Read Glimmers of Change Online
Authors: Ginny Dye
“What do you think of Amber Lou?” Opal asked gently.
Amber considered it and then nodded slowly. “Amber Lou.” She let the name roll off her tongue, tilting her head as she considered. “I like it,” she announced. “But not just for here on the plantation. I want to be Amber Lou forever.”
“Amber Lou it is then,” Eddie agreed. “It’s a fine name.”
The wagon rolled forward in silence for a while. They had talked with Spencer for the first several hours, but now that the plantation was growing closer, the tension closed down all idle conversation. The roads were still hard from frost, but the tight grip of winter had been released. There might be another snowfall, but the cold would not return with such a brutal vengeance. In less than a month, the grass would begin to green and the trees would begin to bud.
“You scared, Daddy?” Carl asked.
Eddie stared down at his little boy looking up at him with eyes wise beyond his age. At ten years old, he had experienced far more than he should have. Eddie didn’t pretend not to know what Carl was talking about, and he didn’t attempt to gloss it over. “I reckon I am, son. It’s going to be real hard to tell Moses and his mama and sister about Sadie.”
Carl nodded. “They’s gonna be real sad,” he agreed. “They also gonna be real sad about Sadie Lou and Susie and Zeke. I reckon they loved them a whole bunch, too.”
“They sure did,” Opal agreed. She sat straighter in the seat as they turned in through the brick pillared entrance to the plantation. It had been their choice to deliver the news in person. She was glad they had come. She knew the telling would be hard, and she knew the grief would be strong, but she also knew being on the plantation for a week would be good for all of them. In spite of her dread of what was coming, there was nowhere she would rather be right now.
Moses was just coming in from the barn where the men were repairing equipment when he heard the rattle of carriage wheels. He stiffened, wondering if they were about to receive another visit from the men who had come on New Year’s Day. He relaxed almost immediately, doubting they would come in a carriage — they would arrive on horseback so they could disappear quickly. Curious now, he lengthened his stride.
Rose stepped out on the porch, bundled warmly in a thick coat, just as he reached the house. “Do I hear a carriage?”
Moses nodded. “Done with school?”
“Yes. I just got home. I let the children out a little early today because it is still so cold. June and Polly were treating their last patients when I left. They won’t be far behind me. Hardly anyone came to the clinic today, but about an hour ago two women came in complaining of stomach pain. June was mixing up an herbal remedy for them when I left. They have drugs for stomach pain, but Carrie says the herbal remedy works best.” Rose fell silent as the carriage appeared in the distance.
“Were you expecting someone?” Moses asked, even though he knew Rose would have told him. Her questioning eyes gave him his answer.
“Who that be?” Annie asked, stepping out onto the porch.
Moses shook his head. “I have no idea, Mama, but I reckon we’re about to find out.”
The three of them stood quietly as the carriage grew closer. The horses stopped grazing and lifted their heads.
“Moses! Rose! Miss Annie!”
Moses’s eyes narrowed as the cries rose into the air. “Carl?” he muttered. “Is that Carl?”
Rose stepped to the edge of the porch and shaded her eyes with her hand. “It is,” she muttered. “What in the world are Opal, Eddie and the kids doing here?”
“They done gone to Philadelphia,” Annie said. “What they be doing here?”
“We’ll get our answers soon,” Moses said reassuringly, trying to ignore the clench in his stomach but seeing the same trouble he was feeling reflected in his mama’s eyes.
All of them hurried off the porch when the carriage rolled to a stop.
“Hello! Hello!” Amber cried as she clambered out of the carriage. “We’ve come to visit!”
Rose caught the little girl close in her arms for a warm hug. “It’s wonderful to see you!” Her eyes met Opal’s, her heart sinking at the pain she saw etched on her face. She caught Amber’s hand and then reached for Carl’s. “Let’s go inside where you can get some hot chocolate and cookies.” She knew instinctively that Opal and Eddie had not come just for a visit. The agony in Eddie’s eyes as he looked at Annie said the news was for Moses and his mama to hear first.
“Cookies!” Carl cried, as he jumped from the carriage. He stopped and looked up into Annie’s eyes. “I be real sorry, Miss Annie,” he said gravely, and then turned to dash up the stairs.
Annie waited until he had disappeared into the house with Rose and Amber before she turned to Opal and Eddie, her eyes questioning.
Moses helped Opal down from the carriage, shook hands with Eddie and Spencer, and then took a deep breath. “What happened?” Then he remembered how cold it was. “I’m sorry. We should go in the house first.”
Eddie stayed where he was standing. “I’d rather the kids not hear us talk about it again. They lived it. I don’t want them to keep hearing about it.”
Annie stiffened. “Lived what? What happened, Eddie? Where be Sadie and Sadie Lou?”
Opal reached down to take Annie’s hands. “We wanted to tell you ourselves,” she said, her voice trembling. “There was a real bad fire at the restaurant. There was an explosion…” Her voice ground to a halt as she looked at Eddie helplessly.
“Sadie and Sadie Lou are dead,” Eddie finished for her, his voice and face twisted with pain. “Susie and Zeke, too,” he managed, his voice barely louder than a whisper.
Moses froze, denial exploding in his head. “
Dead?
All of them? All
four
of them are dead?”
Annie stared at Eddie wildly, her eyes wide with shock. “My Sadie be dead? And the rest? Dead?”
Opal gripped her hands more tightly. “It was a horrible accident,” she said. “The roof caught fire when it was so cold. Zeke and Janie got Amber and Carl out, and then Zeke went back in to help Susie get Sadie and Sadie Lou.” She shook her head, her eyes bright with pain. “The girls were right behind me when we got out. I don’t know what happened,” she whispered. She continued, her voice wavering. “The fire reached the oil vats…”
Moses closed his eyes, trying to block the image of the explosion. “After all the years surviving slavery,” he muttered, “and she is killed by a fire?” Grief blurred his eyes as his brain tried to make sense of what he was hearing.
Rose slipped out to stand by his side, her own eyes filled with grief. Susie had been like a sister to her after the year of living together in the contraband camp. She reached down and gripped Moses’s hand. He gazed down at her, but she wasn’t sure he was aware she was there.
“I’m glad she was free…”
Moses looked at his mama, overwhelmed to see a measure of peace mixed with the torment etched on her face. “What, Mama?”
“I’m glad she was free,” Annie repeated softly. “She gone far too soon, but I be real glad she didn’t die as a slave. She died free.” Her eyes sought Opal’s for reassurance.
“She loved being free,” Opal agreed quietly. “She and Sadie Lou were in school, doing real well. They had both decided to be teachers.” She locked eyes with Rose. “They wanted to be just like you,” she said. Then she looked back at Annie. “Your Sadie was real happy.”
“The explosion?” Moses asked. He wasn’t sure he wanted to know, but he had to ask.
“It happened so fast,” Eddie said quickly, evidently knowing exactly what he was thinking. “I don’t believe any of them felt a thing.”
“They were together?” Annie asked.
Eddie nodded. “They were together,” he confirmed, his voice catching as he remembered finding their burned bodies close together.
“I’m glad she weren’t alone,” Annie whispered.
“I’m so sorry,” Opal said. “So very sorry…”
Annie shook her head. “You didn’t start that fire, Opal.” She heaved a heavy sigh. “There ain’t no making sense of death. It didn’t make sense that my Sam died when they hung him from that tree.” She fixed her eyes on Eddie. “It don’t make no sense how your Fannie died. And now it don’t make no sense how all these fine children died.”
Moses stared at his mama, wondering where her strength was coming from. Sadie had been her life for so long, the one child she had left after Moses and June had been sold off into slavery.
June…
Rose thought it at the same time. “June,” she whispered.
Annie looked off into the distance where they could see the plantation carriage just rounding the bend. “Y’all go on inside where it be warm. I’ll tell June about her baby sister.”
“Mama,” Moses protested.
Annie held up her hand. “It be my baby that died in that fire. We all gonna grieve, but it be my job to tell June she lost her little sister.” She managed a small smile. “I’m just real glad they had time together after all them years apart before my Sadie died.” She stood straighter as she took Moses’s hand. “You go in and get ever’body settled.” Then she turned to Opal. “I don’t figure you’re here just for the night.”
“We’re here for a week,” Opal answered.
“Good. This where you need to be,” Annie said firmly. “Now y’all go inside. I got to talk to June.” Her voice wavered before she forced a smile. “I be gonna wanting to hear all about my Sadie’s last months up in Philadelphia. And I wanting to hear about all the rest of them, too. When my Sadie girl decided to move north with you, I reckon all of you become my family. I be real sorry about your loss.”
Moses went into the kitchen after dinner to help Annie with the slices of pie she was dishing up for everyone. She had refused help in the kitchen, saying she needed some time to move what she had learned from her head into her heart. More than a little awed by his mama’s strength, Moses had tried to be strong for June, barely able to comprehend what had happened himself. He had seen plenty of death in the war, but it had never worn the face of his crippled little sister. He gritted his teeth when he thought about how little time they had together after years of being separated by the slave auction.
“You got every right to be angry,” Annie said as Moses stared into the flames. “I had Sadie all them years. You did so much to make sure we all be together again, and then she got snatched away so quick.”
It was only then that Moses realized his anger matched his grief. He looked down at his mama, realizing that her stout, short body housed a heart much larger than his. “I hope I’ll be like you one day, Mama.”
“You already be like me, Moses. You be a fine man with a powerful lot of love in your heart. You did what you promised to do all them years ago. You set June free from slavery and allowed her little boy to be born in freedom. Then you came after me and Sadie. I don’t reckon we would still be hiding out on that empty plantation, but I sho nuff don’t know what we be doing if you hadn’t come. We for sure wouldn’t have been in such a fine place as this, and Sadie wouldn’t have had no chance to go to school up north.” Annie pressed Moses’s hand tightly. “You done real good, son.”
Moses tried to let her words penetrate his heart. “I don’t feel like I did good,” he admitted.
“Course not. The grief still be swallowing you up,” Annie agreed.
“How come you are so much stronger than I am?” Moses implored. “I feel like I’m drowning inside.”