Read The Definitive Book of Body Language Online

Authors: Barbara Pease,Allan Pease

The Definitive Book of Body Language (7 page)

 

Palm-Up = nonthreatening

 

 

Palm-Down = authority

 

When the palm is turned to face downward, you will project immediate authority. The other person will sense that you've
given them an order to move the item and may begin to feel antagonistic toward you, depending on your relationship with him or the position you have with him in a work environment.

Turning your palm from facing
upward to facing downward completely
alters how others perceive you.

 

For example, if the other person was someone of equal status, he might resist a Palm-Down request and would be more likely to comply if you'd used the Palm-Up position. If the person is your subordinate, the Palm-Down gesture is seen as acceptable because you have the authority to use it.

The Nazi salute had the palm facing directly down and was the symbol of power and tyranny during the Third Reich. If Adolf Hitler had used his salute in the Palm-Up position, no one would have taken him seriously—they would have laughed.

 

Adolf Hitler using one of history's most notable Palm-Down signals

 

When couples walk hand in hand, the dominant partner, often the man, walks slightly in front with his hand in the above position, palm facing backward, while she has her palm facing forward. This simple little position immediately reveals to an observer who wears the loincloths in that family.

The Palm-Closed-Finger-Pointed is a fist where the pointed finger is used like a symbolic club with which the speaker figuratively beats his listeners into submission. Subconsciously, it evokes negative feelings in others because it precedes a right overarm blow, a primal move most primates use in a physical attack.

 

Pointing finger = “Do it or else!”

 

The Palm-Closed-Finger-Pointed gesture is one of the most annoying gestures anyone can use while speaking, particularly when it beats time to the speaker's words. In some countries such as Malaysia and the Philippines, finger-pointing at a person is an insult, as this gesture is only used to point at animals. Malaysians will use their thumb to point to people or to give directions.

Our Audience Experiment
 

We conducted an experiment with eight lecturers who were asked to use each of these three hand gestures during a series of ten-minute talks to a range of audiences and we later recorded the attitudes of the participants to each lecturer. We found that the lecturers who mostly used the Palm-Up position received 84 percent positive testimonials from their participants, which
dropped to 52 percent when they delivered exactly the same presentation to another audience using mainly the Palm-Down position. The Finger-Pointed position recorded only 28 percent positive response and some participants had walked out during the lecture.

 

The pointing finger creates negative feelings in most listeners

 

Finger-pointing not only registered the least amount of positive responses from the listeners; they could also recall less of what the speaker had said. If you are a habitual finger-pointer, try practicing the Palm-Up and Palm-Down positions and you'll find that you can create a more relaxed atmosphere and have a more positive effect on others. Alternatively, if you squeeze your fingers against your thumb to make an OK type of gesture and talk using this position, you'll come across as authoritative, but not aggressive. We taught this gesture to groups of speakers, politicians, and business leaders and we measured the audience reactions. The audiences who listened to the speakers who used the Fingertip-Touch gestures described those speakers as “thoughtful,” “goal-oriented,” and “focused.”

 

Squeezing the thumb against the fingertips avoids intimidating the audience

 

Speakers who used the Finger-Pointed position were described as “aggressive,” “belligerent,” and “rude” and recorded the lowest amount of information retention by their audience. When the speaker pointed directly at the audience, the delegates became preoccupied with making personal judgments about the speaker rather than listening to his content.

An Analysis of Handshake Styles
 

Shaking hands is a relic of our ancient past. Whenever primitive tribes met under friendly conditions, they would hold their arms out with their palms exposed to show that no weapons were being held or concealed. In Roman times, the practice of carrying a concealed dagger in the sleeve was common, so for protection, the Romans developed the Lower-Arm-Grasp as a common greeting.

 

The Lower-Arm-Grasp— checking for concealed weapons—the original Roman method of greeting

 

The modern form of this ancient greeting ritual is the interlocking and shaking of the palms and was originally used in the nineteenth century to seal commercial transactions between men of equal status. It has become widespread only in the last hundred years or so and has always remained in the male domain until recent times. In most Western and European countries today it is performed both on initial greeting and on departure in all business contexts, and increasingly at parties and social events by both women and men.

The handshake evolved as a way men could
cement a commercial deal with each other.

 

Even in places such as Japan, where bowing is the traditional greeting, and Thailand, where they greet using the
Wai—
a gesture that looks similar to praying—the modern handshake is now widely seen. In most places, the hands are normally pumped five to seven times, but in some countries, for example, Germany, they pump two or three times with an additional hold time equal to an extra two pumps. The French are the biggest glad-handers, shaking on both greeting and departure and spending a considerable time each day shaking hands.

Who Should Reach First?
 

Although it is a generally accepted custom to shake hands when meeting a person for the first time, there are some circumstances in which it may not be appropriate for you to initiate a handshake. Considering that a handshake is a sign of trust and welcome, it is important to ask yourself several questions before you initiate the handshake: Am I welcome? Is this person happy to meet me or am I forcing them into it? Salespeople are taught that if they initiate a handshake with a customer on whom they call unannounced or uninvited, it can produce a negative result, as the buyer may not want to
welcome them and feels forced to shake hands. Under these circumstances, salespeople are advised that it is better to wait for the other person to initiate the handshake and, if it is not forthcoming, use a small head-nod as the greeting. In some countries, shaking hands with a woman is still an uncertain practice (for example, in many Muslim countries it would be considered rude to do so; instead, a small head-nod is acceptable), but it's now been found that women who initiate a firm handshake are rated—in most places—as more open-minded and make better first impressions.

How Dominance and Control Are Communicated

Other books

Silence in the Dark by Patricia Bradley
Sweet Addiction by Daniels, Jessica
Vintage Pleasures by London, Billy
The Intercept by Dick Wolf
Inés del alma mía by Isabel Allende
Claimed by the Greek by Lettas, Lena
Their Wayward Bride by Vanessa Vale
The Peregrine Spy by Edmund P. Murray
Urchin and the Raven War by M. I. McAllister


readsbookonline.com Copyright 2016 - 2024