I blink, look at the way they're angled toward each other, aggressive and in each other's space.
Oh
.
"How was I supposed to know? You never—"
I beat a hasty retreat, am exhausted by the time I get to the mess, and decide to go back to sleep even though I just woke up. But I end up staring down at the tablet Bastien gave me, and the report Vance submitted about the situation.
"Overextension of abilities", and "traumatic experience", and "recovery time unknown" leap out at me. I turn the tablet off and toss it at the tiny desk bolted to the opposite wall. I stretch again, try to feel for Mikscn, searching the place where he normally rests in my mind, but he's gone like he never existed in the first place.
I bury my face in my hands, trying to ignore the ache. In this tiny room, on this ship with people I barely know, even with Cherian down the hall, I feel more alone than I ever have before in my life.
Vance and Aiya think being apart from Mikscn for a couple of days will help, that I strained myself and him being gone will let my mind rest, but I resent every second that he and Jye are gone. Connecting with Njande, even though it was only for a few seconds, feels like a betrayal.
Mikscn and Jye will come back. They have to. I know they will. But it's silent in my head and I miss Mikscn's comfortable steadiness like a phantom limb. I flop onto my back and fall asleep counting all the times Mikscn and I were synchronized in the adjunct.
Hey there, little one. Why are you crying?
Sh, go to sleep, it'll be okay.
I'm sorry, lambling. Would you like me to sing you a lullaby?
We'll always be here, sweet one, all three of us and Mik. You'll never be alone.
Trust us. Trust him. We love you.
I surface to consciousness slowly, cocooned in warmth and soft skin. I shift and try to push the fogginess away, confused and not liking it.
"Sh." Nails scratch lightly at my scalp, accompanying a gentle prod towards sleep. "We just got in." Jye's voice is a low rumble against my throat.
"You came back," I say thickly.
Mikscn squeezes my arm, fond amusement overtaking my confusion. "Of course we did. We said we would."
"You came back," I whisper again, my eyes squeezed shut so I can revel in Mikscn's emotions.
Mikscn's slow exhale ruffles my hair. "I had to."
I nod. "Okay."
Siobhan discovered the wonderful world of boy love when one of her friends pointed out that two of her characters were probably beating each other up constantly because of unresolved sexual tension. After the seed had been planted, slashy love started showing up with more and more frequency in her stories until she had to own up to being a hardcore slasher and made the transition to writing slash full-time.
She can’t go without writing for more than five days, even if it’s just a couple words scribbled on a piece of napkin or a note in her phone. If Real Life gets in the way and she has to go without her sweet, sweet fix, she morphs into a snarly, grumpy grizzly bear until she can hide in a corner with her laptop and some Good Strong Coffee. She’s not addicted though, stop grinning.
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