“Delicious.”
We continue this game throughout our main course. Two filet mignon with four-hundred-degree salt blocks are presented, and Nathan instructs me on how to manage this new experience.
Head over heels. That’s what I am. I think about how much I want this man and how long I get to keep him. He seems like a temporary kind of guy, and I may have to find a way to live with that. Because I’m not ready to stop what’s happening.
“The meal was impressive. This was an incredible choice. Thank you,” I say. “Would you like to have dessert at my house? I have several skills that you haven’t experienced.”
“I’m not going to say no to that, temptress that you are.” He grins. “Check please.”
After he pays the bill, we step outside. The air is crisp and fresh. I breathe in to calm myself, preparing for what’s to come.
“Thank you again. That was lovely,” I say, looking up at him.
“The night isn’t over yet.” He leans over and nuzzles my hair while twisting a blonde curl around his finger. Heat starts to pool in all the right places.
As we wait for the valet, I notice a black limo pulling up. The driver gets out and opens the back door and out steps a beautiful woman with long, sleek black hair. She is petite, fit, and wears a sexy dress that perfectly showcases her figure. An older gentleman follows her, and I watch as her eyes meet Nathan’s. I see her glance at me and my heart speeds up. Do I know her? “Nathan.” She rests her hand on his bicep, and I notice it stays.
“Camilla.”
She turns to the older man. “Father, I’ll be in soon.”
He nods and proceeds inside.
“How are you, Nathan? I haven’t heard from you.”
This is the woman he was with at the club. The one he disappeared with. My emotions are reeling as I realize this.
Nathan ignores her question, turns to me, and says, “Bryer, Camilla is a friend of mine who I train at the gym.”
Friend?
She scoffs and winks at him. I’m left to wonder what’s really going on, and jealousy overpowers me.
This sense of familiarity causes me to panic and triggers my trust issues, from my past to surface, like a storm brewing, I’ll never let myself be put in this kind of situation again, ever…I’m furious.
“I’ll see you at the gym, or better yet, call me.” She says, acting like I’m not even there. Finally she lets go of his arm and leaves.
My mind is swirling when Nathan looks at me.
“We’ll talk,” he says.
But my claws come out. Oh no she didn’t. What a bitch. Still confused and upset, I go over the situation. He didn’t discourage her, but he didn’t introduce me as his date either. And he let her touch him through the entire conversation.
The valet pulls up and I don’t wait. I open the door myself, climb in, and slam it. My thought process moves at warp speed.
Nathan climbs in the car, closes the door, and sits. “Bryer, I can explain.” He looks at me, and when he gets no response, he drives.
My sarcasm is all beneath the surface, but very real and very loud in my brain, even though I have no right to feel this way. He’s not mine, so why do I feel like I was just crushed in a vice? Dark memories stir.
Is there an explanation? Can this be fixed with a few words? Just moments ago, I felt secure, confident, and I believed in him. Am I a fool to want someone who doesn’t want me in the same way?
We drive in silence until we get to my apartment.
“I’m coming up,” he says.
I don’t respond, but my body language doesn’t appear to discourage him. I guess I want to hear what he has to say.
He follows me in to my apartment.
“Maybe a glass of wine?” he says.
I retrieve two glasses while he removes his jacket and tosses it on the chair. He grabs the already open bottle and brings it over to my favorite spot in the house. My velvet down-filled couch, which is so soft and comfortable. It’s like it hugs me back, and I need that comfort and familiarity right now. He pours the wine and hands a glass to me. He fills his, but doesn’t touch it.
“Bryer, hear me out. I don’t know what’s going through your mind, but the truth is not as bad as you think.”
“It’s pretty obvious, isn’t it?”
“Is it? It’s a long story.” He pauses to gather his thoughts. “My father asked me to train a colleague’s daughter for him. My father hasn’t always supported my career, so I was encouraged that he recommended me to his associate.”
Nodding, I decide the less I say the more he’ll reveal.
Sighing, he sips his wine. “I couldn’t turn him down.” He gauges my reaction before proceeding. “Yes, we spent some time together, but it was casual and she was well aware of that. I have never misled any woman who I’ve been involved with.”
While savoring my wine, I pay close attention and look for any signs of dishonesty, but I see none. He takes his glass and finishes it as I watch him closely. I think this is the most I’ve seen him drink.
“I haven’t seen her since
we
’
ve
been together. I’ve never spent the kind of time with her that I’m spending with you. I didn’t try to get to know her like I am with you. What we had was temporary.”
“So did you sleep with her?” I know the answer, but I just want to hear him say it.
“Yes, but it’s over. I didn’t want to create too much drama in case my father found out.”
“Haven’t you already created drama?”
He looks down at his now empty glass. “Bryer, I’m not proud of everything I’ve done in my past, and this is a perfect example. I’ll take care of it. My concern is you, and how you feel right now.” Nathan gazes into my eyes.
I sigh. “Mostly surprised. I thought I felt one way leaving dinner--secure, I guess. Now I feel like you’re out of reach.”
“I promise you, I have not lied to you, and there’s nothing going on behind your back. I still want the same things. I still feel the same about you. Are
you
out of reach?” He slides closer to me and puts his arm around my shoulder. We’re so close I can feel the heat from his body searing me.
“Nathan, I have some trust issues. Ones that I’m not proud of. A cold blade to the heart will do that to you. So, these feelings can easily come to the surface, and I’ll have to work on that too.” My confession leaves me feeling exposed.
Trust is not easily given, yet what has he really done wrong besides have a past? He’s an incredible man. Women would throw themselves at him, including me. At least he wants to see if this can go somewhere.
“I need complete honesty, Nathan. Just promise me you’ll always be truthful. I don’t want to get hurt.”
His eyes burn into mine, and he buries his hand in my hair. Our bodies touch.
“The last thing I want to do is hurt you, Bryer.” He runs the back of his hand over my collarbone. His fingertips linger on the square neckline of my dress, and his eyes never leave mine. “I’ve never put myself out there in this way.”
“You’re worried I’ll hurt you?” I sound as surprised as I feel. “I’ll take care of you.”
He slides so close I can smell that now familiar clean scent, and it’s overwhelming.
My inhibitions collapse while the heat between my legs ignites. How will I survive him touching me? He leans over and places a small kiss between my exposed cleavage, and while he lingers, his hot breath sizzles my skin, zipping straight to my sex. I feel his wet, warm tongue slide between my breasts and I can’t hold back a moan any longer.
He smiles against my chest.
“I need your mouth on mine,” he growls, taking both of my hands and pulling me closer.
Our lips meet and the kiss is hungry. When his tongue slides over my lower lip, I take that as a green light to play. His mouth tastes of wine, and I can’t fight the sharp rush of desire as he kisses me senseless.
As I’m sucking on his tongue, he gives a low growl. Slowly he moves away, and with his hands buried in my hair, he looks me in the eyes and whispers, “Now, repeat after me: I want to be your sex slave.”
My head rolls back as laughter consumes me. “Funny is the new sexy.” Who knew humor would be such a turn on? Game on. I ache for him in every way.
And the mood shifts again.
“Stand” he commands.
Oh, God, that’s intoxicating
. It takes a moment to register due to my lust fog, but I rally my thoughts. He stands and holds his hand out for mine, and I reach out and take it. After he helps me up, we press together for a moment before he slides down to his knees. I tremble and wonder if this is a good idea.
He looks up at me, revealing baby blues filled with hot passion and longing. There’s no possible way I could deny him, or myself. No woman could.
He slowly slides my dress up my thighs.
“Oh God,” I moan.
The dress clings to my body as it glides to my waist. When it slides up over my pink lace panties, Nathan stares at them.
“You’re so sexy, Bryer.”
He plays with the lace, running his finger along the top edge of the lace, prolonging the sweet torture. Then slides the panties down my legs.
Oh Jesus.
“Lift,” he whispers.
The lingerie tangles in my high heel fuck-me shoes and he has to tug them off. I’m grateful I don’t tumble over from the force.
“Sit,” he commands.
I look at him beneath my lashes as I lower myself to the couch.
“Spread your legs, baby.”
“Nathan, you’re killing me,” I whimper.
I try to breathe as my head falls back. Knowing what’s to come makes me anxious to feel those lips and tongue on me.
He plays around the edges of my sex, his tongue teasing me, and I feel like I’m smoldering.
“Do you want this?”
“Very much,” I beg.
Then his sizzling hot tongue makes contact with my wet core.
“Oh my God.”
He licks me from top to bottom.
“You’re so wet.”
Nathan uses his thumbs to spread me open before sucking and licking my folds.
“Right there.” I don’t feel a hint of embarrassment.
My free hand slides through his waves and I hold on. “I’ve dreamt of my hands in your hair, and your stubble scratching between my thighs.”
My words fuel his desire as he continues his assault. “I love a filthy mouth, Bryer.” He smiles.
Fuck.
“Baby, you taste better than I imagined,” he groans.
My legs are spread and raised high, and my fuck-me heels dangle over his shoulders. I feel like I could come just watching this scene. Luckily I don’t have to wait long.
“Fuck, I’ve longed for this.” His mouth is a breath away.
He attacks my clit, licking it up and down in a steady rhythm that feels like he’s fucking me with his tongue.
“Do you feel me, baby?”
“Oh God, yes.,” I gasp out.
I can’t hold on much longer. My moans grow closer together between my panting.
“Come for me, baby,” he growls.
With those final sexy words, I feel an explosion, and it moves straight to my heat. “Nathan... Oh my God,” I scream.
He sucks harder while I slowly drift into ecstasy and my body quivers. I fall apart in his hands.
“You’re all woman, Bryer.”
Nathan rises up and leans into me. His eyes pierce into mine.
“Fantasy becomes reality. I knew it would be like this.” He kisses me tenderly. I can feel his hardness pressing against my body and I know what he needs.
“And what about your pleasure?”
“Tonight is about you,” he says. “This is as far as we go tonight.”
I accept this, knowing we’re moving at a slower pace than he’s used to, though I was in the fast lane tonight.
“BRYER, I WANT
to know more about you.”
Nathan caresses my arm and snuggles with me on the couch. I lean into him, feeling like we’re a real couple. Now at ease, I can share more of my history with this man, knowing he has shared some of his past with me.
“I already told you about my mother, and what a sad, life-changing event that was. My father lives out of state, and we’re not close.” I take a breath and pause, maybe from regret or even guilt. “Like you, I don’t have any siblings, but always wanted them. My best girlfriend is Gen and we’re as close as sisters. I don’t know what I would’ve done without her. She’s been my rock. She saw me shatter into a million pieces and was there to pick me up.” I sigh. “I moved here because Gen lived here, and I needed a new start.”
“I assume a man did this?” Nathan says.
Feeling a tug on my heart, I go on. “I dated off and on during college, but nothing serious until after my mother died. I had one long-term relationship that ended badly. I thought he was the one, but Cash betrayed my trust and broke me. I ran, never telling him where I was going.”
“I will always be slow to trust because of what happened.” A heaviness weighs on my chest. “I’ve never made sense of it all, and I live with the battle scars to prove it.” I give Nathan complete honesty. “A new job, new friends, and a new place helped.”
My sexual past compared to his is like comparing a priest to a stripper. The thought makes me cringe.
“And recently?” Nathan asks..
“Nothing worth mentioning. Just several first dates that didn’t click.”
He nods. “And what is this new career?”
“I love my job.” Gracefully, I switch to this more comfortable subject. “I’m the manager for a marketing and modeling company that sells many different female oriented products. Our own in-house models showcase them. I do a little of everything, from photo shoots and product approval to sales. Little did I know, this is the perfect job for me.
But if you keep up with the endless questions, I might not bring out dessert.”
“Oh, hell no. I’m not missing this.” He grabs my hand and pulls me to the kitchen.
“Coffee or water?” I ask.
“Water.”
“If you want to know more about me, my addiction to caffeine is crazy, I need coffee, for your protection.” We both smile. “Close your eyes.”
“Says the woman who just admitted she needs coffee to keep her sanity. Should we brew a pot?”
While reaching in the refrigerator for my homemade cheesecake, I laugh. I know he’ll fight me over this treat being too decadent. “Trust me?”