Read The Definitive Book of Body Language Online

Authors: Barbara Pease,Allan Pease

The Definitive Book of Body Language


Why Men Don't Listen and
Women Can't Read Maps


Why Men Lie and Women Cry


Why Men Can Only Do One Thing at a
Time and Women Never Stop Talking


The Little Book of Men and Women


This book is dedicated to all people who have good eyesight but who cannot see.




All Things Are Not What They Seem

How Well Do You Know the Back of Your Hand?

How Well Can You Spot Body-Language Contradictions?

How We Wrote This Book

Your Body-Language Dictionary

Understanding the Basics

In the Beginning…

Why It's Not What You Say

How Body Language Reveals Emotions and Thoughts

Why Women Are More Perceptive

What Brain Scans Show

How Fortune-Tellers Know So Much

Inborn, Genetic, or Learned Culturally?

Some Basic Origins

Universal Gestures

Three Rules for Accurate Reading

Why It Can Be Easy to Misread

Why Kids Are Easier to Read

Can You Fake It?

True-Life Story: The Lying Job Applicant

How to Become a Great Reader

The Power Is in Your Hands

How to Detect Openness

Intentional Use of the Palms to Deceive

The Law of Cause and Effect

Palm Power

Our Audience Experiment

An Analysis of Handshake Styles

Who Should Reach First?

How Dominance and Control Are Communicated

The Submissive Handshake

How to Create Equality

How to Create Rapport

How to Disarm a Power Player

The Cold, Clammy Handshake

Gaining the Left-Side Advantage

When Men and Women Shake Hands

The Double-Hander

Handshakes of Control

The Blair-Bush Power Game

The Solution

The World's Eight Worst Handshakes

The Arafat-Rabin Handshake


The Magic of Smiles and Laughter

Smiling Is a Submission Signal

Why Smiling Is Contagious

How a Smile Tricks the Brain

Practicing the Fake Smile

Smugglers Smile Less

Five Common Types of Smiles

Why Laughter Is the Best Medicine

Why You Should Take Laughter Seriously

Why We Laugh and Talk, but Chimps Don't

How Humor Heals

Laughing Till You Cry

How Jokes Work

The Laughter Room

Smiles and Laughter Are a Way of Bonding

Humor Sells

The Permanent Down-Mouth

Smiling Advice for Women

Laughter in Love


Arm Signals

Arm Barrier Signals

Why Crossed Arms Can Be Detrimental

Yes… but I'm Just “Comfortable”

Gender Differences


The Solution

Reinforced Arm-Crossing


The Boss vs. The Staff

Getting the Thumbs-Up

Hugging Yourself

How the Rich and Famous Reveal Their Insecurity

The Coffee Cup Barrier

The Power of Touch

Touch Their Hand, Too


Cultural Differences

We Were Having Pizza at the Time

Take the Cultural Test

Why We're All Becoming American

Cultural Basics Are the Same Almost Everywhere

Greeting Differences

When One Culture Encounters Another

The English Stiff-Upper-Lip

The Japanese

“You Dirty, Disgusting Pig!”—Nose-Blowing

The Three Most Common Cross-Cultural Gestures

To Touch or Not to Touch?

How to Offend Other Cultures


Hand and Thumb Gestures

How the Hands Talk

On the One Hand…

On the Other Hand, Gestures Improve Recall

Rubbing the Palms Together

Thumb and Finger Rub

Hands Clenched Together

The Steeple

Using Steepling to Win at Chess


The Face Platter

Holding Hands Behind the Back

Thumb Displays



Evaluation and Deceit Signals

Lying Research

The Three Wise Monkeys

How the Face Reveals the Truth

Women Lie the Best and That's the Truth

Why It's Hard to Lie

Eight of the Most Common Lying Gestures

Evaluation and Procrastination Gestures


Evaluation Gestures

The Lying Interviewee

Chin Stroking

Stalling Clusters

Head Rubbing and Slapping Gestures

Why Bob Always Lost at Chess

The Double Meaning

Eye Signals

The Dilating Pupils

Take the Pupil Test

Women Are Better at It, as Usual

Giving Them the Eye

The Eyebrow Flash

Eye Widening

The “Looking Up” Cluster

How Men's Fires Get Lit

Gaze Behavior—Where Do You Look?

How to Keep Eye Contact in a Nudist Colony

How to Grab a Man's Attention

Most Liars Look You in the Eye

How to Avoid Being Attacked or Abused

The Sideways Glance

Extended Blinking

Darting Eyes

The Geography of the Face

The Politician's Story

Look Deep into My Eyes, Baby

The First Twenty Seconds of an Interview

The Solution

What Channel Are You Tuned To?

How to Hold Eye Contact with an Audience

How to Present Visual Information

The Power Lift


Space Invaders—Territories and Personal Space

Personal Space

Zone Distances

Practical Applications of Zone Distances

Who Is Moving In on Whom?

Why We Hate Riding in Elevators

Why Mobs Become Angry

Spacing Rituals

Try the Luncheon Test

Cultural Factors Affecting Zone Distances

Why Japanese Always Lead When They Waltz

Country vs. City Spatial Zones

Territory and Ownership

Car Territory

Take the Test


How the Legs Reveal What the Mind Wants to Do

Everybody's Talking About a New Way of Walking

How Feet Tell the Truth

The Purpose of the Legs

The Four Main Standing Positions

Defensive, Cold, or “Just Comfortable”?

How We Move from Closed to Open

The European Leg Cross

The American Figure Four

When the Body Closes, so Does the Mind

Figure Four Leg Clamp

The Ankle Lock

The Short Skirt Syndrome

The Leg Twine

Parallel Legs

Put Your Right Foot In, Put Your Right Foot Out


The Thirteen Most Common Gestures You'll See Daily

The Head Nod

Why You Should Learn to Nod

How to Encourage Agreement

The Head Shake

The Basic Head Positions

The Head Duck

Picking Imaginary Lint

How We Show We're Ready for Action

The Cowboy Stance

Sizing Up the Competition

The Legs-Spread


Straddling a Chair

The Catapult

Gestures That Show When a Person Is Ready

The Starter's Position


Mirroring—How We Build Rapport

Creating the Right Vibes

Mirroring on a Cellular Level

Mirroring Differences Between Men and Women

What to Do About It if You're Female

When Men and Women Start to Look Alike

Do We Resemble Our Pets?

Monkey See, Monkey Do

Matching Voices

Intentionally Creating Rapport

Who Mirrors Whom?


The Secret Signals of Cigarettes, Glasses, and Makeup

The Two Types of Smokers

Differences Between Men and Women

Smoking as a Sexual Display

How to Spot a Positive or Negative Decision

Cigar Smokers

How Smokers End a Session

How to Read Glasses

Stalling Tactics


Wearing Glasses on the Head

The Power of Glasses and Makeup

A Little Lippy, Lady?

Briefcase Signals


How the Body Points to Where the Mind Wants to Go

What Body Angles Say

How We Exclude Others

Seated Body Pointing

Foot Pointing


Courtship Displays and Attraction Signals

The Emergence of the Colorful Male

Graham's Story

Why Women Always Call the Shots

Differences Between Men and Women

The Attraction Process

The Thirteen Most Common Female Courtship Gestures and Signals

What Men Look at in Women's Bodies

How Beautiful People Miss Out

Is He a Butt, Boobs, or Leg Man?

Male Courtship Signals and Gestures

Men's Bodies—What Turns Women On the Most

Is She a Chest, Legs, or Butt Gal?


Ownership, Territory, and Height Signals

Body Lowering and Status

He's a Big Man Around Town

Why Some People Seem Taller on TV

Try the Floor Test

The Downsides of Height

How Body Lowering Can Sometimes Raise Status

How TV Politicians Can Win Votes

How to Placate Angry People

What's Love Got to Do with It?

Some Strategies for Gaining Perceived Height


Seating Arrangements—Where to Sit and Why

Take the Table Test

It's Not What You Say, It's Where You Sit

King Arthur's Concept

Keeping Two People Involved

Rectangular Board Tables

Why Teacher's Pet Sits on the Left

Power Plays at Home

How to Make an Audience Cry

The Attention Zone

An Experiment in Learning

Getting a Decision Over Dinner


Interviews, Power Plays, and Office Politics

Why James Bond Looked Cool, Calm, and Collected

The Nine Golden Keys to Making Great First Impressions

When Someone Keeps You Waiting

Fake It Till You Make It?

Seven Simple Strategies for Giving You the Extra Edge


Office Power Politics

How to Switch Table Territories

Seated Body Pointing

How to Rearrange an Office


Putting It All Together

How Well Can You Read Between the Lines?

How Did You Rate?


The Seven Secrets of Attractive Body Language


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