Read Face the Music Online

Authors: Melody Carlson

Face the Music (10 page)

I watched David Letterman doing his Top Ten list last night. Yeah, I stayed up kind of late. But anyway, I’m thinking I should make a Top Ten list of reasons why I need to love Tiffany Knight. Okay, here goes nothing.

Top Ten Reasons for Loving
Tiffany Knight
(drumroll, please)

10. Because Jesus said to love our enemies.

9. Because if I don’t love her, who on earth will?

8. Because it will teach me that if I can love her, I can love
anyone
.

7. Because it will make
me
a better person.

6. Because it just might make her uncomfortable enough to bug off for a change.

5. Because she might feel guilty about being so mean to others.

4. Because I’m supposed to love my neighbors as I love myself.

3. Because she needs to experience unconditional love.

2. Because she might realize that God loves her way better than I can.

1. Because God is love, I belong to Him, and He will help me do this.

Wow, that was kind of cool. I actually began this little stunt thinking that I was going to write ten totally lame reasons, but then it started becoming the real thing. Now I feel as if I may be able to do this, with God’s help, of course. I suppose it helps to know that school
will soon be out, and we’ll be leaving on tour by next week, so I won’t be seeing Tiffany Knight for several months. Oh, I am such a coward.

DESPITE ME
i am so hopeless sometimes
so clueless and incapable
i think i have all the answers
but really i am a fraud
if i can’t love the way You love
how can i call myself Yours?
if i can’t be Your hands, Your arms, Your heart
how can i be anything worthwhile?
o God, despite my inability
my failures, my weaknesses
despite my selfish little self
please, love through me
wholly and purely and selflessly
love through me
despite me
touch the world and show Your love
amen

Fourteen
Friday, June 3

Laura graduated from Harrison High with honors today. Hip, hip, hurray! But even more amazing than that was the way she stood up to her mom. Not in a mean way, but simply in an honest and loving way.

Her parents were having a party for her after graduation. Naturally, Laura invited her band buddies to come, and everything was going just fine until Mrs. Mitchell let something slip.

“Laura could’ve been valedictorian, you know,” she was telling a group of their church friends. “Up until this year she had a four point GPA.”

“Mom,” said Laura in an exasperated tone.

“Well, it’s true,” said her mom. “There’s no shame in mentioning it, Laura. And if you hadn’t been involved in your little rock band, I’m sure your GPA never would have dropped like it did this year.”

Now, I could tell by that flash in Laura’s dark eyes that she was ready to lay into her mom right then. But then I’ve never seen her be very disrespectful of her parents, and certainly not in
front of a bunch of people. Still, there’s always a first time. I, for one, was praying for her to stay in control.

“First of all,” began Laura in a calm but surprisingly intense voice. “Redemption is not a
little
rock band.”

Her mother smiled. “Well, there are only three of you.”

“Right.” Laura nodded. “But as far as that valedictorian business goes, I would far rather be a member of Redemption than to have stood up in front of Harrison High and given a speech tonight.”

“But look at the influence you could’ve had for the Lord,” said her mother. “I don’t believe the valedictorian, Sarah Hardwick, was even a Christian.”

“Excuse me,” said Allie, stepping up importantly. “Perhaps you haven’t noticed, Mrs. Mitchell, but Redemption has a fairly widespread influence for the Lord.”

At least that made Laura laugh. “Yeah, Mom, we reach tens of thousands each month. By the end of summer we may have performed for a million.” She glanced over to Willy. “Does that sound about right, Mr. Manager?”

He nodded. “Yep. And that’s not even counting CD sales. I’d say you girls have a pretty good ministry.”

“That is absolutely wonderful,” said a woman from Laura’s church as she patted Laura on the back. “And we are all so proud of you, darling.”

An older man winked at Laura. “And don’t let your mother get you down, honey. When you’re not around, you should hear her going on and on about all the fantastic things you girls are doing.”

Laura grinned. “Thanks, Mr. Howell.”

And so it was all smoothed over. But I have to hand it to Laura for standing up to her mother. After all, Laura is eighteen, a high school graduate, and using her talents to serve God. I’d say the girl deserves some respect!

“Did you see what Rosy sent me?” Laura asked as the three of us girls went out into the backyard. She pulled out what appeared to be a framed photo and held it up.

“That is so cool!” exclaimed Allie.

I looked at the photo and laughed. “Hey, I forgot that Rosy took that.”

“Remember, we were hot and tired and none of us had a key to the bus,” said Allie.

In this classy photo, Allie, Laura, and I had all flopped down, hoping to shock Rosy when she finally came back to the bus. But there we were splayed out all over the sidewalk—arms and legs everywhere, mouths wide open with tongues hanging out, and eyes rolled back like we were
having seizures. Very lovely.

“Wouldn’t that make a great CD cover?” suggested Allie.

Laura laughed. “Yeah, I’m sure Omega would agree with you.”

“Maybe it could be inside the CD case,” I said. “I think it’d be hilarious. Like ‘meet the real girls.’”

So we went and showed it to Willy, who does by the way have a nicely capped front tooth, and he thought it was a great idea.

“You girls,” said Elise. “You really want everyone to know that you’re crazy?”

Maybe so, I’m thinking. Maybe everyone should just lighten up and get a little crazy sometimes. And that, coming from a fairly serious girl like me.

GO CRAZY
sometimes you need to just go nuts
to lose your head and show some guts
sometimes you need to make things risky
to strut your stuff and just act frisky
sometimes you need to have some fun
to go outside and get some sun
sometimes you need to laugh then cry
to do what you’re afraid to try
sometimes you need to run the race
even though it’s a wild goose chase
sometimes you need to act deliriously
and not take life so doggone seriously
cm

Saturday, June 4

Another graduation. Today it was Josh. My parents and I drove up to his college and were totally blown away when Josh stepped up to the podium to give a speech. Okay, he wasn’t valedictorian (and who cares anyway?), but he’d been selected by his classmates to give an inspirational message. I think that speaks quite highly of him. And I must admit that I felt proud. I think being proud of someone else isn’t the same as being prideful about yourself. If I’m wrong, I’m sure God can correct me.

We went out for lunch afterward. I could tell that Josh was feeling a little low. I thought maybe he was sad to see this part of his education coming to an end.

“Are you sure you don’t want to keep going until you have your master’s?” asked my dad hopefully. This is a song he’s been singing a lot lately. Being in the education field himself, I’m sure he feels a responsibility to especially encourage his own children to the highest levels of academia. Unfortunately for him, my oldest brother Caleb has absolutely no interest (at the
moment). And I’m afraid I’m not too anxious to begin my college career, even if I do graduate from high school early.

“Like I already told you,” said Josh. “I really feel I need to get out in the world a little before I go for my master’s. I want some life experiences to add to my education.”

“I think that’s smart,” I told him. “I personally like the idea of going to the School of Life.”

Josh chuckled. “You’re pretty lucky because your ‘School of Life’ actually pays pretty well.”

“Yeah, but it could be over with by August.”

“Willy told me that you girls have a really tough schedule this summer,” said Josh.

I nodded. “We’re really booked. Not only that, but a lot’s riding on us now. The new CD just released, and Omega’s expectation level is higher than ever.”

My mom frowned. “I hope they’re not putting too much pressure on you girls.”

“It’s okay,” I reassured her. “We can handle it. God never gives us more than we can take.”

“Just as long as you’re sure that God’s the One dishing it out,” said Josh.

“I thought Caitlin would be here today,” said my mom.

Now Josh frowned and I realized this was probably what was bumming him out. “Yeah, I
thought she’d be here too,” he said. “Apparently I was wrong.”

“I know she’s got a lot going on right now,” I said quickly. “She just finished her finals and she’s getting ready for our tour. Plus, I heard that her grandparents are visiting right now too. I’m sure she just got really busy.”

He nodded and actually seemed relieved. “That’s probably it.”

“So, how are things going with you two these days?”

He shrugged. “I have absolutely no idea, Mom.”

“Caitlin’s a nice girl,” said my dad. “But there’s no point rushing these things, Josh. I don’t claim to know that much about spirituality, probably not half as much as you kids do, but I do believe that God has perfect timing for everything.”

I nodded. “So do I.”

“Did I tell you that I heard from Caleb a couple days ago?” said Josh. “Everything’s been so busy I almost forgot.”

Naturally, we were all very interested and listened intently as Josh filled us in. Apparently Caleb has a decent job and recently got an apartment of his own.

“But the best part was that he’s been going to Narcotics Anonymous,” said Josh.

“That is so cool,” I said.

“Do you think he’ll stick with it?” asked Mom hopefully.

“We can all be praying.”

“Well, this has been a moving day,” Dad said as he actually blotted his eyes with his napkin. “First I get moved to tears by my son’s amazing graduation speech. Next I hear that Caleb’s doing better.”

“Guess I shouldn’t make any big announcements right now.” I winked at Dad.

He shook his head. “Better save it for next time.”

“You’re always getting the limelight anyway,” teased Josh.

“What? Are you jealous?”

“Sometimes I am,” he confessed. “But then I realize you’re doing what God has gifted you to do and there’s no way on earth I could do that.”

“And you’re doing what God’s gifted you to do,” I reminded him.

So, I guess that settles it. At least two of the Miller kids are trying to follow God’s purpose in their lives. And now it looks as though Caleb is actually making an attempt to get his life on track. I just pray that he lets God help him.

WITHOUT YOU
i am nothing
without You
i am hopeless
without You
i am empty and spent
without You
i am lost and lonely
without You
without You
i am not
amen

Fifteen
Tuesday, June 7

Ah, back on the road again. How I love this feeling. I wonder if I can even explain why it’s so incredibly exhilarating. It’s kind of like the carefree abandon of being a gypsy or a vagabond—singing for your supper. But in all fairness, this is paired up with a very serious feeling of responsibility. Does that make sense?

The carefree abandon part is being on the move, seeing new things, and not having to do much more than focus on music and performances. And of course, we have to stay focused on God too, and our relationships with each other. But those things are all pretty fun and fulfilling.

Now, the responsibility part is being ready—
constantly ready
—to be on stage and to do our very best. This can feel like a weighty load sometimes. But then I’m reminded to trust God. However, it doesn’t feel like a weighty load today. Not with the big blue sky stretching over us and nothing but green fields on either side and a great long strip of highway leading us to our next concert. This is good.

AHHH
like a bird on the wing
how my heart wants to sing
as i soar ’cross the sky
flying high, flying high
like a fish in the sea
flip my tail with such glee
as i slip through the blue
feeling good, feeling new
like a horse running free
no reins or saddle shackle me
with the breeze for my friend
race the wind, race the wind
like a swan on the lake
carving a gentle wake
oh, such a lovely ride
as i glide, as i glide
cm

Monday, June 13

Wow, when Willy said this would be a demanding tour schedule, he wasn’t kidding. But as I’ve told the others, we need to remember to pace ourselves. It’s like we’ve just started running this marathon and we’re not quite in shape yet. But if we give ourselves some time and grace, we should be able to keep up just fine. Anyway, that’s my
hope. I’m also praying that God will give us super strength.

I think out of all of us, Caitlin is holding up the best so far. She’s like a tower of strength and energy. And she’s still very excited about every single detail of this whole thing. It’s fun to see, really.

“Where do you get it?” demanded Beanie yesterday morning when Caitlin was flitting around the living room of the hotel suite the five of us were sharing. She was happily opening drapes and straightening the room that still looked fairly trashed after our junk-food fest the previous night.

“What?” asked Caitlin.

“All that peppy energy,” moaned Beanie from her spot on the couch. “You make me sick.”

Caitlin laughed. “It’s okay. Today’s Sunday, our day of rest. Just take it easy.”

We’d already decided not to go to church since we were singing for an evening service at some mega church that same night—as a promotion for our concert on Tuesday.

But Beanie popped out of her slump by noon. “I gotta go check out this retro store I noticed a couple of blocks down the street. Anyone want to come along?”

“Not me.” Allie yawned. “I’m hanging by the
pool today. Doing basically
nothing
.”

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