Authors: Niobia Bryant
Tags: #Fiction, #Romance, #African American, #General, #Contemporary Women
He stared at her long and hard. "I don't read
minds, Garcelle, and I don't play games," he told
her coldly.
"And I don't play with people's heart and make
promises I can't keep," she returned in a stiff voice.
Kade sat down on the edge of the bed. "Now
you're giving me riddles?"
"Can we just leave?"
Kade laughed sardonically as he snatched up his
clothes and started to get dressed. "Since you're in
such a rush, I'll wash when I get home."
Garcelle laughed sarcastically. "Yes, hurry and get back to your precious house, with your precious
memories."
Kade paused in zipping up his pants. "Oh, okay.
I see what you're getting at that."
"Yes, I'm getting at the fact that you lied and said
you were ready to move on. I'm here, living and
breathing and loving you, but I'm not about to
fight with a ghost, because it's a losing battle." Garcelle turned away from him, and he saw her shoulders shake with her tears.
He started to go to her, but he stopped himself.
"I love you, Garcelle-"
"But you love her more," she said in a soft voice
as she looked at him.
Kade dropped his eyes from hers, and he felt the
pain he knew he'd caused her.
She dropped the cell phone he'd given her and
the keys to his house on the dresser as she passed it
on her way to the door. "I can't win against a ghost.
I wish you and your memories the very best."
Kade strode across the room and grabbed her
arm. "Don't go, Garcelle. Don't do this."
She looked up at him, and her eyes were gorgeous even as they were filled with pain. "I'll call my
father to come pick me up. Good-bye, Kade."
She pulled her arm away and walked out of the
room. The door closed with the utmost finality, and
the sound echoed deep in his soul.
"Are you okay, Garcelle?"
Garcelle looked up from her textbook to find her
professor smiling down at her, with dentures almost
bigger than her thin mouth could hold. "Yes ... I'm
fine," she said, slightly stumbling as she sat up
straighter in her chair. The eyes of her classmates
were upon her.
"Good," her professor said before she walked
away.
Garcelle released a heavy breath as she forced
herself to focus in class. She had been daydreaming
about Kade ... again.
She missed him and Kadina. She had only seen
him in passing during the last couple of weeks.
And each time it had been torture to watch him
from a distance and wish things could have been
different ... better.
She heard that as soon as the word hit the streets
that their relationship was over, women were back
on the Kade hunt. Maybe one of those dozens of women would be able to make him move past his
wife's death. Obviously, her love wasn't enough.
As soon as class was over, Garcelle grabbed her
books and put on her leather coat to fight the slight
chill in the October air. She headed straight out of
the building and to her car to drive off the campus
in Walterboro to her job at the small diner on the
main road in Holtsville.
She washed her hands and tied an apron over her
lon-n sleeve fitted T and jeans. The bell rung, signaling new customers had walked through the door.
"Customers at table six," Donnie, the owner and
cook, called back to her. "Let's get it moving, Garcelle."
She snatched up an order pad and pen as she
mentally prepared herself for her four-hour shift.
"I'm on it, Donnie," she said, walking out to the
seating area.
"Welcome to . . . ," said Garcelle as she looked
into Kade's face. She forced herself to take a deep
breath and to keep her composure.
"Hi, Garcelle," said Kade.
She cleared her throat. "Kade," she said shortly.
"Garcelle, I didn't know you were working here."
She didn't even notice the rest of Kade's brothers or his father until Kahron spoke. Not wanting
to run into Kade, she had quit her job at Kahron
and Bianca's. "I just started last week. Uh, what
would you like to order?" she said.
Garcelle didn't release the breath she was holding until she gave Donnie the orders and ran out
the back door of the restaurant. "Keep it cool, Garcelle. Calm down," she admonished herself as she
paced. "I can do this. I can do this."
She walked back inside and stood in the kitchen while she looked over at Kade's table. "I can't do
this," she admitted softly.
"Donnie, I need a cheeseburger platter and two
specials," Poochie said as she came into the kitchen.
Garcelle grabbed her arm. "Poochie, take table
six for me, and I'll take table twelve."
"No problem," Poochie said over her shoulder as
she walked back out of the kitchen.
Garcelle ignored Donnie's eyes on her as she
walked out of the kitchen and headed for table
twelve.
Kade's heart had been pounding wildly in his
chest from the moment he looked up and saw Garcelle. As much as he tried to fight it, his eyes kept
drifting to her. Drinking in her presence. Filling his
memories with snapshots of her.
Kade focused his attention back on his steak and
potatoes, but he had no appetite. He dropped his
fork onto his full plate. In the last two weeks, he
hadn't wanted to do much of anything. He missed
Garcelle like crazy.
"You two have got to be kidding me," Kahron said.
Kade shifted his eyes to his brother. "Excuse me?"
"Kahron," Kael said, with a warning in his tone.
"What point are you proving by making yourself
into a damn martyr?" Kahron said, obviously ignoring their father's admonition.
Kade's eyes hardened. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?"
"You're miserable without her, and then you're
making everyone around you miserable because
you'd rather live life looking like a sad hound dog than allow yourself to be happy with another
woman," said Kahron.
Kade looked around the table at his family. "Is
Kahron speaking for himself or for all of you?" he
asked coolly.
Their silence was all too telling.
Kade rose from the table and tossed his napkin
onto his plate of untouched food. "I can't give her
what she wants or what she needs, so excuse the
hell out of me for giving her a chance to go on with
her life and not be led on. If doing that makes me
the bad guy, then so be it."
He turned and stormed away from the table. He
looked up and saw Garcelle standing there, with a
pained look on her face. Damn. He knew that she'd
heard him. He had spoken nothing but the truth,
and he saw by the look in her eyes that the truth
hurt her.
But Garcelle was a remarkable woman. She
didn't go running in the back to cry or rush to him
to cuss him out. She waved good-bye to him like he
was just another stranger in the street before she
tilted her chin up and focused on her customers.
Kade allowed himself another long look at her
before he walked out of the restaurant and climbed
into his SUV. He missed Garcelle in his life in every
way imaginable. He felt like a piece of him was missing, and that made him feel guilty. Loving Garcelle
made him feel like he was forgetting Reema.
When he thought of Garcelle, it was so easy to
picture her in his life as his wife, the mother of his
children, and the stepmother to Kadina. Going to
bed with her at night and waking to her every
single morning for the rest of his life. Garcelle was
a picture-perfect fit for his life . . . completely knocking Reema and all the years they'd shared out
of the way.
Those years with Reema were important to him.
She was important to him. How in the hell could he
just wipe it all away after a few years? Those years
were nothing compared to over a decade of being
in love with her.
When Garcelle left him that night at that hotel,
he had gone downstairs to watch her from a distance. It had made his soul ache to watch her fight
not to cry as she stood in the lobby of the hotel. He
wanted to go to her and tell her what she wanted to
hear-what she needed to hear-but he couldn't.
He would have been lying.
Garcelle's father had once asked him if his heart
was free to love her. He remembered pausing, because he was unable to answer that question with
honesty. Garcelle deserved more than he could give
her. She deserved to be more than a woman living
in his dead wife's shadow.
Bianca was so sick and tired of being face-first in
a commode. She frowned at the taste in her mouth
as she flushed the contents of her stomach. Even
after she rose to her feet and rinsed her mouth, she
stayed in the bathroom. There was solace in there.
She sighed heavily as she dropped the lid and
slumped down onto the commode. Six orseven more
months of this?
There was a knock at the door, and she rolled
her eyes heavenward.
"Bianca ... baby, you have to come out," Kahron
said through the door. "Mimi's here to go over the
wedding plans."
She had to swallow back a hysterical giggle. She
could literally choke herself for opening her big
mouth and talking her father and future stepmother
out of eloping to Vegas.
No, have the wedding here at my house. I'll help plan
it. Sure, we can put together a nice one in six weeks. Sure,
I'm sure.
"What in the hell was I thinking?" she muttered
aloud.
Kahron knocked again. "Did you say something,
baby?"
Between preparing for Thanksgiving dinner at
her house, and the wedding at her house just one
week later, and putting up with Lisha, who was driving her crazy with baby talk, Bianca was ready to
grab Kahron and fly to Vegas ... forever.
Fate was dealing Garcelle a cruel hand. After seeing
Kade and his family in the restaurant where she
worked, she kept bumping into Kade. At the Piggly
Wiggly when she was grocery shopping. At Bianca's
when she dropped her friend and ex-employer off
after a day of shopping in Beaufort. At Kahron and
Bianca's ranch when she dropped off the fish stew
Bianca begged her to make for her. At the menswear
store on Main Street in Walterboro when she took her
father there to purchase a new suit.
True, Holtsville and Walterboro were small towns,
but it was getting to be a bit ridiculous. Over and
over and over again, their paths crossed. Each and
every time, they would look at each other, wave, and move on in opposite directions to continue
living their separate lives.
"Oh God, not again," Garcelle muttered after she
looked up and saw Kade and Kadina stroll into WalMart. Her heart hammered as she whipped her
buggy around and headed in the other direction.
"Garcelle! Garcelle!" cried Kadina.
She winced at the sound of Kadina's voice. She
couldn't dare ignore her, so she plastered a smile on
her face and turned just as Kadina came running up
to her. Garcelle took a step back after Kadina lunged
at her and then wrapped her thin arms around her.
"Hola, little girl. How are you?" Garcelle asked as she
bent to kiss the top of her head.
"I got all good grades in school, and Daddy's
gonna buy me whatever I want," she said, looking
up at Garcelle with bright cocoa brown eyes.
"Oh, he is?" Garcelle asked lightly.
"Yup." Kadina looked over her shoulder. "Right,
Daddy?"
Garcelle bit the clear gloss from her bottom lip
as she finally raised her eyes and looked at Kade.
He shoved his hands in the pockets of his jeans as
he nodded.
"I said I would buy you something, not anything.
There's a difference," he told her, with a grin.
"Sure, Daddy," Kadina said in obvious disbelief.
They all fell into a silence made all the more awkward when Kadina looked from Garcelle to Kade
with an expected air. Kade and Garcelle looked at
each other for what seemed like endless minutes
before they both looked away.
"I better be going," Garcelle said.
"Yeah, we don't want to hold you up," Kade said.
"Adios;" Garcelle said softly before turning to walk
away from them.
She chanced a quick look back, and her heart
broke to see Kadina looking over her shoulder as
they walked away.
"It really is over," she whispered aloud to herself
as she gave the little girl a final wave before she continued on her way.
The holidays were always a tough time for him.
The holidays equaled family, and for so long Kade
had felt like his small family was incomplete. The
holidays were just a poignant reminder of that. On
Thanksgiving mornings in the past, he would wake
up to an empty bed and the heavy smell of cooking
from the kitchen below. He would go downstairs,
sip on coffee, and read the paper as Reema made
all of his favorite dishes. On this day his kitchen was
just a reminder of what he'd lost.
He jumped from the bed and purposely avoided
looking at his wedding picture on the wall opposite
the bed. Thanksgiving dinner was at Kahron and
Bianca's this year, and he was ready for the noise
and chaos that usually ensued when his family got
together. He jumped into a fresh pair of pajama
bottoms before he strode to Kadina's room.
He chuckled at the way she lay across the middle
of the bed, with one arm and one foot hanging off
and with all the covers nearly on the floor. "Up and
at 'em, Kadina," he said, nudging her shoulder.
She scowled in her sleep and scooted back under
what covers were left on her bed.
"Come on. We're going to Uncle Kahron's," he told
her as he bent over to scoop her up into his arms.
Kadina opened one eye and stretched, with her
arms and legs extended. She closed that eye, and
her body went slack as she went back to sleep.
"Girl, I don't know what kind of job you going to
have, loving the bed so much," he mused as he
shook her gently. "Come on and get up, Kadina."
She stretched again before she wrapped her
arms around his neck. "Good morning, Daddy,"
she said in a throaty voice.