Shared for Love (Kagan Wolves) (9 page)

“No.” The word came out before she could stop it.

“What about seen you naked?” His voice deepened, taking on a rough grumble. “Has he undressed you? Licked every inch he unveiled?”

She pressed her palms to his chest. A mistake. The contours of his muscles under her hand tempted her to trace them and map his body, first with her fingers, then her tongue. She shook her head to clear it of the images. “No. We’ve dated. Talked. Held hands.”

He took hers and twined their fingers. “Like this?”

Her mouth went dry. “Yes.”

“Did he hold you this close? Or closer?”

She dragged in air. His scent wrapped around her. Her eyelids drifted shut. “Closer.”

He released one of her hands and drew her flush to his body. Every hard inch of him pressed into her curves. “So he kept your clothes on, but did he touch you through them? Or merely hold you?”

His pointed questions stirred memories of being in Ethan’s arms, feeling the strength contained within him and marveling over his willpower as he fought not to strip her. Lick her, head to toe, exactly as Noah suggested. She’d sensed the battle that had waged within Ethan. She’d always silently begged him to give in. It annoyed her that he hadn’t, but Noah’s insistence she admit how chaste their time had been together angered her more. Noah had no right to know. She’d shared enough.

She yanked her hand free and planted both on his shoulders. Her steady push put space between their bodies. He allowed the distance. The small smile on his face told her that. It also confirmed her thoughts. He was playing some kind of game with her. She could do the same.

She raised a brow. “Didn’t he tell you?”

A half shrug answered her, not surprising her. She turned her back on him and moved toward the window overlooking the clearing where Ethan had met her. Moonlight brightened the world, allowing her to pick out the low-hanging branches where she’d draped blankets from. A wooden chair sat opposite the tree, a change from the one time she’d stood there.

Did Ethan sit there? Maybe wonder what he might’ve stumbled upon if he’d approached her a few minutes later than he had? The image brought a smile to her lips.

She glanced over her shoulder. “Well? Aren’t you going to answer me? Our time is limited you know?”

He grinned. “Aren’t you a sassy female? I like it.”

“That’s nice to know.” And it was, but she rolled her eyes to hide how much. “You’re still avoiding my question, though.”

He closed the distance between them, not cautiously as he had the last time. Chin lowered and eyes glowing, he stalked her. Her pulse quickened. He stepped behind her and hooked an arm around her waist, locking her body to his before she could decide the reason behind her racing heart: fear or excitement.

He dropped his chin to the top of her head. “No, and I have a right to know. Since he hasn’t told me, you will.”

“A right to know?” She turned slightly to look into his eyes. The lust displayed in them hid every other emotion she might’ve been able to gleam from him. “Why, exactly?”

“So I can experience the same.” He inched his fingers down her stomach to the top of her sex, but didn’t linger there. His light caress skimmed the length of her thigh to the edge of her skirt. A shiver skipped down her spine. He fisted the material and bent close, his mouth to her ear. “I will take from you everything he has, and where he has stopped, I will explore first. It’s only fair. He did get to enjoy your smile for six months while I was left alone.”

The featherlight touch of his lips to the spot below her ear skipped more tingles across her skin. Her nipples pebbled, and her lower belly warmed. She ignored both and focused on his words, but couldn’t understand the animosity behind them. “You’re confusing me. How is it your—”

He reversed the path of his hand, dragging her skirt up and stopping her question. The brush of his knuckles against her skin tore a shaky breath from her lips. He made a pleased sound in response and paused with his fingers inches from her panties.

“You’re mine, Hannah. That’s why.”

“Excuse me? I’m not yo—”

He caught her earlobe between his teeth and tugged. Her eyelids fluttered, and she bit her lip to stop any sighs from slipping free. “Shh, don’t argue with me. Listen to me. I can’t imagine Ethan’s visit with your brother and Sean will last much longer, and I need you to understand certain things before he comes home.”

Apparently Sean took her advice and called Ethan. A weight lifted off her shoulders, even as her confusion mounted. “What things?”

“You’re my true mate, Hannah.”

Her hands trembled. She fisted them. What he claimed was entirely possible. She understood that. There was no guarantee a shifter would cross paths with their true mate in time to bind them together or even recognize their connection for that matter. It was just that she’d thought Ethan was hers.

“I can’t be. Ethan brings me peace. I—”

“You are mine. I recognize the connection between us. So does my wolf. It’s what was missing from our bond with Mindy.” He dragged his thumb over her panty-covered cleft, pushing the soaked material between her lower lips. “You’re my true mate, and Ethan is the mate of my heart. You’re both mine. Fate, the spirit wolf, or goddamn luck has dropped the two of you into my bleak life, and I refuse to lose either of you.”

“Ethan is the mate of my heart.”
She considered the words, but could come up with only one way Noah’s statement could be taken.

She turned her head, and Noah’s soft lips brushed over her cheek, leaving a path of awareness and heat behind. “You’re telling me Ethan is your lover?”

“For fifteen years he was, but he hasn’t touched me in six months.” He moved his finger to the edge of her underwear and caressed her sensitive skin, teasing her and leaving her on the cusp between guilt and need. “Yesterday I found out why.”

Tears burned her eyes. She squeezed them shut. “He never mentioned you. Not once.”

“Why would he? I’m his lover, but you’re his future, the female he wants to mate.”

She grasped his wrist. His coiled muscles under her palm warned her she wouldn’t be able to push him away, not unless he wanted it. He had her right where he wanted her. More of her arousal flowed. She swallowed hard, hating the reaction but unable to stop it. “So what? You tricked me into coming here because you’re jealous?”

“I am jealous. For six months, he got to spend time with you. Enjoy your hand in his. Fall in love with you.” The growl to his voice thickened his words. He exhaled slowly, then dropped his forehead to hers. “I was denied that opportunity. I’m angry about that. I won’t deny it, but jealousy is not the reason I arranged for you to come here.”

“What is?”

“Look at me, Hannah.”

His whispered command slammed into her. She couldn’t deny him. She cracked her eyelids, not daring to open them fully. Tears still made her eyes burn.

“I want the chance to earn your love too. He has won your heart, hasn’t he?”

She tightened her hold on his forearm but didn’t push him away. She clung to him. His revelations left her uncertain of everything. She only knew she wanted Ethan to hold her. Never let her go.

She conjured Ethan’s image and took strength and comfort from the promise in his eyes. It was what had kept her going back to him even after he told her he didn’t want a mate. “If I haven’t given the words to him, I won’t share them with you.”

He let her skirt fall into place and wrapped his arms around her waist, holding her flush to him, her back to his chest. With his chin, he brushed her hair to the side and nuzzled against her neck. Each exhale heated her body and weakened her resistance.

“You don’t need to voice them. They’re his to hear. I’ll wait for the ones directed toward me. I’m a patient male and a stubborn one. I won’t relent until I’ve claimed your heart too. You have enough love for both of us. I know it.”

She tried to wrap her mind around what he was saying, but the effect he had on her left her thoughts muddled. “I don’t understand. If you think I’ll want you after I mate Ethan, you’re delusional, and if you think I’ll cheat on him, you’re a—”

He nipped her jaw. The small bite cut off whatever it was she’d planned to say and left her panting. She leaned into him, tipping her head to the side to give him better access. “Do not feel guilty over your attraction to me. Ethan has struggled with the same.”

She squeezed her eyes shut. “Love comes in many forms, and arousal is sometimes a physical response only. Once—”

A flash of light from outside drew her attention. Headlights illuminated the driveway. Ethan was home.
And he’s going to find me in another male’s arms.

She grasped Noah’s wrists and shoved. “Let me go. Ethan can’t see me here with you. He’ll be angry. He’ll—”

“Hannah, stop. We’ve run out of time.” He lowered his voice. “You and Ethan are mine. I’m keeping you both. Do you understand what I’m saying?”

She shook her head.

“I’m going to love you and Ethan. Both of you will share my bed and my cock.”

She sucked in a rough breath and stared at him wide-eyed. “No. I’m going to mate Ethan. I won’t—”

“Yes, you will mate Ethan. Claim a piece of his soul. Give him yours. Have his babies.” He licked the rim of her ear. “But you’ll be my lover too. So will he. He’ll fuck me as hard as he will you, and I’ll do the same. You will watch us, Hannah. Join us.”

Images danced across her mind. The sinful slideshow tempted her with fantasies she’d never considered before. Noah’s words gave them life. She yearned to experience both males touching her, arousing her, loving her. More than that, she wanted to be the center of their world.

“You need to help me convince him that it’ll work. He doesn’t believe his wolf will allow him to share you.”

His words rushed out, reminding her of their situation.

“He’s right, Noah. It won’t. He’ll attack you. Hurt you.”

“Maybe, but he’ll learn to accept it. He has to. Ethan needs both of us. He’ll regret losing me. He loves me, Hannah. He also loves you. Choosing between us will break him, just as losing him will destroy me. Do you understand? You are
our
true mate. You need to bridge us. The three of us and our wolves. Heal us.”

He tightened his grip on her and buried his face into her hair. “Can you do that, Hannah? Can you share us?”

Chapter Nine

The sight of Hannah’s car in his garage stopped Ethan’s heart. It raced a moment later at the implications of what seeing it meant.

She’d come to him.

The why was obvious. She was horny. It didn’t bother him knowing she’d reached out to him for relief. He’d told her to come to him. Well, call him. Either way, the end result remained the same. The female he’d chosen to mate was within reach.

She would learn of Ethan’s heritage tonight along with his commitment to her. It was necessary she understood the depth of his devotion. He worried Noah would go to her with his crazy ideas once he realized Ethan wouldn’t buy into them.

Share her.
He shook his head. It wouldn’t happen. Trying to fight their instincts would ruin his future with Hannah and taint his memories of Noah. It was best he make a clean break. Noah would come to understand, just as Ethan would accept his choice.

It was the right one for his pack.

He glanced out his driver’s side window. The ceremonial circle remained hidden in the woods near his house. Michael had claimed the old alpha’s home per tradition, but it didn’t stand as a sentinel over the ring as many pack alphas had chosen.

Ethan’s parents had built their home overlooking the river and within view of his mother’s pack on the other side. According to the stories told by the elders, Ethan’s mother had been banished from visiting her pack lands after mating Ethan’s father. The house on the cliff had been his gift to her, so she wouldn’t feel so alone.

Whether it had helped soothe the loss of her birth pack’s love or not, Ethan didn’t know, but it had worked in Ethan’s favor. He’d been able to buy the property closest to their pack’s sacred grounds and had built his home on it in anticipation of the day he would take over. His inability to claim a mate had killed his goals.

Tonight, everything would change. He felt it in his bones. Anticipation built. He pulled into the garage, parked next to Hannah’s SUV, and pressed the button to shut the door behind him. It clicked closed, and he slipped from his car.

The lingering scent of Noah in the air hit him, reminding him of what he would be giving up. The ache in his chest he’d ignored all day flared. He gritted his teeth and hurried into the kitchen. The change in surroundings didn’t dim his lover’s smell. Or maybe his subconscious decided to torment him, pulling from memory the stimulant that had aroused him for years. The
only
thing that had.

Because I was fucked up. Still am.
What male could live for close to fifty years and only get hard for one person? He didn’t have an answer. Didn’t care any longer. Someone else had awoken him, and Hannah waited for him. In his house. Maybe even in his bed.

He bit back a groan and made his way across the kitchen but froze midstep. Another smell drifted to him.

Lilacs.

The significance of the flower itself meant nothing to him. It was the fact it hung in the air that set him on edge. He never brought flowers into his house. The only person who did was Noah.

Ethan cursed and rushed to the steps. He took them three at a time and ran down the hallway. His bedroom door opened with his push, banging against the wall. The sight that greeted him tore a snarl from his throat and a growl from his wolf. The animal slammed into him, demanding to be set free. It wanted to attack Noah. Lover or not, he’d crossed the line, exactly the reaction Ethan had expected.

He tightened his hold over the beast. It couldn’t be allowed loose. For one, he didn’t want to hurt Noah. More importantly, Hannah might get injured in the process. Noah held her in front of his body.

Wide-eyed, she stared at him, but the flush to her cheeks and her wrinkled clothing told Ethan everything he needed to know. Noah had decided to take matters into his own hands and screwed up everything, including their friendship.

The urge to rush forward and rip Hannah away from him beat at Ethan. He ignored it for the moment. If he gave in to it, he couldn’t be certain he’d be able to stop. Hannah didn’t need to see him lost to his instincts. He’d worked hard to show her his civil side. His darker hungers had no place in their life together. If she experienced for herself the wickedness he held, he might lose her. He wouldn’t blame her either. Who would want to be mated to an animal anyway?

He curled his fists and took a single step into the room. “Let. Her. Go.”

Noah leveled a challenging glare at him. “She doesn’t want that. She likes being in my arms.”

“She’s horny. You know that, and you decided to take advantage of her body’s needs.”

Noah shook his head. “I didn’t take anything from her she wasn’t willing to give.”

Ethan’s heart beat harder. He didn’t blame Hannah for anything that might’ve happened before he arrived, but the thought of Noah kissing her first enraged him. For six months, he’d fantasized about twining their tongues. Crazy, but he craved it.

Dreamed about it.

He wanted to swallow her breathy sigh. Feel her fingers curl around the back of his neck. Drink of her love.

It was his to experience. Not Noah’s.

Ethan’s fangs dropped, and his claws punched out. The tiny hairs pushing from his skin warned him how far gone he was, but he couldn’t rein in his animal. Jealousy gripped him.

“And what did she give you? Tell me.” He took another step. “Now.”

Noah smirked. “Why don’t you ask her?”

“No. I don’t want her to feel guilt. She didn’t come her seeking you out. She came for me.” He shifted his gaze to Hannah and tried to let her see he wasn’t upset with her. She flinched. More anger seized him. No doubt he looked frightening. He couldn’t help it. He turned his attention back to the male he once loved.

No. I still love him.

Pretending otherwise would ruin him. He simply wanted to beat Noah, punishing him for destroying the only thing Ethan had left of their relationship—his memories. What Noah had done… What he’d taken from Hannah would taint every last one.

“You know what I’ve been waiting to do. You know, dammit.” Ethan snapped his teeth together. “And you took it first.”

Hannah shook her head, sending the black strands of her hair dancing around her. “No, no! We didn’t have sex. I wouldn’t do that to you.”

Noah skimmed his hand over the wild mess of her hair, smoothing her locks. “That’s not what he’s worried about.” He glanced at Ethan. “Is it?”

“Fucker.” Barely coherent, Ethan’s growled word dropped between. He panted and desperately held on to his control. The sensation of claws raking at his insides didn’t help. “You—”

“I didn’t kiss her.” Noah moved his hand to her jaw and urged her to look at him. He leaned closer, inching his lips to hers, but stopped a hairbreadth away. “But I will if you don’t come over here.”

Ethan’s breaths sawed past his parted lips. “Let her come to me, and I will.”

Noah turned slightly. Glowing green eyes locked on to him. The lust in them was clear. Whether Hannah had excited him or Ethan, the effect was the same. Noah hungered, and Ethan knew the male well. Noah would get what he wanted. His relentless pursuit was what broke Ethan’s control years before.

“You see, lover, that’s not how this is going to work.” Noah lowered his voice. “You want her. You come get her.”

Lover.

Ethan’s secret was out. “You told her about us.”

Noah flashed him a lopsided grin. No remorse showed in his expression. “Of course.”

“If you think ruining my relationship with Hannah will keep you in my bed, you’re wrong.”

“I’m not trying the destroy anything.”

No. Noah wanted to go against nature. Share her. A crazed laugh escaped Ethan. The loud snarling of his wolf echoed his sentiments. It wouldn’t work. He’d known it. Tried to tell him. “You have, though. I told you to let it go. We could’ve remained friends. We—”

“Come take the kiss you’ve been fantasizing about before I do.” Noah dragged the tip of his tongue over his lip, wetting it. “I want to taste her too.”

Ethan glanced at Hannah. Mouth opened slightly and eyes slumberous with desire, she looked inviting. Enticing. He wanted her. Craved her. “Hannah?”

She nodded. “I want to kiss you too. Right here. Right now.”

Her words broke him. A siren’s call, that was what her voice was to him. He couldn’t resist the temptation she posed. No more. He needed her, any way he could get her.

He took a step toward her, and Noah slid his fingers down her stomach, dangerously close to her sex. Ethan’s wolf rammed its head into his chest, stealing his breath. He groaned and barely resisted hunching over.

“Ethan.” The sharp bite to Hannah’s voice yanked his gaze to her. She held out a hand to him, palm side up. She stepped away from Noah, putting distance between them but not breaking his hold. Noah’s large hand remained splayed over her belly. “Come to me. Please. I ache for you.”

He wrapped her words around him, letting the need in them strengthen him. He sent the equivalent of a mental growl to his wolf, reminding it he was ultimately in charge. The animal gave one last displeased sound and backed up, retreating to the mystical field where it lived. No doubt it’d rear its head again if it didn’t like Noah’s actions.

Ethan approached, gaze locked on Hannah’s face. Each step eased the rage seeing her in Noah’s arms had caused and stirred the passion Ethan always experienced in her presence. The hungry look she wore enhanced it.

He took a moment to enjoy the raw need displayed in her heavy-lidded gaze. Even knowing he’d loved a male’s body before her didn’t dim it. No, she would devour him. Claim him as completely as he would her. He wanted that, for her to command him. It wouldn’t happen any time soon, though. Not until he got everything he required from her first.

She would moan for him. Whimper for him. Beg him to fuck her. And he would. He’d take her every way a male could have a woman. He’d fill her pussy, her mouth, her ass. Nothing would be off-limits. He’d have it all. She’d welcome him with open arms too. He wouldn’t have it any other way.

Maybe Noah’s little game had one positive outcome. She knew Ethan’s secret. Why hide his hungers? Why keep the beast he truly was chained? She stood in another male’s arms and reached for Ethan, half-crazed and all. The hairs hadn’t even faded from his arms. Neither had his claws. And she held her hand to him, inviting him into her embrace.

He grinned, showing off his pointed teeth. “You want me like this, Hannah? Fucking wild? A goddamn animal? Is this the male you want to kiss?”

“Yes.” She swallowed hard. “Yes. I want you.”

His cock lengthened, and his breathing deepened. He welcomed the lust, let it seep into him and push him forward. Long strides closed the distance between them.

He snatched her hand and yanked her away from Noah. Hannah collided with Ethan’s chest. Her breath rushed out, and she let out an oomph. The second her curves touched his body, his wolf calmed. Still weary but no longer enraged, it sat on its haunches and gazed at Hannah. He could swear there was love in its expression. Yes, he was reading into its reaction. The animal wouldn’t love Hannah, not in the way he did. It needed her, though.

It would fight to keep her too.

The conviction stirred his unease. Hannah’s fingertips along his jaw chased it away. He covered her hand with his. He wanted to apologize. Maybe promise her he’d never touch Noah again. Tell her he loved her.

“Hannah.” Her name was all he could manage.

She mapped his face with her gaze and settled on his lips. “Are you going to kiss me? I’ve waited so long to feel your lips on mine.”

So had he. For six months, he’d imagined what her lips would taste like. Every time, he’d fantasized about how he’d take them, then her. How he’d worship her, head to toe. All the scenarios fell to the side. In the face of her stark lust, he couldn’t think of the right way to make love to her mouth so she’d understand how special she was to him. He only knew he had to have her.

He cupped her face in his hands and bent while she stood on her tiptoes to close the distance. Her rapid breaths warmed his lips. He inhaled, taking her air into him. A rough sound escaped him. Lust, peace, affection—the emotions mixed, overloading him. He wasn’t equipped to deal with them. Males weren’t. They didn’t know what to do with their feelings half the time, only knew they needed them. Hannah understood, and she’d focus him.

Center him.

Make him into the male he was always meant to be.

He traced her lips with his tongue, first the top, then the bottom. Her sigh washed over him, warming him from the inside out. She curled her fingers around the back of his neck, exactly as he’d envisioned. More tempting heat rushed through him. He closed his eyes, and she touched her tongue to his. The hesitant contact broke something inside him. On a groan, he kissed her. No leading. No slow exploration. No back-and-forth loving.

He took from her.

Every breath. Every sound. Every beat of her heart. They belonged to him. So did she. The truth resonated within him with every stroke of his tongue along hers. She met him, dueling with him as if they’d shared a lifetime of kisses. It was good. Her taste, her response, her passion—being with her was everything he’d expected.

But it wasn’t enough. He wanted more.

He tilted his head and devoured her, eating at her mouth as if starved. He was too. He’d waited a lifetime for the kiss of his true mate, longer than any Jager male before him. The thought came and went. The oddness of it resounded within him. There was truth to the inner reflection. He didn’t know what or why. With Hannah’s lips on his, he didn’t care.

He moved his hands to her shoulders, then her back. She was small, delicate, but he felt the strength within her. She was powerful. Not physically. It was more. He’d sensed it from the moment he’d met her. The rough bite of her nails in his shoulder confirmed it. She’d match him. Be his perfect mate. His perfect lover.

She tightened her grip on him and pulled him closer. He took the hint, moved his hands to her ass and lifted her. She wrapped her legs around him. The heat from her sex pressed against his stomach. He felt her need. She’d be wet, dripping in welcome for him. His dick throbbed, eager to slip inside her. He wanted to feel her body conform around him. Mold to him. Take him to the brink.