretch of sand to the parking lot. I knew Julian’s car was back at his house. “Should I drive?” I asked, almost afraid to speak.
“No,” he said. “Let’s get the new car.”
We drove in silence to his mom’s house, where we got into the shining Beemer and headed off toward Hammond Island. He didn’t look at me the entire time, and my stomach was in knots. I was completely desperate. I would not let his stupid, selfish parents break us up. Not now. Not after all we’d been through. Julian was mine, and they were going to fix this or I’d be figuring out a way to make them.
The drive went by in a blur. The last time I’d driven this way with Julian was the night of Jack and Lucy’s birthday party. That night had ended with me running from the house after seeing Jack with Casey Simpson, and Julian chasing after me trying to console me. He’d wanted to take me home, but I’d sent him back inside to be with his half-sister. Neither of us knew about the family connection then, and I wondered if Julian was thinking about it now.
When we arrived at the house, the only car in the driveway was the silver Audi. Lucy wasn’t here, but I knew who was. We both knew. He parked the car and walked around to help me out, still silent.
“Julian, wait.” I said.
He stopped to look at me, but his expression was closed.
“Before we go in there, just listen to me.” He started to turn away, but I grabbed his arm hard. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry I ever knew about this. I never wanted to know this secret, and more than that, I never wanted to keep it from you.”
“I appreciate your concern.”
“Julian, stop!” I cried. “I’ve been on your side the whole time, but I had to keep my word. Please believe me. I’ve been begging them to tell you. And when we go in there now, I’m still on your side. You deserved to know the truth.”
Finally he exhaled. His shoulders dropped as he looked down. I held my breath watching his actions until he finally pulled me into his arms. I almost burst into tears. My knees were weak, and my body shook as he stroked my back.
“Calm down,” he said. “I don’t want to be mad at you. I just want to know the truth.”
“Oh, Julian.” I reached up to pull his face to mine. He kissed me briefly, but he pulled away, focused on what was coming. I felt only slightly better. He was still angry, and I wasn’t entirely out of the woods with him yet. They’d better fix this.
We entered the large home, and Julian walked straight into the living room.
“Mom?” He shouted, looking up and around. “Please come here. I need to speak to you. Mom!”
My eyes were huge, my whole body tense. I heard noises from upstairs. A few seconds passed before Ms. LaSalle appeared on the landing. She was only slightly disheveled, and it seemed she hadn’t been here long.
“Julian?” she said, glancing at me. “What’s this about?”
“That’s what I’d like to know. I was at Anna’s and I found this.” He pulled out the letter and placed it on the coffee table. His mother quickly descended and picked it up. Just then, Mr. Kyser appeared and began walking down the stairs. He looked resigned, and when he made it to the bottom, he walked over and poured himself a scotch.
“How did you get this?” she said.
“Maybe you should ask my dad.” Julian’s voice was sharp, and Ms. LaSalle’s eyes flashed to me, but he cut her off. “She didn’t tell me anything, and I don’t like you making Anna lie for you.”
Calm permeated her tone. “I didn’t mean for her to find out. I never wanted you to know—”
“Why not?” His voice rose. His whole body was tense, and my stomach was sick. “You didn’t think I needed to know? You made that choice for me?”
“Julian…” She reached for his arm, but he pulled away.
“Stop it, Mom. You were only thinking of yourself.”
“That is not true,” she snapped. “I have always thought of you. You’ve had everything you ever needed, and we’ve always been fine by ourselves.”
“I never had a dad.” He looked at Mr. Kyser. “Why did you let her do this?”
His father lowered the scotch glass. “I don’t tell your mother what to do, Julian. Whatever she wants is fine with me.”
“At least you’re honest about it.” Julian turned away. I didn’t know what to say. Ms. LaSalle stepped forward and touched his arm. Her voice was gentle now, but I could tell it bristled her son. “Julian? Baby? What are you thinking?”
He wouldn’t look at her. “I’m not a baby. I haven’t been for a long time. And it would’ve been nice to have a dad.”
Mr. Kyser placed his drink down and stepped forward to put his hands on Ms. LaSalle’s shoulders. “Julian, please don’t be angry with your mother. She was trying to protect you.” He exhaled. “I’m not exactly a model father.”
Julian looked at him, and his expression made my chest hurt. “You gave up that easily? Didn’t you even care?”
“Of course I did.” He stepped toward his son. “But… your mother was right. The truth would’ve only made your life more difficult.”
“How?” Julian said.
“It’s a small town. I don’t exactly have a lot of privacy.”
“So you let me go.”
“I’ve always maintained contact.”
Julian shook his head. “It’s not that easy. You can’t just send money and have that make it okay.”
Mr. Kyser’s hands were open, as if he wanted to reach out. “I know,” he said. “You needed more.”
“What did you need?” Ms. LaSalle cut in angry. “You had everything. I made sure there was nothing you didn’t have.”
Julian rubbed his hand over his eyes. “I needed a dad. I needed to know who I was, other than some bastard kid with a hippy mom who lived on the beach like a gypsy. It doesn’t instill a lot of confidence.”
His mother wouldn’t hear any of it. “You have always been confident. Look at you now! Everyone’s holding their breaths to see what you’ll do next. That other stuff’s just in your head.”
He pulled away. “You don’t understand.”
“I understand,” Mr. Kyser said. This time he did put his hand on Julian’s shoulder. “This doesn’t make up for the past, but now you know the truth. I’m glad you know, and I want you to feel like you can come to me for anything.”
“Whatever.” Julian shook his head. “I don’t want a handout from you.”
“I don’t just mean money. You’re an interesting kid, Julian, and I’ve never regretted being your dad. I wish I could’ve handled things differently.”
“I’ve got to go.” Julian caught my hand. “C’mon, Anna.”
“Wait!” His mother stepped toward him.
“No!” I had never seen Julian so angry. “You just stay here. With him.”
He turned and stalked out, me right behind him.
“Give him some space.” I heard Mr. Kyser saying as we left the house.
When we got to the car, Julian stopped. I waited facing him until he reached forward and wrapped his arms around my shoulders, pulling me to him. I held his waist tightly, and I could feel him trembling.
“Are you okay?” I asked softly.
He nodded.
“What do you want to do?” I said, still holding him.
His voice was thick. “I don’t know.”
“Are you mad at me?”
He kissed my head, squeezing me again. “No. Those two can be pretty intimidating.”
I squeezed him and stepped back to see his face. “I love you.”
He nodded then glanced up at me. “Where does that leave my brother?”
My nose wrinkled. “That’s kind-of weird, huh?”
“Not as weird as Lucy being my sister. Jesus, that was close. And dammit! They knew the whole time.”
“I’m not defending them,” I started cautiously. “But they were concerned about that. Part of what they were talking about when I found them in the hospital was separating you two without blowing their cover.”
He exhaled and leaned against the car. “Why wouldn’t they tell me?”
I leaned beside him. “They’ve got a long story and pretty good reasons,” I said, wondering if they would tell him everything. “And I think your mom worried the truth might change you.”
“I’m glad she’s got so much confidence in me.” He stood and helped me into the car. “I don’t know. Maybe she’s right. Maybe if I’d known, I wouldn’t have worked so hard. Maybe I’d have ended up as lost as Lucy.”
He got in and turned us out of the flagstone drive onto the road.
“She’s not so lost now,” I said. “And at least your mom adores you. Mr. Kyser completely shut Lucy out.”
“I guess he can be a real jerk.” Then Julian shook his head. “I don’t know. That’s just what I’ve heard.”
“Maybe you should get to know him for yourself.” I was trying to tread lightly. “He loves your mom a lot, and maybe… it would’ve been different if they’d gotten together.”
We drove in silence a few minutes. Then he exhaled with a tight smile.
“What?” I asked.
“I guess I should’ve thanked him for this car.”
“Oh. Yeah.”
We were quiet again, and I decided not to tell him my role in the whole car-buying decision. I didn’t want to risk him getting mad at me again. Our fingers were entwined, and he turned mine over to look at my ring. Then he reached up and stroked my cheek.
“I guess I know who my dad is now,” he said. “And you’re wearing my ring.”
In spite of it all, a little thrill tingled in my stomach. “That was the deal.” My voice sounded shaky. My insides were a blend of relief he wasn’t angry, happiness we were together, and excited nervousness about what he was suggesting.
“I’m sorry I blamed you.” His voice was slowly returning to that familiar cocky playfulness I knew and loved. “Maybe you could come back to my house. We could kiss and make up?”
My heart jumped. “Sure.”
Chapter 25
We drove back to the small cottage on Crystal Shores Boulevard. It was dark, and he led me inside to his bedroom. I looked around. I’d been to Julian’s house a million times, but we’d always stayed in the garage where he worked. I’d never actually been back here. Sketch books were scattered around, and I walked over and opened the cover of one lying on the desk. It had figure drawings that I recognized as a few of his larger sculptures. A popping noise from the other room distracted me, and soon he was back handing me a bubbling glass.
“I’ve kind of given up alcohol for the duration—” I started.
“I know, but it might relax things.”
“Oh.” I nodded feeing a flush. “Right.”