“Bloom
,
you’ve had me scared to death. Where have you been? Why haven’t you been answering my calls or texts?”
He
rapidly sho
o
t
s
question after question my way.
He loosen
s
the hug enough so he c
an look me over. H
e
’
s checking for an injury. Of course there
i
s none, well at least none he
c
an
see. I d
o
n
’
t think he’
ll
count the invisible hole I ha
ve
in my chest. The concern
ed
look he
’
s giving me ma
k
e
s
the guilt ten times worse when I softly
say
, “Sorry
,
I’ve been sleeping.”
Of course I’
ve
bee
n crying
more than sleeping
, but he d
oes
n’
t need to know that.
His mouth f
a
ll
s
open in shock for a brief second then I
see
his expression turn from concern to an
ger
. When he sp
eaks
I c
an
tell he
’s
trying to hold back his anger, “You mean I have been calling around checking on you all because you were sleeping. How the hell do you sleep for four days? I was on the verge of calling the police department to report you missing
. I stopped by your house and you didn’t answer. I about broke down the damn door just to make sure you weren’t
…
”
He stop
s
himself right there, but I kn
o
w what he was going to say. He thought I was dead. He glance
s
over at the calendar that h
a
ng
s
by the register and then back at me before he scoop
s
me back into
the
hug. “I’m
sorry doll
,
I know you miss him.
I can hardly believe it’s been
a year
.”
The anger I c
an
handle but this I c
a
n’t, not without crying. And crying
i
s not an option! I gently wiggle out of his grip and sa
y
, “Billy
,
I’m sorry about the last several days. I shouldn’t have left you shorthanded but as long as I still have a job I’d like to get to it.”
Thankfully he c
an
tell I
’m not u
p to discussing what today
i
s
yet and
sa
ys
, “I’d never fire you doll. As long as you want a job you’ve got one here. Now get your butt to work.” I
’m
so relieved I
’m not
going to be unemployed that I g
i
ve him another hug before running into the back to grab
my
apron and order pad.
I’
ve
worked for Billy since I was sixteen
.
I
n th
is
area jobs
a
re hard to come by and most people ha
ve
to drive 40 minutes to one of the bigger towns. So I was thrilled when he offered to let me work at the restaurant, even if it
was only a couple days a week. After
Dad
was gone he knew I need
ed
more money to keep up with the house bills so he upped my hours. Billy Garrison
i
s just a big softy at heart, though he’
ll
never admit it.
S
everal
of my regular customers stop in during my shift, I think t
hey
heard
I
show
ed
my face and want to make sure I
’m
alright. Billy
’
s
keep
ing an extra close eye on me
as well. They
’
re all waiting on me to fall to pieces, but I stay strong and d
o
n’t shed a single tear.
This is hard for me to accomplish, especially when someone grabs me into a big hug and whisper things they think are reassuring.
The sweet words only ma
k
e it harder to hold my tears inside. P
art of me appreciate
s
the thought but the other part of me
s
ees
the arms they
’
re holding me in
as
a torture device used to open my freshly healing wounds.
On
break I walk out back to get some air.
Billy’s
is
on the edge of town and the back border
s
the woods. I slid
e
down the wall to sit on the cold ground and t
a
k
e
a deep breath.
I
was
only sitting there a few minutes when I hear the back door open and someone slid
e
down beside me. I d
o
n’t have to look over to know
it
’s
Billy. He
lets out a sigh and then begins
, “
I was going to leave you be but after watching you today I think you need
a
reminder.”
“A reminder?” What have I forgot? I
’ve
remembered every order I’
ve
taken
t
o
night. Even with everything on my mind I ha
ve
n’t slipped up once. What
do
I need a reminder
of?
“Of how much your
Dad
dy loved you, Bloom
.”
“I know
he did
,”
i
s all I c
an
manage to
reply
without crying
.
I c
an
handle being lectured
on messing up an order, heck I can
even handle Billy firing me for not showing up. But this! I wasn’t expecting this talk and
I
’m not
ready
for it
either
. But Billy
isn
’t ready to g
ive
in and he gently
ta
k
es
my chin and turn
s
me to face him.
“Bloom
,
he did and he wouldn’t want to see you this way. You’re so busy thinking about how he’s gone that you’re not remembering the good times you had when he was here. Heck you can’t even
bear
to hear me tell you he loved you.
I see the tears in your eyes doll.
”
H
is calloused hand
reaches out to
wipe away a tear that
breaks free from
the boundary of my lids
(darn him! I
d
o
n’t want to cry
)
.
“Your
Dad
dy loving you
isn’t something
to make you cry.”
Closing my
eyes I softly s
ay
, “I know Billy.
I’m trying to heal.”
“You’re never going to fully heal doll, but you should be able to move on with your life. And I can tell you’re not allowing yourself to do that. Have you even started cleaning out your
Dad
’s room?”
“It’s too soon!” I
shout at him.
“I know it
seem
s
that way, but it
might help
.”
He ignore
s
my outburst, thankfully.
“I don’t think I can
. I haven’t even gone into his room since he’s been gone.”
“Would you like me to come do it for you?” he offer
s
.
I kn
o
w it
’
s something I
need to
handle myself, “Billy I can’t ask you to do that.”
“You didn’t ask
,
I offered.
Your
father was like my brother and that makes you my family. I’d do anything for my family Bloom and I can see you need this.”
Giving in I
flash
him a faint smile and sa
y
, “Thanks
,
I think you’re right. I need to start letting go.”
“Just take it one day at a time doll. That’s all any of us can do.” With that Billy st
an
d
s
and offer
s
his hand to help me up. I t
a
k
e
it
and he pull
s
me to my feet and into yet another hug. I
’m
seriously contemplating getting a t-shirt that
reads
“Stop Hugging Me!”
Letting me go he sa
ys
, “I’ll come over tomorrow morning before work and start if that’s ok
ay
.”
“Yeah that’s fine.”
“Good. Now let’s get back in there
.
Y
our break
’s been over for about five minutes
.”
“I’ll be right there if you don’t mind.”
He look
s
at me deciding whether or not he
’ll
stay with me or go back in
,
but at that very second
another
waitress call
s
his name. “I’ll be right there,” looking back at me he
tells me
, “take your time. I’ll cover your tables till you
’
r
e
back.”
Once again I t
ell
him thanks an
d then watch as he walk
s
inside.
Leaning back against the wall my gaze shifted back towards the woods
. A dark shadow
pass
es
just inside the tree line. I c
a
n
’t make out anything other than
i
t
i
s huge. I start walking towards the woods. I d
o
n’t know what the shadow
i
s but I fe
el
drawn in that direction. I
’m
a few feet away from the tree line when I hear my name called. Snapping out of it
,
I look around where I
am
and back into the woods before backing away quickly to go inside.
Chapter 4 – Pike
~ Seriously messing with my manly mind ~
I track the scent around 40 miles running between the tree line and corn fields. I’m lucky I
’m not
seen by someone dashing between the two. Normally I hide deep in the woods during the day. It’s easier than being seen. People tend to be
frightened
by the size of my wolf.
In my four
-
legged form
I’m
around 250 pounds and
my head is still above most people’s waist.
I
’m
nearing a town
and
I c
an
smell the restaurants and people,
but I
’m not
looking for any of
them. My nose veer
s
me away from them and towards the woods. Ten minutes away I f
i
nd where the scent
i
s strongest, a small cedar cabin
buried deep in the trees
. The small porch ha
s
an old wooden swing hanging from its
beams
and the
re
a
re green and white polka dotted curtains hanging in the window
. Beside the front door there
i
s a welcome sign carved with the family name Daniels. On the opposite edge of the yard I c
an
smell a strawberry patch. It
’
s late in the season but there still seem
s
to be a few ripe berries that need
to be
picked. It
’
s a modest home, but there
’
s a charm. You c
an
tell that the owner t
a
k
es
pride in the place.
There
a
re no vehicles in the driveway and I ha
ve
n’t picked up any sounds from
inside
the house so I decide to take a closer look.