Read The Elegance of the Hedgehog Online

Authors: Muriel Barbery,Alison Anderson

The Elegance of the Hedgehog

Contents

MARX

1. Whosoever Sows Desire

2. The Miracles of Art

Profound Thought No. 1

CAMELLIAS

1. An Aristocrat

Journal of the Movement of the World No. 1

2. On Wars and Colonies

3. The Poodle as Totem

Profound Thought No. 2

4. Refusing the Fight

Profound Thought No. 3

5. In a Sorry State

6. Homespun Cowls

7. In the Confederate South

Journal of the Movement of the World No. 2

8. Prophet of the Modern Elite

9. Red October

Profound Thought No. 4

10. A Cat Called Roget

Profound Thought No. 5

11. The Rebellion of the Mongolian Tribes

Profound Thought No. 6

12. Phantom Comedy

13. Eternity

Journal of the Movement of the World No. 3

14. When of a Sudden, Old Japan

15. The Rich Man’s Burden

Profound Thought No. 7

16. Constitution’s Spleen

17. A Partridge’s Ass

18. Ryabinin

Profound thought No. 8

ON GRAMMAR

1. Infinitesimal

2. In a Moment of Grace

Profound Thought No. 9

3. Beneath the Skin

4. Break and Continuity

Profound Thought No. 10

5. A Pleasant Impression

6. Wabi

Profound Thought No. 11

SUMMER RAIN

1. Clandestine

2. The Great Work of Making Meaning

3. Beyond Time

4. Spiders’ Webs

5. Of Lace and Frills and Flounces

Journal of the Movement of the World No. 4

6. Just a Trim

7. The Vestal Virgin in Her Finery

Profound Thought No. 12

8. Saints Alive

9. Dull Gold

10. What Congruence?

11. Existence Without Duration

Journal of the Movement of the World No. 5

12. A Wave of Hope

13. Tiny Bladder

Journal of the Movement of the World No. 6

14. How Much for One Roll?

15. A Very Civilized Noble Savage

16. And Then

17. A New Heart

18. Gentle Insomnia

Profound Thought No. 13

PALOMA

1. Terribly Sharp

2. For All Its Invisibility

3. The Just Crusade

Profound Thought No. 14

4. The First Principle

5. The Antipodes

6. Baby Porpoise

7. Deep Blue

Journal of the Movement of the World No. 7

8. Contented Little Sips

9. Sanae

10. Dark Clouds

11. Rain

12. Sisters

Profound Thought No. 15

13. In the Pathways of Hell

14. From Passageway to Pathway

15. His Shoulders Soaked with Sweat

16. Something Must Come to an End

17. The Travails of Dressing Up

18. Flowing Water

19. They Shimmer

20. Gagauz Tribes

21. All Those Cups of Tea

22. Meadow Grass

23. My Camellias

One Last Profound Thought

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

ALSO BY MURIEL BARBERY

By purchasing this digital edition you have been granted right to its private use only.  All other uses, including those committed without knowledge of these conditions, are excluded and will be considered as a violation of copyright laws, an offense subject to prosecution.

Europa Editions
116 East 16th Street
New York, NY 10003
[email protected]
www.europaeditions.com
Copyright © 2006 by Editions Gallimard, Paris
First publication 2008 by Europa Editions
Translation by Alison Anderson
   Original title:
L'élégance du herisson
Translation copyright 2008 by Europa Editions
Cover/Emanuele Ragnisco
www.mekkanografici.com
ISBN 978-1-933372-60-0 (TPO, US)
ISBN 978-1-60945-013-7 (ePub, US)
ISBN 978-1-60945-015-1 (ePub, World)

Muriel Barbery

THE ELEGANCE OF THE HEDGEHOG

 

Translated from the French by Alison Anderson

For Stéphane, with whom I wrote this book

MARX
(
Preamble
)
1. Whosoever Sows Desire

M
arx has completely changed the way I view the world,” declared the Pallières boy this morning, although ordinarily he says nary a word to me.

Antoine Pallières, prosperous heir to an old industrial dynasty, is the son of one of my eight employers. There he stood, the most recent eructation of the ruling corporate elite—a class that reproduces itself solely by means of virtuous and proper hiccups—beaming at his discovery, sharing it with me without thinking or ever dreaming for a moment that I might actually understand what he was referring to. How could the laboring classes understand Marx? Reading Marx is an arduous task, his style is lofty, the prose is subtle and the thesis complex.

And that is when I very nearly—foolishly—gave myself away.

“You ought to read
The German Ideology
,” I told him. Little cretin in his conifer green duffle coat.

To understand Marx and understand why he is mistaken, one must read
The German Ideology
. It is the anthropological cornerstone on which all his exhortations for a new world would be built, and on which a sovereign certainty is established: mankind, doomed to its own ruin through desire, would do better to confine itself to its own needs. In a world where the hubris of desire has been vanquished, a new social organization can emerge, cleansed of struggle, oppression and deleterious hierarchies.

“Whosoever sows desire harvests oppression,” I nearly murmured, as if only my cat were listening to me.

But Antoine Pallières, whose repulsive and embryonic whiskers have nothing the least bit feline about them, is staring at me, uncertain of my strange words. As always, I am saved by the inability of living creatures to believe anything that might cause the walls of their little mental assumptions to crumble. Concierges do not read
The German Ideology
; hence, they would certainly be incapable of quoting the eleventh thesis on Feuerbach. Moreover, a concierge who reads Marx must be contemplating subversion, must have sold her soul to that devil, the trade union. That she might simply be reading Marx to elevate her mind is so incongruous a conceit that no member of the bourgeoisie could ever entertain it.

“Say hello to your mother,” I murmur as I close the door in his face, hoping that the complete dissonance between my two sentences will be veiled by the might of millennial prejudice.

2. The Miracles of Art

M
y name is Renée. I am fifty-four years old. For twenty-seven years I have been the concierge at number 7, rue de Grenelle, a fine
hôtel particulier
with a courtyard and private gardens, divided into eight luxury apartments, all of which are inhabited, all of which are immense. I am a widow, I am short, ugly, and plump, I have bunions on my feet and, if I am to credit certain early mornings of self-inflicted disgust, the breath of a mammoth. I did not go to college, I have always been poor, discreet, and insignificant. I live alone with my cat, a big, lazy tom who has no distinguishing features other than the fact that his paws smell bad when he is annoyed. Neither he nor I make any effort to take part in the social doings of our respective species. Because I am rarely friendly—though always polite—I am not liked, but am tolerated nonetheless: I correspond so very well to what social prejudice has collectively construed to be a typical French concierge that I am one of the multiple cogs that make the great universal illusion turn, the illusion according to which life has a meaning that can be easily deciphered. And since it has been written somewhere that concierges are old, ugly and sour, so has it been branded in fiery letters on the pediment of that same imbecilic firmament that the aforementioned concierges have rather large dithering cats who sleep all day on cushions covered with crocheted cases.

Similarly, it has been decreed that concierges watch television interminably while their rather large cats doze, and that the entrance to the building must smell of pot-au-feu, cabbage soup, or a country-style cassoulet. I have the extraordinary good fortune to be the concierge of a very high-class sort of building. It was so humiliating for me to have to cook such loathsome dishes that when Monsieur de Broglie—the State Councilor on the first floor—intervened (an intervention he described to his wife as being “courteous but firm,” whose only intention was to rid our communal habitat of such plebeian effluvia), it came as an immense relief, one I concealed as best I could beneath an expression of reluctant compliance.

That was twenty-seven years ago. Since then, I have gone every day to the butcher’s to buy a slice of ham or some calf’s liver, which I slip into my net bag between my packet of noodles and my bunch of carrots. I then obligingly flaunt these pauper’s victuals—now much improved by the noteworthy fact that they do not smell—because I am a pauper in a house full of rich people and this display nourishes both the consensual cliché and my cat Leo, who has become rather large by virtue of these meals that should have been mine, and who stuffs himself liberally and noisily with macaroni and butter, and pork from the delicatessen, while I am free—without any olfactory disturbances or anyone suspecting a thing—to indulge my own culinary proclivities.

Far more irksome was the issue of the television. In my late husband’s day, I did go along with it, for the constancy of his viewing spared me the chore of watching. From the hallway of the building you could hear the sound of the thing, and that sufficed to perpetuate the charade of social hierarchy, but once Lucien had passed away I had to think hard to find a way to keep up appearances. Alive, he freed me from this iniquitous obligation; dead, he has deprived me of his lack of culture, the indispensable bulwark against other people’s suspicions.

I found a solution thanks to a non-buzzer.

A chime linked to an infrared mechanism now alerts me to the comings and goings in the hallway, which has eliminated the need for anyone to buzz to notify me of their presence if I happen to be out of earshot. For on such occasions I am actually in the back room, where I spend most of my hours of leisure and where, sheltered from the noise and smells that my condition imposes, I can live as I please, without being deprived of the information vital to any sentry: who is coming in, who is going out, with whom, and at what time.

Thus, the residents going down the hall would hear the muffled sounds indicating a television was on, and as they tend to lack rather than abound in imagination, they would form a mental image of the concierge sprawled in front of her television set. As for me, cozily installed in my lair, I heard nothing but I knew that someone was going by. So I would go to the adjacent room and peek through the spy-hole located opposite the stairway and, well hidden behind the white net curtains, I could inquire discreetly as to the identity of the passerby.

With the advent of videocassettes and, subsequently, the DVD divinity, things changed radically, much to the enrichment of my happy hours. As it is not terribly common to come across a concierge waxing ecstatic over
Death in Venice
or to hear strains of Mahler wafting from her loge, I delved into my hard-earned conjugal savings and bought a second television set that I could operate in my hideaway. Thus, the television in the front room, guardian of my clandestine activities, could bleat away and I was no longer forced to listen to inane nonsense fit for the brain of a clam—I was in the back room, perfectly euphoric, my eyes filling with tears, in the miraculous presence of Art.

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